Work Text:
Korra stood at the edge of the cliff, Naga by her side.
“What can I even do now, Naga? What am I even good for? What good is an Avatar who can’t even bend all the elements!?” She cried out, pacing back and forth.
She felt the tears slip down her face.
“Goddamnit Korra-“ She muttered, planting herself on the ground, sobbing.
All of the thoughts and insults came back to her- yet this time- they were true.
“You’re just a half-baked avatar.”
“You’re the worst Avatar ever!”
“What good is an Avatar that can’t even connect with her spiritual side?”
You can’t save anyone now. Not as the screw-up you are.
Even Avatar Aang was better at this, and he was a child, Korra.
Her thoughts were loud- too loud. She couldn’t get any of it off her mind.
Suddenly, a terrifying thought emerged.
Let a different Avatar be born, then you won’t have to deal with being such a burden.
The thought was harsh- but she believed it was true.
Before she even knew it, she was standing on the cliff edge, overlooking the deep water below her.
If she jumped far enough- maybe she’d land in the water and not the land at the bottom. Maybe the fear of the fall would kill her. Maybe-
She felt the ice crack under her.
Wait-
Seconds later, Naga was pulling her back.
It was as if she was in a trance, and had been snapped out of it.
“Naga I- I don’t even know how I- I wouldn’t…. do that….” Korra comforted her polar bear-dog, who did the same.
With fear still coursing through her veins she made her way back home. Mako greeted her at the door.
“Is everyone still in there, moping about because of my failure?” She asked bluntly.
“Korra- you didn’t fail. It’s not like you planned for Amon to take your bending away-“
“But it still happened Mako! And it’s still my fault! A-and they’re all right- I’m officially the worst Avatar ever…” She muttered.
“Who’s… they?” Mako asked, setting a gentle hand on her shoulder.
“Everyone! All of Republic City, all benders and non-benders alike! Who’s gonna want a half-baked Avatar who can’t protect them? No one, Mako, that’s who.” Korra was getting even more frustrated, feeling more tears run down her face.
“Korra- none of us think that. The only ones who probably do are the people who have forgotten what all you’ve done for them with your time in Republic City. You are an amazing Avatar. You haven’t failed, and as long as Team Avatar is a thing, we are going to help you get your bending back. No matter what.” Mako said, determination and kindness in his voice.
It almost made Korra feel better.
“…Thanks, Mako…” She whispered, hugging him.
“Of course.” He responded.
The two of them went into her home, and she went to her room, doing her best to avoid eye contact with everyone.
She was successful, and surprisingly, was left alone for a while. She thought it was nice, being left alone for such a long time… but it wasn’t. She knew it was only a matter of time till her dangerous thoughts started crawling back to her.
End this cycle. Do it. You’re wasting everyone’s time with your hope and bullshit. Katara already said your connection was severed, so there’s no use. Hopefully the Avatar after you will be far more powerful and competent. Not that that will be difficult to achieve though…
Almost nightfall now, she couldn’t seem to get them to shut up.
She tried to cover her ears, pet Naga, and drive her attention towards something else- but none of it was working. None of it.
She was on the verge of another crying session when there was a knock at her door.
“Come in…” She croaked.
Her mother and father entered.
“Hey, hun.” Her mother smiled, taking a seat on the end of her bed, “how are you feeling?” She asked softly.
“I’m… as good as I can be right now…” Korra murmured.
There was silence. Korra couldn’t tell if she liked it or not.
“We are gonna help you in any way we can. Any way at all. You may be the Avatar, but you’re our daughter first.” Her mom said.
“Your mother is right, if we have to venture the world to get your powers back, we will. Anything to help you feel better.” Her father added.
“Thank you both… but… I think I just wanna be left alone for a while.” Korra countered.
“Are you sure? With such a large amount of pressure on you, maybe keeping yourself locked away isn’t the answer-“ Her mother tried to get through to her.
“No, I… I know… just for now, I would rather be alone. Just to think.” Korra tried to make it sound… less sad.
“Very well… We’re here if you need anything.” Her dad said.
With that, her parents left her alone. Well, she wasn’t truly alone; she had Naga (who was currently passed out) but still.
She wallowed in her pity till she fell asleep.
The next days were hazy, confusing and exhausting. It was like she was slowly moving through time, but everything was passing by all too quickly. Like she was the only one who couldn’t catch up.
Soon enough, it had been 2 weeks since she had lost her powers.
2 weeks since she became the weakest Avatar. A failure. A wreck.
She hadn’t spoken to many people, nor left her room. Her solitude was only worsening her condition and yet it felt so comfortable at the same time.
Her parents tried to get through to her, but she brushed them off. She knew they only wanted to help, but it was difficult. She didn’t want to have to ask for help, or even admit that she needed it. She couldn’t do that.
So there she was, training her Air-bending powers as well as she could.
That was when Tenzin interrupted.
“I’m assuming my parents sent you to check up on me? Well I’m fine. I don’t need anything right now.” Korra said, half-focusing on him.
“No, actually. They didn’t. I came here on my own. I…” Tenzin got closer, but Korra didn’t stop training.
“-You’re worried about me? Well I’m fine.” She muttered angrily, her air-punches getting fiercer.
“I know you aren’t Korra. How could you be? I just want you to talk to me, or your parents or friends. You experienced something traumatic, and have been bottling it all up-“
“I’m not bottling anything up!” Korra snapped.
Tenzin only raised his eyebrow.
“Ugh- whatever! I was the one that failed, Tenzin. I was the one that let everyone down. I was the one that was stupid enough to get her bending taken away!” She yelled doing one last move that completely destroyed one of the ice sculpture enemies.
“Korra-“ He tried to get through to her, attempting to give her a comforting shoulder-clasp.
“Don’t “Korra” me!” Korra pulled away, “I mean- what kind of Avatar am I?! A screw up?! I- I mean, your dad was taking down the freaking tyrant Firelord Ozai by the time he was 13! I’m a disgrace to all Avatars ever!” She ran out of the training grounds.
Sure, that might’ve been super childish, but with so much going through her brain- could she really be blamed?
She found herself by the cliff edge again. She didn’t even realize she had run so far.
As she took a deep breath, she let it out by screaming into the frozen tundra.
Just give in already, Korra. Do it. In a couple years, it won’t matter. A new Avatar will be here, and be far better than you. You’ll either be forgotten, ignored as just a bad mark in Avatar history or remembered for being the worst Avatar ever. No matter what, it just won’t matter anymore.
“I just wish I hadn’t wasted everyone’s time… just to be reduced to nothing…” She thought.
She was truly alone now. And as the sea called to her, so did death.
“Maybe the fall will be calming… soothing even. Like an embrace from the wind.” She thought.
And as she took the last step, the ground cracked… and she fell.
It was scary. More terrifying than she originally thought it would be. But… she supposed dying as a failure was better than living as one.
The wind wasn’t soothing… nor was it comforting. It hurt. It was rash and harsh.
It was also happening far slower than she thought it would- or maybe her thoughts were on hyper-drive, going faster to match the adrenaline in her.
As she braced for impact, her body was propelled upwards- and as her body shot into the sky, she felt someone wrap their arms around her.
She blinked only once before feeling her body getting set softly on the ground.
“Korra! Korra!? Are you alright! Can you hear me?” She heard a panicked voice.
She could barely respond before sitting up and vomiting on the ice and snow beside her.
“Okay- alright- you can still breathe, that’s good.” The voice spoke.
Korra had to register everything before even considering speaking.
“I’m… not dead.” She whispered, looking at her body, “I didn’t die.”
She looked up and over, only to see Tenzin’s startled and worried expression.
“I…” She tried to choke back a sob, but couldn’t.
She held onto Tenzin's shirt, pulling him close and sobbing into his chest, grabbing onto him as if he’d disappear when she let go.
“I- I was so scared- and I don’t even- I don’t know why I did it- I just- I just can’t live like this, Tenzin. I can’t- I can’t have people look at me, knowing how much of a disappointment I am to the Avatar line- I thought that maybe if I- If I just- died then you could all have a better Avatar- someone worth training, and celebrating… someone worth this title-“ She rambled, coughing from lack of air afterwards.
“Just let it out…” Tenzin murmured, rubbing her back softly.
“I thought that if I got good at this stuff, you could look at me with pride- the way your dad was seen- maybe people would like me the way they liked him- maybe if I just listened to all of your lessons, I wouldn’t be in this situation… and I wouldn’t feel so fucking pathetic…”
She finished, out of breath and tired.
“You aren’t a screw up, and you aren’t a disgrace. You aren’t a disappointment or terrible or whatever else your mind is telling you. You’re a teenager, with a heavy burden to bear and are doing everything you can to live up to a legacy. You faced a threat that no Avatar has had to face before. You are incredible, Korra. And I know for certain that my father would believe the same.” Tenzin's voice was soothing… calming.
It was warm and caring. Just as he was.
“Thank you… thank you, Tenzin.” She whispered, her voice was hoarse from crying.
“Of course. You- oh…. It looks like we have company…” Tenzin says, sounding surprised.
“Huh?” She asked, turning around.
“Well… Look who we have here.”
“Are you-!?”
“Avatar Aang, and it’s a pleasure to meet you, dear Korra. Or… Avatar Korra. Yes, that’s more fitting.”
He smiled. Korra admired him.
“Not much of an Avatar anymore… I don’t know if they deliver news to the spirit world but uh-“
“Oh, I know. We all do.”
Behind Aang, tons of the other Avatars appeared.
“But how-?? I’ve never had any strong connection to my spiritual side!” Korra said.
“The Avatar State is induced in states of emotional or mental distress… it seems like you conjured me up that way.”
He smiled… it was a gentle one, just like Tenzin.
“So… what… What now?” Korra asked.
“This is the part where I help you get your bending back.”
He smiled again, holding his hand to her forehead, just as Amon had done. She couldn’t lie, she was scared.
Her eyes started to glow, then went fully white. Her body lifted into the air, water, earth, fire and air all surrounding her.
After a moment of that, her body slowly landed back onto the ground, Tenzin approaching her carefully.
“Korra…?” He asked.
Her eyes were white, then she blinked, and they were back to normal.
“Did I-“ Her eyes went wide.
“Yes, yes, I do believe you did.” Tenzin smiled and laughed, helping her up.
“Let’s go baby!” She called, starting to bend the elements once more.
All of them this time.
“I’m not a failure… I never was. I was just… hurt.” She told herself.