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For the first time in what seemed like ages, Woodstone Manor was quiet.
Almost...too quiet. No guests bustling about, none of the other ghosts wandering the halls, or staying up late watching TV. Even the weather was calm – no howling wind to make the old foundation rattle, no rumbles of thunder or rain pelting the windows.
So many souls in this house, and yet not a single sound to be heard anywhere.
Frankly, he didn’t like it.
Not that Isaac wanted a bunch of disruption when people were trying to sleep, but there still needed to be some sign of life. Chalk it up to his time in the military, perhaps – the quiet nights were always the most unnerving. No chance for rest, always had to be extra alert and attentive to the slightest noise, in case something went wrong. In case he needed to be at the ready to fight.
The quiet also meant he had to spend time with his racing, wandering thoughts. And boy, did he have quite a few of them running through his mind tonight. Thoughts of Flower, and her recent departure. Of Thor, with his pain and grief. He should’ve known his surprisingly good mood from earlier today couldn’t last.
Of course, there was one other person on his mind tonight. Someone who was always foremost in his thoughts in general.
Nigel.
He glanced over at the man in question. Nigel was currently sound asleep. His arms and legs were tucked in on himself, soft little snores escaping his mouth, as he lay next to Isaac
Well, not right next to him. This was a king-sized bed, after all. Just enough space left between them for them both to stretch out and move about as needed, without crowding or rolling into each other.
Still, he was here.
Isaac sighed as he glanced back up at the ceiling. He was in danger of becoming clingy, he knew it. He’d very nearly offered to accompany Nigel to that day’s ant club meeting, only to reconsider upon seeing Thor accompany Nigel and Pete outside.
It wasn’t that he didn’t sympathize with Thor’s current emotional state. Quite the contrary, really – he understood far too well.
“Nigel...is no longer with us.”
Isaac shivered. Frightening, really, how easily those five words came flooding back to him the other night. It felt like some kind of cruel cosmic joke, honestly, one he couldn’t blame on Jenkins this time.
A ghost had been sucked off. Worse, it was one of their own. For the second time in as many years, Isaac had to briefly imagine the possibility that Nigel was the ghost in question. Had to briefly think about all the things he would’ve never been able to do with him, to say to him, the afterlife they’d never get to have together. And after they’d just become engaged!
Then Nigel came barreling through the door, and Isaac had never felt so relieved. Unfortunately, their emotional reunion was brief, for it was shortly afterward that they, along with the other ghosts, learned Flower had been the one who’d moved on.
Oh, sure, he’d tried to act nonchalant about her departure, trying to focus instead on his engagement party. Flower had managed to escape this purgatory at long last! She’d achieved the one thing all the ghosts wanted! She was happy and content at long last!
Right?
The more Isaac tried to convince himself of that fact, however, the less certain he was. Just as he couldn’t bear the thought of losing Nigel, he also couldn’t imagine leaving him behind. And the others! What would Hetty do without him around? What would good ol’ Bangs be without Pony around? How would Samantha be able to promote his book without his input?
And if he missed out on seeing his own musical come to life…
Yes, while he’d be loathe to admit it aloud, the thought of losing anyone else in their group, or leaving them behind, was enough to cause another unpleasant sensation in his abdomen. A familiar absence, a sense of something missing. Something he hadn’t felt since his sisters went away.
He didn’t leave Nigel’s side the rest of that night. Or these last few days, for that matter. Lucky for him today was Wednesday. Following Sam around and observing her interactions with Kevin, as well as the debate over the TV, proved a very welcome distraction until Nigel returned from ant club that afternoon, albeit a little earlier than usual. He still felt that tug of relief upon seeing him walk through the door.
Now here they were, first night in their new room, sharing their new bed, and they were...keeping their distance. They’d each managed to pick their respective sides, Nigel near the wall, Isaac near the door. When the time came to retire to bed, they bid each other a pleasant good night, and retreated to their sections. And that was that.
Isaac frowned as he placed a hand in the gap between them. Was it his imagination, or did the distance seem bigger? Nigel looked so far away.
Always the way, wasn’t it? One barrier after another. Opposite sides of a battlefield, property lines, living quarters. If it wasn’t physical distance keeping them apart it was some fight or disagreement about things that didn’t really matter in the long run. Like that stupid day bed.
Isaac clenched a fist in frustration. It was all quite absurd, really. Surely their luck couldn’t last forever? How much longer was he going to deny himself the opportunity to get closer? Did he learn nothing from observing Thor these last few days?
He chanced another glance at Nigel. Still sleeping peacefully.
This was going to be a long night.
Slide over. That’s all you have to do. One simple move to the right.
Nothing. Isaac began to briefly wonder if he’d been somehow paralyzed. Could that even happen to ghosts?
Besides, he had to admit, this extra room was rather welcome. He found himself wondering how he’d ever thought that tiny little settee was comfortable.
Nigel probably welcomed the extra room, too. He’d seen that cot in the shed, the one he’d been invited to share once upon a time. Nigel was right, it could indeed fit two, but even then, it would’ve been a snug fit.
Funny how quickly things changed. Just one short year ago, the very idea of sharing any sleeping arrangements with Nigel was cause for panic. He could just barely remember the last time he’d shared a room with anyone, and that was all the way back when he was a child. Even then, though, he still had his own space. When he was in the military, he had his own sleeping quarters by virtue of being the captain.
For God’s sakes, he’d never even shared a bed with Beatrice! His wife!
Things didn’t change upon his becoming a ghost, either. Two hundred plus years at Woodstone, and he still always had his own bed, if not his own room, even when he had to bunk up. Of course he’d need to adjust to sharing a bed with Nigel. Probably why he’d reacted as he did to that earlier invitation.
That wasn’t the only reason, and you know it.
He let out a soft sigh as he turned his gaze back towards the ceiling. Yes, he did know. The two of them, on a tiny cot, Nigel so close that Isaac could breathe him in, feel his body pressed against his own, his voice vibrating in Isaac’s ear as they were both able to hold each other, touch each other….
No, he’d absolutely never lingered on such thoughts or fantasies, never been kept awake by them. And he absolutely wasn’t thinking of such things now. Not him. No siree.
God, he really should just get up and take a walk around the mansion at this point. Maybe try some yoga? That seemed to put him out pretty fast earlier…
He let out an audibly frustrated huff.
“Penny for your thoughts.”
Isaac flinched. He sharply glanced over at Nigel, who was looking at him with one eye open, his mouth quirked in a half smile.
He propped himself up on one elbow. “Oh. You’re awake.”
“I have yet to fall asleep.” As if to prove his point, Nigel stifled a yawn with his hand. He shifted so his arm was resting underneath his head, as he fully turned to look at Isaac.
“…you’ve been awake this whole time?” Isaac’s stomach sank a little at the thought.
“I couldn’t sleep knowing you weren’t comfortable.” At Isaac’s surprise, Nigel explained further. “I was a leftenant, remember? I can tell when someone’s not at ease.”
Great. “Apologies,” he began carefully. “It seems I’m...having a bit of trouble sleeping tonight.”
Nigel placed a hand in the space between them. “Would you care to discuss it?”
“It’s nothing,” Isaac said, shaking his head.
Nigel flashed a reassuring smile. “I doubt that.”
“No, really, I’m fine.” Isaac waved dismissively in Nigel’s direction. “I took a nap earlier today. Threw off my entire routine. It’s nothing to concern yourself over.”
Nigel grabbed Isaac’s hand, tugging on it so that Isaac had to look at him. “Why don’t you let me decide that?”
Isaac looked at their joined hands, watching as Nigel began rubbing gentle circles with his thumb. He sucked in a breath. “...all right,” he began.
Nigel pulled his hand away and patted the bed. Isaac lay back down, their positions now mirroring each other. Isaac opened and closed his mouth a couple times, before he finally spoke.
“I don’t even know where to begin, honestly,” he admitted, letting out a nervous laugh. “So many things I can’t stop thinking about.”
“Flower.” Nigel’s voice was solemn.
Isaac’s eyes flicked up to his. “Beg pardon?”
“You’re thinking about Flower, yes?”
“...uh-huh...” Isaac blinked quickly, his gaze focused on a spot past Nigel’s shoulder..
“I am sorry for your loss,” Nigel said, his voice full of sympathy. “I didn’t know her all that well, but I can see she meant a lot to everyone here. If her memorial was any indication, she seemed to be quite the character!” He let out a small, affectionate chuckle.
Isaac echoed his laugh. “She was indeed.”
“Poor Thorfinn. He was so quiet at ant club today.”
Isaac whipped his head back towards Nigel. “Oh?”
Nigel nodded. “He hoped his usual routine would prove a welcome distraction.” He lowered his gaze, his voice quieter now. “It did not.”
“I can’t say I’m surprised,” Isaac said. “I’d actually planned to join you today, but then I saw him and...” He shrugged.
“Too close to home,” Nigel finished.
“Yes.” He responded with what he hoped was a grateful look.
Nigel moved his hand back between them again. “I understand. I had the same thought, remember?”
Isaac ignored the sudden sting of tears. “It’s just...if I ever...if something ever happened...”
“It’s all right, Isaac. I’m right here.” This time, Nigel reached out to briefly brush Isaac’s cheek with his fingers. Isaac closed his eyes, allowing himself a moment to lean into the touch.
His eyes flew open upon feeling Nigel’s hand slowly begin to pull back. He looked concerned and confused. “Is there something else troubling you?” Nigel asked.
Truly, it was a marvel, the way he could read him like a book. “Honestly, it seems such a silly concern given everything else….” he said.
“If its keeping you awake, it’s not silly,” Nigel pointed out.
Isaac nodded as he traced the top of the bed covers with a finger. How would he begin to explain this current worry?
Best to just come right out with it. He sucked in a breath.
“I’ve...never shared a bed with anyone before. For any reason.”
Nigel’s brows shot up. “Really?”
Isaac shook his head.
“Not even your wife?”
“Separate rooms,” Isaac explained.
Nigel’s eyes widened. “So that’s why you’ve been so hesitant...” he murmured, as if all the puzzle pieces were finally coming together.
“That’s part of it, yes,” Isaac began. “But -” He gazed again at the bedsheets, suddenly fascinated by the flowery patterns.
“But what?” Nigel’s voice cut in.
Isaac glanced back up at him. “I’m not used to sleeping next to another person. Especially not someone I….” The word was right on the tip of his tongue, but he was already revealing far too much as it was tonight. He gave a half shrug. “I’m just...nervous, I guess.”
Nigel responded with a small smile. “If it makes you feel any better, I too am...rather nervous.”
“You?” Isaac gaped at him. “But – you’ve slept with...er...next to...other people before.” He wasn’t going to get more specific than that. Last thing they needed right now was to have certain names on their minds.
Nigel nodded. “Yes. But this is different for me, too. I wasn’t engaged to any of those other people, after all.”
“Oh.” He hadn’t considered that.
Nigel took Isaac’s hand in his again, this time giving it a gentle squeeze. “It’s true I’ve made no secret of the fact I want us to grow closer,” he said. “But honestly, Isaac, I just want to be with you. Whether we’re taking a stroll, or sharing a bed, or becoming engaged, or...” He grew rather bashful at that point, a reaction Isaac found quite endearing. “...other things...as long as I get to do all that with you, that’s all that matters.”
Now Isaac flashed his own small smile. “I want to be with you, too.”
“And you are. We are engaged, after all!” He grinned, and Isaac couldn’t help matching his reaction. “Everything else will happen in good time.” He placed a kiss to Isaac’s knuckles as he spoke, a gesture that sent another slight, yet far more pleasurable, shiver down his spine.
Nigel clearly noticed the reaction, too. “Are you cold?” he asked.
“A little,” Isaac lied.
“Would you...like to be a little closer?” Nigel tugged at Isaac’s hand as he spoke.
Isaac nodded, slow yet certain. “I would.”
At that, Nigel smiled, and the two of them slid towards each other. He made the first move, tentatively placing his hand at the crook of Isaac’s elbow. Isaac, meanwhile, reached his own hand out, letting it rest on Nigel’s waist. Another tingle went through his body as Nigel’s hand slowly started running the length of his arm.
“Is this all right?” he asked, the hush of his voice seeming to echo in the otherwise quiet room.
Isaac nodded again, more certain this time. “Yes.” He began to run his thumb over the soft fabric of Nigel’s coat. A small gesture, but the bright smile he received had emboldened him. He leaned forward, his lips ever so gently brushing Nigel’s. In response, Nigel gripped his arm, and they shared another, firmer kiss, the kind neither wanted to end.
He was rewarded with a soft hum when they parted, and their foreheads touched, allowing them a moment to enjoy this newfound intimacy.
“Tell me about your day,” Nigel said then, as he resumed stroking Isaac’s arm. “What did I miss here while I was at Ant Club?”
Isaac grinned. “Oh, well, let’s see…Sam and Jay had a disagreement over the placement of a new television.”
Nigel laughed. “Oh, dear. And how did that play out?”
“Not sure yet, but I’m guessing it won’t end well,” Isaac said, earning another hearty laugh from Nigel. “What about you? Did Ant Club still go okay, even with...you know?”
“Actually, yes.” Nigel said. “We potentially discovered a new clan!” His eyes lit up as he shared this news. Isaac couldn’t help but smile at his excitement. “Well, I think it’s a new clan, Peter seems to think they’re connected to one of the other ant clans. We asked Thorfinn for his input, and he claimed to be neutral, but I think he sides with Peter.”
Isaac hummed. That sounded like Thor, all right. “So what happens now?”
“We’ll discuss it further at our next meeting. I’m quite certain it’s new, though. There are ways you can tell the difference...”
Isaac was pretty sure there was a difference, but he never got to hear the explanation, for he was soon out like a light. He’d never truly realized just how soothing Nigel’s voice was until now...
Early the next morning, Isaac awoke to find himself entangled with Nigel. Arms around waists, legs crossed at the knee, their heads still touching.
There was that tug of relief again.
He closed his eyes again, pulling Nigel closer.