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Three weeks ago…
“I need you to ask Charlie Spring out,” Isaac exclaims, seemingly out of nowhere.
He and James are on library duty and putting the finishing touches to their display of books by queer authors (complete with rainbow fans) for LGBTQ+ history month.
“You need me to do what?” James replies, wondering if he is momentarily hallucinating or whether Isaac has in fact completely lost the plot.
“I need you to ask Charlie Spring out,” Isaac repeats.
“Okay, so that’s what I thought you said. But why on earth would you need me to do that?”
“Because I need you to make Nick Nelson jealous,” Isaac replies as though it was the most obvious reason in the world. James looks at him as though he’s got three heads.
“Isaac?”
“Hmmm,” Isaac hums as he stands a copy of ACE by Angela Chen, front and centre on the display.
“Can I ask you a question?”
“Yes James.”
“Are you on drugs?!”
“No James, I can assure I am not on drugs. I am of perfectly sound body and mind, but that doesn’t change the fact that I need you to ask Charlie Spring out. What part of this are you not grasping?”
“Well fundamentally, the part where you want me to ask Charlie Spring out in order to make Nick Nelson, the straightest person I have ever seen, jealous.”
Isaac sighs and rolls his eyes. “Nevermind whether it's an unusual request, will you do it?”
“Er yeah, I guess so.”
///
“Well, what did he say?” Isaac asks with the most expectant look on his face.
“Um, I think maybe I took him a bit by surprise. He looked quite embarrassed and said he’d have to get back to me after he’d checked what he had on in his diary. Like who keeps a diary?!”
“Honestly, it’s all good, that’s basically just code for check if Nick wants to do something first and therefore I have a reason to say no, trust me!”
“Yeah, maybe, but Isaac, are we really sure this is a good idea? I mean what if he ends up saying yes, I don’t actually want to go out on a date with Charlie. No offence, but he’s just not my type.”
“Honestly, do not fret poppet, it won’t get that far I promise. I’m sure this will spur Nick into action!”
“But will it? I mean I’m still not convinced about this notion of yours that Nick is crushing on Charlie in the first place. What actually are you basing this on?”
“Okay, well we’ve all seen the way Charlie looks at Nick right?”
“Ha! Yeah pretty much how everyone in a 20 mile radius looks at Nick Nelson.” James coughs nervously. “Well, I mean not everyone looks at him like that.”
“I just think what with Nick asking Charlie to join the rugby team, and now they’re hanging out together at weekends and stuff, that Nick likes him back. I mean maybe he’s still figuring stuff out, maybe he doesn’t have a label for himself yet, but I’ve seen the way he looks at Charlie. And god only knows it’s about time something good happened in his life and I just think Nick would be good for him. Well in fact not just good. Perfect.”
“Well yeah, I agree we all know why Charlie said yes to joining the rugby team. I mean you know when you have a crush on someone, proximity to them is a good thing,” James replies wistfully.
“If you say so,” Isaac replies. “Anyway, I mean it, just do me a favour and next time you see them together just look at the way they look at each other. Or more specifically, the way Nick looks at Charlie when Charlie isn't looking. And then come back and tell me you don’t think a certain rugby lad has a crush on a certain gay nerd.”
[17:47] james mcewan: ok henderson, maybe you’ve got yourself a point.
[17:48] isaac henderson: I know.
Two weeks ago…
“So you’ll ask him again?”
“Honestly I don’t know how you managed to talk me into this whole ridiculous meddling scheme in the first place.”
“It’s not meddling, it’s incentivising.”
“Incentivising?”
“Yes! I mean we are both agreed about Nick having a crush on Charlie too aren’t we? You saw how they were when they were queuing up for lunch today. Stood right up close to each other, whispering and giggling. They just need a bit of gentle encouragement.”
“By which you mean me asking Charlie out again?”
“Exactly!”
“But I mean he already turned me down last week. Why would he suddenly turn round and say yes?”
“Honestly James, are you deliberately missing the point of this exercise?” Isaac sighs wearily. “We don’t actually want Charlie to say yes, we just want to…”
“I know, I know, make Nick jealous.”
“Exactly! So you’ll ask him again?”
///
“Oh god Isaac, that was so embarrassing! He almost looked like he was going to throw up on the spot. It didn’t help that I hadn’t realised Nick was there too.”
“Nick was there? Where the bloody hell did you ask him?”
“Just at the lockers but Charlie had his door open and I hadn’t realised Nick was standing on the other side of it. I was so fixated on remembering what I had to say that I wasn't really paying attention to who else was there.”
“So what did he say?”
“Well before he could say anything, Nick ducked round from the locker and looked a bit panicked and Charlie just mumbled something about having to babysit his younger brother.”
“Oh god, it’s worse than I thought.”
“What do you mean, worse than you thought?”
“Well, it seems our young Nicholas Nelson is proving to be more reticent in the professing his feelings department than I had envisaged.”
“Oh for fuck’s sake Isaac, stop sounding like one of your pretentious period novels and get to the point.”
Isaac rolled his eyes above the current pretentious period novel he was reading. “I just mean I’m surprised Nick hasn’t made his move yet that’s all, but clearly you asking Charlie out is starting to have an effect on him. So you’ll just have to do it again.”
One week ago…
“Right this is absolutely, categorically, in point of fact the very last time I am doing this!” James exclaims in something of an exasperated manner.
He and Isaac are on library duty again and sorting through a collection of young adult literature for a display they are starting to put together for World Book Day.
“But I wanna believe in romance,” Issac whines petulantly, “and I really think we are finally getting somewhere James. You know I’m right. Those two belong together. They just don’t know it yet.”
“Well I’m pretty sure there’s only so many times Charlie can turn me down before he starts getting suspicious. He’s not stupid.”
“I know, I know, but they just need a little bit more help. Trust me. Hawkeye Henderson sees and knows everything. We are getting there. And those two are endgame. They just need one more little nudge.”
“Isaac, you do know nobody calls you Hawkeye Henderson right?”
“Only because we haven’t got it into everyone’s vernacular yet. But it’ll happen. Mark my words.”
James sighs. There he goes again with one of his long Isaac words that James has no idea the meaning of. Note to self: look up vernacular on google later.
“Anyway, even if you are right about Nick…”
“I am right.”
“Even if you are right about Nick, don’t you think me asking Charlie out twice already would have prompted him to do something?”
“I definitely think things are moving in the right direction. They seem to be even closer these last couple of weeks. They’ve started spending lunchtime in the art room, just the two of them together, which is suspiciously coupley if you ask me. And Charlie said the other day that when he has orchestra rehearsal after school at the same time as Nick has rugby practice, Nick waits for him afterwards and they walk home together. So I think he’s just working up the courage to make his move.”
“Okay okay, if it will finally shut you up, I will ask him one last time.”
///
“Just to be absolutely crystal clear, I am never doing that again!”
“I seem to remember you saying that before.”
“Isaac, I swear to god I mean it this time. Never again. Got it?”
“Okay okay, I’ve got it, I’ve got it, there’s no need to get your knickers in a twist McEwan. So anyway, more to the point. What happened?”
“I think honestly as soon as I approached him he knew what I was going to ask, so he seemed kind of prepared. He didn’t get as flustered as he did the last couple of times I’ve asked. He just said he was really flattered but he thought that we’d be better off as friends.”
“Ha! See, because there’s somebody else he wants to be more than friends with! I knew it. I was right!”
“Um Isaac, I don’t think Charlie’s crush on Nick was ever up for debate, it was Nick’s crush on Charlie…”
“Semantics James, semantics, the point remains he has officially told you he just wants to be friends. Leaving the door well and truly open for a certain golden retriever like rugby king to make his move! And he will. Trust me. Hawkeye Henderson is never wrong.”
“Still not a thing Isaac.”
Present Day
“So are you ready to go? I think if we cut through the hall it should be quicker,” Isaac suggests.
He and James had slightly lost track of time cataloguing a whole load of new books that had been dropped off at the library that morning and were in danger of being late for afternoon registration.
“Yup, just let me grab my bag and we can go.”
They walk quickly down the corridor and James is just about to push the hall door open when he sees something through the window that makes him stop.
“Isaac,” he whispers. “Look.”
They both peer through the window and can see that there had clearly been orchestra practice during lunch break. The hall is empty apart from where Charlie is packing up at the back and putting his drumsticks in his bag. Nick is standing by the doorway at the far end of the hall waiting for him. Charlie slings his bag over his shoulder and walks over to him, as Nick holds out his hand, his face breaking out into the lopsided grin Isaac has seen so many times over the last few weeks. The one reserved only for Charlie. Smiling back at him, his eyes sparkling, Charlie grabs it and briefly rests his head on Nick’s shoulder as Nick bends slightly to place a gentle kiss on his curls, before they walk out the door together hand in hand.
“See I told you, I just wanted to believe in romance.”
Fin