Chapter Text
short chapters/lower case intended
reminder:if you did not read the tags of the book, this story contains, mild alcohol use, but strong drug use, some smut (boyxboy), cutting, and very severe depression. if any triggers you in anyway please do not read any further . i have warned you, so read at your own risk.
also, this book may contain slow updates, sorry x
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love isnt a word you can just throw around, some people actually take the word seriously. they believe the word that you are telling them, they put their trust in you when you whisper it in your ear when you are holding them close.
they feel love when you tell it to them.
although, sometimes when people say that word, when they whisper it to you, while they are sticking their dick in you, they dont mean it. they are just carelessly throwing the word around like its nothing. like its just a word to them that doesnt matter.
but to you, the word means everything. it means the hand holding, the snuggling after sex, the warmness of your body heat, the forehead touches, the kisses you share in the dark, the giggling on the floor while you're wrestling, the silent conversations your eyes hold, it means the world to louis.
but, to louis past boyfriend, jake, he just intended to hurt louis. he didnt mean any words he told louis, he just carelssly threw the word around like it was a basketball on a court, and louis was the basketballer, chasing after the word, for the affection and love he craved for, the affection and love he deserved.
but sometimes, you end up with the wrong people you think are right for you.
like louis did.
he deserved everything in the world, he deserved, affection, love, someone to hold him when he was crying, someone to please him, someone to tender to him when he was sick, someone to kiss him slowly under the moon, while they were slow dancing. louis deserved the world at his feet.
but, the world wasnt given to him. instead, when he was crying, he would be left in his room feeling depressed. he didnt get to feel love like others did, he didnt get to slow dance under the moon while he was kissed softly.
but louis insisted jake loved him, he insisted that jake was in love with him like louis was in love with him. he blamed himself whenever jake would hit louis, louis would blame himself when jake would call him every horrible name under the sun.
and, all harry could do was watch in pain as louis was hurt, because louis would refuse to let harry help him. harry just wanted to help louis, to hold him close, and give him soft kisses under the moon, and slow dance with him, and harry just wanted to protect the small boy that got treated so badly by someone who should cherish him.
and when jake carelessly tossed louis to the side when he found another person to ruin their life, he left louis in a sobbing mess. louis blamed himself for everything. and when harry held him, he just felt like he should of helped louis when he could, because even if it meant louis wouldnt of spoke to him, it would of hurt less then to watch louis suffer like this, to watch louis sob over someone he shouldnt even care about, because jake didnt even care about louis.
louis was drowning when harry found him on the ground, in a sobbing mess. and harry is going to do everything he can to save the boy that deserves the world.
kudos xx