Work Text:
“Robin-chwuaaaaaaaaan!!!!!”
Law looked up from the book he was reading. Sanji had entered the library carrying a tray with a drink on it.
“There you are, Robin-chan! I made you this—What the hell are you doing here?!”, Sanji yelled mid-sentence as he seemed to process Law’s presence belatedly. Law was sitting next to Robin and Robin’s phantom arms were holding up a book between the two of them.
“I’m reading.”, Law deadpanned.
“Get away from her! Don’t worry Robin, I will fight him off for you!”, Sanji said.
“No need, Sanji-kun. I invited Torao-kun to the library.”, Robin said, amused at Sanji's overreaction.
“What?! Why? If you need someone to read with, I can provide you with much better company. I know how to read!”, Sanji said, incensed.
“The bar isn’t particularly high, is it?”, Robin teased.
Sanji’s tone shifted back to lovesick. “My Robin-chwuan has standards!’, he said happily as he handed her the drink.
Law rolled his eyes. “Idiot.”, he murmured under his breath. Sanji heard him and became enraged again.
“What was that?! You wanna fight?”
It irritated Law how easy it was to anger Sanji, but somehow it was also amusing. He decided to push his buttons even further.
“No, I have no time to fight “small fry” like you.”, he said, using Sanji’s own words to refer to opponents that are unworthy of one’s time. “I am busy reading with Nico-ya.”, he said and he put his arm around Robin’s shoulders for emphasis.
Sanji’s face reddened and it looked like he was about to burst into flames. “The only reason your head is still attached to the rest of your body is because there is a lady in our presence!”, he bristled before he left the library in a rage. When the door closed behind him, Law removed his arm from Robin’s shoulders.
Law was on deck sharing a drink with Zoro. When they were about to have their second drink, Robin joined them. She refilled their glasses with an arm she had blossomed from the tabletop and poured another for herself.
Law noticed Sanji emerge on deck from the corner of his eyes. A mischievous idea popped in his head.
“You’ve got something in your hair, Nico-ya. Let me get that for you.”, he said.
As expected Sanji stood still at those words, looking their way. Law made a theatrical gesture and tucked a strand of hair behind Robin’s ear.
“Oh. Thank you, Torao-kun.”, Robin said.
Law didn’t bother responding and turned his attention to Sanji.
Sanji was balling his fists and looked like he was about to start releasing steam from his ears. Law smiled at him deviously.
“There was nothing in Robin’s hair, though?”, Zoro said.
“Not anymore.”, Law said as he turned to his drink.
Law was talking to Robin about some questions he had about the medical journal he had been reading with her help. She knew the language it was written in and he had the medical knowledge necessary to piece together the contents of the journal.
“Robin-chwuaann!!”
Sanji was coming. Law had started to enjoy these moments. He knew the sight of him merely standing in Robin’s vicinity had Sanji popping a vein. And Law loved doing nothing to placate Sanji’s anger. In fact, he did the exact opposite.
When Sanji was in earshot, he spoke, adopting an uncharacteristically saccharine tone. “Your mind fascinates me, Nico-ya. Your knowledge on history, politics and culture is unparalleled. I'm very happy that I have you to discuss these things with.". He raised his voice a little. "There are some whose knowledge doesn’t extend past the kitchen!”
Robin was well aware that Law was using her to get to Sanji. Though she didn’t play along with Law, she didn’t stop him from performing these antics either. She merely sighed, bracing herself for Sanji's reaction.
“What did you just say?!”, Sanji shouted, approaching the two of them. Since he didn't use his hands to fight, he raised his leg and pointed his foot at Law's face in a threatening manner, or so he must have believed. “I’ll throw you and your stupid hat overboard!”
Law laughed, satisfied with the ridiculous reaction he had gotten. “I’d like to see you try.”
The two got in a squabble.
“Wait, where is Robin-chan?”, Sanji suddenly said. “You scared her off!”, he said, jabbing his finger into Law’s chest in accusation.
“Me? You’re the one screeching like a pig in a slaughterhouse.”, Law shot back. Sanji glared at him and then walked away.
Law looked across the deck, but he couldn’t see Robin anywhere. He had to admit it was pretty rude how he had cut their conversation short, just to fight with Sanji. Now he was left standing alone on deck, having lost both his conversation partner and his pretend rival.
After another late night reading session, Law and Robin were leaving the library to disperse to the men and women’s quarters respectively. As they entered the hallway, Law saw a silhouette on the other end. He peered in the dark and thought he could make out Sanji. He couldn’t help himself.
He turned to Robin and blocked her path, making her take a step back.
“Torao-kun?”, she said in a startled tone. Law cornered her against the wall. He glanced to the side and saw the silhouette standing still, watching them. He smirked.
He turned back to Robin. Robin didn’t seem to have noticed the silhouette and didn’t understand where Law’s sudden change in demeanor came from. Law ignored Robin’s question and put his hands on the wall, caging her in between his arms. He dipped his head and kissed her.
Suddenly he felt a hand on his chest push him back with force. He slammed with his back against the opposite wall.
Arms sprouted from everywhere restraining his limbs. He lost his balance and fell to the floor, his jaw hitting the floor painfully.
For the first time since they left the library, Law looked Robin in the eyes. She was staring down at him as he laid at her feet. Her face betrayed no emotion. Wordlessly, she walked away from him.
“Wait!”, he called, but she was already gone. The phantom limbs she had produced had vanished, leaving him free to move his limbs again.
Law felt awful about what he had done. He knew Robin was in on the joke he was playing on Sanji and had been gracious enough to let him have his fun, but he had crossed a line just now. He had to apologize to her for his behavior.
The next day he asked Robin whether they could speak in private. Robin stood before him, her arms crossed, face impassive.
“I owe you an apology, Nico-ya. I shouldn’t have taken advantage of your easygoing nature to get at the cook.”, he said. “I got carried away.”
Robin uncrossed her arms. “I appreciate the apology, Torao-kun. Try that again and I will break your neck.”, she said, smiling at him sweetly.
Law looked at her in alarm. She was smiling at him like she hadn’t just threatened to kill him.
For some reason, it made him feel weak in the knees. Why was that attractive to him?
The rest of the day he maintained his distance from her. It was only then that he realized just how much time he used to spend with Robin. They were together in the library often, discussing old manuscripts and world affairs, or sharing a bottle of wine together. Now that he had decided to give her some space, he found he had nothing to do.
He observed her on deck. Did she always hang around Sanji so much or was that a new development?
“Sanji-kun, that is a new shirt, isn’t it?”, Robin said to the cook.
It is! I cannot believe you noticed!!! I am not worthy of being observed by a fair maiden such as yourself! Thou hadst much better spend thy time gazing into a looking-glass than at a common worm like me!”, Sanji said, clasping his hands together as he looked at Robin with utter adoration in his eyes.
The display made Law feel sick.
After dinner, he watched as Robin approached Sanji in the kitchen. “Can I help you with the dishes, Sanji-kun?”
“No, my dear Robin-chwan! I wouldn’t dream of it. A beautiful lady such as yourself should never have to dirty her hands! The thought alone sends shivers up my spine!!! That is a job befitting lowly men such as myself and Trafalgar over there."
"Ya! Don't involve me in your perversions!", Law complained.
"I am your humble servant!!!!”, Sanji concluded his speech to Robin, ignoring Law.
Law cringed at Sanji’s pathetic words, but he had to do a double take as a pair of arms sprouted from Sanji’s back. The hands started massaging the cook’s shoulders.
“Let me help you relax then, Sanji-kun. You work so hard.”, Robin said.
Law felt incensed at the sight, but he couldn’t explain to himself why. What did this have to do with him? He angrily walked out of the kitchen.
It was funny when he got to be the one showering Robin in affection, while Sanji watched. It wasn’t funny at all when he was the one being slighted. Seeing Robin being all chummy with Sanji was just too much.
After some soul searching he could only conclude he liked her more than a friend. Law being Law could not possibly tell her that straightforwardly, so he decided to attempt to seduce her.
He arrived at the library a few minutes before her evening reading session. He lit a few candles, turned off the lights, put a rose (which he had stolen from Robin’s very own flower garden) in his mouth and reclined sideways on the sofa, awaiting her arrival.
Putting the rose in his mouth was a mistake, he realized, as the thorns cut up his mouth. Blood trickled down the sides of his mouth.
No matter. He was nothing if not resourceful.
He covered his hand in the blood and smeared it over his chest. He made sure to remove the excess blood on his face with the sleeve of his jacket. He had to be somewhat presentable for her after all.
When Robin arrived, she noticed the candlelight and her gaze fell on Law.
“Torao-kun?”
Wordlessly, he got on his knees and opened his jacket, exposing her to his torso, where his heart tattoo was colored bright red with his blood.
Robin gasped. “I'm sorry! Were you expecting Sanji? I can go get him for you."
“Sanji?!”, he exclaimed. “Fuck no! Why the hell would you think that?”
"I thought I heard you say that you were going to steal his heart while I was eavesdropping on you when you were talking on the Den Den Mushi."
Law wordlessly reached into the pocket of his jacket, retrieving a transparent cube from it. He held it up to her so she could take a look. Robin's eyes widened when she realized there was a beating heart inside.
Before she could reach out to take it from him, he carelessly tossed it over his shoulder like it was garbage and not someone's living and breathing organ.
"AAHHHHH!!!", they both heard Sanji's voice come from somewhere on the ship as the cube hit the ground.
"He's having a heart attack!!", Chopper's voice sounded out.
"Yayyyy!!!!", Zoro's voice said.
“I like you.”, Law said to Robin as if none of that was happening.
"That's nice.", she said. She approached one of the book cases, selected book and sat down to read it. Law frowned at being ignored.
"No! You don't understand! I like you! In the way that Sanji likes women.", he said. He had such a way with words.
She gave him an amused look. "Are you telling me that blood came from your nose?", she said, glancing down at his chest.
"What?! No! That would be disgusting. It came from my mouth."
"Ah. Lovely."
“And? Do you like me too?", he asked. "What is the answer? Tell me, quickly! My knees are starting to hurt.”
“I appreciate the effort you put into this.”, she said, approaching him. “And… the blood you spilled, I suppose...”, she added. She put her finger to his chest, making a zig-zag motion downwards.
Law looked down at his chest and discovered that she had traced a path through the blood which made his heart tattoo look like it had broken into two.
"But I should tell you that I prefer the company of women.”, she concluded.
“Damn it.", he said, letting himself fall forwards and landing on the floor face first with a loud thud. "I’m going to have to kill myself now.”, he murmured.
“Please don’t. We won’t be able to cremate you properly on the ship and I wouldn’t be comfortable sailing with a corpse on board. We could throw you overboard, but that wouldn't be very polite, seeing as you are our guest after all.”
He looked up at her at those cruel words. He was covered in hearts... she was heartless... they could have completed each other, but alas... “Thanks. I appreciate the concern... for impropriety.”
“I think it's best I request Chopper's assistance.” She gestured at her mouth. “The situation over here is not looking too well.”
Law nodded weakly as another stream of blood escaped his mouth.