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Terror flowed through your entire body, you had to get out, had to find the rest of your group. Your heart pounded in your chest as you desperately searched for a way out of this hell. Panic flooded your mind as you ran, you could hear the voices of your captors just behind you.
Your clothes were covered in so much blood that they stuck to your skin. You couldn’t even recall whose blood it was. Tears streaked down your face as you felt the ominous presence behind you getting ever closer. A hand gripped your shoulder, spinning you around and…
You bolted upright, drenched in sweat and heaving in air as you took in your surroundings. The fog on your mind began to clear as you looked around. You were in your bed, in your room, safe. Although your brain hadn’t realised that. You needed to get fresh air, and space.
On unsteady legs you climbed out of bed. Going as quickly and quietly as possible, so as to not wake anyone else up, you made your way through the house. Rushing out of the front door, you halted and folded over with your hands on your knees. Gulping down as much air as you could manage, trying to ignore the way it burned your lungs.
You squeezed your eyes shut to try and stop the way your head was spinning. You clutched at your chest, willing your heart rate to slow down.
‘Ya good?’ The gruff voice made you jump, not expecting to see anyone at this time of night. But you should have known that Daryl would be out here. You carefully turned over to where he sat, perched on the edge of the porch seat leaning towards you.
Your alert brain quickly scanned him for any injuries. You wouldn’t find any, you were safe here, hidden behind these walls. Your breathing steadied as you continued to stare unblinkingly at him.
He gently called your name, leaning further forward, slight concern etched on his face at the fact you hadn’t spoken yet.
‘Yeah... bad dream,’ you managed to get out. You looked around, taking in the quiet peaceful surroundings. Your thundering heart began to slow, as your brain finally began to accept there was no immediate threat.
‘Wanna talk about it?’ Daryl asked, his eyes still on you, taking in your panicked state. You almost felt small under his gaze, knowing you probably looked like a deer caught in headlights.
Silently you made your way over and took a seat next to him. Your body relaxed slightly at Daryl’s closeness, his familiar smell grounding you.
‘Do you think we’re safe here?’ You hesitantly asked, instead of answering his question.
He stayed quiet for a moment, pondering your question. You watched him slowly exhale as he said ‘safer than we were out there.’
You nodded, looking down to your hands that rested in your lap. You knew he was right, there wasn’t a risk of walkers pounding at your door, not much risk of bad people around here either. But why couldn’t you relax? Why couldn’t you just forget and start anew?
Silent tears began to make their way down your face, you hadn’t even registered you were crying until Daryl gently placed his red cloth into your hand.
You muttered a quiet thanks as you quickly wiped your face, willing the tears to go away. ‘I can’t stop thinking about Terminus,’ you admitted quietly.
Daryl didn’t say a word, but you felt his eyes shift to you. You kept your own eyes down as you worked up to telling him more. Every night since you’d escaped that place had been filled with visions of the terrible things those people did.
‘That was meant to be a safe place, we were meant to be ok there and look how that worked out.’ Your mind flashed with the memory of you and the people you’d come to call your family all on your knees as other people’s throats were being sliced. You shoved the heels of your hands into your eyes in an attempt to try and erase the vision.
‘I can’t stop thinking that this,’ you gestured around you, ‘is all fake, and we’re gonna end up worse than before.’ You couldn’t stop the tears now, they were running freely down your cheeks.
Daryl remained silent beside you, he could understand the weight of your fears. It was one of the reasons he had barely slept himself, and opted to stay out keeping watch on the porch.
He turned, to fully face you before speaking ‘think Terminus messed with all our heads.’ After another moment of consideration he added, ‘but I don’ think this place is the same. There’s decent people here. Ain’t no one gonna let it go that way again.’
You nodded, his words easing your fears. The shadows of doubt in your mind began to shrink. You sniffed, once again looking out at the empty street in front of the porch. He was right, you did all have each other’s backs, and no one here had given you reason to think they had other intentions.
‘Ya know I’d never let anything happen to you,’ he spoke quietly, almost a whisper. That caused you to finally look over to him, meeting his blue eyes. The sincerity in them soothed the part of you that had been damaged by fear. ‘C’mere’ he murmured as he wrapped an arm around you, pulling you gently into his side.
Your body instantly melted into him, comforted by the way he held you so softly. Your head came down to rest on his shoulder as he spoke again. ‘I won’ let that happen to you ever again.’
Your tears slowed as his words wrapped around you in a protective embrace that shielded you from the lingering shadows. You turned, curling further into his side and wrapped your arm around his middle. Daryl’s arm held you tighter and the gentle squeeze of his hand on your arm cemented everything he had just said.
You trusted Daryl, more than you thought was even possible. The tears had completely stopped now, replaced with a quiet acceptance. The acceptance that no matter what, you would do everything you could to also protect the man holding you.
After a while Daryl murmured ‘you should go back to bed, try and get some proper sleep.’ You knew he was right, but you didn’t think you could handle going to lay in bed by yourself. Knowing the nightmares could start again as soon as you let your eyes close.
‘I can’t,’ you muttered, almost embarrassed. Daryl had just completely eased you, yet the thought of going upstairs alone was too much for you to do. Daryl’s presence was an anchor to you and the thought of leaving his side brought your fears back to the surface.
His hand, still wrapped around your arm, squeezed you lightly in reassurance. ‘I’ll come with…if it’d make ya feel better.’ His words caught you off guard, Daryl hadn’t spent a night inside since your group had arrived in Alexandria. You sat up again, not shifting too far away from his warmth but enough so you could peer up to his face.
‘I couldn’t ask you to do that Daryl,’ you said. You kept eye contact, how could you ask him to spend the night inside, giving up his own comfort just so you could hopefully spend a night not scared.
‘Ya ain’t asking, I’m telling you I’m happy to do it,’ you knew he wouldn’t lie to you. He really would come and spend the night inside if it meant you’d be okay. A small smile spread across your face. Gratitude swelled as you gazed into his caring eyes.
Unable to form the words to truly show your appreciation you simply nodded to him. The two of you rose from the bench and made your way inside. The quiet of the house wrapped around you both as Daryl placed his hand on your lower back, gently guiding you up the stairs.
Inside your room the shadows seemed less ominous with Daryl at your side. His presence made you feel the safest you’d felt in weeks. Silently you slipped back into your bed, watching as Daryl began to make his way to the chair positioned by your window.
‘You can stay next to me if you want,’ you quickly said before he could take a seat. You didn’t want to overstep, but the thought of Daryl’s arm holding you again fueled your confidence to suggest sharing the bed.
Daryl paused, his eyes meeting yours from across the room with a hint of surprise. The subtle shift in your dynamics hung in the air. Without a word, he nodded, abandoning the idea of staying in the chair.
The mattress dipped slightly as he lay down next to you. The boundaries around you blurred as you both found a comfortable position to lie in. You felt his steady breaths sync with your own as his arm draped protectively around you, whilst you settled into his side.
For once you weren’t scared to close your eyes and succumb to sleep. You found solace from the terrors plaguing your mind in Daryl’s arms. The intimacy of sharing a bed transformed your room into a sanctuary where you could both finally rest.