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Sam had always known it was too good to be true.
Getting out of the Cage, being Topside with his brother. Dean had risked everything to give him a second chance at life. Even with the year of being soulless, the Leviathans, the Trials, all the shit life constantly dumped on them, every day was full of life’s flawed beauty. Because he was allowed to be with Dean again.
Dean. His perfect, gorgeous, awesome big brother. By some kind of miracle (the reason Sam secretly believed God really must still be out there somewhere) he loved Sam back. Not long after getting his soul back, in a moment of weakness, Sam had pressed his lips to Dean’s. Dean had kissed him back and the rest was history.
It never made any sense for Dean to love him. But he did. Sam knew he wasn’t good enough, was forever broken beyond repair, but Dean didn’t seem to care. When he had been hallucinating Lucifer after his Wall fell down, it was one of the many reasons he had trouble telling what was real and what wasn’t. Because Dean loving him back should have been a fantasy; God knows he’d spent half his life imagining it.
So every moment spent with Dean was like his own little miracle. Every kiss. Every touch. Every move Dean made inside of him while groaning Sam’s name huskily. Every night spent wrapped in each other’s arms.
Sam took every chance he got to tell Dean just how much he loved him: more than the world, more than his own life, more than everything; in ways both spoken and unspoken. Dean always made a big deal about Sam being a sentimental girl, but Sam didn’t miss the way the tips of Dean’s ears would turn a rosy pink.
He wishes he would have told Dean more often now.
A tiny voice in the back of his mind that sounds suspiciously familiar whispers,You’re kidding yourself. Maybe you never left the Cage at all. This is where you belong, isn’t it?
Yeah… it was all too good to be true… wasn’t it?
Lucifer caresses his face tenderly.