Chapter Text
Darkness. Nothing, but darkness. She tries to kick, punch, scream, cry- but nothing works. It’s almost as if she’s falling, but what is falling like? How does she know? But then again, what is not falling like? How long has she been here? When will she get out? It feels like the darkness is closing in on her, there’s less air- Will she suffocate? How does she even know what suffocation is, there’s nothing in this place and it’s getting smaller, there’s less air, less and less and less and less and less and less and she cant breath and oh Aeons she can’t breath, she tries and tries but nothing happens- She wants to scream but there’s no air left in her lungs, her vision starts blurring, even though her view has been nothing but the black nothingness. She feels her consciousness leave her, and then-
Stelle jolts awake, there’s finally air, she can breathe again, and so she sits there, for Aeons know how long just…breathing, and trying to calm her heart. Once she’s recovered, though still panting a bit, the ashen girl looks around; she is her room, on the Astral express, everything is as it should be…It was just a nightmare again, they have been a relatively common occurrence ever since, - well - ever since she’s been a part of the Express crew, so basically since Stelle’s been Stelle.
As her mind clears up more, she feels her bangs sticking to her forehead, and suddenly she’s way too aware of how her pajamas stick to her body uncomfortably, she should take a shower.
And so Stelle sighs and slowly pushes her blankets off, putting her bare feet on the soft carpet next her bed. The cold night air hits the girl at once, it feels good, disregarding how her body shivers from the contact. It helps ground her even more. She’s okay, just a bit tired. All she needs is a shower and everything will be fine.
Her feet find their way into the fluffy, kitty-esc slippers she got from March months back, when she first joined the Nameless. It was one of the first gifts she’s ever gotten, not just from March, but from anyone. At least as far as she can remember. Stelle pushes herself off of her bed, and heads for the door, not bothering to grab her phone, it will just be a quick shower anyway.
On her way to the bathroom, she notices the lights are still on in Archives, it must be past 3 am already, she’ll have to mention this to a certain archivist in the morning. The man wakes up way too early and sleeps way too late for it to be healthy…Though he IS a vidyadhara, it might be different for him…But regardless! His sleep schedule is still truly horrendous…
She knocks on the bathroom door, waits a few seconds…
No response.
As soon as the door opens, she switches the lights on. She gets inside and the door closes. The girl debates on whether taking a cold shower would be worth it, it would feel better, but if she plans on catching any more shut eye tonight, a warm shower would be the sensible choice… Just this once, she will go with the normal solution. But ONLY because she’s tired and she already went to sleep later than usual.
She reaches into the cabin for the valve, as it takes a while for the water to heat up, she turns it up just enough for it to not be too hot, but also be hot enough. She takes her sweet time slipping her clothes off, one: something to do while the heater is doing its thing with the water, and two: they’re very sticky because, sweat, so it actually takes a while taking them off. Once she’s done, the relatively cold air hits again, but this time her whole body, head to toe, exposed to the air of the bathroom, she shivers a bit. After a few quick seconds of standing there, feet planted on the floor mat, getting used to the cold, she takes her clothes and puts them on top of one of the nearby drawers. Stelle grabs one of Himeko’s hair clips she must’ve left there when she was here, she’s sure the older woman wouldn’t mind.
Since Stelle is not in the mood to dry her hair, nor does she like sleeping with wet hair, she quickly puts hair up. It’s pretty messy, but it’s enough to stop MOST of her hair from falling out. She reaches her arm into the cabin again, checking the water, she decides the temperature is good enough, and climbs in.
She closes the cabin door behind her, relief washes through her as the hot water pours down on her. The girl is usually not prone to think about much when she’s in the shower but, this time feels different somehow. Maybe it’s because -almost- everyone on the Express is asleep, so there’s no one waiting on her to get in themselves, after a long day of battles and helping people, or maybe it’s something else. Something subconscious probably, she couldn’t get herself to think about it more, with that mixture of relaxation and tiredness she’s feeling, it’s a bit hard thinking hard. It’s probably a subconscious thing for a reason anyway, her brain must not want her to know. Which is frustrating, but she couldn’t care less at the moment. She just wants to soak the water in and not think about that damn dream and-
That dream. Or, nightmare would probably be more fitting. They’ve been plaguing her for a while now but they usually don’t get this much of a, well, physical reaction out of her. A bit of heavy breathing and quick heartbeat sure, but usually not to this extent. She’s…not sure what makes this time so different. Dreams are strange, she supposes.
She sighs, she doesn’t even remember much of that nightmare anyway…Except for that horrible feeling. How she struggled and tried and tried and tried and she tried so much, but the void just kept closing in on her and how her lungs were so empty and no matter how many times she tried to breathe there would be no air and she’d just helplessly gasp and cry and try to stay conscious she just couldn’t, she felt so weak and pathetic and-
Stop! Stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, please just STOP!
The thread snaps. Stelle is suddenly very cold. She feels her hand resting on the valve, she must’ve closed the water off. She sighs. At least it got her out of…Whatever that was. She does not like this feeling. This deep, uneasy feeling within her. Another sigh.
I guess it’s time to get out, she thinks.
The ashen girl opens the cabin door to reach for a black towel, her towel. She steps out back onto the mat, and quickly dries herself, only to realise she forgot to bring a new change of clothes… She has no choice but to get back into her gross, sweaty sleep wear, even if it’s just for a while it’s still, yuck. A third sigh escapes her as she puts the towel back, and starts putting her clothes back on.
It feels pretty uncomfortable but, what can she do? She is NOT willing to go out into the car corridor with nothing but her way too small towel wrapped around her and slippers, no, no, no, never in a million years!
Once she’s done dressing, she gets out of the bathroom, turning off the lights behind her as she does, and starts walking to her room.
She got to her room, a success! Stelle’s just about to reach to open the door, when she suddenly hears something fall not too far away. Some things to be more specific. A lot of things actually. That’s…concerning. She looks at the direction of the sound and realises where it came from.
The Archives.
Stelle slowly walks over to the door, she doesn’t hear much, despite all those things falling earlier. Worrying. She raises her hand to knock, but before it touches the door, she hesitates. What if she’s bothering him? She ultimately decides that even if she is, it’s better to annoy the man a bit, than not checking in on him when something might’ve happened. So she knocks.
“...Dan Heng? Are you good?”