Chapter Text
The soft lighting of the restaurant made for a romantic atmosphere, but it caused the area to be dim. Keeping an eye on the man who sat across the room was made more difficult, but not impossible. Not when you're trained for it.
Even to the trained eye, I knew that I blended in like any other civilian. It was a talent, to be a chameleon in any situation, and it was one that I possessed. The rage I felt inside for the middle aged man who sat at a table with an innocent woman was untameable, but I didn't let it show. I kept my true feelings pushed far down as I wore a mask of casual disinterest.
It should infuriate me that he doesn't know my face. He doesn't know who I am when he took the most important person in my life away from me. But it's to my advantage that he doesn't, because it means I can catch him. Images of her flashes through my mind, and I picked up my glass to take a quick sip of the alcohol, trying to push the thoughts back. It won't help me to get caught up in her memory.
Josephine Gray had been like a sister to me. We met in kindergarten, we trained at the academy together, and I had to watch her die. And it's all his fault. Jackson Quinn. Vigilante UnSub who likes to think of himself as the punisher who hunts down women who he believed to have done something wrong. There really was no reason for him to have killed Jo. She was innocent and good. But he was misogynistic, and many women fit into his idea of currported and evil.
Across the restaurant, the waiter brought him his bill, his unsuspecting date smiling when he offered to pay it in full. I won't let him take another girl, ever again. I watched carefully, waiting for the moment when he would get up and lead her outside to his car. I had a small window of opportunity to stop him before he had her in his car and he was off. After that, it could be too late. So I can't let it get that far.
They stood up from the table, the girl sliding her coat over the top of her dress before linking her arm with his. I watched them head for the door, waited a second, and casually stood up from my table. I really wish the man hadn't picked such a fancy location, because I seriously didn't want to take him down in six inch strappy high heels. But I guess I'll have to channel my inner catwoman.
I strolled across the room towards the door, sending a small smile to the waiter who stood by the exit. The cold night air hit me the moment I pulled open the door. The sound of the waves from the ocean sent a calming feeling through me, but it wasn't enough to calm the raging storm within as I set my sights on my target.
I slowed my pace slightly, not wanting to alert him to my presence. But the moment that the girl opened the car door, I knew I had to make my move.
"Solace, it's now or never." The voice of my team's unit chief, Mathew Bernard, spoke in my comms. They had been with me every step of the way, and were only parked a few feet away from me in an unmarked van.
I slipped my gun out of my purse, aiming it over at the man who was about to climb into the rental car. "Jackson Quinn. Put your hands where I can see them."
The girl gasped, taking a few steps back at the sight of my gun. Jackson looked like a startled animal, his head shot up and his eyes went wide.
I could have screamed as he spun on his heels and took off down the path towards the beach. I sighed heavily, kicking off my high heels and leaving them in my wake as I took off after him.
I raced down the concrete path, ignoring any stone that dug into the sole of my feet, no matter how much I wanted to wince. I would have thought it would be better once I made it down onto the sand, but the shells were there waiting for me to step on.
My heart pounded painfully in my chest as my bare feet hit against the sandy ground with a continuous rhythm. My lungs were burning as I desperately gasped for air.
The only sound I could hear over my heavy breaths and aggressive heart beats was the ocean waves lapping at the sandy shore to my left. I probably would have drowned it out if it weren't for the oncoming storm. The gray clouds weren't there when I had entered the restaurant, but it mirrored my own mind at this moment.
Jackson was a few feet ahead of me. He glanced over his shoulder at me, almost tripping himself up in the process. I couldn't help but wish that he would. It would make my job a little easier if he would fall face first into the sand.
My foot stumbled slightly as I stepped on a particularly loose section of sand. But I made a quick recovery. Running on the beach was unsurprisingly difficult, it would be easier if he would just run closer to the low tide, at least the sand was wet and solidified over there.
I felt myself falter, my lungs burning painfully and my ankle was aching from rolling painfully in the sand. But a memory of Jo flashed through my mind, causing me to push it aside and run even faster.
Jackson turned his head once again, the whites of his eyes shined like spotlights in the dark. While he was looking fearfully back at me, he wasn't watching his footing. I couldn't deny the relief that washed through me as he caught his foot on a piece of long seaweed and tumbled forward onto the ground.
I ran the remaining few feet and skidded to a halt just behind the man who was sprawled out on the beach. I collapsed onto my knees and immediately grabbed both of his arms, twisting them around his back to keep him from getting up again. The man grunted loudly and cursed loudly at me, but I couldn't get any words out yet, my lungs were still burning.
I pulled the handcuffs out of my bag that I had miraculously kept a hold of and locked them around his wrists. After a few moments of catching my breath, I finally managed to speak to the man who was now in the custody of the FBI.
"Jackson Quinn, you are under arrest. Anything you say can and will be used against you in the court of law." I stated firmly as the rest of my team finally managed to catch up to us.
I sat back as my unit chief took over from me, letting out a big sigh as I was still trying to catch my breath again. I should feel relieved. He's finally been caught, there will finally be justice for Jo. But it won't bring her back. It's true what they say, revenge leaves you empty. My face fell and my eyes burned as I watched the chief heave him up onto his feet.
"Think you should hit the gym, Nat." My friend and colleague, Bobby said with a light laugh. I could tell she was trying to lighten the mood. She often did so with humor.
"Funny." I deadpanned with a roll of my eyes, a light smile tugging at my lips that didn't quite meet my eyes. Bobby stepped up beside me and lent her hand down towards me. I smiled up at her weakly and took a hold of her outstretched hand, allowing her to help me up on my feet.
It's over. And now I don't know what to do with myself. I have been so focused on catching him since Jo's death merely one month ago. But now that I have caught the guy, and he'll be going away for a long time, I don't know what to do with myself.
I haven't even stopped to fully process what happened, no matter how many times the state mandated therapist told me to. Now that I don't have her by my side, I don't know where I fit into this world.
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Three weeks later, he was sentenced. Jackson Quinn got life in prison. Which is the least that he deserves. As much as I had hoped that seeing him behind bars would make me feel better. It hadn't. Everything about Interpol was now haunted by her memory and tainted by that man. The plane, the office, even my own apartment held painful memories. So I ran.
I packed my bags and left. I know that my team understands, but I also know that my sudden departure hurt them deeply. They were also dealing with the loss of a friend, and now they had to deal with my absence as well. The thought sometimes kept me up, but not as much as the memory of her.
My new apartment was on the top floor, overlooking a grassy park in Washington state. It felt nice to be in an area that was untouched by memories and pain. A clean slate. Tabula rasa.
A wet nose shoved against my bare thigh, making me jolt at the sensation. I looked down into the deep brown innocent eyes of my new companion and smiled gently. It was hard not to when the golden retriever was holding a cuddly carrot in his mouth, his tail wagging wildly as be snorted.
I reached down and ruffled her fur fondly. On the first day in my new apartment with nothing to keep my company aside from daytime tv, I immediately felt loneliness come knocking. And that is how Kenobi came into my life. He was only one, only just starting to grow into his long limbs.
Along with all my other changes that I impulsively made, I got a new job. One that I have been dreaming about since I was in high school. The FBI's Behavioural Analysis Unit. There had been an opening in the team for a new agent, and I had jumped at the opportunity, hardly giving myself time to think about it as I put myself forward.
After an intense interview process with SSA Aaron Hotchner, the BAU's unit chief, I was accepted into the team. The moment I had gotten the call, all I wanted to do was tell Jo. My excitement had fallen significantly when I realized that I couldn't.
First days are always incredibly nerve wracking. But when it's for the job you had only dreamed about as a teenager in your childhood bedroom, it was even more terrifying.
I spent about an hour picking out what to wear, leaving me with thirty minutes to get down to the headquarters. Kenobi made it hard to leave my apartment, with his wide puppy eyed stare, but I managed. And before I knew it, I was standing outside of the glass doors that led into the offices of the BAU.
I took in a deep breath, trying to shake off the wave of nerves that threatened to drown me, before I pushed open the door and stepped inside. I had been given a desk last time I was here, and so I placed my bag down on the wooden table, glancing around for who I might be working with. There was a group of people standing by a desk, and I caught the tale end of their conversation.
"I mean, clearly she's a badass. And she's capable of doing the job. But, do you know if she's nice? She has to be nice. I mean, what if she's actually horrible and we don't get along." A blonde woman who was dressed eccentrically exclaimed worriedly.
She was speaking with two other people. The older woman she was talking with locked her eyes onto me over the blonde's shoulder, giving a pointed look to the blonde.
"Oh, god. I've done it again, haven't I?" The blonde muttered nervously before she turned to face me with an awkward expression.
"Hi." I said with a small smile, trying to ease the discomfort that was radiating off of the woman.
"You must be Dr Solace. I'm Alex Blake, it's nice to meet you." The brunette said with a smile, holding her hand out for me.
I reached out and briefly shook her hand with a smile. "It's nice to meet you, too, but please, just call me Natasha."
"Got it." Alex nodded with a smile as she sat back down on her chair.
"I-I'm Penelope Garcia. I'm sorry about..." Penelope trailed off awkwardly
"Don't be. I understand your skepticism. But I like to think that I'm nice." I said with a smile. My gaze drifted to the third person.
The man was perched on the desk with a stopwatch around his neck and a newspaper on the desk beside him with the crossword open. I would be lying if I didn't say he was attractive with his high cheekbones and deep brown eyes. But I pushed the thought away, knowing that he's one of my new coworkers.
"Hi, I'm Dr Spencer Reid." The man raised his hand in a wave, a slightly awkward smile on his face that was nonetheless welcoming, to which I smiled in response.
"Hi." I replied softly.
Penelope's phone buzzed. She looked down and quickly excused herself, rushing off towards the stairs that led up to the catwalk.
"So, Dr Reid. What's the stop watch for?" I asked curiously.
"Oh, I was going to help Blake time how fast she can do the crossword." Spencer said, picking up the newspaper that sat beside him on the desk.
"Okay, well, I'm ready when you are." Alex said, leaning forward In her chair. Spencer started the stop watch, and she was off. She flew through the crossword, spelling words that I didn't even know the meaning to.
"Six letters. Between the waves." Spencer said
"Slatch." Alex stated
"Yes. Ten letters. Wandering alone." Spencer said
"Uh, if it's Latin in origin, alone is solus, vagare is wandering, ten letters...S-O-L-I-V-A-G-A-N-T." Alex answered
"Congratulations, Blake, you just finished that crossword puzzle in seven minutes." Spencer said as he clicked the stopwatch off.
"I mean, you could do it, too." Alex stated, looking subtly proud of herself.
"I've done it in five and a half, actually. There's a theory about pattern recognition where you don't even have to look at the clues anymore but I found going across instead of down helps because the sequence of saccades and fixations in traditional reading assist with other oculomotor tasks such as solving crossword puzzles." Spencer explained
"Huh." Blake nodded in interest
"Happy Wednesday, my nerds." I looked up to see an older man with a goatee step up to the group.
"Hey, you're here early." Alex greeted him
"Apparently not early enough. I missed all the excitement." The man said sarcastically. "You do that in pen?" He asked
"Is there any other way?" Alex asked
"Oh, hey. You must be Natasha Solace. Good to have you on the team, I'm David Rossi." The man said, holding his hand out.
I shook his hand briefly with a smile. "Yeah." I nodded
"Where's Hotch?" Rossi then asked
"In there with Garcia." Alex mused, nodding up at the room where the two were standing.
"Everything okay?" Alex then asked
"We'll see." Rossi stated before walking off to his own desk.
"Ten letters, starts with C." Alex said
"Cabalistic?" Spencer answered
"Indeed." Alex nodded
"Oi, let's do this." Penelope called from the door into the room she and Hotch had been in.
I headed up the steps and across the catwalk into the room. There was two people sat around the table who I hadn't met yet. A blonde woman and a bald, muscular man. The woman turned her head and her eyes lit up in realisation.
"Hi, I'm Jennifer Jeraeu, but you can just call me JJ. You must be Natasha." JJ smiled kindly, offering her hand to me.
"Nice to meet you." I sent her a small smile and shook her hand.
"Hi, Derek Morgan. Welcome to the team." The muscular man turned and shook my head, sending me a friendly but boyish grin.
I returned the smile and took a seat in between Spencer and Alex just as Hotch walked into the room. "An hour ago, the man on your tablets was found wandering the streets of Baltimore before he collapsed." Hotch began to say. Garcia quickly appeared behind me and handed me an IPad in a black case. I smiled and thanked her quietly before opening the case and looking at the file that was already loaded.
"He is unconscious, has no ID on him, so we don't know his name. He's got ligature marks on his wrists, and it's impossible to tell how long he's been missing." Garcia said. The man in the pictures looked awful.
"Are those puncture wounds in the corner of his eyes?" Rossi asked
"Yes, and an MRI confirmed that fibers in his brain had been severed." Hotch said
"He had a lobotomy?" Rosie questioned
"There was hemorrhaging and foreign object splinters embedded behind his right eye." Hotch said
"Most likely from whatever tool the UnSub used." Spencer Reid said
"My guess would be an ice pick." Rossi said
"Guys still alive. Can we talk to him?" Derek asked
"You should try." Hotch said
"Someone with such a specific M.O. has probably done this before." Alex said
"We just don't know about it yet. It's all being run through ViCAP." Hotch said
"Yes, it is." Garcia confirmed
"The entry points in his eyes are from an outpatient-style traditional lobotomy." JJ said
"Less mess than drilling holes like Dahmer did. And Dahmer's method killed. This didn't." Morgan said
"So either the UnSub is lucky or has medical training." I spoke up
"He wanted his victim to survive." Morgan added
"We need to canvas the area where he was found. He couldn't have walked far in this condition." Hotch said
"Lobotomies are considered the surgery of the soul. Doctors like Walter Freeman claimed they could cure a number of mental illnesses. He believed the procedure could relieve suffering." Spencer stated in a factual way.
"Excuse me, Agent Hotchner." A man suddenly appeared at the door.
"Yes." Hotch asked as he turned around to greet him
"Agent Cruz is here." The agent replied. A man then walked in behind the other agent, who I assume was Agent Cruz.
"Everyone, this is our new section chief. This is agent Mateo Cruz. These are agents Blake..." Hotch was suddenly cut off by Cruz.
"Blake, Dr Reid, Morgan, Jareau, Rossi and Solace." Cruz stated as he pointed to all of us. I was honestly surprised that he knew who I was considering I've only just joined the team, he must have done his research.
"Good to officially meet up oh. And Penelope Garcia. Erin Strauss always spoke very highly of you." Cruz said
"Oh. Thank you." Garcia said with a confused tone.
"I spoke to the Baltimore office. Seems they are at a loss." Cruz said
"When the identity of the victim is unknown, it makes everything that much harder." Hotch said
Cruz nodded in response "I'd like to join you. It's not every day these cases take you an hour away from home, so..."
"We leave in 20 minutes." Hotch said. Everyone began to pick up their files, I closed over the case of the IPad and stood up, following after the others.