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Guex had had exactly six pints. Tracking his consumption was very important. He needed to ride the fine line between "drunk tief in the bathroom telling you how pretty you look in his eyeliner" and "being forcibly removed from the party for blinding someone". Guex had spent too much on eyeliner to be removed from any party.
Blinding people was also bad, he supposed.
He made his rounds at the tiefling party, leaving the main camp to find kin who'd spilled into the surrounding woods, because tieflings really needed about twice the personal space as others, what with the horns and the tails and everyone always being so rude about the horns and the tails. He congratulated Zevlor on his big speech and brought Asharak drinks until he gave his own version of the speech (it was better) and poured a whole bottle of wine over Kanon's grave because death was not an excuse to be sober and bothered Pandirna until she agreed to return to the Grove for the rest of the alcohol. He tried to include Ikaron. Yes, Ikaron. Ikaron actually attended a party, for once, got to the inner circle and then sat in the corner with the strange wrinkled man, being very sober about everything.
Guex felt they had a good rapport. He often stood next to Ikaron and said things that were directed to him, and Ikaron didn't look at him or reply, but he once saw Ikaron fight five children and completely devastate them (he didn't even go easy, like Asharak wanted everyone to! He threw a pillow across the clearing and they thought Gan might've lost another eye! Umi still had "ICKARONN" scrawled across his knuckles!) and there was the time Ikaron took off his armor so Guex could see his muscles. Nothing had come of it. Ikaron seemed to think he had legitimately taught Guex something about swords by letting him admire his Adonis belt.
Guex would forever be grateful to him for that.
The point, though, was they had a good rapport. Ikaron sometimes joined his little Guex-peditions outside the Grove and generally tolerated Guex's voice, and with Ikaron that was all he could really hope for. So when he visited his tragically sober friend for the thirty-third time that evening to discover him drunk, well, it only made sense to drag him away from that dreary seat. There was dancing, after all, and chatting, and more ale.
Very, very quickly he realized that the line where Ikaron stabbed people with eyeliner was at about one and a half pints. They walked back to the Grove together, Ikaron veering off the path randomly and Guex dragging his heavily armored weight back on target. Guex escorted him back to where he slept, because he was a gentleman, but right as he was leaving Ikaron clamped a gauntleted hand over Guex's wrist.
"I have been too cold to you," Ikaron said.
"Nonsense!"
With the casual strength of someone who wore 1/5 of Guex's entire weight as his casual wear, Ikaron pulled him close.
"I would like to apologize."
"Accepted."
"And to say that I appreciate your company."
"Good to know!"
"And I would like to kiss you."
"Ikaron, you scoundrel." Guex gave his shoulder a friendly punch. All his knuckles cracked. He shook his hand out and said, "Sounds like you're coming onto me."
Ikaron's brows crashed together. "You were coming onto me."
"Ages ago!"
"No, moments ago. You said there was an animal in me waiting to be released."
Guex, who had one told Ikaron he would be happy to oil his muscles, who had once told Ikaron that if he needed kissing practice he would happily help, who once woke up next to him and, upon assurance that his honor was still intact, wondered aloud if Ikaron wanted to fix that, what aghast. All this time. Animals?
What a deviant.
Sheepishly, Ikaron said, "Pandirna explained things to me."
That explained it. Pandirna thought she was being helpful. Pandirna wasn't the one trapped with a heavily armored man who couldn't even hold two pints.
Ikaron tried to brush a lock of hair over Guex's ear and instead nailed him in the forehead. "Sorry."
"It's fine! Happens all the time!"
Ikaron dropped his head to Guex's shoulder, probably permanently ruining all those years of posture training. Somewhere back in Elturel, Nan was rolling in her grave. "I wanted you to know I saw you."
"I'm glad."
"And I liked you."
"As you should."
"And I… didn't realize you liked me. You're so…"
Dashing? Captivating. Guex-emplerary!
"Compact, and twitchy, like one of those little dogs with the big eyes. Your insides are too big. Your outsides—you are such a focused... Rat hunter."
"Al-alright?" Gods, this was the strangest courtship he'd ever been involved in, and only partly because it was his first.
"Alright. So it's alright?" Ikaron smiled. He really did have the nicest smile, sweeter because of how rare it was. Guex smiled back, patted him on the shoulder and didn't realize what question he was answering until Ikaron had him pressed between a rock and hard armor, their horns clacking together, his mouth clumsily putting a lot of spit on Guex's.
"Ikaron," Guex said. On the Ik, Ikaron grunted. On the ka he got the tip of his tongue into Guex's open mouth. On the ron, a finger's width of Lucretius's Pro Series Waterproof Vegan Charred Orb in Rebel Red stick crumbled against his forehead, drawing a little blood.
Ikaron touched a hand to it and said, "You're right. I should have been less aggressive."
Guex laughed, the incredulous laugh of a man who finally got a kiss from the man he'd been openly flirting with for tendays and then had to stab the kisser on principle, because who does that? "Indeed, my good fellow. Now. I'll take my leave."
Then he stumbled back to his own bed and stared up at the stars.
Soon.
Soon they would be at the Gate. He could find a new strong, silent, emotionally repressed mother's boy to obsess over and maybe kiss, since his current was likely to not appreciate his new head wound tomorrow. And a new stick of Lucretius's Pro Series Waterproof Vegan Charred Orb in Rebel Red.
He woke the next morning to a cooling cup of tea. Ikaron sat near the fire, a kettle over it.
"Hungover?" Guex asked.
Ikaron shrunk back into his armor. "I would like to apologize for last night."
"Oh, you won't be the last person I stab," Guex said. Eugh. Where he got Ikaron looked pretty ugly. Maybe he shouldn't use necrotic products on his eyes.
No. It was worth it, to look this good.
Ikaron stood and marched away, thus making this a normal interaction.
"Wait," Guex said. "If you want, since we're all now of sound mind, you may try again. To kiss me. You may kiss me now." He huffed into his hand and sniffed. "I have morning bre—"
The sun disappeared behind Ikaron's impressive bulk and he gently placed a heavy hand on his shoulder, leaning in, brushing his lips in the most gentle kiss. Then another one, less of a brush and now a bruise. Guex's knees went weak but Ikaron hooked an arm around his waist, delivering a final blow in the form of a third kiss, with polite tongue, strike-parry-thrust, haha, and then Ikaron pulled back, taking Guex's breath with him.
"I must go to my post," he said, "but find me when I'm off and we can do that again."
Guex nodded, one hand still pressed to his lips.