Work Text:
Getting to the studio alone was hard enough alone, from making herself get out of bed, rushing to make breakfast and look presentable, to the 30-minute drive that otherwise felt like an eternity due to the nervous anticipation of what was to come.
She already knew by the time she had entered the building, that it was time for closure.
A quiet murmur escaped her mouth.
“This one’s for you, Kita.”
The camera opens to a recording booth, focusing on the single stool and microphone stand placed in the middle, illuminated by a single, warm light.
Hitori Gotou, holding her signature guitar, walks into frame, looking to be in her late 40’s with scattered gray hairs spread across pink locks and wearing a simple black dress that would fit in perfectly at a funeral. The only distinct piece of attire on her being a loosely-fitted bright red zip tie on her wrist.
She had this look of grief in her eyes, as if they were glazed over.
She missed her...
Sitting down, she leaned into the mic and began.
Sheets of empty canvas
Untouched sheets of clay
Were laid spread out before me
As her body once did
Over the years, Bocchi had gotten better at singing, whether it be from being dragged along to karaoke by the band, to those intimate one-on-one sessions where she and Kita would sing and play their instruments together, to finally getting the courage to sing along with her during the band’s concerts. If only 16-year old Bocchi could see her now…
And all I taught her was everything
I know she gave me all that she wore
And now my bitter hands
Chafe beneath the clouds
Of what was everything
She strummed, though being past her prime, she was still incredibly skilled. Remembering all the concerts, all the performances, all the gigs, the familiar movements had woken up her muscle memory, calloused fingers, plucking at strings as if she never quit all those years ago…
All the pictures had
All been washed in black
Tattooed everything
All the love gone bad
Turned my world to black
Tattooed all I see
All that I am
All I'll be
If you asked Bocchi 3 years ago, let alone 3 months ago if she would ever play again, she would’ve figuratively and sometimes literally, slammed the door on you. But many sessions of therapy and consoling with Ryo and Nijika has tamed her grief down to an acceptable level, yet she still refused to ever play the guitar for anyone else again.
But, when she was offered to do one last song for her, instead of ignoring the proposal, she considered it. Thinking about all the years she spent wallowing in her sorrows and never finding closure, or, that’s at least how her therapist put it, she decided to take up on the offer.
Practicing was difficult to say the least, each note reminding Bocchi of her, but she powered through, she would do this for both of their sakes.
I know someday you'll have a beautiful life
I know you'll be a star
In somebody else's sky
But why
Why
Why can't it be
Why can't it be mine?
She was done, strumming the final chord, Bocchi quietly stood up with a faint glint of sorrowful joy in her eyes to leave, but before she could do so, the guitarist looked at her wrist, and took off the crimson zip tie, gently placing it on the stool before departing with her guitar out of frame.
The footage cuts to black, with only one thing being heard.
“I’ll miss you, Kita”
