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His grandmother had a property outside town. A small but cozy building that belonged to her family; where the first floor acted as the administration of the place, and the following three floors were the apartments that she rented.
He liked to spend his vacations at that place, not just to take a break from the tiredness of college but also to walk away from the noisy capital and rest in what had been his hometown. Seongnam was not a ‘town’ itself but it was quieter than the busy Seoul, so he enjoyed his time there a lot, helping his grandma in what he could and visiting all the places that he knew from his childhood. Although on this occasion he felt something different when he said goodbye to his mother on the phone and hopped in the train. Like a feeling of anticipation, something small but significant in the bottom of his chest; he supposed it was the excitement of seeing his grandma again and spending a good time in the residence, but one never knows what might happen.
He wake up just a few minutes before the train arrived at the station, he pulled his airpods off and rushed to put on his sweater that he previously took off, Seongnam was known for being one of the coldest places during winter, and even though he liked the season he hated being sick and have to be taking medicine.
He hopped off quickly and while he was tapping something on his phone a person collided with him causing his step to suddenly destabilize; he looked back to face the clumsy culprit but he just got to see a boy on a beret running far away. He chose to play no mind anymore, whatever, then he adjusted his backpack and his luggage to start his way to his deliverance.
The moment he opened the door a homey and familiar scent filled him, he felt a sort of nostalgia mixed with happiness, memories from his childhood hitting him fast. He loved to come to his grandma’s residence exactly in the cold months, when he felt that kind of calm aura that December brings with it along with the warm colors and a good cup of coffee next to the lit fireplace.
An unconscious smile appeared on his face, coming to the lit fireplace of the main stance made his cheeks appear even more pink than they already were because of the cold outside. He looked between the furniture and then at the counter but there was no sign of the old woman. He decided to head down the hallway that led to the stairs, while he was at it he saw the old woman coming down the stairs with some white sheets on her hands, at the moment he saw her he ran towards her and wrapped her with his long arms.
“Yeonjun you finally arrived! Why didn’t you tell me you were in town already?”
“I wanted it to be a surprise.” His smile grows bigger when he makes space between them and looks at her. That woman was like his second mother, she was always there for him when he needed her.
“I looked for you at the reception and I didn’t find you, for a moment I thought you wouldn’t be here.”
“Oh, that’s because I was preparing room eight from the third floor, a guest is coming at any moment now.”
They kept walking until they sat on the couches next to the fireplace. Yeonjun put his luggage next to him on the floor and focused on enjoying the warmth of the place with the presence of his grandmother.
“How was the trip, sweetheart?”
“Quiet, I slept half of it.” He said with a big smile.
“I’m glad you got to rest, how about you go and put your things in your room meanwhile I get you some of the cookies I baked this morning?”
“I’d love that. I’ll be right back.” His smile got bigger. After that he got up and picked up his things to head to the second floor.
He opened the dark wooden door that had the golden ‘14’ on it. That room was the one that he always used when he came to stay here, and his grandma always reserved that room for him because between the two of them, that room was already his. He used to leave behind some of his stuff in it, like some pair of shoes or one or two books where he writes. After opening the door with its key, he walked inside with calm steps, the wood grinding softly under his feet while he walked touching the upholstered walls. He threw himself backwards on the comfy one-sized bed, taking off his glasses and throwing them somewhere on the bed as he closed his eyes and sighed calmly. He felt like somehow those exact vacations were going to be significant.
Just when he was starting to feel the sleepiness taking over him, his grandmother knocked softly at his door.
“Jjunie, sweetheart, coffee’s ready,” her voice came muffled thanks to the door between them but he heard her just fine.
“Welcome darling, make yourself at home,” he heard from behind the door, along with a ‘Thank you so much’ that obviously didn’t come from the old woman.
He lazily stood up and took his glasses, he put them on again and walked to the door to follow his grandma to the main stance. Just when he was crossing the door, the grinding of the wook made him look up to the stairs that leaded to the third floor, although he just barely saw a pair of black shiny shoes.
Two hours and a half later went by so quickly, time in which both relatives caught up with the other’s lives. Yeonjun told his grandmother how well he was doing at college. Even though he liked architecture sometimes it overwhelmed him so much, all those subjects that required the 110% of his brain, all the nights staying awake in where only his cup of coffee made him company, taking into account that he loved to sleep; spending more hours than necessary at the library and the trips to more rural places to appreciate the ancient korean architecture, adding to all that that he lived alone in Seoul and he barely managed with money to survive. Maybe that’s why he appreciated more the seasons when he came to stay with his grandmother.
The old woman told him that despite the place, it had good tenants at all times of the year; they would rent her a room for a couple of weeks, sometimes just weekends or other times they would stay more time. She told him that there were times where they would rent even three rooms at the same time, those foreign families that came mostly for tourism and to enjoy the mountains. Her grandma’s building wasn’t that big nor fancy and even less modern — considering its decades of built, but it had that power of making you feel at home, every corner of the place felt homelike. The colors, shades, the wooden floor and even the curtains, perhaps that’s why the people kept coming.
Yeonjun took his camera to take advantage of what was left of the afternoon to go and take some shoots at the park and maybe stay a while to get to watch the sunset. He said goodbye to his grandma and with his camera dangling on his neck he left. The neighborhood was quiet, but there started to be more people when he was getting closer to the city center. He took some snaps at the flora that he was finding, he also took pictures of some roofs and old houses. As time passed, the cold also became more present, so before stopping at a park he went to a store to buy a precious Americano to take away the cold a little.
Sitting on a bench he saw the steam coming out his mouth and from his beverage, he was drinking it calmly all the while in front of him the sun was slowly hiding behind the mountains. Tones of orange contrasting with intense violet made its presence in the sky and he thought that there would not be a more beautiful shot than that.
He put his paper cup on the bench and just when he was aiming the lens to the horizon something blocked entirely his vision. Confused and a bit upset for losing a great picture, he raised the lens upwards and what his eyes captured left him motionless for a microsecond.
Suddenly a pair of pink and shiny lips caught his attention, followed by dark eyes but, captivating was the word? He had to dry swallow when he put his camera down and saw that visual spectacle entirely. It took him a second to recollect himself and put on his ‘upset’ facade, driven by the fact that now the sky was dark, his coffee getting cold and on his reel there was not a photograph of the sky, but a close-up shot of that nosy boy's face.
“Thank you stranger, you just made me lose a chance of a great photo.”
“Oh, I’m so sorry,” he shamelessly got closer and sat next to his coffee. “I was so busy all day. I almost lost the train to get here and I had to go to my lodging on time to after that send some papers and I didn’t realize that I interposed in your perfect shot or whatever it was,” he sighed tired.
Yeonjun thought that he talked a lot, and also that he had pretty eyes.
“You aren’t from here?”
“Oh, no. That’s actually a funny story. I’m here for the holidays. Kai, nice to meet you,” he said and stretched his lips into a warm smile despite the weather and did a small bow.
“Uhm, Yeonjun,” he copied the action.
“So, you like taking photos.,,”
“Yeah, it’s a good hobby.”
If Yeonjun was given the choice between going to his grandmother's hotel and warming his frozen toes or staying to stare at the extravagant stranger who gave him the impression that he had seen him before, he would definitely choose the second option.
“You’re right, I have a couple of friends that like it too, I prefer singing though.”
“Singing is your hobby?”
“Well, more than a hobby is like my frustrated dream,” he giggled. “I would like to really dedicate myself to it instead of just calling it a hobby.”
To be honest, Yeonjun was amazed. To this point his coffee was completely forgotten and so it was his camera; although the cold it still didn't go into the background.
What was the chance that a boy like that was speaking so friendly to a stranger, him to be specific? He normally wasn't a person who interacted much with others, he had a really small circle of friends and he didn't really pay attention to other people because he didn't feel like it that way. But, there was something about this blonde boy in a beret who kept talking to him about something while the mist came out of his mouth and was lost in the winter air of that park. He felt something… in the pit of his stomach.
Half an hour had passed while those two strangers talked like they knew each other in another life or something. It seemed like words came out easier for Yeonjun, even if he didn’t say much about himself, he contributed a lot to the conversation, but he preferred to listen attentively to what the other had to say; nothing profound from anyone, but at the same time really interesting to the point of losing track of time for a while.
“Damn, it’s pretty late. I have to go,” he barely stood up, feeling how his feet recovered from numbness while he moved them.
“Right, I have to go too. Sorry for making you stay here all that time,” the blonde boy said a bit embarrassed.
“No problem, if I didn’t want to I wouldn’t have stayed,” he looked down shyly. “Well, bye…” He turned to leave before he said something stupid but was suddenly surprised. Kai is walking behind him.
“Sorry, this is my way too.”
Another… coincidence?
It was quite surprising for Yeonjun that the boy's destiny was on the same route, but even more surprising was learning that Kai was staying at his grandmother's building. At first he didn't believe him and thought it was a joke but in reality that didn't make much sense; to begin with, he didn't tell him that his grandmother had a small apartment building, much less he told him where it was, so he was really surprised to the point of being a little scared.
The road was pleasant for both of them, but there was something more in Yeonjun; a certain tinge of nervousness that he had never felt before was bubbling deep in his chest. He was holding the strap of his camera with one hand but he was afraid that it would fall at any moment thanks to how sweaty his palms were.
When they arrived at the building, the old woman greeted them, being a little surprised to see them arrive together and asking them if they had known each other before. They sat in the main room, with some hot chocolate that the woman had brought for them and the few people who were also hanging out in the room. The old woman smiled with joy when she knew that they had met that same afternoon by chance and that they discovered that they were staying in the same place. “Well, it's not all a coincidence,” the woman had told them that night.
The sun had risen again, and Yeonjun had taken the opportunity to sleep late, waking up to the smell of the food his grandmother was preparing in the kitchen on the first floor. He greeted the few people in the kitchen and walked over to one of the bars to sit and wait for his grandmother to finish cooking to eat breakfast.
“Oh… Hueningie is such a cute boy. Out of all my regular tenants I have, he is the kindest and friendliest of all,” said the old woman, moving what she had in the pan.
“He's so organized and polite, plus the poor guy is always busy with so many papers and things he has to do,” and Yeonjun didn't understand why she was telling him all that.
“Grandma, why-”
“Now that you’re friends I hope you get some of his enthusiasm,” she said with a smile like it was nothing.
So that’s what all this is about.
“But we aren’t-”
“Ah, and today the poor boy had to leave the building so early,” she scrunched her face with worry. “I hope he had a good breakfast. Breakfast is the most important meal of the day.”
Something clicked in Yeonjun’s mind.
“Wait. Did you say ‘regular tenant’?”
“Oh, yes. Hueningie comes to stay here every year. He always rents the same room.”
“If he comes every year… How come I’ve never seen him before?” It was as if he was thinking out loud.
“Well that’s a question you have to ask to yourself, honey. Some things are meant to happen at the right moment.”
“What-”
“Here you go.”
His grandma cut him off like she has been doing since he came to the kitchen and placed the plate in front of him. “Make sure you eat all of it. Maybe when Hueningie returns you two could go and hang out somewhere.”
“Why would I-”
“Eat well, honey,” said the old woman stretching the word before she disappeared in the hallway that led to the rooms.
Well, now more than ever he could affirm that his grandmother was beyond insane. But on balance, spending the afternoon walking around with Kai wasn't such a crazy idea if he thought about it a little more.
After having to avoid his grandmother for a while so that she wouldn't bombard him with strange conversations about something related to Kai, he was able to hide in his room for a long time; reviewing the photos he had taken the day before, going over some plans on the structures of some roofs that had caught his attention. That is until he reached the end of his reel and found the photo he had accidentally taken of Kai when he got in his lens.
He really couldn't ignore the fact that something inside him told him that he had seen him before, Yeonjun wanted to laugh at himself, that couldn't sound more absurd. That time in the park was the first time he had seen him, because he certainly couldn't forget having seen someone like him. His chest hurt again every time his mind projected the image of that boy. It seemed like one of those old black and white movies without voice that only shows certain short shots, Yeonjun wishes his mind worked that way when doing his college homework.
He was starting to feel overwhelmed, so he quickly grabbed his camera and left the room as quickly as he could, getting some fresh air wouldn't hurt him at all. The bad thing happened when he went down the stairs, Kai's face welcomed him, the air got stuck in his throat and he really didn't know why he was behaving like that.
“Hey,” that smile that he was offering him caught his attention entirely.
“What’s up,” he was as calm as he could act and he felt proud of it. “You've just arrived?” Well that did sound silly considering that he hadn't been at the residence all morning.
"Yeah, I had to leave a little early this morning," he said with a- shy smile? “Were you about to go out?”
“Uh yeah. I was about to go get some fresh air, I was going crazy up there." He held the camera better because his hands were playing against it again.
“Ah, I see…”
“Would you- would you like to come?”
What.
“Uhm.”
“Well, only if you want to and don’t feel too tired. You must have been busy all day and I understand if you-”
“Sure! I’d love to. I’m just gonna go put this in my room and I’ll be right back.” said the boy with that beautiful smile of his and disappeared into the stairs.
“It’s a good start ,” said his grandmother who passed by him as if nothing had happened and disappeared down a hallway.
Even though the sky was cloudy and it was a little colder than yesterday, the afternoon was being pleasant for the pair of boys who were walking along one of the many streets of the city. At first it had been a little difficult for Yeonjun to function normally, but from one moment to the next the discomfort ceased to exist and he began to truly feel comfortable with the blonde's company.
Neither of them had seen the other before , they had no friends in common, and they didn't come from the same place either. Their tastes were very different, not to mention their personalities.
Although snowflakes seem the same at first glance, none of them are the same, each one is unique in its kind and with its own details that make them different from the others; but still they all fulfill the same function, covering the crowns of the trees, filling the fields and all the roofs of the cities when winter is at its peak and the thermometer shows degrees below zero.
Kai and Yeonjun were different, but deep down they felt that this was how it should be.
Complements come together best when one side gives the other that something it lacks; When there is something that you don't have, the other side will give you perhaps not exactly what you want, but rather what you need. Complements are made to be searched, found and joined together to provide everything that they didn't know they needed but that deep down they were looking for without control and they don't find it until the other half appears. A truly divine serendipity.
Yeonjun and Hueningkai had never seen each other according to their memories. They don't recognize their looks. Nor do they remember the natural essences that the other's body clearly gives off. Nor do they recognize the laughter they let out every time they get together to hang out. The way time flies every time they go out as they had already done; They do not recognize the routes they had not taken together, until now that they go out for a walk every afternoon and return when the sky is dark; and Yeonjun's grandmother is waiting for them sitting in the usual chair next to the lit fireplace with what some nights is hot chocolate and other nights is black coffee.
Their memories don't recognize it because they have never really seen each other , but the heart is something completely different. Because the heart pumps uncontrollably every time his hands accidentally touch each other, burning deep inside his chest because that touch has been recognized and missed too much by the recipient. Because the heart beats strongly every time their gazes are dedicated to the other.
Their memories didn't recognize it, but the simple fact of sharing the same space meant that their hearts could be at peace once again now that they knew they had found themselves after so long.
Yeonjun was never a fan of physical contact, but there was something relaxing about the way Kai laid him on his lap and played with his hair while telling him about another of the many fights he had with his father; when he told him that the man put more pressure on him those times when he slipped a comment about singing, that he filled his email with work to do when the man found him watching some vocal class video on the office computer; those days when he came to the residence to lock himself in his room wanting to disappear but then Yeonjun would come and mess up his hair as if he were a little child and then they would lie in bed looking at the ceiling without saying anything but with the certainty that they were there for each other.
Because although the heart sometimes despaired, it also enjoyed that feeling of peace that came when they were in each other's company; because Yeonjun had once read that when you found your other half your heart could make a revolution, but at the same time you could have that certainty of internal and comforting peace. Because when you find that someone the only thing they bring is tranquility to your hectic world that goes around but only stops when you look the right person in the eyes.
Yeonjun couldn't, or rather didn't want to count how many days had passed, but now they were on Christmas Eve. Everything was covered in snow that contrasted perfectly with the Christmas lights that decorated the houses and premises. The day lasted little and the night prevailed for longer, but Yeonjun couldn't believe that since being in Kai's company time always flew by.
Just one day before Christmas they were in the downtown library. It might not seem like an interesting scenario, especially considering the date, but they were more than comfortable where they were. Kai was sitting at one of the tables reading a book while Yeonjun was asking for help finding a really old book about architecture and artistic drawing. They told him that since it was a fairly old volume, it was in the last hallway near the cellar. With Kai’s company he went there and they both calmly began to look for it. Yeonjun was scanning the titles until Kai caught his attention.
“Did you find it?”
“No. But I found something better.” Yeonjun rolled his eyes at that comment. “Don’t make that face and come see this.”
The older boy came closer to see what it was that Kai found and he saw a wooden box that looked quite old and outdated.
“Let’s see what’s inside.”
“Kai, I don’t think that-”
His words were cut off when the sound of the rusty old lock being opened caught his attention and Kai had that mischievous smile on his face.
“What the- Kai, we can't do this. They could sue us.”
He rolled his eyes again when he saw that the blonde boy completely ignored what he was telling him and with a surprised face sniffed around the inside of the box.
Yeonjun snorted, and since cats are curious, he ended up sitting on the floor next to him to see the contents of the damn box.
Well, at first glance there was nothing interesting, only papers that due to time were now a light brown color, photographs of completely unknown people, letters with recipients lost in time, folders, and more papers. It wasn't until Kai dug deeper that he found something that caught both of their attention.
It was an envelope with the initials “CYJ - KKH”. Call them crazy, but of course those were their names, right? They looked at each other with their hearts inevitably beating uncontrollably, scared but excited about what that envelope could contain. They gave each other one last look and then Kai proceeded to open the envelope with extreme care, as if it were something truly sacred.
And as if it were predicted that precisely that day those two boys would meet in that library to search precisely in the less traveled section, and it was predicted that they would find that old wooden box with that time-worn envelope, just so it happened.
Inside there was a black and white photograph showing two young men staring at each other as if nothing else existed around them. They desperately wanted to know what year that photograph was taken but judging by the clothes they were wearing, they could tell that it was a long, long time ago.
And the most shocking thing was not the fact that the two people in the photo looked at each other as if they were completely lost in each other, nor the fact that judging by the time, their connection was clearly not allowed by society. Those points went completely unnoticed, what really shocked them to the point of losing their breath was the fact that the two young men who appeared in the photo looked exactly like the two of them.
If it weren't for the fact that they had known each other for just over a month, and that they had found that photograph in an old box hidden in the most recesses of the library, they could say with genuine certainty that it was the two of them.
On one side of the photograph was a really worn piece of paper, stained with a thin ink that was almost disappearing.
"You know it; I know it. But they must never know.
In this life and in any other. It's not a coincidence.
It will always be you".
A silent tear fell from Kai's beautiful eyes, dissolving into the calligraphy. Now more than ever their hearts were beating harder, but like any other day they were together, the feeling of warmth and peace predominated above all. As if after so much sacrifice and pain emanating from another pair of condemned souls , it finally disappeared. Finally, a feeling of uncertainty that they didn't know they had been feeling until today disappeared. An incomparable feeling of longing along with nostalgia and certainty of the other's name. As if their souls could finally be at peace as it felt the warmth of its lost other half next to it. Hueningkai and Yeonjun looked into each other's wet eyes, and for the first time, with a different but familiar glint in them.
It was at that moment that Yeonjun understood why, even before leaving home, he felt a different way in his chest. He then remembered his grandmother's words.
“Well, not everything is a coincidence.”
“Some things are just meant to happen at the right time.”
"It's a good start".
Neither of them had really seen each other before. But this was beyond his memories. It was their souls that connected them, that made them be at peace and have the feeling that they had seen each other before although in reality they had not.
At least not in this life.
It was their souls that had wandered for so long looking for their other half until they finally met at the right moment for both of them.
At last they were where they should be, where they were, and where they would be today, tomorrow, and in the next life if necessary to continue with a love that began a long time ago, but that is far from ending here.
"You know it; I know it. But they must never know. In this life and in any other. It's not a coincidence. You will always be you".
It will always be you. Anywhere, everywhere...