Work Text:
After The War
Bodies pressed around me in the enclosed stairwell. The heat and sound and smell overwhelmed me to the point of exhaustion. I clung to Beth's hand like a lifeline, desperately pushing forward, away from the death that lay in the Pool. I watched a little girl — Controller or free, I couldn't say — slip to the ground and managed to yank her back to her feet with my free hand before she was trampled. She was one of the fortunate ones.
Beth and I were becoming more and more separated, arms straining as we clutched each other's sweat-slick hands through the crush of people. I felt her hand starting to slip out of mine and clutched tighter. I tried to call out, but my voice was lost in the chaos. More slippage — we were clinging to each other by our fingertips. I desperately lunged back, diving against the push of the panicked mob—
I snapped awake. Beth lay nestled in my arms, exactly where she’d been when I’d fallen asleep. According to the clock by our bed, it was 1 AM. At first I wasn't sure what had awakened me, but then another tap tap tap on the living room window drifted through the bedroom door. My heart pounded. I’d been dreading this.
Beth was still sleeping. She needed to be up for work at five. Best not to wake her. I carefully unwrapped myself from her and made my way into the living room of our small apartment, closing the door quietly behind me. A great horned owl was perched on the windowsill.
‹Can I come in?› it asked.
In response, I opened the window. Turning my back on the owl fluttering into the room, I went into our tiny kitchen and started the coffeepot brewing. By the time I returned, the owl had become a man. An Animorph.
Marco.
"I thought I recognized your picture," he said.
"You were the gorilla at the Pool?" I asked.
"Every time."
"But I mean—"
"I know what you mean," he interrupted. "Yeah, it was me."
We stood staring at each other for a moment, the silence stretching taut between us.
"Why?" he finally asked.
I sat down in the recliner and gestured to the loveseat. Marco remained pointedly on his feet. He didn't trust me, clearly. "Before I answer you, I want to know why you're here," I said quietly. "Curiosity? Official inquiry? What?"
"They asked me to come officially," he said, crossing his arms and leaning against a wall, "but I refused. Just because I fought the war doesn't mean I should have any say in this. But, god damn it—" his voice almost broke but he powered through "—I lost one of my best friends fighting a war so that nobody would have to have an alien slug in their brain. I want to know why you're throwing that away."
Anger rose from the pit of my stomach, burning hot, but I pushed it back. Beth and I had been treated largely like freaks by humans, Andalites, and Yeerk nothlits alike, though our story had become a banner for other voluntaries like us to rally around. But here, at least, was someone who deserved an answer.
"I was never a slave," I began. "You need to understand that to understand this whole situation. I voluntarily gave up control of my body to Taresh because I felt isolated and alone. The Sharing promised me constant companionship — which is exactly what I got." I closed my eyes and cast my mind back. "It started on a Friday evening in early June…"
Four Years Earlier
It started on a Friday evening in early June as the blazing sunset faded and the stars began to peek through the sky. It was just a few days shy of my fifteenth birthday. My Sharing mentor, a recently-graduated high school senior named Cameron, pulled me aside during a beach cookout.
"Sarah, I've got some exciting news for you," he said, his eyes shining.
"What's up?" I asked, trying to sound casual. I thought I knew what he was going to tell me, but I didn't dare hope.
Cameron grinned. "You've been approved. Tonight you can become a full member."
"No. Way." I was ecstatic. I'd been waiting for this day for months. Once you became a full member, Cameron had often told me, there was no loneliness. No otherness. You were one of the family, basically. It was everything I'd ever wanted.
"Come on, let's head over."
I can still remember the tingle of excitement I felt as he led me to the tent where the full members had their private meetings. Mr. Chapman, the vice principal at the middle school, was waiting at the entrance. He smiled and said something friendly. I don't remember what it was — I was so eager that I could barely focus.
Cameron guided me through the flaps of the tent, Mr. Chapman following behind. Inside were about ten or twelve full members of the Sharing sitting in a loose circle around a cooler.
"Are you ready for this?" Cameron asked. I nodded, not trusting myself to speak. He opened the clamps on the cooler. Gross, sludgy grey water sloshed gently inside, churned by the motions of something swimming within. I leaned toward it, confused, then recoiled when I realized that the thing in the water was some kind of slug.
"Don't be afraid," Cameron said.
"What is that?" I asked, eyeing it.
"It's called a Yeerk," Cameron explained. "A sluglike species from another world that lives in lakes called Yeerk Pools. They're blind and barely mobile outside of the water." He sighed. "It's... not the best life."
I blinked at him. I couldn't figure out what he was getting at. An alien slug? Was this whole thing some kind of initiation prank?
"Yeerks have an amazing ability, though," he continued. "They can take symbiotic hosts by wrapping around their brains. The Yeerks use the host's senses, control their bodies. This symbiotic relationship frees them from their limited lives in the Pool."
"They take over people's bodies?" I asked. "Like, they make them puppets?" The idea wasn't an appealing one, fiction or not.
"Kind of," Cameron admitted. "But the Yeerks prefer willing hosts to slaves. Much less unpleasant to work with."
"I guess that makes sense." As much as any of this did, anyway.
"So here's the deal: You let the Yeerk into your brain. It gets to have the experience of being human — seeing colors, walking around, touching and seeing and tasting the world. You get a constant companion, a friend who won't abandon you or ever leave you on your own. A friend who doesn't care about, well, you know. Anything."
I did know, all too well. Cameron had been nothing but supportive since I'd broken down and admitted to him that I was gay. I was sick of hiding all the time. I had no close friends. My parents... I'd like to think they'd still love me if they knew, but I knew better. But the Sharing didn't mind. "All that matters to us," Cameron had said, "is that you're a good person. You want to give back to the community. You care about what really matters."
This seemed like everything I'd ever wanted. It seemed too good to be true. I looked around. If this was a prank, everybody had their poker faces on. "All of you have these Yeerks in your heads?"
Cameron nodded. "My name is Alen Four-Five-Nine," he said. "Cameron wants to speak with you." He closed his eyes for a moment, and something in his body language subtly shifted. He opened his eyes and smiled. "Hey, Sarah," he said. "This is Cameron."
I looked at him for a moment, trying to figure out what was different now that the Yeerk wasn't in control. "Have we ever actually spoken before?" I asked, giving up the scrutiny.
"Not really," Cameron said. "But I've been here the whole time, watching as you grew from an insecure girl into a confident young woman in the time since you've joined the Sharing. I've been hoping you'd be chosen to become a full member. You'll be a great asset to the Sharing, and I think this is exactly what you need as well."
"What's it like, having a Yeerk?"
"I'm not gonna lie to you," he said. "It's kind of weird at first to not be in constant control of your body. But the companionship more than makes up for it." He put a reassuring hand on my shoulder. "I hope you'll join us."
He closed his eyes again, and again there was the subtle shift of something as Alen took control.
"That's about it," Cameron — Alen — said. "There's a Yeerk Pool hidden under the town, which is where we go to feed every few days. You can do whatever you like within the Pool complex while you wait. There's a cafeteria, a couple exercise areas, a library, an arcade, pretty much anything you'd want to keep yourself occupied.
"So, knowing all that, do you still want to become a full member?"
"Does it hurt?" I asked.
"Only a little bit," Alen said. "The Yeerk will enter through your ear, but it secretes an anesthetic to numb everything along the way."
Throughout this entire conversation, the people around the tent hadn't so much as cracked a smile. If this was a joke, it was one of the most expertly planned pranks in history. And I didn't think anybody would go that length just to get a rise out of someone as insignificant as me.
Besides, I'd had enough of being alone.
I took a deep breath. "Okay," I said. "I'm ready."
Like Alen had said, it didn't really hurt when the Yeerk squeezed through my ear and up to my brain. It was more of a distant, numb feeling. There was definitely pain, but it was like it was happening to somebody else.
My body sat up, but not of my own volition.
‹Hello, Sarah,› a not-voice said in my mind. ‹My name is Taresh Five-Five-Eight. Nice to meet you.›
Saturday Evening
"The salmon is delicious, Rhonda," my father said appreciatively between bites of dinner.
"I agree, Mom," Taresh said, to both my parents' surprise. I was emphatically not a fan of fish, but apparently flavorful food was a new experience for Taresh and she was enjoying it a lot. "Did you cook it differently than usual? This is great."
My mother shrugged. "No, it's the same as always. I guess your tastebuds are maturing."
As he ate, my father sifted through the mail, looking for anything important, as he usually did. His eyes lit up as he pulled out an envelope. I could just read the return address: Public Defender of the United States. I groaned internally.
‹What is it?› Taresh asked, too absorbed by dinner to check my relevant memories.
‹It's a political group he supports,› I explained. ‹He loves getting their mail so he can complain about whatever they think is destroying America this month.› I could feel Taresh's confusion. ‹Just watch.›
Sure enough, a few minutes later my father had already thrown the letter down in disgust. "Do you know what those those faggots in Washington are up to now?"
My mother pursed her lips disapprovingly at his language, but didn't say anything. Taresh opened my mouth to protest against the slur.
‹No!› Out of sheer desperation, I managed to seize control of my mouth away from her and clamp it shut before my father could notice.
‹But I know you've voiced complaints about this word before,› Taresh said, confused. In the background, my father was ranting about welfare while my mother nodded along.
‹Not to him,› I said. ‹Never to him.› I called up the memory of the last time I'd talked back to my father, a few years ago. Taresh looked on in horror.
‹Only the most brutal of Yeerks would treat other Yeerks this way,› she protested. ‹This is very strange. I was under the impression that family ties among humans were unusually strong.›
‹Well, they are,› I said. ‹But our family obeys a strict hierarchy set out in the Bible: the Trinity, then the father, then the mother, then the children. It's even in the Ten Commandments: "honor thy father and mother."›
‹Surely you don't think your primitive holy books justify that,› Taresh spat.
‹Look, please don't insult my religion,› I said. ‹I know you don't believe in it, but I do. And no, I don't think it justifies anything he takes out of it, but what am I going to do about it? His house, his rules.›
‹I could arrange to have him infested.›
At this point, we hadn't yet visited the Yeerk Pool. I hadn't yet seen the suffering of the involuntary hosts or learned anything about the war I was now reluctantly a collaborator in. But something about forcibly infesting my father still seemed wrong, no matter how he behaved.
Taresh, party to my misgivings, gave the mental equivalent of a shrug. ‹Very well. I won't have him infested unless his behavior threatens my cover.›
Once my father had run out of steam, my mother changed the subject to one of her favorites: my future husband. "Do you know who I met at the grocery store this afternoon?" she asked me in a tone I knew all too well.
"Who?" Taresh asked with a sigh.
"That boy Cameron, from that youth group you're in," she said. "He seems like a very nice young man. Is he seeing anyone?"
This time Taresh knew enough to dig into my memories of previous interactions before saying anything. What she found didn't please her.
"Mom, it’s not a youth group, anyone can join," Taresh said, rolling my eyes. "Anyway, Cameron's like four years older than me. Gross." Privately, she raved to me. ‹Humans discriminate against one another for their preference in breeding partners?! I was warned about the skin color prejudice, but this is ludicrous.›
"Your father is fifteen years older than me," my mother said, laying a hand affectionately on his. "But that didn't stop us."
‹It's more religious stuff, Taresh,› I explained. ‹You'll understand when we've been together long enough.›
"Yeah, but you guys are old," Taresh teased aloud. "It doesn't matter as much."
"We haven't always been old," my father said with a chuckle. He leaned over and pecked my mother on the cheek. "When we were married, I was 33 and your mother was fresh out of high school."
Taresh and I were both at a loss for how to reply to that, so she turned back to my food. "May I be excused?" she asked when she finished.
"Bring your plate out to the sink," my mother assented.
‹This planet is complete nonsense,› Taresh complained. ‹You'll all be better off when we're in charge.›
Monday Morning
‹Human mathematics are so boring,› Taresh complained as she filled out my math final.
‹It's not like this is advanced math,› I reminded her. ‹Algebra I isn't exactly as complex as it gets.›
‹All the same,› she said, speeding through each problem.
‹Slow down,› I cautioned. ‹And make sure to get some wrong. They'll be suspicious if my grades improve too much all of a sudden.›
‹Surely you don't expect me to deliberately make errors on an examination this simplistic,› Taresh whined.
‹Look, if I'm suddenly a genius, they'll be wondering what's happened to me all of a sudden,› I said. ‹But if I spend the summer working with the Sharing, then my grades next year are suddenly improved, they'll understand that it was the new good influences in my life that caused it.›
‹I'm not sure I'm comfortable that your talent for lying is better than mine,› Taresh said, changing some of her answers and giving a mental approximation of a frown.
I sighed internally. ‹We went over this last night, Taresh. For hours.›
‹I'm merely saying that rejecting one based on one’s attraction to a particular sex over another is ludicrous. Yeerks have no gender and any three—›
‹You've mentioned,› I interrupted. ‹That doesn't change the fact that humans do care, though. It's stupid and I hate it, but that's just the way it is.›
Taresh was silent as she turned my test in at the teacher’s desk. As she sat down, I asked, ‹There are more Yeerks than humans, aren't there?›
‹Yes,› Taresh replied, pulling a devotional magazine out of my backpack and pretending to read it. ‹Because we produce hundreds to thousands of grubs from each union, our population is in the trillions.›
‹So you'll need to make more humans.›
‹Yes,› Taresh said. ‹The ease of human reproduction as compared with other potential host species was part of their appeal to the Empire.›
I mused on that for a moment. ‹Will they make me... you know? With a guy?›
‹It will be expected, yes.›
‹Will you make me?›
Taresh didn't answer.
Monday Afternoon
Mr. Chapman — well, Iniss, really — stopped us in the hallway after lunch.
"At your gym class this afternoon you'll be meeting your direct superior," Iniss said quietly. "Sedret Eight-One-Four, who is Sub-Visser Seventy-two."
"Yes, Iniss," Taresh said.
‹Isn't he pretty much in charge of all the kid Controllers?› I asked as she headed for the tennis courts. ‹Why isn't he a Sub-Visser?›
‹The Yeerk hierarchy is somewhat fluid,› Taresh explained. ‹Prior to the arrival of the Andalites, we were only governed by the Council of Thirteen. The system of Vissers and Sub-Vissers was only established once the war was underway, which was a comparatively short time ago. As a result, most of the higher-ranking Yeerks like Visser Three tend to disregard the lesser ranks, and some Sub-Vissers find themselves under the command of non-officers like Iniss. Besides, the Visser likes to have Iniss do his dirty work, and he evades notice more easily without an official rank.›
Taresh picked up a tennis racket as soon as we reached the courts and started swinging it around with a gleeful smile on my face. ‹I'm looking forward to testing your body's athletic limits. This is my first time with a human host.› Her tone was one of academic interest, but I could feel her eagerness radiating through my mind.
‹Don't get too excited,› I cautioned. ‹I'm not in bad shape or anything, but I'm kind of uncoordinated.›
Taresh actually snorted aloud at that. ‹You want uncoordinated? Here, take a look at my first host.›
I experienced the memory Taresh showed me as clearly as if I'd lived it. The excitement of controlling another body for the first time coursed through me as I — she — opened the alien's eyes. These were way worse than human eyes: colors were dull and washed out, and anything beyond about ten feet away was an indistinct blur. But it was the first time Taresh had ever seen anything, and I could feel her joy as if it were my own. The dim mind of the creature offered no resistance or protest — an editorial thought from my Taresh informed me that Gedds were only marginally sapient, possessing a brain just complex enough to support a Yeerk’s control. She pushed herself up from the pool with clumsy, three-fingered hands, and I noticed that the creature's legs weren't the same length. She stumbled around, trying to accustom herself to the novel experience of being embodied, and I suddenly had an appreciation for how graceful the human form was.
‹You see?› she asked, pulling me out of the memory. ‹Being in my natural state is like being stuck in tar. The Gedd was like swimming through quicksand. Your body is like soaring through the sky.›
A gleam of reflected light caught my eye. Taresh turned to look and a swell of emotions overwhelmed me, momentarily interrupting her control of my body. Beth, a girl I'd been crushing on for a few months now, was walking towards us, grinning at Taresh's antics with the racket, curly blonde hair shining in the sun. We fell to the ground hard.
‹You are attracted to this girl, I see,› Taresh said dryly, picking us up off the asphalt.
‹What's she doing here?!› I panicked. ‹She's not in my gym class!›
Beth hurried over, grin gone from her face, and helped us up. "Are you okay?" she asked, radiating concern. "You must've lost your balance."
"You could say that," Taresh muttered.
A knowing smile crossed Beth's face. "Or possibly control of your host," she murmured.
Our eyes widened. "Sub-Visser!" Taresh said, hastily brushing dirt off my shirt. "I apologize for the lapse."
The Sub-Visser laughed. "It's quite understandable, Sarah. I’ve been told this is your first human host. And call me Beth while we're in public."
"Yes, S— uh, Beth."
We ended up paired together for doubles, so Taresh and the Sub-Visser spent the entire time in conversation. They made arrangements to try to sync up their feeding schedules while I just sort of sat back and watched the two of them effortlessly clobber the other pair.
After gym, the teacher held me back as everybody headed up to the school. "You've been holding out on us," he said. "You should consider trying out for the tennis team next year."
I groaned inwardly. ‹This is all your fault,› I groused.
‹Hush,› Taresh said. "Thanks, Mr. Donalds," she said aloud. "But that was really all Beth. She's so good it made me look good just playing next to her."
"If you say so," he said dubiously. "I thought I saw you make a couple of really good saves, though."
"Just dumb luck, I guess," Taresh said, smiling innocently.
‹You know,› I said as we made our way back up to the school, ‹for someone designed to invade by stealth, you are terrible at maintaining cover.›
‹Oh, shut up.›
Wednesday Evening
I sat in the cafeteria near the Yeerk Pool, poking at a cheeseburger and fingering the cross pendant my mother had given me for my birthday. I tried to ignore the faint screams that drifted in despite the room's soundproofing. After my first trip to the Pool, Taresh and I had argued long into the night about the necessity of enslaving involuntary hosts. Taresh had shown me a memory of what her life was like in the Pool before being assigned a host and pointed out that if the Yeerks relied only on voluntary hosts, most would never get to experience anything more.
‹But is it worth forcibly taking away their freedom?› I'd argued. ‹What if I hadn't been voluntary? Would you still have taken me as a host?›
‹Of course,› Taresh had replied. ‹I was under orders. Although I admit this arrangement is more to my liking.›
That argument had ended fruitlessly for both of us. The Yeerks' culture seemed to stress conformity and obedience rather than freedom and independent thought, so the idea that they shouldn't enslave other species was kind of alien to Taresh.
Would a loving God create Yeerks? I wondered.
Someone sat down across from me and I looked up to see a familiar face. "Sub-Visser!" I said, straightening up and nearly choking on a bite of burger.
She dazzled me with a braces-filled smile. "Just Beth," she said, eating one of her fries. "So you're voluntary too, huh?"
"Uh, yeah," I said, avoiding her gaze. Her beautiful, blue-eyed gaze, boring into me like a drill into— now I was staring at her eyes. Great. "I, uh, Taresh and I, we, uh..."
Beth put her hand on one of mine and I thought I was going to have a heart attack. "Calm down, Sarah," she said. "My Yeerk is your Yeerk's superior, but we're just people."
I took a deep breath, relieved that she'd misunderstood my flustered state. "Right," I said. "I was... God, I don't want to say infested, that sounds so negative. I became Taresh's host last Friday."
"I've been a host for about a year," Beth said. "Sedret — that's the Sub-Visser — is my third Yeerk, and the first one I actually like."
"Oh?" I asked before taking a bite of my burger. A splotch of mustard and ketchup squirted out from under the bun into my chin. I felt myself blushing as I reached for a napkin.
Beth giggled and got to the napkins first, gently wiping the mess off my face. I felt goosebumps prickling their way up my arms and silently thanked Taresh for wearing long sleeves today. "Yeah," she said. "My first two Yeerks were… fine, I guess. Much better than some I’ve heard about. Polite, but distant."
"But the Sub-Visser isn’t like that?" I asked, stealing a fry from her tray.
She swatted playfully at my hand. "Sedret is like having a best friend always on call. I mean, we don't always get along perfectly..." She leaned conspiratorially towards me and added quietly, "I may or may not have thrown her aim off the last time we faced off against the Andalite bandits." She sat back and took a bite of a chicken finger. "But most of the time we're thick as thieves. She says she'd even let me control the body more often if it wouldn't be considered fraternizing."
I thought back to the previous evening, when my mother had insisted I work on my long-neglected piano practice. Completely unfamiliar with the concept of instruments, Taresh, fascinated, had withdrawn into my head to watch and listen while I played for her for a full hour. My mother was ecstatic — usually it was like pulling teeth to get me to practice for thirty minutes.
I decided not to tell Sarah about that. The Sub-Visser would probably be required to reprimand Taresh or something.
Beth glanced up at the clock. "I should get back to the pier," she said. "Sedret should be about ready to come out." She stood up. "We should meet like this next time. This was nice." She leaned towards me as I took a sip of my soda. "And you're kind of cute."
I choked, squirting soda painfully out of my nose. She pulled back hastily as I tried to clean myself up. "Sorry! I'm sorry," she said. "I don't know what I was thinking. That was weird of me. I'll just, uh, I'll, uh, be off, then."
She hurried past me toward the door. Acting on impulse, I grabbed her hand before she could get away. She stopped without looking at me. "I'd like that," I said.
I saw Beth’s lips curve in a smile, and she squeezed my hand before walking to the door.
Tuesday Afternoon
After school let out for the year, the timing of our visits to the Pool were a bit fluid. We always made sure to go every two days, of course, but not having to deal with school and homework made things a bit more flexible. Beth and I weren't quite hungry yet when we got to the Pool, so we spent Sedret and Taresh's feeding time playing air hockey. After she delivered a couple of thorough butt-whoopings, we picked up our Yeerks, who went to the cafeteria to pick up dinner.
"It seems our hosts are very fond of one another," Sedret said through a mouthful of mashed potatoes.
If I'd been in control of our body at the time I would've blushed furiously. And while Taresh wasn't cruel enough to do it deliberately, she wasn’t inclined to make the situation any less uncomfortable either. "Oh, most definitely. The dreams Sarah has about Beth... well, frankly, they almost embarrass me."
‹TARESH!› I whined. ‹Not cool! Beth is right there!› I could feel her teasing mirth.
"Oh, they can't possibly hold a candle to Beth's," Sedret teased, a smirk spreading across Beth’s face.
That left me speechless.
"Well, now that we’ve thoroughly embarrassed our hosts," Sedret said, "have you been keeping up with the human advancements in science?"
"Unfortunately, no," Taresh replied. "Sarah's parents hold deep religious beliefs and are generally opposed to scientific literature."
Sedret scoffed. "Ridiculous. Rejecting science for a primitive, non-evidenced worldview?" She took a bite of fried chicken. "Which reminds me," she said through her mouthful. "Did you hear about the human involuntary who tried to convert some of the Hork-Bajir?"
"What?" Taresh said incredulously. "How did that work out?"
"Poorly," Sedret said. "They're not really equipped to understand religious concepts more complex than their 'Father Deep, Mother Sky' nonsense, I think."
"I'm sure the inherent ridiculousness of human religion doesn't help," Taresh laughed.
‹Could you not mock my religion over dinner?› I asked. This had become a frequent bone of contention between us over the past week and a half.
‹Oh come, now,› Taresh condescended. ‹I am well aware that you don't actually believe that foolishness.›
‹I try to,› I said stubbornly.
Taresh rolled our eyes. "Sarah's getting offended, so perhaps we should change the subject. Were you asking about science for a specific reason?"
"I've been looking into human robotics, actually," Sedret said. "They've made huge strides lately. I would be surprised if they were more than a couple years off from an autonomous humanoid robot." She pulled a magazine out of her bag and slid it across the table to us.
Taresh skimmed the article with interest. Most of it was way beyond me, so I took control of our hand and mouth to keep eating.
‹Interesting.› Taresh said. ‹I wonder— damn it, Sarah.› She took control of our mouth back. "Interesting. I wonder what applications we could put their developments to."
Sedret glanced furtively to either side. "What are you saying?"
I could feel Taresh's apprehension, though I wasn't sure of the cause. She'd never discussed robots with me before. "Nothing, really," she lied. "But since all of human science will be put to the benefit of the Empire once we complete our takeover, I'm curious if anything will be useful to us."
"Ah," Sedret said. There was a hint of disappointment in her face, but at the time I assumed it related to her next sentence. "Well, I should be off. Beth's parents are expecting us. Thursday?"
"Thursday," Taresh confirmed.
Tuesday Night
‹So, what, do Yeerks not have religions?›
We were up far too late, but Taresh had been unresponsive for hours, apparently lost in thought about her conversation with Sedret earlier, and I was petulantly attempting to go without sleep so that she couldn't watch my dreams. I could feel myself drifting, which is why I'd struck up the conversation.
‹No, of course not,› Taresh replied distractedly.
‹What do you mean, "of course not"?›
Irritated, Taresh sighed aloud. ‹When the world seems as stacked against you as our homeworld did, you don't wonder to yourself who designed it for you. Even aside from that, we've always been experimenters and explorers. The deity hypothesis just doesn't have any real evidence in support of it. Then, of course, there was the fact that when someone finally did come and lift us to the skies, it was the Andalites, not a god.›
‹So Yeerks have never believed in God?›
‹Certainly not the Christian God, no,› she said. ‹Nor anything a human would recognize as a deity.› She paused in thought. ‹Many cycles ago, though, primitive Yeerks did practice a form of ancestor worship. It was probably a result of our reproductive method. When three Yeerks form a breeding triad, they undergo fission after exchanging genetic material, ceasing to exist as the new generation is born. As such, previous generations of Yeerks have always held a sort of fascination — one that apparently bordered on religion in the past.›
‹So you don't believe in anything?›
‹I believe that proper application of what your people call the scientific method is our best means of understanding the universe. I believe that the galaxy is a wondrous place, and I want to see as much of it as I can before I die.› She hesitated, and I could feel her reluctance to continue. ‹And I am beginning to believe that you are correct. That we are wrong to enslave unwilling sentient beings, especially when alternatives are within easy reach.›
‹The robots,› I realized.
‹They've been proposed in the past,› Taresh confirmed. ‹But supporting the use of nonsentient hosts is considered treason these days, especially now that we've found a Class 5 species. I can't decide if Sedret is actually sympathetic to such thoughts or if she was trying to make me expose myself as a traitor.›
‹She wouldn't do that,› I said.
‹I think you're blinded by your affection for Beth,› Taresh said, not unkindly. ‹I am fond of Sedret, but her friendliness may all be a facade. In the Empire you can never be sure who might actually be a spy for a Visser or even the Council.›
‹So you can't ever trust anyone?› I asked. ‹That sounds like a fun way to live.›
‹It is the only way we know,› she said. She rolled over and closed our eyes. ‹Get some sleep, Sarah. As long as I keep playing things safe, you need never worry about the political machinations of other Yeerks.›
‹Okay,› I said muzzily. I was starting to drift off to sleep. ‹I trust you.›
Her warmth in response guided me into my dreams.
September
I tried to close my ears to the suffering around me as Taresh and I waited for Beth to finish retrieving Sedret from the Pool. In vain, of course. Every shriek and cry and wail imprinted itself on my soul, as they always did. I no longer believed in God, but I still believed in hell, because I visited it every two days.
Taresh tried to soothe me, but there was nothing she could do to actually cut off the onslaught — it wouldn’t do for Sub-Visser 380 to be seen covering our ears or caught with our auditory nerves turned off. Neither would do good things for her reputation, nor mine as a model host.
‹What’s keeping her?› I mused anxiously, scanning the area near the piers, trying to avoid looking at the cages full of involuntary hosts.
‹Here,› Taresh said, directing our eyes to where Beth stood second in one of the lines.
‹I wish we could just meet them outside,› I said as a particularly loud sob echoed across the cavern.
‹I’ll talk to Sedret about it,› Taresh promised. ‹She’s sympathetic to the fact that you dislike the Pool area.›
‹Or she pretends to be,› I reminded her. As we watched the man in front of Beth walk away from the pier, my old Sharing mentor Cameron walked by — or maybe it was Alen, who knows — and raised a hand in greeting. Taresh waved back with a fake smile while I simmered with loathing.
‹Did you ever find out what he gets for it?› I asked.
‹What, for luring in new hosts?› Taresh asked. ‹The promise of power, most likely. "Stick with me, kid, you’ll go places." Voluntary hosts of Vissers are often granted generous perks.›
‹I really thought he cared about me.›
‹I’m sorry.›
Beth knelt down on the pier and lowered her head to the sludgy surface of the water.
Normally I didn’t enjoy watching even voluntary Controllers’ Yeerks returning, but although Taresh had relinquished control of our eyes again, I watched, transfixed, as Sedret wriggled into Beth’s ear. There was something almost beautiful about it. ‹Is that weird?›
‹What, finding this beautiful?› Taresh asked. ‹I don’t think so. Most of your own people might disagree. But most of your own people who know of us consider us parasites. And,› she admitted, ‹They’re not wrong. You’ve seen a gentler side of the Yeerks than most.›
‹All the same,› I said. ‹I could never think of you as a parasite. A quisling like Cameron is far more of a parasite than you are.›
Taresh smiled. ‹I appreciate that.›
Sedret wasn’t long in joining us. "Sorry for the delay," she said as we dropped into step beside her. "There was some drama in one of the involuntary cages that held me up."
I felt a pang in our chest. I wasn’t sure if it was mine or Taresh’s. Maybe both. "I understand," Taresh said. "Incidentally, I think I’ve mentioned before that Sarah dislikes the Pool area?"
"I’m so sorry, I had forgotten entirely," Sedret said, her eyes widening. "No wonder you always seem so tense in here. Let’s meet in the lounge going forward."
Taresh smiled. "Thank you. I thought you’d understand."
Sedret’s gaze flicked left and right. "If I’m honest," she said, lowering her voice slightly, "I understand better than you might think. I…" She paused, started to speak, paused again. "I regret that involuntary hosts are necessary."
"Mm," Taresh said. Our heart started to hammer. ‹I don’t like this,› she said privately.
‹It’s way too public in here,› I agreed. ‹Can you change the subj—›
That's when Visser Three arrived.
Taresh had explained to me once that the same telepathy that allowed Andalite thought-speech could also transmit emotions, in a way. Visser Three did this at all times. Nobody was really sure whether it was deliberate or something he had trouble controlling — or even whether it was his host's emotion or his own — but every time he walked in a room, you knew. An aura of hatred smothered the area.
All activity in the Pool stopped. All eyes turned to the Visser. Even the involuntaries had gone quiet and were watching him warily.
‹Bring me Falan Eight-Two-Four,› he said.
A shaking, pale human-controller was escorted to Visser Three. "Y-yes, Visser?"
‹You were the one who suggested the use of oatmeal as a Kandrona substitute, yes?› Visser Three asked, deadly calm.
"Visser, I can explain—"
‹Cease your prattle and answer the question.›
Falan steeled himself. "I did, Visser."
‹You were then allowed the opportunity to redeem yourself when you were placed in charge of the free will suppression project. Yes?›
"Yes, Visser," Falan said. Finally losing his nerve, he blurted, "But Visser, the Andalite bandits, they—"
‹BE! SILENT!› Visser Three roared. ‹I have seen your data! Your real data, not the doctored numbers your staff prepared for me!"
Falan stared in mute horror.
‹And I have seen your conclusions,› the Visser all but hissed. ‹You have failed. You could not do artificially what you have been designed to do by your very nature as a Yeerk. You could not suppress human free will.›
"Visser," Falan said desperately, "we could find no way to solve the problem of the ghost in the machine. If that could be over—"
‹Enough of your meaningless babble!› Visser Three said. ‹You have failed me! You will DIE!›
"Visser, please—"
The wicked Andalite tail blade struck faster than I could see. Falan's host was gutted like a fish.
I wanted to look away, but Taresh stared in transfixed horror. Falan's knees buckled. He watched numbly as his host's innards spilled from his torso.
‹Dispose of this,› Visser Three said, striding away.
One of the nearby Taxxons bumped us in its rush to get to the body. Taresh, jolted from her stupor, finally looked away.
The whole room had begun to vibrate, as though some massive machinery were at work. I wondered distantly if it was the Visser's ship departing. Taresh looked around. All of the other Controllers and hosts we could see looked as stunned as I felt. None of them seemed to notice the quaking of the room.
It wasn't until Sedret pulled us away into another room, sat us down, and asked quietly if we were both all right that I realized it wasn't the room shaking.
It was our body.
That Evening
By the time we got home, Taresh had managed to get our shaking under control. That didn't stop my mother noticing how pale and weak we looked.
"Straight to bed," she ordered. "Put a movie on and I'll be up soon with soup."
"Yes ma'am," Taresh said.
Taresh let me pick the movie and both of us slowly relaxed as we watched. As the end credits rolled, she commented, ‹Humans are obsessed with transience.›
‹What do you mean?›
‹Humans cannot get past the fact that all things eventually pass away,› she said. ‹It saturates your media. Your music, your films, your literature — all dominated by a fixation on the ephemerality of everything and desperate attempts to avert it.›
‹What's so weird about that?› I asked.
I could feel Taresh's awkwardness as she replied. ‹I can't really speak with any authority,› she said. ‹My only other host has been a Gedd, and they aren't exactly deep thinkers. But Yeerks are much more inclined to accept the inevitable.›
‹But that Controller at the Pool tonight tried to get Visser Three to spare his life,› I said, feeling a thrill of nausea as I remembered.
‹Well, yes, all species have some level of self-preservation instinct,› Taresh said, annoyed. ‹But you'll note that he remained in his dying host rather than making a break for the Pool. He knew he would never make it; either the Visser or the Taxxons would have seen to that. A human in the same situation would make the attempt every time.› She paused. ‹It's a very interesting trait of your species, actually. Such unbridled optimism. And yet such deep cynicism. "There are no happy endings because nothing ever ends." Denying the transience of the universe while accepting the transience of happiness. Bizarre.›
I gave the mental equivalent of a shrug. ‹I guess.›
We lay in silence for a while.
‹If Sedret is luring us into a trap...› I trailed off, unwilling to finish the thought.
‹Yes,› Taresh said. ‹Our fate will be the same as Falan's, should we be caught in it.›
I didn't want to think about that.
‹Go to sleep,› Taresh said gently. ‹I will shepherd your dreams. No nightmares of the Pool tonight.›
That night I dreamt of nothing but pleasant moments shared with Beth in a world at peace.
Early October
The shimmer of the early fall sunset reflecting off the ocean cast a warm glow over the beach. Most of the beachgoers had packed up for the day, although a few were taking advantage of the lingering warm weather to get in one more beach barbecue. There was a Sharing meeting later, further down the beach, but Taresh and I had met Sedret and Beth here early to hand out fliers. Sedret clearly had something on her mind, but for the moment we'd let that simmer in favor of actually behaving like teenage girls at the beach for once. Sharing business had taken up so much of our time over the summer that we'd hardly even had a chance to make a token attempt to maintain cover, but with school back in session, the Empire was demanding much less from the student Controllers.
At the moment we were lying on towels and watching the sun slip behind the waves. "I don't think I'll ever get tired of this sight," Taresh murmured.
"I know what you mean," Sedret said. "It's the sort of thing that gets you thinking."
"About what?" Taresh asked.
Sedret glanced around to make sure nobody was in earshot, then leaned in close. The sensation of having Beth's face so close to mine was intoxicating, even by proxy. "Do you really think it's right that we hijack the bodies of others to appreciate this beauty?"
Our heart was pounding, Taresh's fear — and attraction, I realized — mixing with my own. Was this the culmination of several months of baiting a trap, or were Sedret and Beth everything they seemed?
"This is treason," Taresh said, playing it safe, keeping her options open. "We could be sentenced to death by Kandrona starvation for even discussing this."
"It shouldn't be," Sedret insisted. "Not every host is as welcoming as Beth or Sarah. We have the capability to do better than enslave unwilling sentients, but the Council refuses to even consider the option."
"What would you suggest as an alternative?"
Sedret looked into our eyes, analyzing. "There's a group of Yeerks," she said at last. "They work with their hosts rather than against them. The more scientifically-inclined are working on the creation of non-sentient hosts, biological or otherwise. The rest help in whatever way they can — as informants, as suppliers, or even just as moral support. They call themselves the Yeerk Peace Movement."
"I've heard rumors," Taresh admitted, her tone carefully neutral. "Something about an Aftran Nine-Four-Two."
Sedret nodded. "The leader of the movement. She refuses to take a human host and hides within the Pool." She glanced around again, then back at us. "What do you think?"
‹I place the decision in your hands,› Taresh said to me. ‹If we do this, you will be in terrible danger. I don't wish to thrust that on you unwillingly.›
‹Do you think Sedret is being honest?› I asked. ‹Is she really on the level?›
‹I believe so, yes.›
‹I trust you, Taresh,› I said simply.
Taresh smiled. "I think I'd like to know more."
The words hung between us for a long heartbeat.
Sedret suddenly closed the inches between us. Her lips… Beth’s lips… their lips met mine — Taresh’s — ours. For a moment, Taresh and I both froze. Then we were kissing back, hard, the boundary between Yeerk and human lost in a gestalt outpouring of emotion.
After an eternity that was far too short, we broke apart. "Thank God," Beth and Sedret sighed in unison.
"We were afraid…" Taresh said, looking away.
"I know," Sedret said, lifting our chin to gaze in our eyes. Their face was bright red. "We were too."
"For several reasons," Beth added with a nervous giggle. I gave her a reassuring smile.
"I'll introduce you to Illim — Mr. Tidwell’s Yeerk — after the meeting," Sedret said. "He coordinates the student members of the Peace Movement."
Taresh nodded. For a moment, we all gazed into each others’ eyes quietly.
"So what happens now?" I wondered aloud.
"What, between us?" Sedret asked. I nodded.
"More of that later, I hope," Beth said with a grin.
The sun slipped at last behind the horizon, and we lay there for another few minutes, contemplating our now-uncertain futures.
November
I knelt on the pier over the Yeerk Pool, bending my head toward the water as the Hork-Bajir guards steadied me so I wouldn't fall in. I needed the help. Today was the day Aftran would be interrogated by Visser Three. My mind was roiling. What if she gave information on the Peace Movement? What if it was forced out of her? What if the Animorphs attacked while this was happening? What if, what if...
Taresh had planned with Sedret to meet in the Pool — where they could communicate more privately than at a Sharing meeting — and figure out some sort of plan. Illim was going to try to convince the Animorphs to intervene, but there was no guarantee they would be willing or even available. I was eagerly awaiting her report as she slithered through my ear canal and back onto my brain. The Hork-Bajir helped us to our feet and we stumbled slightly, as though Taresh had forgotten how to walk.
I felt cold fear clench in my stomach as old memories opened. Taresh didn't examine my memories without permission anymore. And the first thing she did on returning, every time, was to ask me if I’d missed her. This, then, wasn't Taresh. Taresh had been captured, and another Yeerk had been sent to mine my memories for evidence against her.
We were discovered.
I was getting nothing back from the Yeerk in my head. No emotions, no speech, nothing. It simply turned my eyes to where the Visser was standing further down the pier, surrounded by a crowd of Controllers of varied species. He held Aftran in his delicate Andalite hand.
‹You will tell me everything about the so-called Peace Movement,› the Visser spat in thought-speech so powerful it could probably be heard from orbit. ‹Then I'll have to use my imagination and come up with a nice, long, painful way for you to die.›
That's when the Yeerk acted, running towards the Visser as fast as my body could go. My mind seized with fear. My heart thudded to the rhythm of my footsteps on the metal pier. The Visser turned to look, but his shock combined with the Yeerk's head start allowed the Yeerk to slam into him, knocking him slightly off-balance. The Yeerk grabbed Aftran at the same time the Visser's hand closed more tightly on her body. Before I could process any of this, my mouth was biting Visser Three's slender Andalite wrist.
The Yeerk grabbed Aftran out of midair and dove into the Pool.
My mind spun with possibilities. Was this Yeerk with the Peace Movement? Then why hadn't it used its own host? Or if time were absolutely of the essence, why hadn't it explained itself? None of this made any sense.
Visser Three was barking out angry orders, but I was too confused to pay attention. At least, I was until two Taxxons slithered into the water and started chasing us. Dracon beams hit the water near us, evaporating some of the sludge as the Yeerk took in a breath and dove deeper into the pool. Yeerks burned and boiled as the beam weapons chased after us. I prayed — for the first time in months — that Taresh and Sedret weren’t among them.
A Taxxon caught hold of my ankle and I felt my heart sink. I would be murdered because of the Yeerk in my head. I'd known this was a possibility for months now, but death with Taresh held much less terror than death with a Yeerk I didn't know who'd hijacked my body.
Wait! The Yeerk was disengaging from my brain, slithering out into the relative safety of the Pool beyond. The Taxxon dragged me up, away from the Yeerk, towards the surface of the Pool. I broke the surface, gasping for air, and two heavyset Hork-Bajir — not the usual guards — hauled me onto the pier. One of them placed a wrist blade against my throat.
‹Nobody touch her!› Visser Three demanded. The Hork-Bajir's blade dropped away from me in a heartbeat. ‹I want the pleasure of killing her myself. After I find out everything that's in her pitiful excuse for a mind.›
"Visser, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry," I babbled as his stolen Andalite form drew nearer, tail blade raised. My heart hammered so hard I was sure it was visible through my shirt. "It wasn't me, it wasn't my usual Yeerk, I'm voluntary! We wouldn't betray you, Visser!"
The Visser focused all four eyes intently on my face. ‹This creature has no Yeerk!› he shouted.
"I went to the pier like I usually do, but it wasn't Taresh Five-Five-Eight, it was some—"
‹A second traitor! Some Yeerk used this host to... No!› He backed away from me, tail blade still held high, scanning the room with his main eyes while his stalk eyes swept around wildly. ‹The Andalites! They're here!›
A kind-looking human-Controller took my hand and gently pulled me off the pier. "Come to the infirmary," he said. "The Visser will want to interrogate you, but first we'll make sure you're okay."
I was shaking violently from the terror and adrenaline, but my mind was fixed on one thing. "Need Taresh," I mumbled through chattering teeth.
"We'll make sure to return you to your Yeerk before the interrogation," the man said, pulling me away from the Pool. "It will make things more expedient for the Visser."
"'Kay," I managed, finally willingly following him to the infirmary. Chaos exploded in the main Pool area, but I huddled in a corner and cried until the noise died down and Taresh was finally brought to me.
April
"I've recently heard some unsettling things through the Movement's scientists," Sedret murmured.
"Oh?"
She glanced around. We were sitting in a secluded corner of the cafeteria before school began. There was little chance of anybody wandering near us without our noticing, but paranoia was what kept us all alive these days.
"Apparently there's a human scientific establishment discovering the basic principles of hypermathematics as we speak."
I could feel Taresh's shock radiating through my mind. It was gibberish to me, but clearly this was significant.
"What are hypermathematics?" I asked.
"They'd be far beyond you or Beth," Sedret said. "There's no simple way to describe the field."
"The important thing, though," Taresh said with a significant glance at Sedret, "is that hypermathematics is the theoretical underpinning necessary to comprehend Zero Space."
"That sort of hyperspace the Empire uses?" Beth asked.
"To put it simply, yes," Taresh said. "It makes interstellar communication nearly instantaneous, and greatly reduces travel time. A voyage that in realspace would take centuries at lightspeed could only take a couple of months in z-space."
"What does that mean for us?" I asked.
"Well," Sedret said, "all of our communications, and the Andalites', are made with z-space transmitters. If the humans invent a receiver, even just the ambient noise from our transmissions will alert them that something major is going on."
Beth caught on quicker than I did. "So this discovery will have to be kept under wraps, and the only way of doing that..."
"Is to infest the engineers, yes," Taresh said.
"In fact," Sedret said, "my contact suspected that one or two of the people working on the project might already be infested. Not enough to ruin the project's chance of success, but enough to get the rest of them when they discover z-space. And," she added, "one of the engineers is Visser One’s host’s former husband."
"We need to warn the Animorphs," I said, eyeing Chapman, who'd just walked in, nervously. He wasn't supposed to be here at the high school, and he was heading toward us with purpose.
"We can't," Sedret said. "I don't know who they are. And the Visser still suspects that Illim was the one to invite the Council Inspector a few months ago, so I don't dare approach him. And I believe Kevin Jacobs may be ready for initiation," she continued as Chapman entered earshot.
"Sub-Vissers," he said quietly. "Word has just come in that Visser One's mission in the Anati system has failed. She is to be executed, and Visser Three will be elevated to her rank. I must leave at once to help lay the groundwork for his first major project, Operation 9466. My replacement at the middle school is not one of ours, and so it falls to both of you to coordinate the student Controllers." He gave a rare smile. "Although, if all goes well, that will not be necessary for much longer." He patted us on the shoulders paternally, then turned and headed back to the door.
His arrival and departure didn't spark much interest in the other students. Because we liaised with him for Empire business, we were well-known among the student body for being two of his favorite former students. Our reaction, on the other hand, wasn't nearly so unconcerned.
"Visser Three as Visser One?" I couldn't tell if the horrified whisper was from Sedret or Beth.
"Open warfare," Taresh said, just as shaken as they sounded. "What do we do?"
"We need to prepare for open opposition," Sedret said. "Nothing overt, not yet. But when the moment is right, the Movement needs to be ready to act. Otherwise..."
Otherwise didn't bear thinking about.
June
Taresh and I held Beth and Sedret close, enjoying the warm sensation of their skin against ours. They nuzzled their head under our chin as we stroked a hand gently down their back. "That was nice," Taresh murmured.
"Yeah," Beth said. She looked up at us and smiled. "Happy birthday, Sarah."
I kissed them gently on the forehead. "Let's do it again."
That plan was stymied when the phone next to their bed began to ring. Groaning, Beth and Sedret rolled over and grabbed it. "Hello?"
I could hear Tidwell's voice coming through the receiver, but not clearly enough to make out words. I could tell from the sudden tension in Beth and Sedret’s body, though, that it was nothing good.
"I'll let them know," Sedret said. "We'll meet you at the lake."
She hung up the phone. "That was Illim," she said, rolling to face us again. "Visser One has issued orders instructing everybody to begin preparations for open warfare."
"What?" Taresh demanded. "I thought for sure after the failure of Operation 9466 and the Visser's inability to destroy the free Hork-Bajir—"
"Only setbacks, according to him," Sedret said bitterly. She and Beth sat up and started grabbing their clothes from next to the bed. "Especially," she continued, "because he's finally apparently figured it out."
"Figured what out?" Taresh asked as we started hunting for our own clothes.
I was slightly faster on the uptake, for once. "They know the Animorphs are human?"
"Precisely," Sedret said. "Illim said the Sharing is running a blood drive at the lake. They're going to try to match DNA to blood that was left behind by the Animorphs in battle."
"Once they've made the matches..." Taresh trailed off in horror.
"Open war," Beth said grimly, pulling on their shirt. "They'll sweep in, kill the Animorphs, and that's it for Earth."
"We've got to do something," I said.
"We'll meet with Illim and see what we can do," Sedret said. She and Beth headed for the door with Taresh and me close behind. "I wish we could contact the Animorphs directly."
"We know they have their own intelligence sources," Taresh reassured her. "They probably know already."
"Mm," Sedret said, worry still evident in her voice.
Illim was pacing impatiently near the picnic area when we arrived at the lake. "Things are moving," he said without preamble. "Visser One has big plans. First a large-scale operation to infest the state National Guard, then moving on to the government, and finally opening direct train lines to the Pool throughout the city. Then the mass infestations begin and the open invasion can begin in earnest."
The four of us looked at each other in horror. "What can we do?" Taresh whispered.
"Nothing, for now," Illim said. Seeing our stricken expressions, he gave a grim smile. "Only for now. We’re massing resources for an attack on the Pool complex."
"When?" Sedret demanded.
"The timetable is loose," Illim said. "It depends on how fast Visser One can bring his plan to fruition."
Taresh and I looked at Beth and Sedret. They nodded. "We’ll be ready," Taresh said.
September
Taresh and I stood in the main area of the Pool, watching Hork-Bajir-Controllers herded frightened people off packed trains toward the piers. The caged hosts were quieter than usual, transfixed in horror at the spectacle. Instead of the usual moans and shrieks, the Pool was suffused with the susurrations of their terrified whispers.
And for once, the sounds of the Pool didn't fill me with guilt for my complicity in the affair. Today we would act.
‹There,› Taresh said, looking at the Hork-Bajir guarding one of the cages. ‹That's one of my poolmates. I'll distract him.› I gave the mental equivalent of a nod and Taresh walked over to the guard.
"Taresh-Two-Five-Two?!" Taresh said with exaggerated delight. "Is that you? It's been so long, how have you been doing?"
"Five-Five-Eight?" the guard grunted. He said something to her in Galard and Taresh responded in kind.
I had to be very careful. Taresh had control of our eyes, so there was no risk of my drawing attention with them, but I had to work out of our very peripheral vision. There. Hanging off the belt, I thought. ‹Taresh, go.› Taresh leaned in to mutter something to the guard. As our shoulder touched his side, I brushed our hand against the belt lightly, our dextrous fingers retrieving our goal: the keys that would unlock the host cages.
Now it was time to get out of the way of the initial attack. Taresh leaned back from the guard and made what sounded like a lame excuse even to my uncomprehending ears, motoring her way toward the exit to the rest of the complex, our heart pounding. With an effort, I slowed us down. ‹Don't look suspicious!› I hissed.
‹Sorry,› Taresh said. ‹You know I'm worse at this than you.›
We felt the key in our pocket. To my surprise, it wasn't an alien design, but one of the circular keys they use on vending machines.
‹Why overcomplicate things?› Taresh explained. ‹Mechanical locks can't be turned off or overridden remotely, and the tubular lock is a secure enough design to keep most humans from picking it.›
We reached for the corridor door handle.
Behind us, there was an almighty roaring crash that shook the cavern. Someone opened the door as we went sprawling and it hit our head hard. Reeling and disoriented, we spun around to see the most surreal thing I have ever witnessed.
One of the trains — seemingly an incomplete line that had not yet reached the complex — had erupted through the wall, launching straight into the Pool. Dead Yeerks were smashed all over the train and bobbing in the water. Everyone rushed toward the Pool in a cacophony of screams and shouts. The pit dropped out of our stomach.
"Sedret…" Taresh whispered. Her horror snapped me out of my daze.
‹She wasn't in there,› I said. ‹I know she wasn't. Come on, Taresh, get it together.›
Silence — Taresh had given up. It was up to me.
I shook off our dizziness and scanned the crush of Controllers trying to get to the Pool. It was no use. If Beth and Sedret were among them, I would never spot them. I eyed the door, but decided the attack would almost certainly be called off. Best to get supplies to help tend the wounded. I sprinted toward the first aid shed.
‹Thanks for all the exercise,› I said. ‹It's coming in handy.›
No response.
I was nearly to the shed when I heard the riotous clamor behind me die down completely. My blood ran cold. Was the Visser here?
I turned to see an Andalite — my heart stopped for a moment until I realized it was the Animorphs' Aximili — standing behind the crowd around the pool. Standing on top of the train were a gorilla who was becoming less man by the moment and a girl around my age — Cassie.
I shuddered. Eventually Illim had told me the truth of what had happened the day of Aftran's trial. Even understanding why she'd done what she'd done, I couldn't help but hate Cassie a little.
"There are ten one-thousand-pound bombs on this train!" Cassie shouted, her voice echoing in the now quiet chamber. "They're going to go off in four minutes from now! You have four minutes to evacuate! Anyone still here in four minutes is dead!"
Well. That's one way to provoke a calm and orderly evacuation.
There were a surprising number of rebel spies in the pool today, I noted distantly as I pressed my back against the shed, trying not to be trampled by the rush. Somewhere around a tenth of the Controllers present took to animal form, trying to outrace death with the Andalites' stolen gift.
As the throng converged on the exits and away from the main pool area, Aximili began opening the cages and restraints with his wicked tail blade, allowing the gorilla to help the prisoners out to freedom. Cassie directed them to the exits, exhorting them to hurry.
Then, suddenly, running toward the cages, I saw her.
"Beth!" I screamed. I don't recall closing the distance between us. Suddenly she was in my arms and I was in her arms and… "Sedret?" I asked breathlessly?
"I'm in here," Sedret said.
In my head, Taresh let out a strangled cry. As one, we grabbed their face and kissed them deeply, not caring who saw.
I reluctantly broke the connection. "We've got work to do," I said, giving Beth and Sedret one of the two keys from the ring I'd pilfered.
"Right," Beth said. Sedret nodded.
We split up, running to unlock cages ahead of Aximili to speed up his work. I saw the Andalite's stalk eyes focus toward the Pool. Following his gaze, we saw the gorilla struggling to tear open one of the cages. Taresh and I hurried over and gently put a hand on his huge bicep. "Allow us," I said as we unlocked the cage.
‹Us, huh?› I didn't know gorillas could make a skeptical face.
I smiled. "They're not all bad."
That's when Visser One arrived.
A gigantic cephalopoid alien, twenty-eyed and twenty-tentacled, rose menacingly from the pool. He turned his monstrous, cthonic gaze on the gorilla.
‹Get your girl and get out of here,› the gorilla said privately. ‹He's not going to be happy with you.›
We didn't need telling twice. Dashing for where Sedret and Beth stood frozen in fear, we grabbed their hand and raced for the least crowded exit, ignoring the Visser's braggadocio.
After the War
"We made it out," I said, "but I'm not going to relive that a second time tonight." I drained my coffee mug and glanced at the clock. 4:33. Just enough time to wrap this up before Beth woke up. "So that's the story," I said. "I've read articles calling it Stockholm Syndrome and lots of people accusing Taresh and Sedret of manipulating us for their own ends, but that's really not it at all."
Marco sat up in the loveseat. "But wouldn't you rather be free?" he asked. The frustration in his voice matched what I was feeling.
"I was free," I insisted. "We shared control of my body, and it was with my permission that Taresh used it. I was her host, but only in the sense that she was my invited guest."
"And the lack of privacy never bugged you?"
I sighed. "I was just glad to have a friend who understood me completely. And after the first few months I had full control over what Taresh could see in my mind."
"Control she could have taken away any time," Marco pointed out.
"But she didn't," I said. "I trusted her not to, and she didn't betray that trust."
I put my cup on the coffee table and sat back. "Listen, when my parents found out I'd had an alien in my head they were very sympathetic. When they found out I was dating another girl, they kicked me out of the house. Even at the start, Taresh didn't care about it, and now... well, it's more complicated now. But in a good way."
"If you say so," Marco said, rolling his eyes. He swung a leg up on the loveseat beside him and took on a pensive expression. We were both silent for a few minutes while he finished his coffee.
"So you'd rather live the rest of your life with a Yeerk?" he said at last.
"And so would Beth," I said. "I agreed to this six-month trial period alone to prove this isn't all Taresh's doing, but it's agonizing. I have nightmares about that last day at the Pool every night. You were there. You saw the people who were trampled." I sighed. "I feel so empty without her."
Marco sighed as well and stood up. "Like I said, I don't think I should have any say in this," he said, putting his mug down next to mine. "And I still think the whole situation is messed up. But I believe you, and I'll tell the adjudicators that much."
I closed my eyes and smiled. "Thank you."
When I opened them again, he was gone.