Archive of Our Own

Aaron had told Kevin that it was a stupid purchase, really. For what would he even need a smart watch?

But Kevin had insisted and bought him one anyway. With his stupid Exy money nonetheless.

Aaron didn’t want Kevin to pay and buy stuff for him. He had told him countless times, even though Kevin had the money now, it made Aaron feel like a charity project. However, Kevin always argued back that he liked to spoil Aaron and one day Aaron would be a renowned doctor and could do the same for him.

Which in all honesty was a nice thought. But for now Aaron already felt like the lesser in their relationship, because Kevin was already gaining money while he was still in med school. Although he knew that he was working towards his own achievements and thus had to go to med school, he couldn’t help himself and feel like he wasn’t good enough from time to time. Old habits died hard after all.

Besides it was already pathetic enough that Andrew payed for his med school. Also with his stupid Exy money.

“You could use it at the hospital when you’re staying longer. You could just send me a quick message.” Kevin had explained. “And they vibrate when we are close to each other.”

That had made Aaron groan out loud. For all his pretended hatred, he actually thought it was cute. But he would never admit that, not even with a gun up to his forehead.

Truthfully Kevin had always been the more cheesy one out of the two so he obviously had been a big fan of the feature. Even if it was useless in the most general sense ever.

So reluctantly, Aaron had started to wear it. At first, only when he was at the hospital and it was useful. He would quickly type out ‘home late’ and send it to Kevin before continuing his check up walk around the hospital. Or he would receive messages from Kevin asking him if the dinner plans were still up, to which Aaron would reply with a quick thumbs up or down.

But after a few weeks, Aaron had started to wear the watch at home too. And he had even found a few of the features of the watch that he grew really fond of. For example the pedometer or the timer. But what he had really liked was the heart rate monitor monitoring app.

And that was where the problem had originated from. The god forsaken heart rate monitoring app, if only he had never found it.

Aaron usually turned it on after excises to moderate his heart for a while and see how accurate it actually was. So far he had been really impressed with it but he didn’t actually need it.

He liked to think that people with heart problems could benefit from a device like this, if it continue to be as accurate as it was for the few hours Aaron had it on. They could view their heart rate at all times and the watch was even capable to detect sudden changes. So patients could be notified about their faster or slower beating hearts. They did nothing else at the hospital with an ECG.

So Aaron liked it, but he would soon grow to despite it regardless.

It was one of Aaron’s free weekends, where he didn’t have to study and was otherwise off of work. Kevin and him had slept in, for the first time in a while, and Aaron had even managed to keep Kevin in bed when they were both awake to cuddle.

“May I suggest something.” Kevin mumbled into Aaron’s hair. The younger had his head pressed against Kevin’s chest and listened to his calm and steady heartbeat.

“Does it have to do with getting up?” Aaron asked sleepy. If it were up to him they could spend the rest of the day, even the entire weekend, just lying in bed.

“You get to doze for a couple of minutes more, while I make breakfast for us. How does that sound?” Keven traced Aaron’s spine over his shirt which made Aaron shiver.

“Sounds lovely.” Aaron muttered but made no move to get up.

“Aaron, you have to let go of me.” His boyfriend laughed and he felt the chuckles rumble through his chest.

“Don’t want to. You’re comfy.”

“But then you won’t get coffee.” Kevin reminded him.

Aaron huffed and pretended to be annoyed when he lifted his head off of Kevin.

“You are mean.” Aaron reminded him.

“Yeah, I know. I’m such an asshole, who’s getting up and makes you breakfast so that you can rest in bed on your weekend off.” Kevin rolled over and smothered Aaron’s face with a billion kisses, which, much to Aaron’s dismay, elicited a slight chuckle from him.

“Not fair.” Aaron said but leaned up to peck Kevin’s lips before the older got up. Kevin stretched his back on the way out and Aaron admired the beautifully pronounced muscles.

Then he pulled the blanket all the way up to his nose, feeling a lot colder now that his personal heater had left him.

Aaron actually dozed off again and was awoken by gentle rubs over the blanket along his side.

“Hey, sunshine, breakfast is ready.” Kevin greeted him, his voice soft and he had a smile on his face.

Aaron grumbled a somewhat cohesive response along the lines of “five more minutes” and “I don’t want to”, which Kevin only smiled at.

“You promised that you would go on a run with me, Aaron. I, as much as you, don’t want to do it later.” Kevin said, reminding Aaron of his own idiocy.

But Kevin was right, if he lazed around longer the sun would be unbearable in the afternoon hours. As good as sounded to lie in bed all day and forget about the run, he had promised Kevin. And Aaron might be a coward and a couch potato but not someone who let his boyfriend down.

He sighed excessively but pulled the sheets back and sat up. The shirt he was wearing, one of Kevin’s old PSU Exy jerseys, had slipped off of his shoulder and Kevin used the opportunity to plant a kiss on the three moles Aaron had there.

“You’re being overly affectionate this morning.” Aaron commented.

Kevin pulled away, a frown on his face.

“Do you not like it?”

“That’s not what I meant. I’m just wondering why.”

As quickly as the smile gad been gone it was back on Kevin’s face.

“I’m just happy that I have you all to myself for the entire weekend.” Kevin clarified, a faint blush painting his cheeks rose.

Aaron would lie if his cheeks didn’t turn a light pink too. It wasn’t often that their schedules aligned so perfectly that they both had more than the evening off together.

Med school and his residential work at the hospital were time consuming and so was Kevin’s career as a star Exy player. Kevin often spent hours at practice or at the gym and sometimes only came home late at night.

The happier they were when they could finally spend some time together. Usually they would eat dinner together and watch a movie. When they had a whole day they would plan actual dates. But this time, Aaron had wished that they wouldn’t plan too much and just see what their weekend had in store for them.

Except for the run, which Aaron had agreed to when he had come home yesterday and had still still been floating on the cloud of adrenaline from the last exam he had written. And obviously it was biting him in the ass now.

He should really stop making plans when he was in a good mood.

Begrudgingly, Aaron left the bed at last and followed Kevin to the kitchen where his heart stopped momentarily at the sight of the breakfast Kevin had prepared.

Steaming coffee stood next to pancakes with dark chocolate and blueberries, just how Aaron liked them the best.

“Is this your attempt at mending my grumpy morning mood?” Aaron asked as he sat down on his designated place on the right side of the table.

“Well, is it working?”

Aaron took a long sip from his coffee and smiled into the cup.

“Maybe, I’d be a fool to give you that information so willingly, though.”

“You don’t have to.” Kevin chuckled. “I can see the answer on your face.”

Well, damn, since when had his boyfriend become so smooth? He hadn’t been like that in college. There, Kevin had been an awkward mess, an adorable one nonetheless, but it had always felt like Kevin wasn’t entirely sure what he was doing.

Aaron had always thought he would be the less confident one in their relationship and that might still happen on particular bad day where his anxiety overtook every fibre of his body. But the very first months into their relationship Kevin had walked around Aaron like he was made out of glass and any sudden eruption would threaten to break him completely. He’d shy away when Aaron told him he didn’t like something but even more so when Aaron practically flung himself at Kevin.

It had taken a therapy session with Betsy and a really awkward talk with Neil, whom he asked for advice because he was Kevin’s best friend and because the talk with Andrew would have ended in bloodshed, to finally understand it and be brave enough talk about it with Kevin.

Kevin’s fear, much like Aaron’s own, stemmed from the long time abuse which resulted in not feeling good enough and awaiting punishment for potential missteps.

It had taken some time for both of them to get used to making mistakes and not facing punishment. But they had each other and it had helped to be open and vulnerable about it, even if it hadn’t been easy most of the time.

Seeing Kevin this confident and secure now warmed Aaron’s heart and reminded him how far both of them had come over the years.

After breakfast Aaron helped Kevin cleaning the dishes and store away the food they hadn’t eaten. In all honesty, Aaron did it to stall some time and enjoy the easy domestic life they had built for themselves. But even Aaron couldn’t justify hours of cleaning the kitchen and eventually he changed into his running clothes, also known as his old Exy shorts, a t-shirt and his sneakers.

They stretched on the pavement in front of the apartment building. Aaron had turned the heart rate monitor on to watch his heart while he was exercising. 70bpm stood next to the little beating heart. Everything was fine and when Kevin deemed them as ready, he set a timer on his smart watch and then led the way down the street to the nearby park.

At first Aaron fell easily into step with Kevin, after all he had been an athlete once too. But on their second round around the little lake Aaron felt his lounge giving up on him. Every inhale burned and every exhale felt like he was suffocating.

“Wait, Kevin.” Aaron gasped breathlessly.

His legs had already stopped moving as he doubled over to catch his breath. His smart watch sent a notification, he faintly registered but was otherwise utterly deaf by the rushing in his ear.

“You used to be able to run for longer.” Kevin mocked him, but came back to rub Aaron’s back.

“I used to play Exy, too. You know, used, as in the past.” Aaron snapped back.

“Yeah, yeah. Come on, take deep breaths.” Kevin reminded him and after a while the burning in his lungs stopped and he could stand upright again.

“I thought, you were happy to have me around for the whole weekend, so what’s this then? Are you try to kill me?” Aaron joked and Kevin laughed too. So effortlessly and beautiful.

“Sorry, I really thought you were in better condition.”

“You’re overestimating hospital walks.”

They decided then to end their run, much to Aaron’s delight, and instead finish their walk around the lake at a much slower and steady pace. Kevin took Aaron’s hand and drew little circles on the back of it while he talked about Exy practice and their plans for the next games. Aaron was happy to just listen to his boyfriend’s excited ramble about the things he liked.

They discussed their dinner plans too and Aaron filled Kevin in on his work and school schedules for the next week.

It was easy. To have this life, together with Kevin. There had been a time where Aaron had thought he might not get his happy ever after. That he was doomed to always be alone. To watch everyone else sail off into the sunset wrapped around their partner and be blissfully in love.

There had been a time where Aaron had thought he had exactly that with Katelyn but he should have known that it wouldn’t have worked out between the two of them. Ultimately their outlook on a life together had been too different.

Katelyn wanted children, Aaron felt sex positive every once in a blue moon if he was lucky. And even then he didn’t trust himself to be a good parent. Not right now, and probably not in the next ten years. But for Katelyn that had always been the top priority after finishing school.

A house, two kids and safe workplaces.
Aaron had always wished that he would be the one to give her exactly that but he couldn’t and they had mutually agreed to end the relationship before one of them got hurt.

Which in the long run had made both of them so much happier. Katelyn met her now fiancé, Ricardo, a man who worked in finances and from what Aaron could tell was both equally obsessed with Katelyn and watching Exy. Which was good because Aaron still dragged Katelyn to each game Kevin, Andrew and Neil played and it would have sucked if that tradition had to end because of a man.

Aaron on the other hand had found unsuspected love in Kevin, who had always been there but neither of them had actually seen each other. But now that they did Aaron couldn’t be more happier.

At last, he had found someone who shared his plans for the future. An apartment with a balcony, maybe a dog once they were more settled in, but definitely some kind of animal and respect for each other‘s career goals.

Kevin gave him all of that plus time, security and the space he sometimes so desperately needed.

Aaron knew that he wasn’t easy to date with all his trauma, but especially not ever since he had found out he was gray asexual, too. But Kevin had made it clear that he didn’t care, not one bit. Sometimes Aaron was still surprised how normal Kevin had reacted when he had told him the first time. How he respected a no to sometimes even making out and was eager to give Aaron everything he asked for the next day.

Aaron had asked him about it in the earlier days when they had just started dating.

“I like you, Aaron. Not because you sleep with me. If I wanted to have sex I could have literally asked anyone. No, I like to hang out with you and if all we do for the rest of our life is just sit next to each other and talk then I couldn’t be more grateful.” Had been all Kevin had said, and it quite literally had made Aaron’s heart burst.

That had been three years ago and they were still as happy as they had been on that very first day. Sure, they had their ups and downs like any other couple but somehow they had always found their way back to each other.

Because Aaron slept better when Kevin wrapped his arms around him. Because Kevin’s nightmares weren’t as bad anymore when Aaron woke him up.

Because life without Kevin was unimaginable.

“Oh, my god! Is that star Exy player Kevin Day and his longtime boyfriend? Are they holding hands? Someone call the news and get the reports here.” An all too familiar and slightly annoying voice pierced through the peacefulness.

Aaron groaned when he turned around and met eyes with Neil who had a shit eating grin on his face. Next to him stood Andrew, he looked as bored as ever, but Aaron saw the amused glistening in his eyes.

“You’re doing the same, if I may remind you.” Aaron said.

“Yeah, but the difference is, we are not holding hands.” Neil countered.

“Because you didn’t want to.” Andrew muttered, which made Aaron grin.

“I don’t care what the press has to say about my relationship with Aaron.” Kevin noted. “Besides, if you’re on a run too, you’re awfully slow.”

“Don’t pretend you’re any better.”

“We’re already done.”

Neil eyed Aaron and he knew that his reddened cheeks are giving him away.

“I don’t have to be that fit anymore. Working at the hospital doesn’t require for me to be able to run a marathon.” Aaron said before Neil could open his mouth.

“But I’m sure, Kevin will run with you an extra round.”

Aaron watched as Neil’s eyes lit up and let go of Kevin’s hand. He knew his boyfriend wouldn’t pass up another chance for a run.

“Will you? Aren’t you too old already? Maybe I should give you a projection.” Neil started to run. “Whoops, seems like my legs have a mind of their own.”

“You are so on, Josten!” Kevin laughed and ran after Neil, leaving the twin behind.

Aaron shook his head as he turned to his brother. “They will never change, will they?”

“I warned you not to date an Exy freak.” Andrew responded.

Slowly they followed their boyfriends around the lake. This, being together with Andrew and it not feeling like playing chess with the devil, was also something Aaron had never thought he would get. But countless of therapy sessions and hours of just talking with each other had finally brought them onto mutual ground.

Aaron knew now how to read Andrew’s supposedly apathy and all his gestures even the small ones. Andrew in return had started to open up more towards Aaron, had let him in on some of his darker secrets and Aaron hadn’t shied away. Not when it had gotten ugly, not even when it had become unbearable to listen to.

Ultimately it had glued them together, an unbearable bond, that wasn’t as shiny as a diamond but at least twice as strong.

“No hospital shift?” Andrew asked eventually.

“No, I took the weekend off. I wrote my last exam yesterday and decided I deserve some time to rest.”

Andrew hummed lowly and nodded his head. “You should come around our place sometime, too, then.”

Aaron knew that he meant: “I haven’t seen you in a while. I want to spend time with you.”

He let the smile spread on his face freely, not caring that Andrew could see it. Truthfully, he wanted Andrew to see it.

“I would like that.” Aaron agreed. “If you have time, I could stop by tomorrow.”

“Sure.”

“How’s the nicotine withdrawal going?”

“I’ve been chewing gum like you’ve told me to do and Neil’s been taking me on rides when it’s too much.” Andrew answered, he kicked at a rock that jumped across the pavement until it hit a grass patch.

“That’s good. Has it been helping?”

“I guess. Haven smoked in three weeks. But the cravings are unbearable sometimes.”

Aaron nodded his head in agreement. He understood his brother all too well.

“I shouldn’t have locked you in the bathroom.” Andrew suddenly said and Aaron had to concentrate on his steps to not fall over his own feet.

That might have been the closest thing to an apology Aaron had heard from his brother.

“It’s okay. I told you before that I’m not holding it against you anymore.”

They didn’t have more time to talk because Kevin and Neil waited at the entrance of the park for them, engaged in an after work out routine and a borderline obsessed conversation about Exy and their latest win against the Badgers.

“They won’t ever change.” Andrew answered Aaron’s question at last.

A small smile tugged on the corner of his lip and for a second Aaron thought how wonderful it was to see his own smile on his brother’s face.

In mutual agreement, they both dragged their respectful boyfriend outside of the park.

“I’ll text you.” Aaron said over his shoulder when him and Kevin turn right where Andrew and Neil turned left.

Andrew gave him his signature two finger salute and then he was out of his sight.

“Neil said, Andrew missed you. The last time he saw you was at the game.” Kevin told him, as if it was news to Aaron.

“I know. He invited me over.” Aaron answered. It was still a surprise to the other foxes how in tune the twins were nowadays.

It made Aaron believe that twin bonds were real and that perhaps Andrew and him were linked together. All the years before they just had lost their connection but now that they had retied the knot it was stronger than ever.

“That’s good. You should definitely go.”

“Don’t worry. I’ll take you with me. I promised you to spend the weekend primarily with you and I’m keen on keeping that promise.” Aaron reassured Kevin.

The apartment block came into view soon after and Aaron felt giddy so he let go of Kevin’s hand and began to jog lightly.

“Whoever gets to the apartment first, gets to shower first.” Aaron laughed and he didn’t care that Kevin could very well speed past him.

“That’s an unfair start. You’re not better than Neil.” Kevin called after him.

Aaron could hear their equally sped up footsteps on the pavement and knew that Kevin hadn’t gone to his extremes yet.

“I don’t intend to be.”

In the end Aaron reached the apartment door a second before Kevin and if the older had let him win than Aaron didn’t mind it one bit.

“Go take a shower. I’ll prepare a smoothie for you.” Kevin pecked the top of Aaron’s head as he moved past him to get to the kitchen.

“You’ll better not put the disgusting protein powder in it.” Aaron warned him.

“I would never.”

“I have different memories regarding that, apparently.” Aaron called from the bathroom.

He left the door ajar, as he always did, because even after all these years, being trapped inside the bathroom was one of the fears he couldn’t get rid off.

When he was done showering, he slipped into one of Kevin’s hoodies, that was at least three sizes too big on him and swallowed his small figure whole, paired together with boxers and sweatpants.

Then he switched places with Kevin in the kitchen, so that his boyfriend could shower too. He took sips of his strawberry banana smoothie, without protein powder thank you very much, Kevin had left for him on the counter and continued preparing the vegetables for their noodle dish.

Once Kevin came out of the shower they ate dinner together and then decided to watch a series on Netflix. Truthfully, this had been exactly how Aaron had imagined their weekend to go, minus the run maybe but he wasn’t too mad about it. Just the two of them lazing around in Kevin’s apartment without a worry in the world.

“My next game is on a Friday.” Kevin eventually said. The credits of another episode rolled on the screen, reminding them that the next would start soon.

“That’s a school day.” Aaron answered.

He laid cuddled up on Kevin’s side with his head on his chest again. One of Kevin’s arms was wrapped around his shoulder, while he held Aaron’s hand with the other.

“Yeah, it’s in the evening. Do you have work the next day?”

“I’ll have to check, but if you give me the date now I can ask them not to enter me in the roster or ask for a later shift on Saturday.” Aaron replied.

It was weird for Kevin to asked about this kind of stuff. Kevin knew how these things worked, it wouldn’t be the first time they planned around Aaron’s work schedule so that he would make it to Kevin’s game.

Irritated by Kevin’s odd behaviour Aaron lifted his head off of his chest and mustered his boyfriend’s face, but it was neutral, too neutral.

“What’s wrong, love?” Aaron muttered and frowned.

Had he missed something? Was it some important game?

Aaron had to be honest ever since he stopped playing Exy himself he had been pretty out of the loop with it. You would think that he would still be as caught up with it as he was in college because Kevin still played, but Aaron had put all his focus and mind into his med degree.

“We’re playing against the Hornets.” Kevin said through pressed together teeth.

“And?” Aaron asked hesitantly.

He felt Kevin’s heart beating faster and it worried Aaron. What was causing his boyfriend such distress?

Kevin sighed and one of his hands came up to play with the hair in Aaron neck.

“Some of the old Ravens are on that team. It would mean a lot if you could be there.” Kevin confessed at last.

“Oh. I understand. It’s a home game, right? I can text the hospital right now and clarify my schedule with them.” Aaron tried to get up to search for his phone but Kevin’s grip around him got stronger, pressing him back against his chest.

“What?” Aaron asked.

“Nothing. I just love you so much.” Kevin mumbled and Aaron felt his cheeks flush.

“Shut up.”

“Why don’t you make me?” Kevin rose his eyebrow and weren’t it for the cocky smile Aaron might have not given in.

He leaned up and brushed his lips over Kevin’s. They touched for only a second but Aaron felt the rush run through his body regardless. The anticipation of more made him press up closer to Kevin and seal Kevin’s lips with his own again.

The innocent pecks soon turned into a heartfelt make out.

So, Aaron quickly checked in with himself and decided how he felt towards any further actions. Then between kisses he let Kevin know:

“Only kissing.”

“That’s alright.” Kevin panted back and pulled Aaron onto his lap so that they could reach each other better.

Aaron’s hands got caught in Kevin’s hair scraping slowly over the other’s scalp, while Kevin’s hands travelled across Aaron back and along his sides.

The feeling Aaron got whenever he kissed Kevin felt like every summer storm he ever lived through. The heat rush, the tension in the air, the low rumble of thunder, the refreshing cold of the rain.

It was dangerous, but felt so electrifying and free. Aaron was sure he could get high on the feeling alone. It rushed through every fibre of his being, made his head blissfully empty. All that was left was Kevin on repeat.

Kevin and his emerald green eyes. Kevin and his raven black hair. Kevin and the mole on his neck. Kevin and the way he always knew how to approach Aaron even when he was difficult.

Kevin, who got a sunburned nose when he was outside for too long. Kevin, who would wrap his arms around Aaron whenever they stood close together. Kevin, who talked about Exy. Kevin, who never stopped loving him.

And the annoying ringing.

Aaron groaned and tried to ignore it but it wouldn’t stop ringing. Irritated Aaron pulled away from Kevin and looked around.

“Is that your phone?” Aaron asked but he didn’t need to know Kevin’s answer because he knew where the sound came from the second his eyes fell on the bane of his existence wrapped around his wrist.

“No, it should be on- what?” Kevin interrupted himself.

He must have noticed that something was wrong and with how hot Aaron felt he knew that not only his cheeks were burning red.

“Nothing.” Aaron stuttered.

All his focus shifted on the smart watch and his efforts to remove the device off of his wrist before it could send another embarrassing alert. But right in that moment the strap got caught in the buckle and left Aaron helplessly pulling on it.

God, Aaron wished he had told Kevin he wanted an elastic band for the watch. He wished he hadn’t forgotten to turn off the heart monitoring app. He wished that Kevin hadn’t bought him the watch in the first place.

The watch ringed again and now Kevin had full disclosure about what was happening since the screen of the watch was facing his way.

“What does it say?” Kevin asked and tilted his head to the side to read better.

“Warning, rapidly increasing heartbeat. But why?” Kevin had the audacity to asked all innocently. That cheeky asshole knew exactly why.

Aaron groaned. “Can you focus and help me get it off?”

Aaron pulled on the strap again but somehow it felt tighter around his wrist now than it had in the beginning.

“Is it because I was kissing you?” Kevin teased but gently removed Aaron’s hand from the watch to get a look at it.

Aaron felt his cheeks burning and he was glad that his face was already beet red.

“Why isn’t your smart watch sending you alerts?” Aaron accused instead as he sat back further on Kevin’s lap and watched his boyfriend untangle the strap from the buckle.

“Because maybe I’m not that into you.” Kevin looked up and winked.

“Don’t lie, Kevin. I can feel your heart beating against my rip cage every time we make out. It’s as fast as mine if not faster.”

Finally, Kevin’s own cheeks were tinted by a tender pink. Kevin cleared his throat and let go of Aaron’s hand.

“Here, you’re free again.”

Aaron turned his wrist around a few times. Thankful that the watch wasn’t trapping him anymore and thus couldn’t reveal any further pathetic truths about him via message.

He was about to take the device from Kevin and dispose it somewhere far away, however Kevin had already opened the heart monitoring app and was looking at the statistics.

“Wow, 120bpm. That’s really fast.” Kevin muttered, a mix of teasing and adoration filled his voice. “I didn’t know I had such an effect on you. That could be a good cardio for you. It would even involve both of your favourite things: not moving around much and me.”

“Who even said that you are one of my favourite things?” Aaron joked lightly and snatched the watch out of Kevin’s hands.

“Uhm, I’d say the statistics are pretty clear on that. Unless of course I’m sending you into cardiac arrest because you are so terrified of my good kisses.”

“Shut up, Kevin.”

“I think you already know an effective way to make me.” Kevin grinned.

“I’m not kissing you again. You are banned from kissing me until any further notice.”

And if Kevin’s pout made Aaron change his mind immediately again then no one had to know.