Work Text:
“So now you want me out of your sight, is that it?” It was hectic in their apartment, conversations like these usually happen for a multitude of reasons but this time it's too much… Seele had been requesting Veliona all sorts of things once she’d been made aware that Veliona can pretty much do anything now. To Veliona, this was insanely offensive! How could she do such a thing to her!
Seele sighs, “I… I didn't say that… I just wanted you to consider it. Is all…” Seele has been dealing with this same problem for the past few weeks, with nobody but Veliona bringing it up any chance she got. Honestly, what really is the problem here, she was just suggesting—
Though, sometimes Veliona would genuinely feel bad about making jokes like these in environments like this. She figures Seele would've gotten used to it by now. “It's— it's not that! I was joking and besides, do I really have to?!”
Seele looks at her with a deadpan, well — yes. Veliona sits at home staring at a wall all day, or follows her around like a parent hearing news of a local van kidnapper, so maybe it’d be nice if Veliona could find something that she wanted to do. Seele wants the best for her, she just wishes that Veliona would give this a shot but instead they’re in another arguably one-sided argument…
Seele finally says, “Listen, I’m not forcing you… it’s your decision.”
She gives Veliona a hug before leaving the house, and there, Veliona’s left to stare at a wall again. Honestly, it shouldn't be that serious — even she knows that but the very fact Seele isn't telling her to do it, or forcing her, or convincing her to do it makes her want to tear apart the walls of their apartment and rebuild it from scratch; it makes her want to retch and scream from the top of her lungs.
She mulls over it, for hours, at the same spot. Until day becomes night — until Seele gets home to an unmoving apartment, having to drag Veliona to eat dinner. Yet it's so peaceful, and so… welcoming. Eating dinner is always so refreshing, because Seele gets to laugh at her miserable face, and as agitated as she is — she can't stay like that for long.
“I thought about it.” Veliona says, chewing rice slowly as Seele looks up.
Seele laughs, “You dont say…”
Veliona scoffs at the humorous remark, having to drink water so as to not choke. She places a hand on her temple, and starts mulling it over once again. Until Seele had to snap her out of it.
“You aren't done yet.” She says, matter of factly. She looks at the girl in front of her, smiling when she speaks. “It’s really okay, I promise. Take your time.”
“No, it's not — I'll go insane.” Veliona retorts, keeping her eyes closed for the moment, thinking about it so thoroughly to the point Seele might be able to hear the gears in her brain turning. She opens her mouth, closes it, then opens it again.
Seele only looks at her half-expectantly, deciding that Veliona was still, probably not done thinking. She stands up, handing Veliona a glass of water, and sitting back down again.
“I… kind of dont want to.” She says, after a long period of silence.
“That's okay.” Seele replies.
Veliona genuinely thought that that would be the end of it. All her worries would be put to ease and all the doubts in her mind will be able to finally sleep. She was pleased, they talked about it for a while — almost pointless, yes, but it took her mind off of things that she’d rather not think about.
—
Veliona finds herself stumbling towards the kitchen in a deep haze not one day later. It was early in the morning and she was parched, out of her mind and had a fever going haywire. This should be normal, her body temperature hasn't been normal since she got a body and staring at a wall all day can't be good for one's health — so she tries to excuse the ringing in her ear due to tiredness and the silence. She grabs whatever she could from the refrigerator. Downing Sprite from some random food chain, its carbonation was almost gone and it tasted spiritless. Though, water would have had the same effect.
She stumbles onto the couch, cold and out of her mind. She recalls the conversation during dinner a day ago. How Seele had been so understanding even if she outright refused the offer.
Why was she letting this get to her, again? She doesn't know, and right now all she wants is to sleep but she can't. Her mind is racing and she finds herself replaying the same conversation again and again in her head.
It’s exhausting and she can't make it stop, no matter what she does. Seele hasn't seemed to notice yet, which was for the better. She’d rather avoid having to talk to her about the same topic again, and if replaying a conversation gets exhausting, what more when she's trying to hold one?
She tries to sleep about an hour or so later, finally feeling exhausted enough to slip into bed and close her eyes. She felt as if it was finally working, but then she feels a grumble. She slowly sits up, trying to figure out where it was coming from — only to find out she was already clutching the perpetrator. Her stomach was restless, probably because of drinking a carbonated drink on an empty stomach.
She slowly slips back into bed, feeling defeated, feeling every single twitch and churn of her stomach — hearing everything in the room. She swears she’s going insane, she swears she feels the hair on the back of her neck stand up with every noise her stomach makes, and she can do nothing but hope she falls asleep.
Though, true to her nature, she doesn't, sleeping is still somewhat of a foreign concept to her — but she’d want nothing more than to just be knocked out. She doesn't want to think, doesn't want to hear, because all that plays in her mind aside from white noise and red ringing is Seele’s voice. Distorted, grumbled, and deep; almost.
Moreover, she's fully aware that her eyes have started playing tricks on her. They have been showing her flashes of light, blue and white in color — faint, then utterly blinding, then faint again.
They only do this in complete darkness, so she turns on a light — but she knows she could never sleep with the lights on, so she hopes the orbs of light stop following the movement of her eyes if the lights are on for long enough.
It takes a little while, she's no longer conscious of the time, but she turns the lights off again. There she feels like it's working, and she hopes it is.
—
When she woke, or rather, once she had opened her eyes; she saw an arm over her eye. The sensation of a hand on her head, spots of blue and white that she knew to be Seele. However, there was something… wrong. Her voice was robotic, almost like a broken record. Repeating the same words over, and over, and over again. She can't hear anything but this, this and the ticking of a clock. A clock that doesn't seem to be in sight.
She tries to ignore this constant nagging, not sure if it's just her mind playing tricks on her or if Seele is actually there and she is just incoherent to her. Regardless, it’s no use, if she lets this get to her it could lead to more, and if she ignores it then maybe it could lead to more as well. She was playing a losing game, her gut knows that.
After a while, she thought this would cease, she would finally get some sleep; things would return to normal. It’s just that, whenever she opens her eyes, the figure in front of her becomes all the more distorted. All the more… terrifying, all the more mind haunting.
She tries to cover her face with a pillow, which eventually gets removed. She’s definitely playing a losing game, every fiber of her being is aware now.
—
She doesn't know how much time has passed, but once she finally decides to move she realizes that the door to her room has been locked this entire time. Hopefully Seele didn't notice—
Oh, Seele’s there.
Wait, no she isn't..
Who…is this?
A distorted image of Seele waves at her, with an utterly unnerving grin on her face.
“So you finally decided to come out of hiding.” The figure says, almost a violent sneer. “Why do you look as if you were working non-stop these past few days?”
“Didn't you already come to a decision?”
Veliona curses under her breath, she knows this isn't real, she's sure, and yet—
“Leave me alone.” She says, after minute after minute of silence.
“You shouldn't be here.” She says, she says as if she's sure. She says as if doubt doesn't riddle every nerve in her body. She says as if it's true.
“Oh but I should!” The figure says, intent so malicious her fingers tremble, and her head spins. She shouldn't be treated this way. She’s going to teach this horrid creature a lesson.
She swings, at first hitting nothing — her hazy mind registering the fact that her knuckles have hit a wall late. She swings again, this time nearing the counter, near glass.
“You can't catch me.” The figure taunts, disappearing from her sight and turning into a coloured orb. She dances around Veliona’s vision. Appearing, reappearing, and disappearing all again. It was insufferable.
The pain jolts her awake. She was never asleep to begin with. Clutching her right hand as waves of thick pain and throbbing coarse through her hand. She looks at the counter, her eyes finally seeing color as it should be.
She sighs, trying to find something, anything she can cling to, anything she can transfer the pain to; but she's on her own now. Nobody was there to see her in this state. She doesn't even know if this was actually happening.
She sees paper, her first instinct was to take it to tend to her wound — but she notices familiar handwriting that she just can't miss.
“Hey, are you okay…?” The note reads, “Please unlock your door, it's been days.”
Days? Her mind spins, trying to think how to make up for the time she's lost with excuses that can be easily made up. She thinks, and thinks — while her hand bleeds on the table, staining her sweatshirt.
She tries to look around for a phone, something, someone to call. She figured her phone would be drained, and she figured Seele wouldn't have left anything. She was convinced that she would be left to rot in this room; whether nightmare or not.
This all happens within a few swift minutes, before she hears a beep. She sees a shadow at first, fearing that this may be the end of her — but it was actually…
“Seele…”
—
This… is better. So much better than having to hallucinate nightmare fuel, the work is mundane, it's not too much — it's not too little either.
However, certain types of people get on her nerves, making her rethink that maybe hallucination and no sleep are better. One of Seele’s friends… might just be the epitome of this feeling.
“Okay. What else?” She says, through the drive through station, waiting for the person on the other end to reply. Admittedly, the fact that she went insane over getting a job at MCDONALDS, is something you could NEVER waterboard out of her.
“Yuhh skrr, can I—” Fuck. “get a bhocolate bhip bookie, yuh, and a boke—” Shut. The. Fuck. Up. “yeah, yeah a large boke, and six piece BICKEN nuggets—”
… That was when Veliona decided she had enough.
“Pull up.” She says.
“What? Im NAWT done ordering yet bookie…”
“I SAID, PULL THE FUCK UP, KIANA.”