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“General!” one of the soldiers of the Shogunate yelled while running towards her. She had just finished the procession of opening up the borders again after the Sakoku decree was lifted. The soldier stopped in front of her and tried to catch his breath.
“What is it? Is there any trouble with the reopening?”
The soldier, still catching his breath, frantically shook his head, swallowed, and said, “No, it’s not that.”
She crossed her arms and said, “Well? Don't keep me waiting; tell me what’s going on.”
“I think we have caught a harbinger.”
Her hands dropped to her side.
The soldier continued, “Well, maybe not catch him; we received reports of someone fighting the garrison in the Kujou encampment; he said he wanted to speak with you, but when we refused, he just kept fighting us! He also said that he was going to destroy the whole encampment and kill all the people inside it if his request was not obeyed. But after we relented, he surrendered willingly.”
She grits her teeth. Those damn harbingers could not do without destruction, could they? First, it was the vision hunt decree, then the civil war, and now this? But more importantly, why does he want to talk with her so badly to the point of being willing to kill people? Do all Fatui Harbingers act like that? She feels this will not end well.
She took a deep breath and nodded. “This is urgent; I will go to the encampment immediately. At the moment, what have you done to him?”
“We asked him to wait for you at Nazuchi Beach and put handcuffs on him.”
“And he complied?”
“Yes, general,” the soldier nodded. Weird, why would a harbinger even comply with such requests? It is almost as if he is trying every way to get her attention and bring her to him, or worse, he is actively toying with her. She was suspicious, and understandably so. The harbinger was presenting himself on a silver platter for her to eat, but she knew it was poison. However, with the lives of her soldiers on the line, she could not hesitate. She walked quickly to the port and boarded the fastest boat to Nazuchi Beach.
It is a cloudy day at Nazuchi Beach, with rain just around the corner. She got off her boat and walked to the sandy beach. Her men told her he was waiting for her in one of the rooms of the abandoned ship on the beach and told her he was tied to a chair, much to his amusement. During the walk, she remembered bitterly that this was the place where the fighting had been just mere weeks ago; the corpses of the dead were not here anymore, but the heavy feeling of death still lingered in the air. She heard once that if a place had been a fighting ground, like war, it would take years for that feeling to dissipate, but sometimes it stayed there permanently. She wondered which one Nazuchi Beach would fit into. She paused for a moment in front of the dendrobium flowers that had bloomed since then; the vibrant red color contrasted with the light brown sands and the green grass. The flowers were lovely, and the more lovely the flower, the bloodier and more brutal the battlefield it grew from. She had never seen dendrobium this red and vibrant, and all it needed was blood.
She closes her eyes in silent prayer for those who have passed. For the shogunate, they were soldiers, and just that, to die on the battlefield is expected, sometimes wanted, and even revered. But for her, they were something more; each life lost here was a life that could have been. The soldiers had a life to lead before it was taken away from them here. The laughter they would never have again, the friendships they severed, the relationships they broke, and the future that would never be were buried underneath the sand. At least the vision hunt decree had been repealed, and the country was open. She prays that Inazuma will not let another civil war hit its doorstep. She prays that she will not have to take anyone’s father, mother, brother, sister, friend, or lover ever again.
But the feeling that their deaths—the soldiers under her command—were wasted has started to weigh her down ever since the war ended. Maybe this is the feeling of defeat; the resistance had shown their strength and proved that the Vision Hunt decree was an injustice at best and catastrophic at worst. She and the soldiers under her command had fought hard to prove otherwise, even though some still have doubts in their hearts about the decree—her included, they fully believed that the cause they were fighting was right. The shogun will always have their best interests in mind. That was not the case, at least not fully. The Vision Hunt decree was just another machination of that traitorous foster father of hers and the Fatui. And one of the harbingers is here now. She tightened her fist; she would have killed him if she had the chance.
She had talked with Guuji Yae after the war about her feelings about the war; she did not say much, but if she were talking with the Guuji, she might as well be an open book for the kitsune. She told her, or rather, Guuji read from her face and mannerisms, that she was feeling guilty about the war. It is as if their deaths were for nothing, she thought. She had not yet fully grasped the new meaning of eternity the shogun promoted after the war, but even if she did, the dead would stay dead, and she could not do anything to change it except regret what had transpired. Even if she had learned of every single ambition and every single vision holder that she had wronged, she could not change the past. The Guuji advised her not to worry too much and instead to focus on the shogun. Remember how she saved you from falling off that cliff, she said.
The Guuji also stated that if the shogun had not saved her life that day, she would not have been in this position in the first place, let alone having a family. If the Kujou had not taken her, who knows where she would be at this point in her life? Alone? Probably. Dead? Most likely. She also told Sara that it was not her fault and she should stop thinking too much about it because she was simply following orders. Though she still has a lot of trouble with that last part, how is that not her fault? If only she were smarter, she could have unraveled Takayuki’s plot way ahead of time and saved countless lives. If only she were stronger, she could have defeated that damn Signora Harbinger by herself and convinced the Shogun of Takayuki’s betrayal. If only she were more confident in herself and her gut feelings, the deaths under and because of her could have been prevented.
She felt heavy, and the sand beneath her felt like quicksand, ready to drown her in the graveyard she herself had made. If only she—
She exhaled sharply. The thoughts she just had before had been plaguing her mind for the last week or so, and by the looks of it, they would not dissipate anytime soon, maybe ever. It must be the main disadvantage of being the general of war, she thought. She must always carry the dead wherever she goes now, whether she likes it or not, awake or in her now frequent nightmares. It was her duty—nothing more, nothing less. She approached the place where the shogunate soldiers had been holding him hostage, though she was pretty sure he could escape or break out anytime he wanted. There were a handful of soldiers guarding the entrance door, maybe ten in total. She gestured to the two soldiers guarding the entrance to stay put while she called the other eight to come to where she was standing, quite a bit away from the entrance door. The soldiers greeted her with a salute, and she told them to be at ease.
“So,” she started. “What do you know about him?”
The soldiers looked at each other warily.
One of the soldiers, Hayata, if she remembers correctly, said, “Well, for starters, he doesn’t eat. Every time we give him something to eat, he just flat-out refuses! He said he did not need them, or something like that."
Another soldier, Fuyuki, nodded. “Normally that won’t strike us as strange; I mean, maybe he got a big stomach. But it has been hours since we detained him, and I’m pretty sure any human being would have their stomach growl after being in captivity for hours. For Shogun’s sake, he doesn’t even drink!”
She placed her finger beneath her chin. So he can go hours without eating or drinking and still be fine; what is she dealing with? Are the Fatui Harbingers simply built differently than the rest? Or maybe, just maybe, he’s not human? Not fully, at least; would that even be possible? She had seen the power that comes from delusions, and maybe this was just the next, more extreme step?
“That’s still a start; what else?”
“Um,” the younger soldier, Haruichi, hesitated. "He... looks like the Shogun?”
That earned a sharp glare from the tengu general.
“Well, it’s just that he reminds me of her! I am not the only one who thinks that, right?” He looked around, and the rest of the men nodded. “See? I think he just looks a lot like her! Maybe it’s just a coincidence; I do not mean to insult the almighty Narukami Ogosho, God of Thunder; forgive me!” He said this while clasping his hands together.
She sighed, waved a hand dismissively, and said, “Forgiven, but next time do not utter something like that ever again. To compare the excellency herself to some lowly harbinger is not only rude; it will get you into trouble, and I will not be there to defend you. Understood?”
“Understood!” the soldiers said in uniform.
“Anything else? Did he tell you the reason why he’s so insistent on talking to me?”
The soldiers looked at each other, and all of them shook their heads. “No, every time we asked him, he dismissed us entirely, saying that we don’t need to know, or worse, telling us that if we poke around even a little bit more, he would end us right then and there.”
Damn it, she cursed to herself. She barely got any information on the man, and she had to talk to him to save her men from unnecessary death. Will things even go well? Would she still even be alive if she continued? She needed a plan; maybe she could–
“I think he calls himself the balladeer.”
That breaks her line of thought. “Say again?”
“The harbinger inside, I think I heard him saying it to himself, that he’s the balladeer," said Daisuke, the quietest one of the group.
Her hands became cold in an instant. The balladeer? The sixth of the Fatui Harbinger? She barely got out alive after confronting Signora, the eighth of the harbingers, and now he, who was ranked higher than her, wanted to confront her?
Any hope and plan she would get out of this alive was thrown out the window.
Well, there is nothing better to do than get it done as soon as possible. She swallowed hard and nodded to the men, “Thank you for the information; I will talk to him now. Guard the perimeter as I do so. Do not come inside if I don’t give you any signals.”
“Understood!” They all said it in unison.
She walked until she had reached the entrance door of one of the rooms on the abandoned ship. The guards gave her a quick salute. She stood in front of the door and took five deep breaths to calm herself down. This situation had developed in such a way that it reminded her of what had just transpired in The Tenshukaku a week prior, where she had to face Signora by herself while the Shogun just stood there and watched as she got pummeled down and beaten. In some ways, this is worse than that; she is completely alone, in the location of one of her deepest scars, against an opponent who may be more dangerous and powerful than she has ever faced.
She nodded to the guards guarding the entrance. “Good luck, general,” one of them said. The door was opened, and steeling herself, she walked inside.
He was sitting on a chair, or rather, tied to it, in one of the corners of the room. There are candles inside, illuminating the dark space, though just barely. At least she could clearly see his figure. She walked further inside; in front of him was a table, and on it she saw an apple and a glass of water. It must be a vain attempt at giving him something to eat and drink, she thought.
“Well, well, well.” He said it with a small grin on his face. “The general is finally here.”
She walked closer to him with a glare. “Balladeer,” she spat. “What do you want from me?”
“It’s Scaramouche, if you please.”
“I don't please. Especially for the likes of you.”
He sat straighter and stared at her back, and although she was the one standing, she felt she was the one being examined. Now that she could clearly see him, he really did look like the Shogun; they weren’t kidding; his eyes, although they are a different shade from the Shogun, reflect the same amount of authority. His hair, if it were longer and framed his face correctly, would also resemble the shogun. I’ll be damned, she thought to herself. She owed Daisuke an apology.
"You're staring," he said. “Do I resemble your beloved God?”
She almost cut her tongue for words. She had to be careful with him; he would only dissect her further if she couldn’t keep herself straight.
“I’d take that as a yes.”
More silence.
“How is the reopening going?”
"Why do I have to answer any of your questions?" she replied harshly.
“Oohh, salty today. Did you wake up on the wrong side of the bed?” he asked. “Or, are you still hurting after the war?”
“A war you create.”
“A war the Shogun creates.”
She took a step towards him. “Be careful of what you say,” she said with a glare.
“Oh, but am I wrong? With her idea of eternity, it would not even matter in the end, would it? What is the worth of a few lives if, at the end, you receive what you always wanted? But look who took the fall in the end; it was you , general. The Shogun ordered you to burn down the house, but now the blame rests on you, the arsonist.”
The balladeer broke the handcuff with a small gesture; she took a step back and gripped her bow tightly. He, meanwhile, took his hands, intertwined them, and put them underneath his chin, his eyes still on hers.
"Someone might think you are just a puppet for the shogun, controlled by her strings with no free will of her own. Pathetic, really.”
“I make my own choices.”
He chuckled. “Did you? Did you really, general?”
“Are you questioning my ability, balladeer? I am a general for the shogunate, and I have always made decisions of my own free will. It is my job to lead and be responsible for the choices that I have made.”
“Tell me,” he said, playing with the apple on the table, twirling it in his hand, “do you have any hobbies of your own? Archery does not count; Takayuki drilled that into you and made it a discipline.”
“How did you—”
“I got it from him myself; it is nothing a few beatings would not fix.”
“You did what to him?!” she shouted while she walked closer to the table.
“Come on, general,” he said, smiling against her glare. “I am sure it is something you wish to do for a long time. Retribution. Against his treatment of yours and his betrayals. I imagine there is some sick corner in your heart that is happy to receive such deplorable news, is there not?”
“No!” she shouts. “Even if he betrayed me and the shogunate, he had raised me; he has cared for me ever since I was a child! To do that to him is not only cruel but also insulting! I am and will always be grateful—”
“You act as if you were defending your own father.”
That throws her off, and her anger gives in to confusion. “What?”
“Takayuki is not your father; he will never be. You were left in the forest to fend off for yourself, don’t you remember?”
“What does it matter if he is not my biological father? He raised me with his own hands; that’s what matters.”
“He did not raise you; he used you. Do you not know the difference?” He scoffed. “Surely you realized it when you confronted him last time? Or maybe that bird brain of yours can't even comprehend that?”
She was silent. He sneered.
“You might think he’s your master, your father, but in reality, he’s only a substitute. And substitutes are only that: substitutes. His existence does not change the fact that you were still abandoned in that forest when you were a child. He is, was, filling a void inside you. But you can’t fill a void; it is called a void for a reason, general.”
That sting. It was always what she had thought back in the farthest corner of her mind. Takayuki is not her father. He will never be. But she was so desperate for a place to belong that she dismissed any negative thoughts regarding the matter. She was so desperate to fill that void with him, Kamaji, and Masahito. Even though she knew Takayuki loved his sons a lot more than her, even though she knows that he doesn’t view her the same as the other kids, even though she knows that he was actively isolating her from others. It did not matter; what mattered was that she had a place to belong, even though she always knew it was a lie and it could crumble at every moment. And it had crumbled, and she chose to ignore it, but she could not do so anymore after it was shoved into her mouth, by a harbinger no less.
“How?” She asked, her voice lower and weaker than she would’ve liked. She tried to reassert herself with another question, raising her voice: “How do you even know that I confronted him? Did you beat it out of him?”
“No. Someone sold you out for something I need.”
She racked her brain for an answer. A traitor? Who was she with at the time other than her adoptive family?
“The traveler?” She tried.
“No again; they are far too chivalrous and kind to do something like that.”
She thought again: Was it someone from the other side? But what happened at the time was too personal and only involved the people of the Shogunate; she couldn’t share her doubts and her clan's wrongdoings with an enemy; that would only make them stronger. Who was it? The Shogun? No, that’s too unlikely. The Guuji? She did have some reservations towards her, but she doesn’t think the Guuji would even—
“It is exactly who you think.” He said this, interrupting her and reading her thoughts as if they were mere words on a page.
“The Guuji?”
“Precisely,” he nods. “She told me everything; your doubts about the vision hunt decree were particularly interesting.”
She reeled at the answer he gave her. The Guuji sold her out? To a harbinger? Sara knew the Guuji didn’t think very highly of her, and she made sure to let her know every time they met, but to give a harbinger such personal information is not only surprising but downright heartbreaking. She knows she isn’t the sharpest; her mannerisms are a bit too blunt, but that’s a betrayal she doesn’t even know how to react to. The Guuji, the Shogun’s most trusted servant, is using her as a bartering tool.
Drowning in her negative thoughts, she took a deep breath to calm herself down. He was getting to her; that’s what he wanted, and his tricks had almost succeeded. She couldn’t think badly of the Guuj; she is the Raiden Shogun’s most entrusted person for a reason. Maybe there are variables that she did not know that forced her to give such personal information to him. She must divert the conversation, lest he erase her trust in the Guuji altogether.
“Are you just here to debate with me?” She asked again, raising her voice.
“I am here because I want to talk with you, general. You piqued my interest; you should be proud; not a lot of mortals could do that.”
“For what, break my spirits? Doubt my loyalty?”
“I really do just want to talk with you; those things you mentioned will be just mere side effects. Besides,” he paused, taking a bite of the apple, “it won’t be very easy, right? The General of the Inazuman Shogunate had been so thoroughly brainwashed that something like this would not affect her very much, would it?”
“I am not brainwashed; my loyalty to the shogun and the shogunate is sincere. Ever since the end of the vision hunt decree, I have thought about a lot of things, and I am staying loyal to the shogun, and I will follow her as I have always done.”
The balladeer smiled again and threw the apple to Sara; she caught it without thinking with her free hand.
“That’s her genius, or rather, that’s her servant genius. She made you think you made the choice yourself when, in fact, she had perfectly shut down the doors you could have taken.”
“Speak clearly, balladeer.”
“Yae Miko, Guuji Yae, head of the Grand Narukami Shrine, whatever, has been using you; your loyalty to the shogun is a machination of her doing. In fact,” he said, leaning forward on his chair, “she has been manipulating you ever since you were little. Do you really think she has your best interests in mind, general? All she cares about is serving her deity, and you ,” he pointed at her, “are her weapon.”
“I don't mind.”
“She made you pay no mind.”
Her brows furrowed; she was ready to retort again. His comments about the Guuji were getting more and more slanderous. She had to stop him. Deep down, she knew all the things he said made sense, but she couldn’t afford to lose faith in the Guuji. That would be too dangerous. She opened her mouth and—
“Sara.”
Her train of thought had been derailed yet again. It was as if he knew the exact moment to throw her off. How dare he utter her name using that filthy mouth of his? She'd—
“What do you think is the most effective way to be loved by someone?”
She took a step towards him.
“I think the most effective way to be loved by someone is to find their weak spot and gently nestle up against them,” he said slowly to emphasize his point.
“That’s what the sly fox had done to you. She saw you yearning for a place to be, and she gave you that.” He stood up and said, “All she is really doing is digging up the pain from your past and controlling you with it. She gave you an illusion of affection for you to cling to. Takayuki, the Kujou clan, and the Shogun herself. Something you always wanted—a home, a family—but an illusion is just an illusion. Even you know that, don’t you?”
His words pierced her ear and went straight to her heart. She knew that. She always knew that. She doesn’t need him to tell him that. She wanted to shut him up. She must. With her mind increasingly clouded in rage, she took another step towards him subconsciously, gripping the apple with such force that it started to crumble in her hand.
“At least I’m not a cold-blooded murderer like you are, filthy harbinger.” She spoke with a scowl, her gaze hardening.
“You could have fooled me.”
She finally dropped the crushed apple to the ground and looked at him again, her eyes glaring at him. Anger and scorn are the only emotions reflected in her gold eyes.
“As far as I see it, you are a cold-blooded murderer too. You would have killed and butchered the entire world if the shogun had asked you to, would you not? What a selfish person.”
“I’m not selfish! I’m—”
"Oh, but you are, Sara. You didn’t carry out the vision hunt decree because it was justice or the right thing to do; it was because you adore your god. You willingly kill and arrest those who oppose her ideals, even though you know it is wrong. Fathers, mothers, the elderly, and children.”
“I never—!”
“You would have, though. There's not much of a difference. It’s always about you and how you can bring yourself happiness by serving your god. The shogun will pat you on the back, and all will be well for you even if you kill every living being in the world. That’s why you still carry out the order, despite the risk to the lives of innocent people. You’re selfish to the core.”
She wanted to speak against him and prove him wrong. She opened her mouth, but she couldn’t utter a word; her tongue was heavy as if it had turned to lead, and she struggled to swallow the lump in her throat.
He continued, stepping closer to her, now barely a foot away. “You would do anything to make your god, thus yourself, happy, even if it cost lives. You love her, and you’d do anything for her. But let me tell you one thing. It is not necessary to love someone who doesn’t love you back. Your loyalty is merely a desire to have her to yourself. To have her praise for everything you did. But she doesn’t even look at you, Sara. What did she do when you fought Signora? Nothing; she just watched. Yet, you serve her anyway because you think it would make you and her happy even though you’re standing on a tower of corpses.”
She froze, her grip on her bow tightening so much that it began to creak.
“You might think you’re innocent, but you’re a selfish murderer who kills and hurts innocents to make yourself happy. You chose to kill. You don’t actually care about the innocent lives you’ve taken.”
Sara’s breathing grew heavy. That’s not true. That can’t be true. She cared for the people of Inazuma; she wanted to give back to her country; she wanted to see people happy. It was her decision at the time, with all the information she had. She couldn’t have known about Takayuki's betrayal before; he didn’t even care that much about her. What was she supposed to do? She’s trying to atone for her sins, correcting her mistakes, and show her guilt—
As if reading her mind, he scoffed and shook his head lightly. “Your guilt will not purify you. Someone who weeps after they kill is no better than those who don’t.”
Sara was shaken to her core; her fist was shaking with anger or desperation she didn’t know. Seeing that, his lips curled into a small, pitying smile, and he then crooned: “Oh, Sara. What have you done? ”
It was there, and then, when she finally lost it, she tossed her bow aside and rushed towards him, knocking both the table and the chair down, aiming straight for his neck. She knocked him down and sat above his chest, her hands tightly wrapping around his neck. She did not feel any pulse or breathing, but she did not care; that only meant she could break his neck even harder.
He did not struggle under her. “Touched a nerve?” he asked, his voice strangled as he still needed air to speak, and Sara tightened her grip.
“Shut up. Shut up. Shut up,” she repeated to silence him and all the noises in her mind with a shaky voice. Those deaths were her fault. She knew it. She always knew it. She doesn't need anyone to say it to her. Especially not from the likes of him. Her guilt was enough. The corpses from her nightmare were enough. The agonizing feeling in her soul was enough.
“Feel that; remember that. Your ghosts, your corpses, your sin. You—"
She pulled his head up by his neck and slammed it onto the ground below. “Shut up. Just die.” Her voice was filled with anger and desperation. She had to do this—kill him. To protect the shrine, to protect her life, to protect her friends, to believe in the shogun—everything. She had to be strong; she had to kill him. Now. Or else, it would all have been for nothing—the war, the visions she confiscated, the ambitions she trampled, the corpses beneath her feet.
He wrestled with her arm some more, to which she responded with more slamming and more choking. During the struggle, he said, “How does it feel like to kill someone, murderer?”
She responds with a fist to his face. “SHUT UP!” she screamed as she punched him again.
She's not a murderer. She's not selfish. It’s what she believed all her life. She’s a servant; she couldn’t be selfish. Yet his words have a truth to them; she wanted the Shogun to look at her and praise her. She willingly continued the vision hunt decree for her. But all she got was estrangement from her family, the commission, and the people of Inazuma. All the deaths and heartbreaks are for nothing. It was all for nothing. How many people had she wronged to make herself happy? Is she even allowed to be? Selfish. She’s so selfish. But she doesn’t want to accept it. The harsh truths were breaking her to the core. She felt her eyes sting, and a question escaped her without her realizing it, her voice low and strangled. “Why? Why are you doing this to me?”
She saw her own tears drop on his face, near those indigo-colored eyes. She felt a hand cupping her left cheek with a softness that she would never expect from someone like him.
“Because I want to see what you will become. All I’m interested in is giving you a bit of knowledge and cheering you on in my own special way.”
“Why?”
“Because,” he said, wiping her tears, “we’re similar.”
Before she could ask or answer, she felt air leaving her stomach as Scaramouche punched her in the upper abdomen and sent her flying to the other side of the room. She hit the ground with a thump. He has been toying with her, that’s for sure. There is no way she could choke a harbinger to death like that; he had let her, and she fell right into his trap. She tried to stand up while he walked towards her, coughing and gasping for air all the while. He took out what seemed to be a chess piece, glowing bright purple, from his pocket. What is that?
“I will give you some more knowledge as a parting gift, general. First, what I have on my hand is a gnosis; this is the power of an archon and their connection to Celestia that Guuji gave to me in exchange for the traveler's life and your sob story.” He showed it to her by holding it up. “Second, archons do not choose who will receive a vision.” He walked closer to her, and she backed herself into the wall. “And last, the one who you’re serving is not the real Raiden Shogun, but a mere puppet; the real Shogun, general, is Raiden Ei.”
“I don’t believe you.”
"Of course not; just look at you." He smiled, all the softness gone. All that is left is toxic waste. “But this time, please do think about it; otherwise, people will be hurt because of your pathetic blind loyalty again.”
She coughed. “Why even bother telling me when you’re convinced that I won’t believe you?”
He sighed and smiled that terrible smile. “Because you are useful, general. All you need is a little direction.” He walked until he was right in front of her, then crouched to see her at eye level. She looked at him with contempt. “Like a puppet who's just been cut from its strings. The question would be: What would you do with this information I gave you? Would you try to find out the truth or live your life in blissful ignorance? Which one would it be?”
She spat on his face.
He laughed and wiped it off while standing up again, walking away from her. “Whatever you do, general, just remember that blissful ignorance has cost you before, and it was not cheap. Are you going to repeat the same mistake? Stacking up that tower of corpses you have?” He turned to her. “Or are you going to take matters into your own hands now?”
She swallowed while trying to stand up again, leaning on the wall for support.
“But then again, questioning the whole reason for your life—why you fight—might be too much for that bird brain of yours. I mean, what would you do if you found out that that reason was false all along?” He stood over the crushed apple and stepped on it, crushing it completely. He turned his back on her again. He seems to be playing with the gnosis he mentioned earlier. “I would rather disappear, if I’m being honest, but hey, you are not me, are you?”
She walked slowly towards him with a limp, and the spot where he had punched her still hurt. The probability of it developing into a nasty bruise is unavoidable; one of her ribs might even be broken. The balladeer is still here; she has a chance to kill him by herself now, even if it's unlikely. What should she do? She stole a glance at the bow she threw earlier. It’s too far; she won’t make it without him noticing. Maybe her vision? Summon a Titanbreaker? No, she is still too weak for that, but she might be able to summon her tengu storm call to grab her bow. Still a bit too far, though; she needs to keep him occupied while walking towards it.
“Didn’t you say we’re similar?”
“I did,” he said while twirling the gnosis in his hand. “You remind me of someone I knew.”
She took careful steps. "Yourself, I imagine.”
“Quite right; you were listening after all.”
Her mind thinks things over; if he thinks he’s like her, then isn’t he projecting? Subconsciously, at the very least. She would try probing him to distract him. In that way, maybe she could even turn it against him.
“Were you abandoned too? By your parents?”
She saw him pause for just a fraction of a second, and she now knew that she was on the right track.
“Getting inquisitive, general?”
“The thought of someone going through the exact thing I did is,” she pursed her lips, thinking of another word other than ‘comforting.’ “Interesting,” she chose at the end. Strange, she usually stumbles her way out of situations like this; she was getting too vulnerable for the act, but it was necessary.
He did not answer.
She’s getting somewhere; all she needs is to probe a little deeper and keep the conversation going while she keeps walking slowly towards her bow.
“You piqued my interest; you should be proud; not a lot of mortals could do that.”
He referred to her as a mortal; adding to that, the information her men gave her told her that he doesn’t eat or drink. When she choked him earlier, she didn’t feel breathing or a pulse. He was clearly not human; he could be immortal. What else? He is knowledgeable about the Archons and how they work, maybe because he’s a harbinger, or is it something else?
“His existence does not change the fact that you were still abandoned in that forest when you were a child.”
“Do you hate your parents too? For abandoning you?” She probes with a loaded question. If his ego is enough for him to start projecting himself onto her, this should work.
He took a deep breath and sighed. She could feel him weighing his options; perhaps being so similar helped her disarm him better. Hopefully, at least.
“I think you should start to be careful with your questions, general.” He said.
That’s her confirmation.
“Apologies, it's just that I thought I could—nevermind,” she said with as much sympathy as possible. She had gotten closer to her bow—just a few more steps.
He hates his parents, but he is also immortal. Who are his parents? What is she missing?
"He... looks like the Shogun?”
Right, she remembered one of her men saying that to her, and it was true; he really resembles the Shogun. But do archons even…? She was not sure. What's more is that he doesn’t eat or breathe like normal humans do. What is he?
“Someone might think you are just a puppet for the shogun…”
“...like a good puppet you are.”
“Like a puppet who's just been cut from its strings.”
“…a mere puppet; the real Shogun, General, is Raiden Ei.”
Puppet. He used that word a lot. Perhaps he is one. If that’s even a thing, was his mother, or maybe, because he’s not a human, his creator, Raiden Ei?
He turned around to face her, and he saw her limping towards her bow. Her eyes widened in surprise as she immediately stopped walking. Shit! She’s just one step away! Out of panic, she opened her mouth and—
“You are Raiden Ei’s puppet.”
That was enough to completely stun him, and in that moment, she took a large step, and just milliseconds later, she summoned her tengu storm call to get to her bow in a flash of purple lightning. She bent to get her bow while taking hurried steps, grabbing it, and twisting her body to face him. With all her practice, she quickly materialized an arrow charged with electro, aiming straight for his head. She pulled the string despite the intense pain in her abdomen and ribs. The arrow was let loose; he dodged it just in time, and the arrow whizzed past his head and cut a small portion of his hair. After she cursed to herself, she took the proper standing position and aimed again while he rushed towards her. Too close to shoot! She took a step back and tried to whack him with her bow to her right. He ducked, leaning backward in the direction of the swing, and with his momentum, swung his left fist towards her upper abdomen, the same spot where he had hit her before. Sara was knocked back again, landing on her butt, and felt intense pain in the area where he had just hit her. If it was not broken before, it is now. Before she could call out for her men, his fingers found her throat, and he was the one choking her moments later. He lifted her by the neck, but because she was taller than him, she was on her knees. He forced her to look up at him.
He laughed. “Well done, general. You’re cleverer than I thought. Yes, yes, I am. And let me tell you one thing, she is a bad mother. Just like Takayuki is a bad ‘father’ to you.” He exhaled. “Ah, how disgustingly similar we are.”
She tried to yank his arms away, pulling on them and punching them with her hands, but his grip only tightened. She gasps multiple times, trying to get air.
“It really is amusing to see someone as pathetic as you struggling like this.”
Through her pain and her out-of-breath lungs, she said, “You’re the pathetic one. How does it feel—?” He tightened his grip, and she winced and groaned, but she continued even though her lungs screamed for air and tears started falling from her face, her lips turning upward into a mocking smile not too different from his toxic one.
"How does it feel to be unable to call your mother, mother?"
His darkened and enraged glare was the last thing she saw before losing consciousness.