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Awsten is banned from seeing Otto for a whole twenty four hours, and honestly, he doesn’t think he will survive.
Despite all their usual precautions, Otto has caught a virus while on tour. Probably from a fan, because those fuckers seem to bring every disease imaginable to their pit. Luckily, they haven’t got a show for a couple of days, and it’s their last of the tour, so he’s in his hotel bed recovering. This would be fine, except Awsten has been told by Lucas that he cannot go near Otto under any circumstances.
“What if there’s a fire?” Awsten asks, following Lucas around the hotel lobby like a lost puppy. He doesn’t know what to do without Otto. Lucas ignores him completely. “What if I’m dying and the only way to cure me is a kiss from my one true love?”
“Then kiss Geoff.” Lucas snaps, then sighs. He stops walking and turns around, folding his arms as he stares down at Awsten. “Are you going to be a pain in my ass all day?”
“Yes.” Awsten nods. He’s always a pain in Lucas’ ass, it’s his primary function, the thing he’s best at. He’s a reasonable man, though, his silence can be bought. “Unless you let me see Otto.”
Lucas scoffs. “No.”
“Why not!”
“Because if you get sick, we’ll have to cancel the last show. And you’ll be a bitch about it, and I honestly cannot be bothered.” Lucas shakes his head disapprovingly, as if he’s already imagining Awsten’s whining about feeling bad. “If it makes you feel better, everyone is banned from seeing him. I’m trying to contain this.”
Awsten pouts at him. How can Lucas allow Otto to be all alone while he’s ill? It breaks Awsten’s heart to imagine him sitting alone in there, feeling like shit. All he really wants to do is give Otto a hug and tell him it’ll be alright. Otto is very self-sustaining, but Awsten chooses to be there for him anyway, because he can be.
“I miss my Otto.” Awsten grumbles.
“I know you do. But can you please go and be annoying to someone less inclined to lock you in the tour bus?” Lucas turns around and walks off again, and this time Awsten does not follow.
There is only one person who can put up with Awsten for an extended period of time, especially when he’s like this. Geoff and Lucas love him, of course, but they have their limit with him. If Otto has a limit, Awsten has never found it. He’s pushed and prodded but there’s no end in sight. They’re too similar in all the right ways. Awsten’s manic energy bounces off of Otto’s barely contained chaos until they’re both exhausted. Then they simply curl up together, on the bed or the couch or the floor, talking quietly until they both fall asleep.
Awsten needs Otto. It doesn’t matter how ill he is. He doesn’t even care if he gets sick. Otto is more important than that. Awsten isn’t about to kiss him on the mouth - although he wouldn’t have anyway, cause that would have been weird - but he would at least like to see him.
“Geoff.” Awsten says, crouching beside him on his hotel bed.
They’re sharing a room, so Geoff has received the full force of Awsten missing Otto. To be fair, he’s being remarkably patient with him. Mostly by ignoring him while he rants about how much he misses Otto’s face and his laugh and his abs and his face and his hair and his jokes and his abs. Did he mention Otto’s face? It’s very pretty.
“That’s me.” Geoff doesn’t look up from his Switch. He’s playing Zelda, as usual. “Get your shoes off my bed.”
Awsten huffs, but he kicks his shoes off before climbing back onto the bed beside him. It probably isn’t necessary for him to be this close to him, but better safe than sorry. “Geoff, I need a favour.”
“I am not helping you sneak into Otto’s room.” Geoff smirks slightly, his eyes still on his game rather than Awsten. “We’re banned for a reason.”
“Dude!” Awsten throws himself onto Geoff’s lap, getting in between him and his console so Geoff has to pay attention to him. “I just need to distract Lucas for like, ten minutes.”
Geoff sighs, trying to angle his Switch so he can still see the screen over the pile of Awsten on his legs. “What if he asks where you are?”
“Lie. Say I’m with a girl.” Awsten knows Geoff can’t lie to save his life, but it’s worth a shot.
“You want me to tell our manager that you’re with a random girl you didn’t tell him about? Do you want him to have a heart attack?” Geoff relents, putting his Switch down and crushing Awsten into a hug. “Do you really miss him that much? It’s been, like, four hours.”
It’s actually been five, but Awsten isn’t about to get pedantic. He isn’t counting, of course. If he counted the exact time since he last saw Otto, even when he’s in LA and Otto is in Houston and they don’t see each other for weeks, that would be borderline obsessive. So he doesn’t do that, most of the time.
Except that it has been five hours, seventeen minutes and forty three seconds since he saw Otto at breakfast this morning. He’s getting withdrawals. Only a hug from Otto can fix it. Geoff is great, but he isn’t quite the same.
“Of course I do.” Awsten wriggles until he’s sitting comfortably on Geoff. Knowing him well enough, Geoff does not try to move. “If you don’t help me, I’m gonna be the most insufferable person alive until he’s better.”
“How insufferable?” Geoff enquires, eyes narrowed.
“You will be forced to participate in all of my tiktoks.”
Geoff grimaces. “Fine. I’ll distract Lucas for as long as I can. But if you get caught, I’m blaming this on you.”
Which is how Awsten ends up outside of Otto’s hotel room door, knocking quietly while Geoff challenges Lucas to a Mario Kart tournament next door. When Lucas asks where he is, Geoff says something about Awsten sulking and taking a nap. Awsten resents that, because he does not sulk. He almost goes in to correct Geoff, before Otto opens his door.
“Shush.” Awsten shoves Otto back into the room before he can say anything and shuts the door behind him. “I’m not supposed to be here.”
“I know. I told Lucas to keep you out.” Otto backs away until he hits the bed, flopping down on it.
His skin is pale against the dark circles under his eyes. He has his long hair loose around his shoulders, cascading over the hood of his black hoodie. Not his hoodie - Awsten is pretty sure this one used to belong to him. It doesn’t look like he has a fever or anything, so he can’t be that sick. Awsten is probably fine to be around him.
“Why? Don’t you love me?” Awsten steps closer, and Otto drags himself up the bed, trying to get further away from him.
“Of course I do. The last thing I want is to get you sick too.” Otto coughs, trying to clear his throat.
“Because I’ll be insufferable?” Awsten mutters. He’s sick of people finding him annoying today.
“Because I love you, and I don’t want to have to cancel a show because I made you cough up a lung.” As if on cue, Otto descends into a coughing fit.
This time, Otto can’t stop Awsten from getting close enough to touch him. Awsten rubs his back until the coughing dies down and he can breathe again. Immediately, Otto shoves him away.
“Nooo, you’re gonna get sick!” Otto complains as Awsten tries to climb on him.
“I don’t care! I miss you!” Awsten pushes him over and lies on top of him. Otto huffs, but he wraps his arms around Awsten regardless. “See? That wasn’t so hard.”
“You are not allowed to complain if you get sick.” Otto mumbles, pressing his face into Awsten’s neck. “I warned you, I tried to save you.”
“Mhm.” Awsten takes a deep breath, absorbing the comforting smell of Otto he has missed so much. “What’s wrong with you, anyway?”
“Just a cold. I’ll live.” Otto squeezes Awsten in his arms.
Awsten feels almost giddy now that he has Otto back with him, and twice as much knowing that Otto is okay. Part of him was concerned that Lucas was hiding Otto from him because there was something seriously wrong. They all know that if something happened to Otto, Awsten would lose it. He would refuse to perform until Otto was alright - if he could do a show without him at all.
But Otto is fine, Awsten tells his racing brain. Otto is right here underneath him, looking very pretty in his hoodie and breathing. The last part is most important. Why did he even think that about the hoodie? Otto looks pretty in everything. Okay, his thoughts are getting gay. Time to think about something else
“Have you eaten?” Awsten asks.
“I’ve been meaning to call room service for over an hour.” Otto mumbles.
“Fuck room service. I’ll doordash you some soup.” Awsten pulls his phone from his pocket and holds it over Otto’s head so he can order.
“I’m sure room service does soup.”
Awsten puts his hand over Otto’s mouth. “Doordash also does as much chocolate as you want, so be quiet.”
Otto nods, then licks Awsten’s hand. Awsten shrieks and rolls off of him as Otto laughs. “Ew! Now you don’t get anything!”
“I’m sorry.” Otto giggles, leaning up on his elbow so he can see Awsten’s face properly. “You love me and you’re gonna do it anyway.”
“Am not.” Awsten mumbles as he very much continues ordering for him.
Half an hour later, Awsten has to sneak down to the lobby again to meet the doordash driver. He hears Geoff calling Lucas a motherfucker from the next room as they laugh hysterically. Assuming this is all still Mario Kart related and they’re not killing each other, Awsten rushes downstairs, thanks the driver profusely, and runs back up again.
“Success.” He announces, possibly too loudly considering he isn’t supposed to be in the room at all.
Otto is tucked back into his bed, propped up on his pillow. He smiles as Awsten hands him his chicken soup and leaves the chocolate on the bedside for later. Once Awsten is sitting on the bed beside him, Otto leans his head on his shoulder.
“Thank you for this. You really didn’t have to.” Otto says as he digs into his soup.
“Sure I did. I love you, dude.” Awsten says softly, and he means it.
He loves Otto more than anyone, in every possible way. Even in ways Otto doesn’t reciprocate, but that’s okay. Awsten has grown used to that, letting his life form around the hole it has left in his heart. They are still best friends, through everything, and that’s all Awsten really needs.
“You mean that?” Otto asks quietly, turning his head to look at Awsten with fondness in his eyes.
“‘Course I do. You know I do.” Awsten says it often enough that he must know, even if he doesn’t realise how much he means it.
“I do, but… I don’t know, never mind.” Otto shrugs and goes back to his soup.
“What?” Awsten asks, but Otto shakes his head. “Come on, dude, you can tell me anything.”
“I was just thinking, while I was in here on my own for ages.” Otto says. ‘Ages’ was only about six hours - six hours, five minutes and thirty five seconds, but who’s counting - but it felt like years. “About you, mostly.”
“Cute.” Awsten teases, poking Otto in the side teasingly.
Otto bats him away with a ticklish giggle. He puts his half-empty soup bowl on the bedside table and shuffles closer to Awsten. “I was just thinking… I love you so much. Like, too much? Probably not a normal amount.”
“That’s fine by me.” Awsten slips his arm around Otto’s waist and tugs him against him. They can’t really get any closer, already touching from hip to shoulder, but it’s the thought that counts.
“Yeah?” Otto asks. “Do you get what I’m saying, though?”
Awsten isn’t completely sure he does, but he knows what he hopes. That Otto loves loves him back, that this can be a real thing rather than a set of hopes that Awsten keeps locked in his head. All of it feels impossible, but Awsten has never much cared about the possibility of things. He tries anyway, and most of the time it works.
“I think this is the part where we kiss, but you’re sick and that’s gross. So I’m just gonna hug you super hard and hope you get the idea.” Awsten says, trying desperately to contain the stupid lovesick smile he can feel creeping onto his face. “Sound good?”
“Sounds perfect, like you.” Otto giggles, and Awsten about throws himself at him.
Otto rolls over on top of Awsten, and it’s like every other time they’ve cuddled. Except Awsten is trying to convey every single emotion he has felt over the past ten years, all of the pining and longing looks and jealousy. Unfortunately this seems to translate to almost crushing Otto’s ribs, which makes him cough again. Awsten keeps hold of him, rubbing Otto’s back as he coughs into his elbow.
“Fucking hell.” Otto coughs once it has relented again. “Sorry.”
“I think you should get some sleep.” Awsten says gently. “You really do need to rest before the last show in a couple of days.”
“Are you gonna stay? I don’t want you getting in trouble with Lucas.” Otto asks.
He rests his head on Awsten’s chest regardless, snuggling up to him and getting himself comfortable. It’s no different to how they usually cuddle, except that everything is different now. They should probably talk about it, but Otto is too sick, and honestly Awsten just wants to enjoy this moment with his Otto in his arms.
Awsten kisses Otto on the forehead, petting his hair. Of course he’s gonna stay, damn what Lucas thinks. He may be a germaphobe, but he loves Otto more than anything that scares him.
“Go to sleep, my lovely.” Awsten whispers, rubbing Otto’s back gently. “I love you.”
“I love you too.” Otto mumbles, and this time it means everything Awsten wants it to.
Awsten gets sick a few days later, right after they’ve played the last show. Lucas rolls his eyes, but he doesn’t get mad. How can he? He just won a hundred dollars, from his years-long bet with Geoff that Awsten and Otto would get together.