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It was a normal lovely day at MILGRAM prison. It was dinner time so everyone headed to the cafeteria area and sat down awaiting for what they will eat.
Es enters the room and places a square box with the logo of some random Japanese pizza place.
"Hey, so uh. I felt nice uh, here's pizza. It's all your favorites by the way." Es says quickly running out of the room. Everyone stares at the box and Shidou finally opens it because he's a doctor and wanted to see if it was okay to eat. He opens the box and he stares.
Shidou lifts up the box to show everyone.
"So, there might be a shortage of pizza. Meaning... That there's only one slice." Shidou says.
"Tch. Well no shit Sherlock?! Ya think just because I can't see with one eye doesn't mean that you have to say numbers like I'm some baby learning them!" Fuuta hisses and Amane slaps his shoulder.
"No profanity!" She says, Fuuta rolls his eyes.
Everyone stares at the box of pizza.
"So, whoever likes cheese pizza should get it right..?" Kotoko says to break the silence.
But, coincidentally everyone liked cheese pizza. So they continue to stand there in silence. UNTIL FUUTA AND IS GAY ASS SNATCHED THE BOX FROM SHIDOU AND GOES OFF RUNNING WITH IT.
"HAHAHAHAAA L BOZO!!" Fuuta exclaims. He looks back and starts to run faster when he sees Kotoko CHASING AFTER HIM. Kotoko kicks him so powerfully that he flung across the room.
"Well, I guess this is mine now.." She says. Kazui takes the box from Kotoko and lifts it up so no one can reach it.
"Why don't we all fight each other for it....like a battle to the death..?" Kazui suggests. Everyone looks at each other and they all agree.
"On the cout of three. Three, Two...One, FIGHT!" Fuuta starts throwing punches at Kotoko and she blocks all of then sucssesfully. Kotoko grabs onto Fuuta, throws him up and kicks him again. This time, Fuuta ended up breaking the roof of MILGRAM and went flying out.
KAJIYAMA FUUTA, DISQUALIFED. REASON: FLYING OUT THE ROOF THANKS TO KOTOKO. FIRST PRISONER TO GET OUT
"NO WAY!! I'M FREE FROM THIS HELL HOLE!!" Fuuta exclaims, "THANK YOU KOTKOOOO!!"
Kotoko blinks at what she has done to Fuuta and shrugs it off until Mikoto walks up to her.
"Kotoko! What did you do?!" Mikoto asks her worried.
Kotoko turns around facing Mikoto. "What do you think? I kicked him out the roof..?"
"Yea, but we still need him in MILGRAM!" Mikoto rushes to his cell and brings out those extended grabby thinggies and gets Fuuta back down with it. "I'm so happy I have this.." Mikoto sighs in relief.
The grabby thingy grabs onto Fuuta pulling him down.
"OH, COME ON!! I WANTED TO BE FREEEEEee...." Fuuta whines and reaches the floor of MILGRAM prison again. "Which one of you mother f'ers got me back down hah?"
Everyone looks at Mikoto. He drops his grabby thingy and shrugs at Fuuta.
"I just thought Es would be mad..? I didn't want to get guilty!"
Fuuta glares at Mikoto and then to the others, and sighs.
"I guess i'm out...tch.." Fuuta walks over to his cells and sits outside the door, watching the others continure fighting.
Soon after, Haruka backs out of all of the commotion and sighs, looking at Muu. Muu looks at him dissapotioned and turns around. Fuuta notcies this.
"Haruka?" Fuuta calls out as Haruka backs up to his cell door. Haruka jumps a bit in shock and turns to see Fuuta.
"O-oh..Hello Fuuta..!" He replies. Fuuta motions for Haruka to sit down next to him, and Haruka does as told.
"Why are ya not fighting? I thought you wanted it the pizza too..?" Fuuta asks Haruka as he fails to make eye contact and stares at (a certain) someone in the fighting.
"I guess...I-I just don't wanna fight. I like everyone here...Kinda..and I don't really think it's right to do that.."
Fuuta thinks about what Haruka said. "Yea, but aren't you a murder? Like, we are all here because we 'killed' someone."
"W-well..yes. But I don't wanna really hurt the other prisoners...you know..?" Haruka mumbles as he fiddles with his hands. Fuuta nods.
"Yea, I guess I can see that." He replies and that was the end of that conversation. Haruka gets up and stands. Fuuta takes notice and starts talking once again. "Where are ya going?"
"O-oh, I thought there was no point since i'm going to be out anyways..So i'm going to take a nap."
"Ah, Kay' then. Goodnight." Fuuta waves Haruka off and watches the others fight for the last slice of pizza.
SAKURAI HARUKA, DISQUALIFED. REASON: FORFIT. SECOND PRISONER TO GET OUT.
The battle of the death continues, Mikoto v.s. Mahiru (but they can't throw a punch so they just argue for a while), Muu v.s. Yuno, Kazui v.s. Kotoko, Shidou v.s. Amane.
"Surrender to me Yuno!" Muu says, Yuno chuckles.
"Never!...But, Lets make a deal..."She says. Muu gets interested and stops fighting.
"What is it..?" Muu says cautiously.
"Take down Mahiru for me and I'll let you get me out.." She whispers. Muu thinks about it for a bit.
"Fine, This better not be a trick.."
Muu walks over to Mahiru and Mikoto arguing. She taps Mahiru on the shoulder and attempts to blind her with her really shiny earings. But Mahiru ducks and it ends up blinding...MIKOTO. Muu looks in shock. She hit the wrong person. Mahiru gets up and gasps.
KAYANO MIKOTO. DISQUALIFIED. REASON: MUU'S EARINGS SHINED BRIGHT LIKE A DIAMOND. THE THIRD PRISONER TO GET OUT.
And Mikoto drops to the floor.
"Muu! What did Mikoto ever do to you??" She seemed almost hurt because of what Muu did.
"I was suposted to hit you!..Not Mikoto.." She explains.
"Why me??" Mahiru asks. Muu points to Yuno trying to get Shidou out.
"Well...Sorry. NOT!" Muu gets ready to blind Mahiru until Shidou, mangaing to escape Yuno and Amane, Shidou jumps in and protects her. He didn't get blinded becuase he closed his eyes and...HE HAD A MIRROR AND THE LIGHT FROM MUU'S EARING RELECTED OFF AND SHONE IN HER OWN EYES INSTEAD. And like Mikoto, Muu fell to the floor.
KUSUNOKI MUU. DISQUALIFIED. REASON: HER ATTACK BACKFIRED, LITERALLY. THE FOURTH PRISONER TO GET OUT.
"Shidou! hubby!" Mahiru smiles as she hugs Shidou from behind, "Thank you!!"
"Don't worry..We should team up, You might not make it.." Shidou repsonds calmly. Mahiru nods and walks off with Shidou.
Yuno and Amane just somehow were watching the whole thing unfold and decieded to team up.
"You want to get Shidou out and I want to get Mahiru out, so why don't we team up...? Muu failed me so.." Yuno says looking at the younger girl.
"Yes, I accept your offer." She nods and they both start spying on the two.
Meanwhile, Mikoto was on the floor..Or, was it?
JOHN MILGRAM ENTERS THE BATTLE.
Miko- I mean, John gets up from the floor and looks confused on why everyone was being really weird. Like Kotoko and Kazui are fighting, and Amane and Yuno were spying on Mahiru and Shidou. It was all strange, but as long as there was fighting, he didn't seem to mind. John went up to Amane and taps the girl's shoulder. Amane turned around.
"Mikoto..?" She says. John shook his head. "John..?" He nods.
"Yea, Why is everyone fighting..?" He asks.
"Oh, we are fighting to the death for the last slice of pizza. apparently, cheese is everyone's favorite." Amane replies like it was no big deal.
"I swear, everyone here is crazy.." He mumbles.
"You are too! I remember you said you also liked cheese pizza!" Amane talks back and John rolls his eyes.
"So what if I like it? I'm not even a prisoner here!"
"Well, get it for Mikoto?..I'm sure he will enjoy it."
John thinks about it. Would Mikoto be proud? Probably. Did John want to fight over the most useless thing in the world..? Not that much, so John just stood there waiting for someone to fight him or at least alk because he was getting bored. Amane was no help, Yuno wouldn't be either. What other choice did he have?
Soon after John woke up, Kotoko and Kazui break off their fighting and Kotoko spots John, who she thinks is Mikoto. So she walks over to him, confused why he isn't stitting this out.
"Hey! Mikoto, I thought you were down?" She calls out.
John blinks and sighs. "Not Mikoto, John."
"Oh. Wanna fight?" Kokoto asks.
"Why not, I don't have anything better to do." John shrugs and Kotoko starts throwing a punch. John dogdes and pulls out those plastic Minecraft swords and starts attacking.
"HEY! THATS MINE!!" Fuuta yells from the sidelines he stands up and snatched the sword away from John. Once John was discrated, It was a perfect time for Kotoko to get him out, So she did.
JOHN MILGRAM. DISQUALIFIED. REASON: KOTOKO THREW A PUNCH. DOESN'T COUNT AS A PRISONER, SO THE RANKINGS HAVE NOT CHANGED.
And like that, John passes out.
"Huh, Thanks Fuuta." Kotoko say, Fuuta scoffs and bonks her with his Minecraft sword. "Do you WANT to lose an eye this time..?"
".....No." Fuuta backs away and back to the spot he was sitting in.
John, Well now, Mikoto wakes up.
"..huh?...Oh! Hi Koto!" Mikoto says, "Wait, weren't you fighting with Kazui? Why am I here..?"
"First, Don't call me 'Koto'. Second, we stopped. Third, I was fighting John." She answers.
"Ah...I see, Well..I'm out either way so.." Mikoto stands up and walks towards Fuuta. Fuuta notices and groans.
"What?"
"Nothing, Just wanted to sit here.." Mikoto takes a seat next to Fuuta on the floor.
"Okay, then don't bother me." Fuuta hisses. Mikoto, still smiling.
"No promises."
Fuuta sighs and watches what Yuno and Amane where doing. Until Amane comes towards the two.
"Good job both of you! I have made 100,000,000 off of you guys!" Amane says. Mikoto and Fuuta are confused.
"What?" They both say at the same time.
Yuno joins in, "Oooh! Amane! send me some too!"
"...What the fuck??" Fuuta hisses confused and Mikoto looks the same too.
The girls giggle and leave to go plan 0506's demise. (that never happens becuase Mappishidou is too powerful for Amane and Yuno.)
"What was that all about...?" Mikoto says.
"Tch. who gives a shit...probably some, I don't know...merch sells..??" Fuuta replies. It seemed unlikely to Mikoto but went along with it.
A while later, Haruka wakes up to see everyone still fighting. Well, It was only 0506 v.s. Yuno and Amane and Kotoko still fighting Kazui. He yawns and looks for Muu. She's still passed out on the side and Mikoto was annoying Fuuta. He looked down on the floor and saw..The pizza box. The whole reason the fighting broke out. He opens the box and takes the slice.
"HARUKA!!" Everyone exclaimed. (ex: Muu she was still passed out)
"..." Haruka sat there guilty of eating the last pizza slice.
"WE HAVE BEEN FIGHTING FOR 4 HOURS AND THIS HAPPENS?!" Fuuta barks out.
"I-i'm sorry!!...I just woke up..a-and I didn't know!..." Haruka stutters.
Everyone turns around when a new voice enters the room.
"You guys!.." They pant, "I gave you the wrong box!!....That was Jackalope and my box!...here's yours..." Es says handing a box of pizza to Kazui. "Enjoy..." Es rushed back to their room.
Everyone stares at the box.
"That was so unnecessary ..!" Mikoto says, the others agree. And becuase its like late at night and they are starving, They all take a slice.
Peace was restored to MILGRAM and Haruka wasn't given a slice.
(Don't worry, Fuuta sneaked him a slice bc he's a good brother)
THE END!
