Chapter Text
The house he was reluctant to call home hadn't changed much over the years.
It was still dark and quiet, devoid of any family mementos and decorations, and the front door was always unlocked. No amount of time could change these things. Whereas people changed, objects could not unless someone willed them to, and that house- the one Fushimi Saruhiko finally decided to leave- was never going to change because no one but him wanted it to.
Eighteen years of suffering in silence and growing up without a soul to call his friend or rely on had had some sort of impact on him, he supposed, as he stuffed what few belongings he had into a duffel bag. Because he was always alone he didn't have anything that meant much to him, nothing that would be missed if it wound up lost or stolen. In that sense he wasn't much different from what little possessions he had. He'd take what he needed and disappear without a word and no one would ever go and look for him. No one would miss him when he was gone, he had already been long since forgotten.
Some clothes, cash, and his laptop- that was all he took with him, not even bothering to take the house keys because he knew if he ever returned, that that door would still be wide open. Even then the house would be cold and quiet, and the driveway would be empty, too. For him, there was no one to return to. Just a building that had served as both his hell and his haven, depending on what day it was.
It had been five weeks since he had seen his mother's uncaring face and even longer since he had seen his cruel fathers, though the last time he saw the latter had been when the cops drug him away on some kind of hit and run charges. In some sick way, that had been the best day of Saruhiko's bleak life. It had been a pleasure to watch the man who made his life a living hell have a taste of his own medicine.
That man had destroyed everything he had ever created, rubbed it in his face until his little monkey knew that the things he held dear and the things he took pride in were worth nothing. Not to Fushimi Niki, and to anyone. At age six, Saruhiko had a good grasp of that. At age seven, he stopped creating things he couldn't destroy himself. At age fifteen, it was himself that he had begun to destroy. Things hadn't changed much in the last three years.
If he were to form a list of things he hated he would top every single one, followed only by vegetables and his father- who he really wished was killed in prison and burning up in hell- and he figured that maybe, just maybe, that would be the way things were meant to be.
People were an anomaly in Saruhiko's mind. How others could spend their days parading around, performing work like robots and pretending to care about others, was beyond his level of comprehension- but then again, if he couldn't control it and calculate it in his mind then it was beyond his capacity. In terms of books and street smarts, he was a genius in every sense of the word. When it came to other people, he was at a complete and total loss.
It wasn't like he had a lot of chances to improve his knowledge either. The only contact he had ever known had been either torment from his father, neglect from his mother, the nagging of his sitters and teachers, and the violence someone like him was introduced to by kids his age who couldn't see him as anything more than a freak.
Despite his status as a genius, he had left school at age fourteen, and as if to agree with the sentiment that he was truly alone in the world, not a soul from the school system had even attempted to contact him or his parents. Or if they did, he wasn't aware of it. From that point onward he spent his days cooped up in a nearby internet cafe- where he was headed now- where he worked online and coded websites for a decent exchange of cash.
It was easy work for him and the payout was good, good enough he could get some run of the mill apartment in a bad part of town if he wanted but he felt that would be useless. The only time he had returned home had been to sleep, and on the days when his father had been home, he hadn't ventured out at all- instead, he'd lock himself in his room and pray to no one in particular that that man didn't come knocking on his door. He always did.
Now, Saruhiko had no intention of returning to that place. That sterile house that had never really been a home and that had been the shelter for misery and suffering alike. If objects could miss people then he was sure it wouldn't care for his absence either. If he were to fall off of the earth or if he were to be dead and gone the planet would keep on moving forward like nothing ever happened. No one would remember the boy with glasses that hid behind a cold expression and never said a word to anyone.
For that reason, a part of Saruhiko longed for death, as if that would be the only way to end his eternal pain and torment, but another part of himself- one that was much more prideful of things he didn't have and abilities he only wished he possessed- wouldn't allow himself to end his life. Not while he had nothing to show for his existence, not while the earth would keep turning and no one would ever know he existed.
That was all he wanted, for someone to know that he was alive and that he was breathing. He didn't need that person to tell him he wasn't worthless- because he truly thought he was, he heard it so many times that he had begun to believe it himself- but for someone to know that he once walked on the same planet as them, breathed the same air, that was enough for him.
So as he got to his favorite twenty four hour cafe and ordered a black coffee, from the same woman who served him every day he went there, he surveyed the crowd. Stashed away in a corner out of almost everyone's view, he watched people come and go for the next hour as he stared idly at the door, completely and totally out of it as he nursed his coffee and remembered small details of strangers who all seemed so much more alive than him.
He tried to find similarities in them, tried to find out if there was some sort of formula for happiness that maybe he hadn't noticed before, but as complicated as human emotions were of course there was no real way to adequately explain them. It was simple, in his mind anyway, that the world was happy and would continue to go onward and that he, who was trapped in his head and only felt alive when he was dreaming, was lonely and everything but nonexistent.
As much as he longed for someone to look at him and not just see some sad boy with glasses, he felt himself cringe whenever someone locked eyes with him. It was a reflex, to hate and not trust those around him- to expect cruel words and pain from those who shared the same planet as him- and for some reason or another none of their attention was what he wanted. Those people probably saw a thousand faces a day, there was no way they'd remember his. That wasn't what he was after.
After ordering another cup of coffee, he pulled his laptop out of his duffel bag and plugged the charger into the wall outlet, booting up the system as he pulled a small headset out of the front pocket of his bag. He quickly typed out the name of a social site he had discovered some odd years ago, an online community called Jungle that could be used for anything a person could ever need out of a social media site or game streaming software. It did it all. There was no simpler way to explain it.
As he logged on and clicked on a particular game, one with a rubix cube that had to be solved before the opponents, he quickly launched into the puzzle. Clearing the red side first before working on the blue and then the green, his opponent was yet to solve one side of his or her puzzle by the time he was on the fourth. In only seventeen seconds he completed his, successfully defeating his opponent- who surprised him by purposing a rematch.
He rolled his eyes as he accepted the request, wondering briefly if the other person saw what rank he was in the game. Out of all the players on Jungle, numbers well into the millions, he was number six on the site's top player list. If he put any effort into it he'd certainly be first, but alas, this was merely his means of escaping reality- nothing more, nothing less.
Red side finished, four seconds.
All sides completed, fifteen seconds.
Again, another rematch.
If you want to so easily give me your points then fine, he thought to himself as he continued to accept match after match. Even when the game closed he'd get a notification, another invite from the other person, asking to play him again. When he bested his personal record, and the games as well, of finishing the puzzle in six seconds flat on a particularly lucky scramble, he got a message notification in the bottom of his screen.
Yatagarasu: Okay, maybe challenging you wasn't such a good idea! You're really good! How do you do it? :O
Fushimi Saruhiko: It's called practice.
Yatagarasu: It's called you're just super talented, man. Mind if I send you a friend invite? It's kinda cool, knowing I’m playing against and talking to one of Jungle's best players. You're a bit of a celebrity on here! ^^;
Yatagarasu would like to be your friend!
Didn't even wait for an answer, Saruhiko thought to himself as he hovered his cursor over the decline button, letting out a sigh as he switched it to accept and clicked it.
Yatagarasu is now your friend!
Yatagarasu: Sweet! Hey wait, it says you don't have any other friends on here? What gives? Is that a glitch or something?
Fushimi Saruhiko: No.
Yatagarasu: So...you've never added anyone else before?
Fushimi Saruhiko: Again, no.
Yatagarasu: Okay, now I feel like I really am special, getting to talk to you of all people and being your friend on here, too. This is awesome. Thanks for accepting. :D
Before he could even type out a response the chat bubble moved again, indicating that the other user was writing something else. He let out a deep breath as he reached for his coffee, wondering why this conversation felt any different than the others ones he had had on Jungle in the past. He had talked to the other top players and was in their circle but he had always declined friend requests, he liked to keep his profile clean and devoid of pointless things. That, and it was also set on private. Meaning the few photos he did have posted would become available the moment he accepted any requests.
If he was honest, the only reason he accepted this one was because the guy didn't outright demand it or beg him for it. Just asked and sent it, which was different than the others. The emotional gap he had from leaving everything else behind earlier in the night filled a little as he continued to watch the text bubble bounce around, knowing a message was coming and that for some reason or another, this pointless conversation and the guy's blatant enthusiasm at being able to talk to him, made a part of Saruhiko feel alive.
This was the kind of attention he wanted. Not some fleeting recognition in the eyes of a person who would forget his face the moment they turned away. This person knew who he was, had probably heard horrible things on the boards about his personality and way of shutting others out and even destroying their accounts if they wouldn't leave him alone, and yet he persisted.
He could only wonder how long that would keep up for. At some point or another he was sure this person would only disappear and forget he existed, too. That was something he felt he would have to keep reminding himself of.
Yatagarasu: Sorry if this seems kinda weird or whatever, but I’m super bored and you honestly seem like the coolest person on this site so would you maybe mind talking with me for a bit? The other players are all the same, they brag about accomplishments they don't even have and you're kind of a mystery. I mean, yeah, I’ve heard you don't really like talking to people and I'm sure you have a thousand other things you could be doing but I figured it was worth a shot.
Yatagarasu: I really like Jungle, but I’m a bit new to the site, I’ve only been playing for a year and there's still a lot about it I don't know but I'd really like to learn. So maybe if I gave you some of my points would you help me move up a bit and teach me some stuff about it? Don't ask me why, but after I heard about you I just knew I had to seek you out. I can't believe you actually replied and accepted my requests! I always knew the top players were really cool, despite what others might say, and this really proved those other people wrong. You made my day, thanks man. :D
Saruhiko re-read the passage several times, not at all understanding the words the first time around and the second time he was only more confused. Why is this person freaking out over something like this? It's just a stupid game and a stupid website...why do they think this is so important? But against every part of his mind that made him want to shut the computer and ignore the other person's message, and despite the fact that he was confused over the persons interest in him, he chose to type out a reply.
Fushimi Saruhiko: Thanks...I guess. I’m not really doing anything so we can talk if you want, and don't worry about the points. I can give you a few pointers and then it's just up to you to practice or whatnot.
With bated breath and an eagerness he didn't know he possessed, he waited for a reply.
Yatagarasu: Really? Oh man, you're seriously the best! Your profile photo is kinda bad ass by the way, are you good at throwing knives? :O
Saruhiko cursed as he remembered that particular photo but he chose to ignore his embarrassment for the time being and instead hovered his mouse over the other user's profile. After pulling it up in a new tab he scrolled down until he got to the user's photo and about me section.
Name: Yata
Age: 19
Location: Shizume Town, Tokyo, Japan
Occupation: …still working on that one!
Hobbies: Skateboarding, listening to music, and running.
Jungle Rank: N
Player Rank: 12,098,376
Friends: 139
The person in the photo was a bright eyed man with a wide smile on his lips, sporting rather shaggy reddish brown hair, and a pair of white colored headphones that hung from his neck. All in all, he looked like a lot of people their age, though this man- Yata- looked like he was still a bit scrawny and had some more growing to do. Unlike Saruhiko, who figured he was done with that stage in his life. As he scrolled through the photos- an action he would later question as to why he did it- another notification popped up on his screen.
Yatagarasu: Wait, you live in Shizume too? O.o
Fushimi Saruhiko: Oh, yeah. I guess.... Yeah, I live in Shizume.
Yatagarasu: I'm gonna take that “I guess” as a “hell yeah, I’m really good at throwing knives” because you probably are. With my luck I'd kill someone or even myself if I tried. XD That's awesome! I had no idea all the top players were from Tokyo, I knew the others lived here but I didn't know you lived here, too. Oh, by the way, do you have a mic? I was gonna see if you wanted to talk, it might be easier! ^^;
Fushimi Saruhiko: Yeah, I have a mic.
Yatagarasu: So...can we chat or what? XD
Fushimi Saruhiko: I guess we can.
Yatagarasu is calling! Do you want to answer?
With a bit of reluctance Saruhiko hit accept and waited, sliding his headset on as he plugged the cord into the jack on the side of his laptop. It wasn't the first time he had ever spoken with other players but it had been quite awhile. The last time he had done that had been when the site's creator, a man named Hisui Nagare, invited the top ten to chat about the new leveling system that saw them jump from J-Rank, what had been the highest, to the status of Kings.
The top ten list were the Kings of the game, many of which dominated one aspect of the site and held the highest scores for that certain section. Saruhiko's area had always been the problem solving games and games that required brain power to complete. To name a few others the sites fourth highest player had a fascination for the games that involved puzzles, and the man who held the number three position had a love for the first person shooters and violent games that were streamed.
Saruhiko hadn't been kidding when he said that Jungle was a site for anything and everything.
After the call audio had connected he slunk back further into his corner of the internet cafe, eyes darting to the windows on the other side of the room, a study pour of rain pounded the pavement outside and the glass that separated the room from the elements. In a way, he felt such weather was fitting for the type of day he was having.
“Hello?”
Stirring from his thoughts, Saruhiko adjusted the microphone on the headset and turned the volume up, eyes raking over the other player's profile as he returned the greeting, albeit a bit quietly.
“Sorry in advance if the call quality is a bit shitty, it's pouring on my side of town.”
He snorted, “it's raining here, too.”
“I'm definitely glad it's already eight and I don't have to leave my house, no way would I want to go outside in this.” The man on the other end of the phone laughed, a sound sickly sweet to Saruhiko's ears. “Anyway, I should probably properly introduce myself, I’m Yata Misaki. But please only call me Yata!” There was a muffled sound on the other side of the line that sounded a lot like ”I can't believe I said that.”
“Misaki?” Saruhiko mumbled, partially in need of clarification and well, to be completely honest, he found it a bit humorous. What mother hates her son so much that she gives him a girls name? As soon as that thought crossed his mind he remembered how he got his own name and instantly felt his stomach churn. Okay...well my father hated me enough to name me something like Saruhiko...I suppose we have something in common.
“Please don't call me that,” the other man growled though the noise came out with a hint of laughter in it. “Anyway, is your name your screen name or what?”
“Yeah, it's Fushimi Saruhiko.” He confirmed.
“So, Saruhiko then? Well it's nice to unofficially meet you,” there was a brief pause, in which the other person coughed awkwardly. “Sorry, I’m kinda bad at talking to new people.”
“Then why did you want to talk?” Saruhiko deadpanned as he clicked on Jungle's home page, watching the leader boards shuffle for a moment before they settled again.
KINGS OF THE JUNGLE!
1. Hisui Nagare- Creator of Jungle
2. Sukuna Gojou- 2,458,900 Jungle Points
3. Suoh Mikoto- 2,375,089 Jungle Points
4. Munakata Reisi- 2,298,071 Jungle Points
5. Iwafune Tenkei- 2,160,693 Jungle Points
6. Fushimi Saruhiko- 2,145,896 Jungle Points
7. Mishakuji Yukari- 2,120,749 Jungle Points
8. Douhan Hirasaka- 1,985,521 Jungle Points
9. Adolf K. Weismann- 1,967,432 Jungle Points
10. Kotosaka- Gate Keeper (If you want to make the list, you have to go through him first! Only nine players have beaten him since Jungle launched. Think you have what it takes? Have 1.5 million Jungle Points or more? Here's an
FAQ
on how to challenge Kotosaka in an all or nothing battle for either the status of a King or all of your points!)
Saruhiko cringed as he remembered how annoying beating Kotosaka- who was nothing more than an animated parrot that had the answers to all of the games and would solve each in twenty seconds if the player didn't beat them to the punch- was. Needless to say it had been easy for him to beat the list's permanent gate keeper, but he hadn't exactly been prepared to lose all of his points either.
“Well...I don't know if I’m honest, I was just really bored and I kinda wanted to talk to the guy who beat the crap out of me at the cube game.” Yata chuckled, not even that could mask the embarrassment that clearly leaked into his voice. “It's kind of amazing how good you are, you're kind of amazing, I mean.”
“Thanks,” Saruhiko mumbled quietly into the mic, not doting on the praise at all but finding it a bit uplifting. Out of habit he made a grab for his coffee, frowning when the liquid turned out to be nothing more than cold. Cold coffee was another thing he couldn't stand.
“Hey Saruhiko? How did you get that many Jungle points by the way?”
“I've been playing since the site launched,” he answered as he tapped on the lid of the coffee cup, longing to get up and get it refilled but being stopped by the cord that connected his headset to the computer.
“Were you one of the beta testers?”
“No, although a few others on the top ten list were.”
“So you're really going to help me get better, right? That wasn't just a mean trick?”
“No, I’ll help you, I guess.” Saruhiko replied as he tilted his head back, eyes raking over the ceiling as he focused all of his attention on the discussion he was having. He hated the way it made him feel invisible, he hadn't realized just how long it had been since he had had a conversation with another person. Now that he thought about it, it had been over a month since he had communicated with anyone- other than the woman he bought his coffee from.
That clearly wasn't healthy, but he supposed it was no worse than the other things he did- or rather didn't do.
“You know what I think this is, Saruhiko?” Yata said gleefully, and as Saruhiko glanced down at the computer screen and clicked on the other man's profile he could swear he could see the other man's smile from across the line.
“What?”
“The start of a beautiful friendship, what do ya say?”
Friendship.
He had never had a friend before, he wasn't sure how that sort of thing was supposed to work. He wanted to say no and hang up, wanted to block the other man and log off for the day and sulk in the corner of his favorite cafe but something inside him stirred, something inside of his mind told him to reach out and take that offer. And even though it terrified him- the mere thought of getting close to someone and then being forgotten again- he knew that a chance like this may never come again.
If he died right now the world would keep turning and nothing would change at all. Not for anyone. This offer, this invitation of companionship- despite the fact it was nothing more than a voice behind a microphone at the time- was too tempting to pass up.
“Friendship, huh?”
“Yep, I can tell you and I are going to get along really well already. You've got to be the coolest guy I know, and the fact you're willing to help someone like me...well...that's a big deal for me. I don't really have a lot of friends or anything and I don't talk to a lot of people but that's because I don't really have anything in common with most people. Ya know? For some reason, and I’m sorry if this is weird, but you just seem interesting to me, Saruhiko. I want to get to know you.”
He wants to get to know me?
“So...what do you say?”
More like what else could I say....
“Sure.”
“You mean it?” There was a loud cheer on the other line, quickly followed my a mumbled apology. “Awesome, well hey, I have to log off for a bit so I can eat dinner. If you're still on later do you wanna talk again?”
“Sure,” Saruhiko repeated as he stared at his computer screen, studying Yata's profile with inquisitive eyes as he gathered every piece of info in his mind and tried his best to remember it. In case that this too was fleeting, though he'd never own up to that.
“All right, well I'll talk to you later, Saruhiko!”
“Yeah, talk to you later.”
When the line clicked dead, he briefly wondered if he'd actually ever hear from the other man again but something told him- something he had no reason to believe but couldn't stop himself from doing so- that Yata would definitely call back. For some reason or another he wasn't like the other people Saruhiko had met, he didn't just see a sad boy that hid behind an emotionless mask. He saw Saruhiko.
Without even knowing it, his lips twitched upwards into a small smile.
Yatagarasu is now your friend!
“Friend...huh?”