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Susie was sitting in class, waiting for the bell to ring. She anxiously gnawed at her pencil, tasting the wood as the seconds counted down on the clock. As soon as the bell rings she stands up to go. Before she can get out the door, Alphys stops her, tells her she needs to get her grades up.
It's not the first time it's happened. Alphys asks how Susie's doing at home. She shuts her eyes tight, wincing at the reminder that she'll have to go there tonight. She says it's fine. She's in control.
***
Its the fourth night in a row, staying late at Ice-e’s, cleaning up child vomit and mopping greasy kitchen floors. The smell of multi-surface cleaners clings to her clothes, mixed with a hint of filth you only recognize if you spend 6 hours immersed in it every day. She rides the bus home feeling her polyester shirt cling to her scales in a way that makes her wanna scream.
She arrives home, managing to avoid waking her father and getting to bed quickly. As she fights to fall asleep she prepares herself for his inevitable anger in the morning.
She doesn't dream.
***
She walks down the hall and bumps into Kris, dropping her phone. When she picks it up she finds it cracked. It's too much and she grabs Kris’s collar and pushes them to the ground. They just lie there. She walks away.
No one ever brings it up again. She feels a tiny bit happy about it.
***
She steals Alphys’s key to the supply closet. She'd been hoping to find something worth taking but it was mostly just school supplies and other worthless junk.
She takes the chalk, thinking she'll draw something inappropriate somewhere.
***
She finds herself hiding in the trees by the apartments. It's way too late. She just ran when he started swinging. Her arms and shoulders ache from the weight of the backpack.
She sits out there, deciding that she can't go back, at least not tonight. She looks for anything in her bag to eat. All she finds is a pack of chalk.
At least it's crunchy.
***
Kris catches her eating chalk. Susie hates that they know. Of all the pathetic wimps to catch her.
She threatens and even shoves them against the lockers. They go limp in her grip. She says the worst things she can say to them. They don't even seem to twitch in response.
***
That night she dreams. She dreams of purple fields and her friends. She dreams of power and strength. She dreams of magic and evil best friends and weird clowns and a world where she always belongs.
She notices a tear in her jacket as she slips it on the next morning.
***
When Noelle asks her out she's shocked. Part of her says to passionately make out with her immediately but instead she awkwardly agrees to a date at QC’s Diner. Noelle runs away without saying anything in response.
Kris chuckles. They laugh harder after she punches their shoulder.
***
She winces when Noelle squeezes her arm. She lies and says it's from a fall.
She doesn't speak to Noelle the next day.
***
She finds herself waking up at Kris’s house for the 5th time in as many days. She wonders what Toriel thinks of this. She tries not to think about her father.
Kris tells her that she can stay as often as she needs. She notices their choice of words. She decides to go home that night.
***
She finds herself sitting behind Ice-e's after dark. Everyone has already gone home and the street lamps illuminate the street. She knows what will happen if she heads home. She can't impose on the Dreemurrs any longer.
As she finally begins drifting off, wrapped in her torn jacket, a light shines on her face. She looks up and sees Undyne staring down at her.
***
Once she's in the warmth of the police station they ask her why she was sleeping behind the restaurant. She doesn't respond. They ask why her clothes are tattered. She mutters something they can't hear.
They ask if everything is ok at home. She looks in the officers eyes for the first time she can remember and sees a worried expression. She's lost control.
***
She's sitting at Toriel's table, Kris by her side. The adults are conversing in the living room.
Kris says they're sorry. It's not their fault. Kris says they should've noticed. Nobody noticed. They say that's not fair.
Before she leaves, Undyne promises to make things right.
***
When Noelle finally sees Susie, she rushes into her arms. She remembers her mistake and pulls away. Susie pulls her back and soon enough she's sobbing into her shoulder.
For the first time, Susie admits what her life has been like. Noelle tells her that it doesn't sound like living. She thinks it's all she has. Noelle assures her that's not true anymore.
***
She doesn't go to school for a while. She knows her grades must be slipping. The stack of unfinished assignments on Kris’s desk are evidence of that.
Noelle visits everyday. Berdly appears once or twice. The others tell him to shut up when he says something stupid.
***
Her father is arrested. They tell her that he was passed out drunk when they found him. She doesn't say anything.
***
Toriel assures her that she can stay as long as she wants. Legally, she's Susie's temporary guardian already, at least until it's made official. But they need Susie's permission for that.
Kris says that they can be her sibling. She doesn't feel right, just taking a spot in her house like that. Especially when Asriel's still coming back eventually.
***
On one of her many visits, Undyne talks to Susie. She tells her that she's strong for getting through all of this. She doesn't feel strong.
Undyne makes a suggestion Susie doesn't expect. She says she has a guest room and that Susie could come live with her. She'd have her own space and her own bathroom and it's not much but it's something. She says that she'd be honored to have Susie in her home.
***
There's not much to move into the guest room. Just some overflowing laundry baskets and some cheap electronics.
Undyne gives her space to settle in. They have burgers for dinner. Susie manages to eat three.
She sleeps peacefully that night. She dreams about her friends.
***
Once she goes back to school she has a lot to catch up on. Alphys gives her personal study sessions after class and Noelle tutors her. She starts feeling like she can handle it.
Undyne gets her a computer for her room. Posters begin populating the walls. She finally gets a new jacket.
***
Susie tells Undyne that she's transgender. Undyne admits that she knows because she has her birth certificate. Susie asks if she's okay with it and Undyne says that nothing could make Susie less of a woman.
As they embrace, Undyne mutters that she loves Susie, thinking she can't hear over the sobs. Susie doesn't mind it.
***
When Undyne says Susie has to get a haircut, she has a panic attack. She runs out the door and meets Kris by their house. Kris calms her down.
When Undyne finds them, she says that Susie doesn't have to cut her hair. She also clarifies that she only really needs a trim. Susie feels a bit silly.
***
Susie manages to barely pass her classes. She, Kris, Noelle, and Berdly all get ice cream to celebrate. She feels like a kid.
When she gets home Undyne greets her with a hug and congratulates her. Undyne cooks her a giant plate of spaghetti.
Susie spends her night playing games on her computer.
***
She wakes up in a cold sweat, shooting up in her bed. Undyne opens the door and rushes to bed, holding her. She had a nightmare about her father. Undyne assures her that he's in prison and they have a restraining order against him.
As the reptilian girl softly cries into her shoulder, Undyne makes a mental note to find a therapist.
***
Susie gets home late one night and opens the door. She begins apologizing for coming in after 10pm but stops when she sees that Undyne is currently making out with her teacher. She walks to her bedroom.
In the morning Undyne apologizes to Susie for not telling her about the date. Susie says she doesn't care but it's weird seeing your mom kissing someone. Undyne drops her coffee, the mug shattering on the ground. She pounces on Susie, wrapping her arms around the teen and crying tears of joy.
Susie thinks this feels like home.