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There he is, sprawled across his bed. Upside down, head hanging off the side while he holds his phone above his face. Doomscrolling, probably, given his blank expression. Definitely bored.
Any admittance of HiMERU's presence will startle Shiina. He almost chuckles to himself at the thought, the allure of mischief easing his discomfort. He considers blaring a particular meme sound he keeps hearing from Oukawa's phone (sent by Mikejima, no doubt).
Or…he can leave, of course. After all, his mind is reeling with questions so sacred he dare not voice internally, let alone ask. Yet here he is, contemplating his odds.
Then, as if mocking his lack of agency, the phone slips from Shiina's hands. A voice note from Amagi plays during the descent, thankfully muffled so HiMERU manages to screen out his grating voice and doubtlessly crass comment.
Amagi.
Of course it isn't HiMERU who gets to decide his own fortune.
“ACK-!” Shiina shouts as the phone lands on his forehead. He recoils in pain, head drooping further, phone sliding to the floor. Now able to see behind him, Shiina starts at the sight of HiMERU standing in his doorway.
“WHAT!? AGGHHH!”
“HiMERU is –”
“Wait! Wait – give me a minute!”
Shiina rolls onto the floor then shoots up with a bewildered expression. He's wearing pyjamas and his hair is loose. Daylight is still streaming through his window.
“HiMERU~! It's so good to see you. What brings you here?”
“HiMERU hasn't seen you since the weekend and Amagi has refused to share your whereabouts. HiMERU was beginning to get worried,” HiMERU says with a sigh.
Shiina tilts his head slightly. “It's only Tuesday. And why didn't you text –” He interrupts himself mid-sentence to reach for a tissue from his bedside table, and sneezes. “Aaghhhh, I'm so fed up with this! I've been stuck in here all week with a stupid cold!”
“It's only Tuesday,” HiMERU comments cheekily. But Shiina is too engrossed in his rant to hear.
“It's so boring! Hinata and Hiiro get to go out to the new restaurant opening down the street. We were planning this for weeks! I checked the menu beforehand and everything. I knew what I was gonna order. This is so sad,” he whines.
“HiMERU wouldn't be surprised if they insist on bringing the meals home to share with you.”
Shiina frowns at this. He takes in a deep breath and folds his arms before replying. “I asked them not to. The food will be cold when they get back, and re-heating will alter the texture. Then they won't be eating what the chef envisioned. I won't ruin their experience. And I can't stand in the way of good cuisine.”
HiMERU can't suppress his smile. “HiMERU applauds your dedication to the art, but your dilemma is preventable. HiMERU has already mentioned sharing the meal at home. However, since you've vetoed that idea, he will propose some alternatives. You can skip the event and all share a home-cooked meal. Or you can join them despite your sickness since you're in the recovery phase. Or –”
“Honestly, HiMERU! I'm not going out there to get other people sick. And I want Hinata and Hiiro to enjoy their evening without me dragging them down. Besides, it's too late to do anything now!” Shiina says firmly.
“If your mind was set the whole time, HiMERU takes it that you complain just for the fun of it?”
Shiina opens his mouth slightly as if to retort, but decides against it. He looks away and blushes. The sight is familiar, comforting. Even though Shiina is too modest and too self-conscious for it to be anything but an inevitability. Still, this was their language and he enjoyed it. HiMERU's gentle provocation, Shiina's candid responses.
Amagi might be able to effect the same with a few vulgar words, but HiMERU doesn't dwell on the thought.
He's missed Shiina. And it's only Tuesday.
“Uhhmm,” Shiina begins. “Did you want anything? I have some seltzers in the mini fridge. And I can make a sandwich if you're hungry~!” His voice is bright despite the lingering rasp of sickness.
“No, thank you. HiMERU should be the one taking care of you.” Think about yourself, Shiina. “Do you have an ice pack? HiMERU is concerned about the phone's impact.”
Shiina reacts as though this is new information, blinking slowly. He moves a hand to his forehead, just a little too quickly. “Owowow! I should take care of that.” He skips over to his desk, pulling open a few drawers in panic. It’s a disorganized effort and he misses several compartments.
“Ice pack, Shiina.”
“I have ice cubes in the freezer.” He shuffles over to the large mini-fridge and yanks it open. There is a short pause before he turns around, wide-eyed.
“HiMERU.”
“Yes?”
“What do I do with these ice cubes?”
“Let HiMERU help with that.” Finally, he pulls the door closed and takes his first step inside.
And with that, HiMERU realizes that he was waiting for an impetus to enter. The recognition itself cascades into an overwhelming sense of relief.
He feels so sure of himself as he pulls off his jacket. Confident as he packs a dozen or so ice cubes into it, forming a ball. He parts Shiina's hair and presses it gently against his forehead. Shiina looks surprised, but remains frozen in place.
“You can hold it there for now. Fifteen or so minutes. Then do it again a little later. This should keep the pain to a minimum and reduce swelling.”
Shiina's hand brushes against HiMERU's as he moves to grip the makeshift ice pack. “Thank you, HiMERU! I wouldn't have thought about doing that!”
“HiMERU was only doing what anyone else would have.”
“Nahahaha~ Don't be so humble. There’s a lot of stuff in here we could’ve used instead. You're such a gentleman, using your jacket and everything~”
HiMERU doesn't know if he's blushing. Maybe. His mind is atypically blank.
Shiina returns to sit at the edge of his bed and pats the space next to him.
“HiMERU thinks…there is no need for him to be here anymore.”
Shiina frowns slightly. “Do you have to go? I'm going to die of boredom if you leave. It's so sad being home alone when all my friends are having fun.”
“Okay…HiMERU can't refuse your request if you make such a pitiful display.”
Shiina's eyes light up. He smiles a smile worth the entire world, yet all HiMERU can offer is his presence. And even that HiMERU struggles to give. He settles on one of the corners of the bed, trying to make as much distance between them as possible.
“Why was the door open earlier? Did your roommates forget to close it on the way out?” HiMERU asks.
“Oh, no. It's for ventilation. It's better than sitting in stale, sick air.”
HiMERU nods. “That's good, Shiina. What else are you doing to take care of yourself?”
“You should call me Niki.”
It catches HiMERU off-guard. Of course it does. His friend is open and straightforward...but unpredictable, in a good way. Shiina may not realize it, but this is a huge request of HiMERU. One which doesn't align with HiMERU's principles. And he isn't ready.
“HiMERU can't do that.”
His friend doesn't seem bothered by the response. “I've been drinking lots of soup. There's a massive container of it in the fridge. Normally it'd be done by now but my appetite is ruined because of the cold.”
“Did you make that yourself?”
“Rinne dropped it off a couple of days ago. Not sure who made it, though. You won't believe how terrible he is at cooking. You'd think he'd learn a thing or two from me but he hasn't! If he spent less time messing around and gambling he'd pick up some actual skills.” There is something else he mutters under his breath that HiMERU doesn't catch.
Amagi…
The tangent is a harsh reminder. Who does HiMERU think he is? Who is HiMERU to desecrate their bond with his own frivolous desires? Despite these thoughts, he is curious about one other thing, out of concern for his friend.
He dares to ask.
“Shiina…why does Amagi keep sexting HiMERU?”
His friend snorts. He gets up to chuck HiMERU's jacket and half-melted ice into the freezer. “Why don't you ask him yourself? I don't know what goes on in his head.”
“Ah…but HiMERU was simply worried that you were unaware. HiMERU doesn't want to get between you two.”
“You don't?"
It might be the lack of a jacket, it might be shock, but HiMERU feels cold. “HiMERU doesn't intend to cause trouble.”
Niki fixes him with a stare that pierces right through him. HiMERU suddenly feels like he should leave. That he's crossed too far into unfamiliar territory. But he can't even recognize the boundaries anymore and he doesn't know the way out.
There is a long gap before Niki speaks again, as if he's put a considerable amount of thought into his next words. “I know. But he just does what he wants. It's not like anything I say will stop him.”
Suddenly Niki is standing right in front of him.
“Can I kiss you?”
Oh.
“HiMERU? Oh…I'm sorry. Did I get it wrong? Aaahh – don't worry about it. This is so embarrassing! You – you just look. You're. And I thought…” Niki rambles.
Oh.
“I like you.” Niki buries his face in his hands.
Oh.
“Aahhh, this is the end of the line for me. Our unit is doomed. I'll have to pack up and leave the city.” The obvious hyperbole aside, Niki is genuinely worried. He paces to the other end of the room, hands balled into fists, arms swinging.
No.
“Please say something!” he says to the wall.
I like you too.
“Shiina…” It's a massive effort getting the remaining words out. “HiMERU is fond of you. He isn't sure this is appropriate.”
Niki swerves on the balls of his feet and practically stomps back to his bed. He looks a strange mixture of desperate and incensed.
“Can you just say how you feel!? One way or the other! Now isn't the time for pretending. If there's something you want to hold, seize it. If there's something you want to say, shout it. We all have the chance and the power to achieve our greatest desires. Everyone deserves happiness. Even HiMERU. No, even you. We should be honest with each other…and ourselves. That's what makes us Crazy:B.”
“But Amagi–”
“What about Rinne!? Where do you think I got all of that from? I was basically quoting him!”
Oh.
Niki's entire face is red. His forehead from the ice. His nose from the cold. His cheeks from emotion. He's in silly cat pyjamas, hair a disaster.
And he's so cute.
HiMERU finally rises and takes Niki's right hand in his own. “HiMERU would like to kiss you. But he might get sick.”
“Then allow me to be selfish. Let's be sick together.”
Niki doesn't give him the chance to object. But HiMERU wasn't planning to, anyway.
HiMERU is knowledgeable about many things, but not this. So he surrenders. To Niki. To his affection. He feels Niki's fingers along the back of his neck, drawing him closer. HiMERU meets his lips with reluctance, surprised by their warmth and softness. He relaxes and leans in and…makes an involuntary sound, to which Niki responds by embracing him tighter. The gentleness, the passion, the bliss – it all feels unreal. This is what he wants. The statement is so simple yet profound. And he’s surprised to find that he’s already craving more.
I must be crazy.
(image attached)
hey guess what
YOU LOSE !!!! HAHAHAHAA you suck rinne!!!!
yuo owenmrme THREE dinners!!!
make a reservation at thebbistro next week
no, You suck
;)
hahaha
ok ill take you out
DIDNT THINK THISNWOULD HAPPEN DID UOU
i dont mind losing the bet but dont be annoying about it
first dibs doesnt mean anything
im coming for your boyfriend
ok.