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Moiraine walked through Anaiya’s garden in the shadow of the massive city of Chachin. There were flowers everywhere, but she had also spotted a few herbs as well as other healing plants.
“Back on your feet?” The other Aes Sedai’s voice sounded behind her, just before Anaiya caught up with her. From the back of the house, the clanging of swords could be heard. Setagana had asked Lan to be his sparring partner.
Moiraine looked around herself. “You made a nice place for yourself. So far from Tar Valon.” Anaiya had once been the Blue’s First Selector.
Anaiya smiled. “I needed a different view for a while.” She glanced at Moirane. “Just like you, I assume. You were the talk for weeks after you ran away.”
Moiraine had known this conversation would be coming. “Life at the Tower was not for me.” She paused. “I don’t wish to go back.”
Of course, the other Blue had picked up on her subtlety. “This incident can stay between us,” she replied. “But I am interested to hear how you caught the attention of three Eyeless.”
“Bad luck,” Moiraine simply said. She liked Anaiya, even trusted her, but she couldn’t risk saying too much.
Anaiya was silent for a moment. “You were in bad shape when your warder brought you here. One more hour and I couldn’t have saved you. You should be more careful on your adventures.”
Moiraine sighed. “I will be.” Only trouble always seemed to find her. She hadn’t exactly meant to get stabbed.
Anaiya was inspecting some of her flowers. There was more she had to say. “You have a good warder by your side,” she said, touching the petals of a dried flower. Under her fingers, it began to bloom once more.
“I know,” Moiraine replied, not sure where this conversation was headed now.
“Is there more to it?” Anaiya asked, drawing weaves of water to water her plants. The sound of droplets hitting the ground was oddly soothing.
Moiraine had meant to say no, but the word wouldn’t leave her lips. Would she ever get used to these oaths? “Maybe,” she said instead. This one worked.
Anaiya gave her a long look. “I saw the way he looked at you. It’s no uncommon thing between Aes Sedai and warders.” She smiled. “One gets lonely from time to time.”
Moiraine had suspected when she saw Anaiya and her warder, but not asked. “Don’t you get worried?” she asked quietly. “That it’s only there because of the bond?”
Anaiya tilted her head as if contemplating that thought. “There is nothing more intimate than what we share with those we bond. What could be more meaningful than loving someone while knowing every corner of their mind?”
Moiraine had no answer. Maybe because Anaiya was right. Behind the house, the sound of swordplaying had stopped.
“Maybe you should ask your warder yourself,” Anaiya said into the silence, turning to leave before Moirane had the chance to say anything else.
She was right. Moiraine had avoided this conversation for so long because she was scared of the outcome, but it wasn’t fair to Lan. It was time for honesty. Although she would have preferred to have this conversation literally anywhere but in Anaiya’s house. Maybe they could leave in the evening.
She walked through the garden to the back of the house, looking for Lan. He was still talking to Setagana, but approached her once he spotted Moiraine. The other warder gave Moiraine an amused look, then disappeared inside the house.
“Did you win?” Moiraine wanted to know, not sure where to look now that they were alone. She didn’t want Lan to know what she had been thinking about, but he could probably tell anyway. He always could.
“I usually win,” Lan replied, with a hint of a smile on his lips. “Anaiya wants us to stay another night,” he added because of course he had read Moiraine’s thoughts. “Setagana just told me.”
She hadn’t mentioned that to Moiraine, clearly intentionally. “Did he ask what we were doing in the middle of nowhere chased by three Fades?”
Lan huffed. “No. Did Anaiya ask?”
“No,” Moiraine replied, and that worried her. Had the other Blue already figured out what she had been doing? Anaiya was too smart.
“I doubt she is Black Ajah,” Lan said into the silence.
It was meant to be comforting, but it only made Moiraine feel more guilty. Anaiya had been her friend once, and she had saved her life yesterday. But they were lying to her. “We leave first thing tomorrow morning,” she replied, trying to ignore her guilty conscience. It was for the greater good.
oOo
They spent the evening with Anaiya and Setagana, sharing stories about their shared time at the White Tower. Moiraine carefully avoided all talk regarding Siuan, even if Anaiya seemed to be awfully interested in their relationship. Moiraine was relieved when they finally went upstairs into the guest room and escaped from the questions.
Moiraine slipped into bed right away, listening to the rustling of fabric in the darkness while Lan undressed. She looked up at the ceiling, trying to prepare herself for the talk she wanted to have. This was hardly the right place or time, but if she waited any longer she might lose her nerve again.
Lan laid down next to her, not immediately taking her into his arms like he usually would. He knew she had something to say first. But where would she even start? How could she explain the chaos in her head?
“I already know,” Lan said into the silence.
Moiraine turned her head to look at him. In the dim light, she couldn’t see his expression. She suddenly had a vague memory of herself in Lan’s arms on horseback, and of him saying he would marry her any day. “You know what Min told me.”
He huffed. “Only what you told me, which wasn’t much. The rest of that secret you can keep.” He rolled over, watching her. “Can we stop pretending now?”
Moiraine didn’t feel very confident anymore. She still hadn’t found the right words. “I was scared it was only because of the bond,” she whispered, so quiet she feared Lan might not have understood.
Lan slipped closer, resting his arm on her pillow. “The bond did not make me fall in love. That was all you.”
Moiraine stilled, looking up at him. She hadn’t been prepared for those words. Not even when she planned this conversation in her head. Some part of her had still been in doubt. She felt the familiar urge to run.
Like he had read her mind, Lan wrapped his arm around her waist, trapping her against his body. “You’re not running anywhere, Aes Sedai,” he said quietly, leaving a kiss against her hair. “And I know how you feel. You don’t need to say anything.”
Moiraine opened her mouth to protest but remembered the oaths she had taken. There was a certain peace she felt all of a sudden. Like a weight had been lifted off her shoulders. She hadn’t actually done any talking, but she knew she didn’t have to anymore. “I assume you want to get married in the Borderlands,” she said into the silence.
Lan froze for a second, taken off guard by the words. “That was the least romantic proposal I have ever heard,” he said after he had recovered his voice.
Moiraine smiled. “Why, were you going to ask me the next time we had a near-death experience?”
Lan huffed. “I didn’t know you were so eager to get married.”
Maybe she was just eager to make sure that this wasn’t all some sort of dream. Moiraine hadn’t quite made up her mind about everything yet. Min’s prophecy had managed to ruin her game of ignorance.
“I had you all figured out anyway,” Lan muttered into her ear. He left a light kiss against her lips. “I’ll marry you in the Borderlands, or anywhere else.”
Moiraine wasn’t sure about wedding traditions in the Borderlands, but she would figure them out. Maybe something that didn’t draw the attention of the entire country. If that was even possible. She wrapped her arms around Lan’s neck. “If Siuan hears about this, she’s never going to let me hear the end of it.”
Lan chuckled, kissing her again. “I’ll make sure she’s invited.” He only laughed more when Moiraine slapped his shoulder.