Work Text:
Anyone who knows Sukuna Ryomen would tell you that he was your average salaryman.
Which he was.
He worked a dead end office job at some black market company, clocked in mostly on time and went home at the end of the day. There was nothing particularly remarkable about him.
Sure, he had a nasty temper, but who wouldn't when they were wasting their life away on a 9-5, weekly schedule? The reputation he built for himself was brief, but particular and steadfast- expected; rough around the edges, resting-bitch-face, don't interact with him unless absolutely necessary. Some people even said he reminded them of that old curse of the same name- dangerous and hateful towards the world- huge. He even had the same markings on his face and body, inspired at a too-young-for-any-real-sense-of-responsibility age.
It was a mystery how the stoic man had landed any job with the faded tattoos, but he was here, and the rumors around the office were limitless.
Of the many gossipers in the office, Satoru Gojo and his small gaggle of co-workers were the worst of them. They were the exact opposite of him- almost too remarkable, too interesting, with too much to talk about all the time, too popular, loved by all. (Of course, compared to how people avoided Sukuna like the plague, you could say anyone without the last name 'Ryomen' was loved by all in their workplace.)
And yet, of them, the lanky, white-haired man was the only one who ignored the accusations floating around (ironic, wasn't it? He'd been the one to start the rumors in the first place), often coming to Sukuna's desk to fan the flames of the legendary temper himself.
Though nothing 'legendary' about his anger ever happened in regards to Satoru sticking his nose in his business, Sukuna would be the first to admit that their interactions were almost guaranteed to end with him resisting the urge to shove brown contacts violently into the bastard's eye sockets. He never did- never had time or a reason to waste his money buying brown eye contacts- but he was sure that somehow, the walking nuisance always knew exactly what he was thinking.
So, no, nothing particularly interesting about your average wage-slave, Sukuna Ryomen. That's what his co-workers would say, at least.
Of course, he preferred it that way, because if they knew about what he got into during his free time, they'd be singing a different tune.
While by day Sukuna was your average, hard boiled salaryman, once he clocked out for the day he became, you guessed it: a raging idol fanatic!
Oh, you would have never guessed that?
Neither would any of Sukuna's co-workers, so it's a secret he keeps with his life.
Sukuna's current obsession is upcoming idol duo, Kitty Hop!
Made up of the cute, bunny-person, Uraume-chan and sexy, cat-man, Toji-kun, the pop idols have plagued Sukuna's waking moments. He knows every lyric to every song, practices their choreography, and even has a few cosplay ideas up his sleeve.
More than bills or necessities, Sukuna spends his paychecks on merchandise and other exclusive perks the idols have to offer. So, yes, while his job is absolutely hell- and hiding his obsession is even worse- he needs to keep working to be able to continue pushing funds to support the loves of his life.
Uh, as you can see, 'super-fan' doesn't quite cut it.
The people at his job just wouldn't understand! Even if Sukuna had a feeling that they would, he wasn't going to take the risk to find out. There was no one in his life, let alone his place of work, that he felt close to, and for a while, he assumed that's just how life was.
Despite this, however, besides himself, there was one other employee at Jujutsu Tech who had a similar 'steer clear!' reputation.
His name was Kento Nanami, another average man living that 9-5 life.
A man of taller stature (though shorter than Sukuna, he supposed he was above average in build), blonde, recklessly parted hair, perpetual eyebags- again, your usual victim of society. Sure, more people took time out of their day to say good morning to him than Sukuna, but ultimately, they were relatively in the same boat, and that was enough for the taller man to develop a stranger's sense of companionship with him.
They rarely ever spoke, rarely had a reason to- their desks were on opposite ends of the office, and their work almost never crossed over- but even just the small, polite nods they gave one another in greeting was enough for Sukuna to put Kento at the tip-top of his 'co-workers I actually like' list.
Of course, no one else was on it, but that wasn't exactly the point, was it?
The two weren't friends, couldn't even be considered acquaintances, but being bombarded by that blue-eyed twink daily was at least a common ground they shared, so it was only a matter of time before that'd change, right?
///
The start of their ‘relationship’, an inkling of what could be called 'acknowledgement', happened on a Thursday.
It was a rather unremarkable one if Sukuna recalled correctly, which wasn't very likely with how the days had begun to blur into each other.
He didn't remember any weather forecasts for that day, nothing he'd worked on, not even how Gojo had annoyed him. What he did remember, was passing by Nanami's desk to get to the printers.
Really, the only reason he even remembered that, was because Nanami had brought it up to him, at the end of their work day.
He'd stopped him a few feet from the entrance, hands fiddling with one another and so tired-looking. Mind you, he always looked tired, never smiling and all wired up like the word 'sleep' wasn't even in his vocabulary- Sukuna digressed.
He looked anxious to be so close to him. Sukuna had barely felt the timid tug on his trenchcoat, and turned to look down at a man who wouldn't even look him in the eye.
He couldn't blame him for acting that way, really. The rumors were to blame, weren't they? However fearful Kento seemed to be speaking to him, Sukuna certainly hadn't expected him to clasp his hand tightly in both of his, as if shaking his hand. And imagine his surprise when he realized that the shorter man wasn't shaking his hand, but slipping him something discreetly.
Drugs...?
Did Sukuna seem like a drug dealer to him? Was it the tattoos? But wait. It wasn't drugs in his hand, it was-
"You dropped this earlier..." Just above a whisper.
It was one of Sukuna's most prized possessions: His limited edition, acrylic, 5-inch, Kitty Hop 3rd Anniversary keychain charm!
Uraume-chan's cute, chibi bunny face was staring back at him, eyes glistening, not unlike a lost child who had finally been reunited with their loving mother.
He... he'd... dropped it...?
Sukuna Ryomen had dropped Uraume-chan?!
He could kill himself. He wanted to fall to his knees, to beg Uraume for forgiveness- he could cry! He'd been disrespectful, careless, he should- wait, if Nanami had seen him drop this...
"Uh..." he chuckled nervously. "Thanks... But uh- !" he coughed into his fist. "This isn't mine..."
He felt his heart sink as he said it.
Oh, Uraume-chan... I've betrayed you...
"Oh..." Nanami said, still avoiding eye contact.
"It's my little cousin's!" Sukuna tried to explain. "A gift, so thanks... for finding it..." he trailed, taking one or two steps back. "I gotta go!" He spun on his heel, wanting to make it home as soon as possible to apologize to every piece of Kitty Hop merchandise he owned.
He was truly a fake fan, a disgrace- what a lame excuse he'd come up with, just because of the stupid reputation he'd built for himself. He needed to-
"Wait!" he heard from behind him.
When Sukuna turned around, Kento was looking down, unlocking his phone. He raised a brow.
"Don't worry... I- I won't tell anyone..." Nanami said. "See?"
When Nanami showed his screen, Sukuna's heart picked up speed, his jaw dropped, his cheeks turned a flustered, rosy red.
"T-Toji-kun?!"
"Shhhh!" Nanami pulled his phone to his chest.
Sukuna quickly slapped a hand over his mouth, looking around to see if they were being watched, if this was some kind of sick prank.
Kento's home screen was an image of the second member of Sukuna’s favorite idol duo, all edited with glitter and drawn hearts.
It seemed that the two of them not only shared a reputation, but also a common interest. It was the last thing Sukuna expected from him, just as he was sure Kento hadn't expected to find his Uraume charm.
Imagine, Sukuna having a Kitty Hopper as a co-worker!
Was this fate? Destiny? Whatever it was, this was the best day of Sukuna's life! They were kindred spirits! It was meant to be! He tried to smile (he wasn't used to smiling- whatever the expression on his face, Sukuna hoped it didn't frighten Nanami too much), and ended up pulling out his own phone.
"Let's exchange contacts!" he offered, doing his best to keep his voice down.
"I, uh- what...?"
Sukuna grabbed the phone from him before answering. "You think I'm just gonna let the only Kitty Hopper I know get away from me?" he scoffed. "This is too important!"
Nanami just nodded, like he understood (Sukuna was sure in his heart that he did), awestruck by the taller man's whiplash change in disposition.
"Um," Sukuna said once their contact information was saved. He saw Nanami's face and knew he'd gotten carried away. He had to save this somehow. "Thanks again..."
And before Nanami could give a response, Sukuna was headed for the train station.
///
The two of them hadn't talked much after the exchange, time passing the same way it had before.
According to Sukuna, the next step in their 'relationship' would be to gauge exactly how big of a Kitty Hop fan Kento was. No better way to do so than over drinks, right?
He was an S-tier Kitty Hopper, and if Kento was anything less, he'd have to tone it down a bit (which would be disappointing, but at this point, he was used to it). He'd ask him out for drinks and use his super high-level intuition to see if Kento was worthy of seeing Sukuna in his final form.
It sounded like a plan to him, and on his next break, he made his way to Kento's desk, trying to look as casual as possible. When he got to the blonde, he cleared his throat, waiting till he had his attention before offering:
"Would you like to go out for dinner sometime?"
Nanami's eye's bulged. His frown deepened in surprise, mouth opening and closing like a parched fish. His eyes scrambled around the office, anywhere but Sukuna. They were frantic, much like his mind, searching for an adequate response.
Sukuna himself floundered, realizing that the invitation had definitely come out wrong.
"No!" he shouted before lowering his voice with a wince. "No, no, I meant for drinks! You know, as... um... uh..."
He'd never done this before, and it was really showing. It wasn't like anyone had ever asked him out to drinks.
"Colleagues do... A completely platonic thing! I wasn't asking you out or anything... I mean, I was asking you out, but not like, out- out, you know...?" he faltered, Nanami's eyes never un-widening as he spoke. "You know what? Never mind, you probably don't even want to anyway, um-"
He turned away before he could make an even bigger fool of himself, but
"Wait!" It was Nanami's turn to wince, lowering his voice as well.
They really needed to stop doing that.
"I um..." Nanami was clearly inexperienced in this as well, much to Sukuna's relief. "Yeah." He nodded. "Let's... go for drinks."
"Okay..."
Silence for a moment, the two of them standing with not a clue what to do next.
"Um-"
"Uh-"
"No, you-"
"You were saying-"
"Uh-"
Sukuna panicked and held a finger to Nanami's lips, causing him to flinch. He also flinched, drawing his hand back as if burnt by the contact.
"You first..." he ended up saying once they weren't talking over one another.
"Today?" Kento asked, eyes not leaving where Sukuna's finger fell by his side, making sure it stayed there.
"What?"
"Are we going out for drinks... today...?" he reiterated.
"Oh!" He slapped a hand on his forehead when it clicked. "Yeah! I mean, if- if you... wanted to..."
Sukuna could kill himself.
Why hadn't anyone told him this would be so fucking difficult, and awkward, and so fucking stupid?
"Sounds good..." Kento pursed his lips.
Another spout of silence fell between them, and as they glanced around awkwardly, they noticed what a spectacle they were making of themselves.
Sukuna's face matched his hair when he made eye-contact with the people watching the exchange.
"And just what the fuck are all of you looking at!?" he bit at them.
They immediately got back to work. Even Nanami sat back down, shoulders hunched as he tried to keep his mind off the clock and how many hours before the work day ended.
"Hey, I wanna go for drinks too!"
Satoru smirked from over his cubicle.
Sukuna almost lunged at him.
"You're not fucking invited," he sneered, trying to ignore the obnoxious cackle he received.
Just a few more hours. They just needed to make it a few more hours.
///
Kento was the one to approach Sukuna at the end of the day.
Sukuna would say it was surprising, but in actuality, Kento always clocked out before anyone else in the office, not willing to give even a second beyond what was strictly required to the higher ups or their dead-end job.
"Ready?" he asked.
"Yeah," Sukuna said, more excited than he'd let on. "I know this bar nearby! It's walking distance." He'd almost grabbed his co-worker's hand, but decided against it, waving him along instead. "Let's go!"
This would be his first time going out for drinks with anyone, let alone talking to a Kitty Hopper in real life!
He was sharing so many firsts with Nanami! This was truly what life was made of!
At the bar, Sukuna nodded to the barkeep, eager to make a good impression.
"A table today, Ryomen?" The stitched man behind the counter asked.
"If it's not too much trouble."
He gestured to a corner and the two of them took a seat in a booth.
"Not here alone today, I see," the man said when he came to get their orders. "What can I get for ya?"
"Just my regular, Kenjaku, thanks."
"And you, sir?"
Nanami was staring at the stranger with an unreadable expression, eyes unblinking. He jumped when Sukuna kicked him under the table.
"They're twins..." he whispered under his breath.
Kento nodded. "Just a beer, please."
When they were alone another curtain of silence hung between them.
They'd exchanged numbers, but neither of them had sent the other a message since doing so. They were at a loss.
Two socially-awkward, closeted idol fans, what would they do?
Nanami was the one to speak first.
"He looks just like him..."
You know, except the stitches going along his forehead.
Sukuna nodded his understanding; he still thought it was rude of Nanami to stare the way he did. He'd let it slide.
"He's not as insufferable as his brother, though," he yawned. "Suguru's an asshole."
"Ugh..." A sound of agreement.
It was the only response Nanami gave, and the shorter man startled at the loud laugh it received.
What a strange man...
As they waited for their drinks and food, they made light conversation, learning just bits and pieces about one another.
Sukuna learned that though stoic and anxiety-ridden on the outside, Nanami enjoyed cutesy things, bright colors, and aesthetic themes. (Sukuna had noticed that his phone was Spring themed, when he took it to add his number to his contacts.) He loved bread, drove a nice car to work, and was renting an apartment.
Nanami learned that though somewhat recluse, Sukuna had a large family that [he] visited often, even keeping a picture of the aforementioned little cousin in his wallet (right next to Uraume-chan and Toji-kun, of course). He mostly ate meat, took the train everyday, and owned his own home.
Conversation flowed easier when they were alone, and when their drinks came, it was that much more comfortable.
"Let me ask you a few questions."
Nanami loosened his tie just a bit, but gestured towards Sukuna to continue as he took a quick swig of his drink.
Sukuna lowered his voice, leaning towards him as if telling him a secret. "When's Toji-kun's birthday?"
At the question, Kento seemed to get a bit more serious, leaning in as well.
"December 31st, of course."
Sukuna nodded, and like that the barrage of questions continued, the shorter getting through the test with no trouble at all, even as signs of getting a bit tipsy were coming through.
"Second to last." Sukuna's face was flushed, but he obviously held his liquor better. "When wearing their main wardrobe, how many of Uraume-chan's thirteen moles are visible?"
Nanami took a moment to think. Though his mind was a bit muddled by the alcohol, something in his bones told him it was a trick question.
"Six," he answered. "But whenever they raise their arms high enough, you can see a seventh, near-" He hiccuped. "Near their waistband."
Sukuna clapped quietly, a proud tear threatening to fall.
"Final question then."
Nanami nodded.
"Who do you like better?"
The question sobered him up immediately.
Was this also a trick question? Obviously Sukuna favored Uraume-chan, himself- was that supposed to be his answer too? Was he supposed to give the cliche speech about how he couldn't choose, about how it tore him apart because he loved the both of them equally?
He didn't want to ruin this. His first Kitty Hopper, his first friend. Sukuna was too valuable to lose.
Kento decided to answer truthfully.
"Toji-kun."
To his surprise, Sukuna only nodded.
"Why?" the taller prompted.
Another sobering question. Again, he took his time to think about it.
"I envy him."
A gesture to continue.
"I'd do anything to have his confidence," he said. "He has such a presence… I’m too shy to even look at myself in the mirror,” he sighed. "He's attractive, of course, but he's also..." He took a moment to find the word. "Inspiring," he finished the thought. “I want to be like him.”
Sukuna nodded again, wiping at the proud tears that were now flowing freely.
"That's beautiful..."
"And what about you, why do you prefer Uraume-chan?" he asked, not used to all the attention being on himself. (He supposed that was another attribute of Toji-kun's to strive for- he loved being in front of crowds and being showered in gifts. One day, Kento, one day.)
"They're an LGBTQ idol making their way in the industry," he explained with such conviction it felt almost scripted. "I'd be crazy not to support them!" he said. "They're super tiny and cute, I could probably pick them up with one hand!"
Nanami took a broader glance at him and nodded. He probably could.
"Plus," Sukuna sighed wistfully, chin in hand as his eyes grew distant. "I love bunnies..."
It was the blonde's turn to startle him with a laugh, and before long, their night ended on a high note.
///
While on the train, Sukuna changed Kento’s contact name in his phone, and before he fell asleep, sent a Toji-kun themed 'Goodnight!' sticker to 'Nanamin 💛🐈⬛'
He fell asleep just a bit disappointed that he didn't get a response.
Nanami had a habit of sleeping fairly early (he'd say, 'even if he went out', but really, he never went out), and woke up feeling awful that he'd missed the message. He changed Sukuna's contact name, and sent an Uraume-chan themed 'Good morning!' sticker to '🌸🐰❤️ 𝒦𝓊𝓃𝒶 ~ ❤️🐰🌸' before getting ready for work.
Sukuna smiled to himself when he woke up to the message, knowing that this was the start of a truly unshakable bond.