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Things at school had gotten very hectic in the past couple of weeks, as the homecoming dance was inching closer and closer. This week it seemed like Darcy couldn’t go a full day without some mention of dresses and suits, who was going with who, or bearing witness to some elaborate homecoming proposal. She was in the spirit, too, as this would be her first ever school dance, and she already had some ideas of what she’d like to wear. The last time she’d ever done anything like this, it was going to that summer soiree with Cove when they were thirteen. She wasn’t sure if he was planning on attending the homecoming dance, and she was too afraid to ask given how it went last time. Sure, they’d ended the night on a high note, but she didn’t want to put Cove in a situation where he felt like he needed to come for her sake. She wouldn’t be alone, anyway, Miranda would be going, along with some other friends.
What she had not accounted for was that she would be asked to homecoming, as a date, with a guy. So when her conversation with Noah had taken a sudden turn into a homecoming proposal, she froze. Had she heard him right? He can’t have actually asked her to homecoming. Noah was nice and all, they sat at the same table in Art class, and they were neighbors in English. Every now and then they would chat about assignments or what was going on in their lives, but she’d never gotten the vibe that he was interested in her like that. She realized that she should voice her confusion.
“C-could you repeat that?”
The boy’s dark eyebrows furrowed, but it was quickly replaced with an easy smile.
“Would you want to come to homecoming with me?” Noah repeated himself.
So Darcy hadn’t gotten it wrong, he had, in fact, asked her out.
“It’s okay if you don’t want to, I wasn’t even sure if you’d be going. I’d really like for you to be my date, though.”
And there he said it, again. Darcy Ryan had been asked out on a date by a real human person. She didn’t even really think it through when she answered.
“Yeah, that would be cool.”
“Cool, we can iron out the details later.”
With that, Noah left Darcy at her locker, going on his way to his next class. Darcy was still left stunned by the event, but excitement began to build within her. Darcy had a date to homecoming. It was Noah from Art, but still definitely a date. Darcy twirled her hair as she thought about what would now be the night of her first date. Her first date? Something about that didn’t sound right, but that is what it was. Darcy had always imagined her first date would be a little different, with someone different.
Darcy shook her head, closing her locker before heading off to her Biology class. Biology had always been a fun part of her day, not only because she had always enjoyed her science classes, but this year it was also one of the few classes that she shared with Cove. It even seemed like he was enjoying his coursework more than usual, which was a plus.
Darcy entered the science lab to see Cove already seated at their usual table. He was engrossed in the worksheet they had taken home the other day, rechecking his work. When Darcy got closer, he raised his head, giving her a smile.
“Hey,” he said, then turned back to his worksheet.
“Hey.”
Darcy took her seat next to Cove, and opened her folder to start comparing work. For a moment, they silently looked between each other’s papers. Darcy was thankful for the distraction, as she realized she was a little hesitant to mention what just happened with Noah. Despite the distraction, though, Darcy was still running through the coming conversation in her head. Her teeth began worrying her bottom lip.
“What’s up?” Cove asked.
Darcy’s eyes widened a little, and she schooled her expression.
“Nothing, I just-” Darcy looked up into Cove’s ocean blue eyes. “Well, um… You know Noah Brown?”
Cove just nodded.
“He just asked me to homecoming.”
“Oh.” Cove’s wavy eyebrows shot up. “I.. forgot that was coming up.”
He forgot about homecoming? How? It felt like everywhere Darcy went there were reminders plastered everywhere.
“So… what did you say?” Cove probed.
“I said yes.”
Cove hummed, eyes flicking back to his worksheet.
“So, do you… like Noah?”
“Well, yeah. He’s always been nice to me.”
“No, I mean…” Cove sighed a little, not able to make eye contact with Darcy. “Do you like him? Like… have a crush on him?”
Darcy felt a little shocked, this situation was definitely weird. Darcy and Cove had never talked about crushes before, Darcy still wasn’t sure if Cove was capable of having a crush. In fact, the only people who knew about Darcy’s crush on Cove were her family, who never shied away from teasing her about it.
“No, I don’t!” Darcy answered a bit too loudly.
Some of their classmates turned around at her outburst, and Darcy shrunk back in her seat. Everyone’s attention was drawn away from her soon enough, as the bell rang signaling the start of class. As the teacher got on with the lesson, though, Cove leaned over to whisper to Darcy.
“Why did you say yes?”
“Huh?”
“If you don’t like him, then why are you going to homecoming with him?”
“I don’t know?”
Dividing her attention between Cove and the teacher was a struggle, so Darcy pointedly turned her attention back to the front of the class, jotting down notes from the presentation. That didn’t stop Cove from prodding her about it, though.
“What do you mean, you don’t know?”
Darcy rolled her eyes. Cove was her best friend, but he could be really stubborn sometimes.
“He’s nice, I guess,” she offered. “And he asked.”
“So any nice person could have asked, and you would have said yes?”
“I don’t know, Cove.” Darcy shot him a glare.
Cove shrunk back a little, and Darcy immediately regretted her anger. It made sense for Cove to be confused, and Darcy had just let her emotions get in the way.
“I’m sorry. Can- Can we talk about this later?”
Cove just nodded, and with that, they got back to focusing on class.
***
Darcy and Cove were quiet on the car ride back home. Mr. Holden and Elizabeth hadn’t seemed to notice, as she was going on about some assignment for her Statistics class. Darcy just stared out the window the whole way, not sparing much energy to respond to her sister’s rant. She almost didn’t even notice when Mr. Holden had asked her how her day went.
“Oh, it was alright,” Darcy answered, and not really thinking, she continued. “A guy asked me to be his date for homecoming.”
“Oh!” Darcy could see Mr. Holden’s eyes widen in the rearview mirror. “And you said…?”
“I said yes.”
“Wow, baby sis,” Elizabeth said. “This’ll be your very first date, moms are gonna scream.”
Oh god, moms. Darcy hadn’t even thought about how her moms would have reacted to the news. She’d already messed things up the way she told Cove, and now she’ll have to explain herself to moms?
“Wow, you kids really are growing up, huh?” Mr. Holden chuckled. “First date. Wow.”
Darcy could practically feel the blood draining out of her face. She couldn’t dare spare a look at Cove right now. They hadn’t spoken at all since their conversation in Biology. She couldn’t imagine that Cove was holding any kind of grudge, but it still felt like she had some things to answer for.
Having found a new topic of conversation, Elizabeth started talking about shopping for homecoming dresses the following weekend. Darcy agreed to coming along, somewhat halfheartedly. If anyone noticed, they didn’t make it obvious. Eventually they pulled into the Holden’s driveway, and Elizabeth waltzed across the street toward home, likely wanting to be the one to break the news of Darcy’s first date to their moms. Mr. Holden likewise entered his front door, looking back to Cove before he did.
“You coming in, sport?”
Cove glanced at Darcy, then turned back to answer his dad.
“I’ll be in soon.”
Having her plans decided for her, Darcy waited for Cove to make the first move. Sparing her a glance, he started off down the street headed toward the beach. Darcy followed after him, catching up quick enough, and fell into pace beside him.
“So you really want to go with Noah?”
Darcy shrugged.
“It could be fun. Sure, I hadn’t exactly wanted him to ask me, but it’s not the end of the world if I go to homecoming with a guy I don’t have a crush on.”
Cove kicked a rock in his path.
“I guess I don’t get it. I wouldn’t want to have my first date be just anybody.”
Darcy bit her tongue. It wasn’t like Noah was just anybody, Darcy could maybe even consider him a friend. She realized that didn’t really make a difference for Cove, or, at least, that’s not what he meant. She still wasn’t sure why it mattered so much what she did, though.
“I don’t understand why you’re upset,” Darcy said.
“I’m not upset, I just-” Cove shoved his hands into his pockets. “It’s gonna be weird.”
“Weird how?”
“Like you’ll be on a date, and I’ll just be there, or to the side or something.”
“I didn’t know you were planning on going.”
“Of course I was gonna go. I mean, you’re going.”
Though his sentiment shot an arrow through her heart, Darcy couldn’t help but laugh a little. Cove’s head tilted to the side.
“That doesn’t mean you have to go,” Darcy explained. “We don’t have to do everything together.”
“You’re right, I just-” Cove shook his head, tousling his seafoam hair. It’s gotten really long now, almost past his shoulders, and it takes everything in Darcy not to touch it.
“It’s alright, Cove, whether you go or not is up to you.”
“Thanks.” Cove’s lips titled at the corners, grateful for Darcy’s acceptance. “I’ll have to think about it, I guess.”
“Well, cool. If you do end up going, we’ll still be able to hang out, you know. I wouldn’t make you a third wheel.”
“Yeah, I know.”
They stepped off of the paved street onto the dunes, the sound of their footsteps became slightly muffled in the sand. Gentle winds blew off of the ocean, filling the air around them with that familiar salty smell. They spent a little more of their afternoon together wandering the shore, the conversation moving to more enjoyable topics. For a little while, Darcy was even able to forget how strange things had been between them the majority of the day.
***
The week and a half leading up to the homecoming dance were almost a blur. During their time in Art class, Darcy and Noah would go over the things that they needed to decide for their upcoming date. Elizabeth had already received permission to use the family car, so she would be handling the transportation. On her shopping trip with Elizabeth, Darcy had picked out a pretty blue cocktail dress with tulle and purple accents, and Noah was planning on borrowing a blue tie from his dad.
Elizabeth and Darcy had spent the late afternoon with a little sisterly bonding time, helping each other with their hair and makeup. Elizabeth had picked a lovely sunset orange chiffon dress that flowed down to just above her knees. It was interesting to see their different tastes, which ultimately complimented each other. Darcy felt grateful to have the chance to have an older sister like Elizabeth to help her through all of these new things. Even though Elizabeth didn’t have much experience with dates, she had enough secondary experience through her friends that she would use every now and then to offer kind advice to Darcy.
“Aw, look at you two!” Ma cooed as they came downstairs.
Darcy blushed at her mother’s attention. Though, she had to admit she felt nice dressing up.
“Be careful tonight, girls. I’d like for the car to make it back in one piece,” Mom told them with a playful sternness, deep brown eyes glinting with mischief.
Elizabeth rolled her eyes.
“I’m very responsible, Mom.”
After the minimum amount of hugs and coddling, Darcy and Elizabeth were finally able to escape their mothers’ clutches. They were heading down the road to pick up Noah before they knew it. Darcy felt a little odd going to a school event without Cove there, but she reminded herself of all the fun that she could still have.
Picking up Noah was another love fest, though his parents were more reserved. They just took a couple of pictures before sending the kids on their way. Darcy had been a little nervous meeting Noah’s parents on what was technically their first date. They had been nice, though, Darcy could see how Noah had become such a nice guy.
They took their pre-homecoming party to a restaurant. Though there would be food provided at the dance, Elizabeth had explained that it was more snack-oriented than meal-worthy. Darcy ate what she could, though with Noah around this felt a bit more nerve wracking. Being on a date was hard, especially when she still wasn’t sure what was acceptable given her lack of experience, and her general romantic disinterest in Noah. He had given her a corsage to match his before they had taken pictures, and something about it had felt so weird. He seemed really excited, though, so she had held her tongue before spewing any nervous jokes.
The meal was nice, Elizabeth and Noah held the conversation up mostly. Darcy joined in when she felt that she had something to contribute, but there was nothing about the situation that felt immediately pressing to her. She was more focused on getting to the dance and meeting up with her friends.
By 7 o’clock, the dance had already been going for a little while. Elizabeth had announced that they had reached the point where they could show up “fashionably late.” Darcy had never really understood the expression, but agreed nonetheless, if not a little because she was ready to reach a point in the night where it felt like she wasn’t on a date with a boy and her sister.
After arriving at the gymnasium where the dance would be held, Elizabeth quickly ditched Darcy and her date to join her friends. Noah looked to Darcy.
“How about we find Miranda?” Darcy asked, but didn’t wait for Noah’s answer.
Searching through the crowd was easy, their school wasn’t very big, and Miranda’s curly, red hair was easy to spot, even in the dim light. Miranda was off to the side, near the tables, talking to a lanky person with dark skin and poofy hair dressed in black slacks and a white button up.
“Hey! Miranda!” Darcy couldn’t hide her relief to see her.
“Hey, Darcy… Hey, Noah.” Miranda shyly smiled.
Miranda was dressed in a sweet pink dress fashioned similarly to Darcy’s, with cutesy rhinestones around the sweetheart neckline. The person with her reached out to wrap an arm around Darcy.
“Hi, I’m Terri!” she exclaimed. “Take a look at this party!”
It wasn’t much of a party, Darcy noted. The music was a little dated, and the only people dancing were a few couples, and groups of much more outgoing kids that had no lack of energy. Terri seemed excited, though, so maybe Darcy was just missing out on something. Darcy chatted with Miranda, Noah, and Terri for a while. They had laughs, ate some food, and jokingly danced to some of the sillier songs. Eventually, the music shifted to something slower. Darcy hesitantly looked to Noah to see him already looking at her.
“Would you like to dance?” he asked, casually extending a hand to her.
Darcy just nodded, taking his hand. Noah led her out to the floor, and they swayed to the music. The lights were dim. Usually the gymnasium would be lit by the fluorescents hung on the high ceiling, but those were turned off, and instead the large room was lit by string lights rounding the floor and some floodlights pointed toward the garland covered walls. Noah looked handsome with his dark hair gelled and styled, in the crisp white button up and surprisingly classy second-hand tie. He was gentle, one hand on Darcy’s hip while the other lightly grasped her hand. Still, Darcy felt at this moment that something was amiss.
Everything was technically right, she was here at the dance with a nice, handsome boy, and he had been nothing but welcoming and polite all evening. She felt confident in her outfit, her makeup, and her carefully styled hair. Her friends were here, merely yards away, laughing and having a good time. The music was sweet enough, something that you could expect from a DJ hired by a small-town high school. Noah wasn’t even that bad at dancing.
After some thought, Darcy realized that there wasn’t anything all too bad about dancing here with Noah. He looked up at her with soft brown eyes and a kind smile, and he had always been oh-so sweet. She could do this again, she thought. It couldn’t hurt. Nice food, fancy clothes, and popular music weren’t all that bad. It was fun. She smiled to herself, realizing that her very first date had been a success, no running away involved.
As the song started to reach its end, Darcy had thoroughly convinced herself that there was nothing to be worried about. She was still looking at Noah, and he was looking at her. It took her a moment as the music swelled to realize that his face was coming closer to hers, and his eyes were slowly closing. At first, Darcy didn’t know what to do, but then she realized what was happening. A kiss. That would certainly top the pleasant night off. It would be her first, but she doubted that Noah didn’t realize that fact. Maybe it would be his first kiss, too. Plenty of people had first kisses at school dances while slow dancing with people that they liked well enough, right?
Darcy didn’t pull away or lean into it, but allowed Noah to pull her into the kiss, slowly closing her eyes and tilting her head down. It was light, barely a peck. She hardly even realized it began before it was already over. With her eyes still closed, she heard Noah chuckle a little. Darcy’s eyes fluttered open, feeling a little confusion.
“This has been really nice, Darcy,” Noah said. “Your sister is pretty funny.”
Darcy swallowed, nodding.
“Thank you for coming with me,” he whispered, a sentiment meant to lie solely between the two of them.
“Thank you for asking me.”
Darcy ducked her head, staring down at her feet. Noah chuckled again.
“I wanted to. I really like you.”
Darcy swallowed, feeling a little guilty. Why should she feel guilty, though? A part of her wondered. It’s not as if she can help who she likes.
“Thank you,” she said again, not wanting to put in the effort of saying anything she didn’t really mean.
The song ended, and changed to something a little more upbeat. Darcy felt like she wanted nothing more than to get away from this situation.
“I’m gonna, uh… I need to go to the restroom,” she said, and Noah just nodded.
“No problem, I’ll be here.”
Darcy scuttled away, hoping that she didn’t look too eager to escape the situation. She ducked into the women’s room, which was populated with lots of girls, some were reapplying makeup, while others were tearfully being consoled by her friends. Darcy locked herself in an open stall and sat on the toilet, burying her head in her hands.
She’d just had her first kiss. With Noah. Darcy had her first kiss, and she was still on her first date at her first high school dance, all with a boy that she just thought was alright. It all had happened so fast, and she didn’t really know what to make of it. There was a part of her that enjoyed the attention she had been given, a sweet boy coming in attempting to sweep her off her feet. Those quintessential high school moments. The other part of her just felt disappointed. At this point, she just wished it could have been Cove. That’s what she had always imagined, some silly yet sweet grand gesture from Cove asking her to the dance. Being picked up from her house by Cove and her moms teasingly taking pictures of them on the stairway of her house. Cove getting yet another chance to ask her to dance, and them getting lost in the moment like they had at that summer soiree that felt like so long ago. Cove shyly leaning in to kiss her after deliberating all night if he should.
Before she knew it, Darcy had tears streaming down her face. If only she hadn’t said yes to Noah. If only she had convinced Cove to come to the dance. If only she had the courage to even tell Cove how she really felt. This all could have been different. It could have felt right. Even if it wasn’t perfect, even if Cove hadn’t wanted to be her date, it still would have been better.
Darcy didn’t allow herself to sit there crying on the toilet for long, dabbing at her eyes with toilet paper and flushing it down. She took a deep breath and exited, washing her hands. The bathroom door opened, and she wouldn’t have noticed if she wasn’t immediately questioned by Elizabeth.
“Darcy, are you okay?” she asked.
Darcy pulled her lips into a weak half smile.
“Yeah, everything’s good.”
Elizabeth’s brows furrowed tighter, and she had a look on her face that said “don’t bullshit me.” Darcy broke.
“I just want to go home,” Darcy admitted. “But I don’t want to hurt Noah’s feelings.”
Elizabeth didn’t say anything else, and only tugged Darcy along by her hand. They exited the bathroom, and Elizabeth made a beeline to Noah.
“Hey, I’m feeling pretty wiped out. I think it’s time to head home,” Elizabeth said to Noah, who was in the middle of a conversation with another boy.
“Oh, okay,” Noah said.
Noah said goodbye to his friend, and Darcy stopped to say goodbye to Miranda and Terri on her way out as well. If Noah thought that it was strange that they were leaving early, he didn’t show it. Darcy felt grateful to Elizabeth that she had shouldered the guilt of heading out before 9. What would she have done if Elizabeth hadn’t come in when she did? Darcy was sure she would have suffered through the rest of the night silently, only more reason to be happy that her sister was there.
Darcy took the front seat on the ride home, and Elizabeth joked about keeping the party going when she turned the radio up loud. Darcy wasn’t sure how Elizabeth did it, but she had successfully erased any awkwardness from ending the night. Soon enough, they had dropped Noah off at his house, and it was just Darcy and her sister alone in the car. Elizabeth managed to pick up on the fact that Darcy didn’t feel like talking, so she left the music blaring, singing along to some of their favorites in a hilarious, obnoxious way. It had even managed to lift Darcy’s spirits, who joined in on the pitiful, energy filled renditions.
After a little while, Elizabeth pulled in to park at their house. The living room lights were still on, and Darcy dreaded the idea of walking into her mothers’ well-meaning interrogation about how the night had gone.
“I think I’m gonna go for a walk,” Darcy said to Elizabeth as she shifted the car into park.
“Okay, I’ll handle moms while you’re gone,” Elizabeth joked. “Just don’t stay out too long, you know how they worry.”
Darcy nodded, and ducked out of the family car. She walked to the hill behind her house. It was a habit that Darcy shared with Cove; anytime she needed to think or be alone, she would walk out to the poppy hill, even when the flowers were out of season. Something about being there in the evening, when the stars were out and the night wind tousled her dark hair, helped her ground herself. However, she hadn’t expected to see Cove out there tonight. When she looked out at the crest of the hill to see him sitting, staring at the endless ocean, she felt that this was exactly what she needed.
“Hey,” she said, taking a seat next to Cove on the grass.
“Oh, you’re back.”
“Yeah, I wanted to come home and Elizabeth covered for me.”
“Oh… okay.”
They sat there for a moment, breathing in the ocean air and taking in the night sky.
“I had my first kiss.”
She didn’t need to look at Cove to tell that he was shocked.
“Oh, wow. That’s uh- cool, I guess.”
“I didn’t really want to, it just… happened.”
“I’m sorry.”
Something about that shocked Darcy. What is there to feel bad about? She was sure that plenty of people probably regretted their first kiss, even if they wanted to do it. She decided to clarify, she didn’t want Cove to be angry at Noah or anything.
“It’s not like I didn’t want to. I mean- Noah didn’t make me. I just didn’t… I hadn’t thought it would happen and then, well, it did.”
Cove hummed, seeming to understand what Darcy meant.
“It was weird without you,” Darcy said, then cursed herself about how that sounded. “Not the kiss- um, the dance. It was weird not having you there.”
“Yeah- I kinda wished I had gone, too. Once it got here, I got worried about what I might be missing.”
“It wasn’t much. The gym was decorated, Miranda was there, there were snacks.”
“The event of the season,” Cove joked.
Darcy laughed, but it was hollow.
“Yeah, I… I don’t know. It was cool, except for the whole date part.”
“Yeah?”
“Well, I liked it. It was kind of exciting before. Thinking about how it would be my first date. Then it was actually happening and it was clear that Noah liked me a lot more than I liked him, or he just liked me differently, you know?”
Cove nodded.
“When we were dancing it was just weird, and after we kissed I just wanted to get away. I understand why you ran away at the soiree.”
“That was different, though.”
“I know it was. I just meant that I get it. Things just all come crashing down and then you realize you’re really there and it’s a date and… expectations.”
Cove didn’t say anything. Darcy laid back and stared at the stars. She picked out Andromeda in the sky. Darcy didn’t think much of the silence, but turned to look at Cove to see he was staring at her, his lips drawn into a taut line. She raised her eyebrow, and Cove took a deep breath before explaining.
“You look… nice. The blue is pretty.”
Darcy blushed and looked away, intent on finding Cassiopeia in the night sky that stretched above them.
“Thanks,” she uttered with some effort.
“I’m sorry that tonight was so hard for you. I wish I could’ve been there to make things easier.”
“That’s alright, there’s always next time.”
“Yeah, next time we can go together. And the time after that, and- and all the times. If you want- I mean. If you don’t have a date you really wanna go with,” Cove breathlessly explained. “I guess I just wanna say that I’ll be there for you. Whenever- always.”
Darcy felt overwhelmed with emotion. How could Cove go and say something so sweet like it was nothing? She shot up and wrapped her arms around Cove, squeezing him into a tight hug.
“I love you so much,” she cried. “You’re the best friend a girl could have.”
Cove laughed after recovering the breath she’d knocked out of him and returned the hug.
“It’s okay, Darcy. You’re my best friend, I always wanna help.”
Darcy felt tears prick at her eyes, and she squeezed Cove a little tighter before releasing him from the embrace. They laid back and stared at the stars together, Darcy pointing each constellation to Cove like she probably had a million times. Although the wind was chilly, the hill felt warm that night.