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Wilhelm’s eyes slowly fluttered open, and the first thing that came in sight was his bedroom’s ceiling. As the morning fog faded away and his mind’s fuzziness cleared up, Wilhelm suddenly remembered; Simon. Where is Simon?
He could feel panic rushing through his veins as he pushed the blanket off of his body, sitting straight up on his bed, his legs almost going numb. Amidst the panic, Wilhelm was mentally preparing himself for disappointment. The usual disappointment.
Through the eternity that it took for his feet to reach the ground, looking for his slippers, thoughts like ‘was that another dream?’ and ‘I don’t want that to happen again’ swarmed his mind and tangled, mixing up with the drowsiness of early mornings — until a familiar voice broke the silence in the room.
“Wille? What’s the rush for, so early in the morning?” The voice echoed through the room with a hint of confusion and curiosity.
Wilhelm turned his head so fast that he could have broken his neck.
On his ridiculously huge king sized bed, Simon laid half naked, contrasting the brightness of the bedsheets with his skin, illuminated by the sunlight coming from the window right behind him. Curls frizzy and clumped, flying in all directions, with puffy morning eyes, cheeks flushed and skin looking as soft as ever. With his head tilted, Simon couldn’t help but mutter something like ‘why are you looking at me like that?’ in a shy voice, feeling self-conscious as he averted his gaze somewhere else, avoiding Wilhelm’s burning stare of disbelief.
Simon is here. Simon is here, that was not a dream. Wilhelm’s eyes softened and he could feel his heart physically melt at the sight of his boyfriend, the loudness of his mind toning down and his shoulders relaxing; Simon was the cure of it all. He huffed a laugh at his own ridiculousness, concluding that he was doomed, helplessly in love with him to be waking up in cold sweat in desperate need for him.
“Now you’re laughing all by yourself, have you gone crazy? Has last night driven you to madness?” Simon asked again, hoping for an answer this time by bringing up last night’s events.
Wilhelm chuckled at his lack of patience, “I’m definitely going crazy, crazy in love with you.” He teased through laughter as he adjusted himself back into his bed, tucked under the blanket, his skin coming in contact again with Simon’s.
Simon’s ears went beet red, when Wilhelm’s fingertips delicately came brushing the curls behind them. “I thought I had dreamed of you again, I thought you weren’t here.” He said, his voice tainted in seriousness, glimmering eyes locking with Simon’s.
Simon’s eyes on the other hand, widened in surprise and his heart skipped a beat, feeling particularly timid about waking up in Wilhelm’s bedroom for the very first time. “I’m not going anywhere. I’m right here, Wille.” He answered in a murmur, hoping to reassure Wilhelm’s worries as he leaned forward to place a gentle kiss on the corner of his lips.
“You’re so beautiful.” The blonde haired boy answered, mesmerized by the golden cast left by the sunlight over Simon’s hair and the softness of his lips. Before Simon could pull away, Wilhelm took advantage of the proximity to smack their lips in a soft and swift kiss. “Good morning.” He proceeded, eyes closing as he joined their foreheads, “I’m so happy, I’m afraid I’m dreaming right now. I hope I never wake up if that’s the case.”
“Oh my god, it’s too early for this — shut up.” Simon groaned in annoyance, with a hint of endearment in his voice. “Just how many times have you dreamed of me?”
“Many times.” Wilhelm answered with no hesitation, his hand now tracing Simon’s collarbone, feeling him shudder under his touch, immortalizing the moment before pulling him into a hug. Simon’s warmth in the morning — Wilhelm couldn’t believe himself.
“This bed has always felt like it was fifty times its actual size whenever I slept on it. My body always sunk so deep into the mattress, making me feel suffocated and uncomfortable. Lonely and cold, I almost dreaded bedtime.” Wilhelm said, his hand rubbing Simon’s back, and he could feel him crumbling and melting under the touch. “It feels so warm right now, I don’t even want to move. I’m so grateful for you.”
“To bathe in your scent like this and wake up here — it’s me who feels like it’s a dream.” Simon’s voice cracked, his nose buried in the crook of Wilhelm’s neck.
“Can we stay like this for a bit longer?” Wilhelm’s voice came in a low whisper as he laid flat back into the bed, cuddling Simon next to him. “Hmm.” The brown haired boy nodded in approval.
“Wille?” Simon spoke again. “Yeah?” Wilhelm asked, his hand tracing along Simon’s shoulder, then into his arm, reaching for his hand to intertwine it with his. “I love you.” Simon’s voice came out soft and delicate — as though it was a secret for Wilhelm alone to hear, and the words tugged at Wilhelm’s heart strings.
“I love you too.” A lot more than you think, he couldn’t help but think to himself.
Suddenly, the cold anxious mornings were now warm and comfortable, the ridiculously large bed and the crumpled bed sheets now felt so small and fuzzy to his skin. The blanket was warm all over their bodies and not heavy, the gloomy, cloudy sight outside the window was now sunlight slipping through, greeting Simon in the morning, deepening and accentuating his beauty. His bedroom smelled of Simon, and felt like Simon; warm and cozy.
Wilhelm has never felt this much love and gratitude in his whole life. It’s as though his perception of things completely changed whenever Simon was in the picture, as though he put color over his gloomy world and texture over the numbness of everything that surrounded him.
Wilhelm never wanted to lose something so precious, ever.