Work Text:
One, two, three…
Nothing was working. Nothing was making him calm down.
Four, five, six…
Jaehyun slammed his palm into his forehead a bit more aggressively than he meant to. It made a dull slap sound, and once his hand found its place there he dragged his fingers slowly along his too-hot face.
He was supposed to be asleep—everyone else already was. But the deep, radiating pain that made its home in his abdomen was keeping him up—it was warning him that something was wrong, and he couldn’t possibly go to sleep now. It was a little known secret, but Jaehyun wasn’t entirely used to feeling unwell, and that only sent him deeper into a silent anxiety spiral.
The ache radiated deep enough that it almost felt like it was touching his spine, and he pressed his hand into his stomach in an attempt to quell it, the other hand still thrown over his eyes. Nothing happened, even as his hand sunk in so far he could almost map out the shape of his belly button under his palm. All the while, his heart raced a mile a minute and sweat began to bead on the tip of his nose.
He ditched his preferred supine position in favor of curling up on his side, uncharacteristic of his usual habits. The stomach cramps attacked him in waves, and they were so painful that he had to blink away tears. His face involuntarily scrunched up as his stomach gurgled uncomfortably, and he pressed both arms into his abdomen in a futile attempt to soothe it. He just felt so gross, so achy, so sick.
He then shifted slightly so only one hand rested over his stomach, rubbing back and forth gently. This time, it helped a little more and the painful cramps dulled down a bit. He sighed in relief and let his tense shoulders drop. He knew it was only temporary relief, but hope seeped back into him, that maybe it was just a normal stomach ache and he wasn’t really sick.
With the momentary comfort, Jaehyun fell into a somnolent, half-asleep-but-not-quite state until he was jolted awake unpleasantly by his stomach trying to tear itself apart again. It was horrible this time, yet it didn’t quite feel the same. This time, there was a rolling in his stomach that conveyed a sense of urgency.
Jaehyun tiptoed as quietly as he could to the bathroom and just as he was able to open the door and fling the toilet lid up, he was retching up the contents of his stomach before he could even form a coherent thought. It was uncomfortably loud, and he just knew he had woken someone up.
More sick escaped Jaehyun, burning his throat, and oh no, he could hardly breathe, causing his head to spin dangerously. Before he could fall backwards and knock himself out, he quickly leaned forward and propped his folded arms onto the toilet seat, resting his head in his elbows as he panted to catch his breath. He didn’t care if it was gross. He coughed and wheezed to clear the burning in his throat, but before he knew it, his body subconsciously moved itself to hover over the bowl and he was vomiting yet again. His stomach was in a world of pain, along with just about every other part of his body, and for a moment he remembered why he wasn’t used to being sick very often. Dizzy, he reached up to flush and close the toilet, then rested his head on the lid, feeling his heart pound against the cold surface.
“Jaehyun?” a tired voice half-whispered, half-called from the doorway. Jaehyun was too drained to look up and see who’s talking to him, let alone respond with how shredded his throat was.
“Jaehyun,” the voice repeated, this time with more urgency. “It’s Taeyong-hyung. What’s going on? Are you alright?”
I’m fine, Jaehyun would have said in any other case, but he knew it was no use to hide anything from the leader who seemed to have a sixth sense for his members.
“I-“ Jaehyun rasped, voice giving up on him mid-sentence, “-don’t feel good, hyung.” He cringed at how shaky and weak his voice sounded, something he hadn’t heard in ages.
“I see, baby,” Taeyong sympathized. “You threw up? Is your tummy upset?”
Jaehyun would have side-eyed the leader if he could, but he settled for a simple hum of confirmation which was slightly muffled by his elbow, clutching his stomach with his other arm to emphasize his point.
“Do you think you can get up? Your bed is probably a lot more comfortable than the floor,” Taeyong said, patting the younger’s back from behind encouragingly. Jaehyun nodded, though his mind wasn’t really present in his body at the moment. He propped himself up in a daze and stumbled back to his bed as fast as he could without passing out, with Taeyong’s strong hand on his back as an extra security measure.
As soon as Jaehyun’s body hit the bed, it felt like his consciousness had flooded back into him, and with that he registered his racing heart and the slick sweat coating his body. He took deep breaths to quell the creeping feeling that once again struck his throat—he had probably just stood up too fast, overestimating the capabilities of his sick body. Immediately after he laid down, a stomach cramp had him curling in on himself and hissing through his teeth. He didn’t know how it was so painful, when it was just some stupid virus that his body had succumbed to against his will. It ached horribly and he couldn’t help but draw his knees to his chest as he pressed his arms deeper into his upset stomach.
“Poor Jaehyun-ie,” Taeyong cooed, petting the younger’s tousled hair. “You really don’t feel good, huh.”
Jaehyun didn’t even want to respond. He wasn’t used to being babied, no matter how much Taeyong loved doing it. Heck, Jaehyun even did it to his younger members sometimes, indulging in it on occasion, but he preferred to keep it at what it was; just a little fun for the cameras to capture. But he knew he should’ve appreciated it when he was sure it was genuine, and he tried to settle his mind fully to appreciate the comfort Taeyong had to offer. He didn’t have to get up in the middle of the night, after all, but he did just for Jaehyun. He simply couldn’t afford to stay closed off anymore, not when this was as private as it got.
Jaehyun leaned in slightly into Taeyong’s touch, eliciting a small grin from the elder. He pulled in the younger closer in response so Jaehyun’s head was resting on his legs.
“How’re you doing right now? Is your stomach feeling any better?” Taeyong murmured, his natural vocal fry coming out with his low and calming tone.
Jaehyun didn’t have much to say, so he responded simply.
“Hurts,” he mumbled into his bedsheets. “A lot,” he added hesitantly, low voice wavering dangerously. It was the truth; it hurt a lot, so much that there was nothing else he could’ve pointed out.
“Well, that doesn’t sound good,” Taeyong pouted, cheeks puffing out cutely. “Do you think tummy rubs would help?”
Jaehyun couldn’t help the hot pink flush that immediately rose to his face. Taeyong, the tough-guy leader whom most people were intimidated by upon meeting… offering to rub his younger member’s upset tummy. That was a new one he could add to the list for sure; he couldn’t say he was surprised, though.
Jaehyun’s stomach ached so much that he didn’t even have it in him to reject the offer. He nodded reluctantly, fighting the grin that tugged the corners of his mouth upwards.
Taeyong rubbed his hands together a few times to warm them up before placing his palm on the younger’s exposed belly. He gasped audibly- “It’s so tight! No wonder it hurts so much,” he marveled, eliciting an embarrassed facepalm from Jaehyun, whose face matched his representative peach emoji in color at that point. He did have to admit that his stomach was starting to feel much better under Taeyong’s hardworking efforts. Even his racing heart was beginning to slow a bit.
Maybe it wouldn’t have hurt to let himself be vulnerable more often, to let down the stone-cold facade he wore so naturally, and let his true self face others for the very first time. Maybe it wouldn’t have hurt as much as he thought it would to open up to his hyungs. The ache in his stomach faded almost completely as a smile crept up on his face that he didn’t try to fight.