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I was born with the name of my soulamte on my wrist. This name was Danielle until I turned nineteen. This name is now Dan. I’m fine with this.
Phil always wore sleeves after the name changed. He knew he would love Dan, but he didn’t know if others would love him. Everyone thought that Phil would marry a Danielle but know one knew that had changed.
It was February 2nd and Phil woke up with Dan written on his wrist. He thought he was seeing things. He showered and it was still there. The name Dan was still there when he went and got breakfast. The name was still there. This was no trick of the eyes. Dan was a trans boy.
That day Phil wore long sleeves to cover up that his soulmate was trans. He was completed ashamed that Dan was trans but didn’t admit it to himself. Luckily it was a cold day that Phil wore sleeves. No one asked questions, no one even bothered to think about what Phil hiding. No one knew that Phil was hiding anything. No one knew what was going on in Phil’s head.
Phil was always straight in his even though he was told otherwise. Was he gay? Was he bi? Whatever he was he was going to date a trans boy.
Bad. Very bad. He new no one who had expressed an accepting vide towards trans people. Maybe he just hadn’t asked.
~
“Mum?” Phil asked, wandering into the kitchen later that day.
“Dinner’s on its way!”
“I was actually wanting to ask you something.” Diane motioned for him to come over and sit at the breakfast bar.
“Ask me anything.”
“Erm, well… What do you think about trans people?” Diane’s comforting face changed but she looked away before Phil had a chance to see what it looked like.
“Phil… You aren’t… Are you?”
“No, no, no. No. I’m just asking.”
“Good. Transgender isn’t normal. It’s not right. I understand homosexuals but not trans people. There is no way in hell that is sane.”
“Oh.”
Maybe his mum was wrong, maybe Dad felt different.
Phil was trying so hard to make Dan an okay thing to have written on your wrist. He was trying to make himself feel okay. He couldn’t fall in love with something that was wrong and he was trying to make it okay.
~
“Hey, dad? What do you think about transgendered people?”
“They aren’t right, talk to your mother about it. I have to go, see you tonight,” his dad snapped before walking out to the car to retrieve his phone.
Okay. Maybe his family didn’t approve. It didn’t mean that other people would hate him.
~
“Um, Pj, real quick. Do you think that if I dated a trans person it would be okay?” Phil asked a little more straight forward. Pj didn’t even reply. He ended the call and Phil was left with a cold feeling that Dan wasn’t right.
And Phil still hadn’t found a way for Dan to be okay.
~
Phil went to bed a little earlier that night. Of course he couldn’t sleep. Phil lifted his wrist and ran his fingers over the name written in black cursive writing. It hadn’t changed and it was clear it would never. No one accepted Dan.
Phil was going to find a way to accept Dan. He didn’t know how, but he was sure he was going to love Dan. He was sure. He loved Dan.