Work Text:
Cloud sat on the couch, trying to focus on the tv. But, he just couldn't. Lately, it's been hard to focus with everything that's been going on.
Aerith was just about to enter her third trimester of pregnancy, meaning soon, the baby would be due any day now. Only a month from today, they'd be able to hold their son in their arms. To fawn over him, shower him with affection, be there for him.
It was fucking terrifying.
Cloud didn't know one thing about being a father. How can he be a good father, when he himself didn't have his own?
Cloud's father left sometime before he was even two years old. Just straight up abandoned his family, leaving Claudia to raise Cloud all by herself. It greatly hurt her, but she pushed through, like the tough woman she always was. Cloud never wanted to be like him, leaving his family behind for selfish desires. The very thought of it made him sick to his stomach.
But without a father figure to raise him, Cloud had doubts about himself. What if his son grew to hate him? What if he wasn't there enough? Would he even know how to parent correctly? Was there even a correct way to parent a child?
Cloud was snapped out of his thoughts when Barret entered the house, carrying a gift bag. Clearly for the baby, as evidenced by its baby blue color, rattles, and chocobo chicks in diapers scattered all over it.
"Hey, spiky!" He grinned, setting the bag down. "I got ya and Aerith some stuff for the baby."
"Right, hey, Barret..." Cloud mumbles, standing up. "Thanks, we appreciate it."
Barret removed his sunglasses, settling them atop his head. "You're welcome, man! Anything to help." He noticed Cloud's slightly paler face, and raised an eyebrow. "You alright??"
"I'm fine," he lied. But of course, this lie was seen right through.
"Bullshit, your face is a lil' pale. You can tell me what's the matter, I won't judge Cloud." Barret pats his shoulder. "Ohhh, I get it. Lemme guess. You're worried about being a father. That right?"
His eyes went wide. He scoffed, turning his head to the side. "...that obvious?"
"Duh, I know that feeling and look anywhere. I'm a dad myself, I had the same concerns about Marlene." He sighed. "I was a nervous wreck too, y'know? When Marlene was still a little baby, I often wondered if I really could be the father she deserved."
"You did?"
"Sure did. I was worried about making the wrong decisions, or failing her as a parent..."
He sighed. "Yeah, that's...that's what I'm worried about. I don't want to fail him, Barret. I want to be a dad he can rely on, feel safe with, not hate. But, I...I'm just not sure, y'know? I've never known what it's like to be a dad, considering mine walked out years ago..." He put his hands on his hips. "I need advice. Just a little bit of help. Anything you could suggest?"
Barret grumbles, crossing his arms. "Yeah, my first point of advice for you, don't be a jackass like that. I'll slap you upside the fucking head if you even do that to Aerith. Step up, be a dad. Don't leave them behind, ya hear?"
"..noted."
"Now, my next point. While parenting is rough around the edges, messy, and sometimes ugly, there's the many good things that outweigh it. Like for me. The moments that made it worth it? Seeing Marlene grow. Her first words, steps, her first day at school..." He smiles fondly, remembering. "Imagine all the things you'll get to do with your son."
Cloud did, imagining it. He thinks about the little things. Feeding his son, holding him close, reading him stories before bed, helping him with his homework, high fiving him when he wins a game... And he felt less scared. The stress and worries began to wash away. Maybe he can do this. He can step up, be the father he never had. Not only making his son proud, but his family and friends too.
"Did it help?" Barret asked.
"Yeah...it did, thanks."
"Anytime, man." He clapped him on the back. "Also, remember...you got this, man. We got your back, all of us. Tifa, me, Vincent, Cid...call us if you need help."
"I will."
Later that night, Cloud and Aerith were spooning in bed. His arms and hands wrapped around her swollen middle, feeling their child inside.
"He's surely active, isn't he?" Aerith says, peeking over her shoulder.
"He is, must be fighting in there," Cloud chuckles, rubbing her stomach. "I already love him so much, and he's not even here yet."
"Me too. I can't wait to meet him..." Aerith yawned, closing her eyes shortly after.
He eyed her middle, taking note of each little kick, each subtle movement.
I'll be the best damn father you could ever have, buddy. Don't worry. I love you so much.