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“Hey everyone, I’m here! Can we start the meeting?”
Six heads looked up to the winged figure with braided hair descended dramatically from the sky. They all sighed.
“Barbatos. Fashionably late, as always,” the Tsaritsa quipped.
“Ehe… I swear I have a reason this time.” the god of wind made his way towards the table with the others, sitting himself down.
The hydro archon rolled her eyes. “Sure you do.”
“Everyone, let’s focus on the subject at hand.” Rukkhadevata addressed her fellow gods, “we’re here to devise a method of communication, outside… their influence.” Her eyes glanced upwards ever so slightly towards the island in the sky.
Barbatos piped up, “Despite what Egeria might have you all think, I have a valid reason to be late this time.” He reveals two small objects in his palm, showing the others.
“I got these from a coven of witches known as the Hexenzirkle. They once attempted to challenge me, but we made peace, and in return they showed me their communication technology. These look like ordinary trinkets, but allow holders to communicate with complete encryption from the divine. We might be able to modify these to suit our purposes.” Barbatos laid down the two devices on the table.
Morax and Rukkhadevata each picked one up to inspect.
“Seems they’re encrypted to the user’s power signature, so only the specified receiver can see the messages.” Rukkhadevata turned the device over, fiddling with it. “If we could modify it to each of our divinity…”
“That might actually work,” Morax commented.
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Barbatos: testing testing
Rukkhadevata: seems like it’s finally working
Tsaritsa: how do we know celestia can’t read this?
Egeria: only one way to find out
Egeria: fuck celestia
Egeria: I’m still alive it’s probably fine
Murata: oi Egeria, mind your language
Murata: there’s children here you know
Rukkhadevata: for the last time, just because I shrunk that one time I’m not a child
Rukkhadevata: plus I grew up again
Makoto: pfffft
Egeria: lmaoooo
Barbatos: lmaoooo
Morax: Can we act like mature 4000 year olds we all are, and stop being so childish?
Rukkhadevata: :(
Makoto: *act like mature 4000 year olds only YOU are
Tsaritsa: speak for yourself I’m only 2000
Barbatos: old man
Egeria: old man
Murata: old man
Morax: stfu
Barbatos: who’s being childish now
Makoto: not Morax and Barbatos using their archon names
Barbatos: that’s cuz my name is perfect the way it is
Barbatos: and Morax’s an uncreative old blockhead
Morax: Don’t look at me, look at the Tsaritsa.
Tsaritsa: what
Egeria: it’s not even a name it’s just her title lmao
Rukkhadevata: lazy fr
Murata: fr
Tsaritsa: I’m too cool for a name
Tsaritsa: literally
Tsaritsa: names are lame anyways
Morax: We’re getting a bit sidetracked.
Egeria: @Rukkhadevata aren’t you supposed to be briefing us about the devices
Rukkhadevata: yes, hold on
Rukkhadevata: these devices are designed for communication
Rukkhadevata: we each have one of seven, and they’re coded so only the corresponding archon can read the messages
Rukkhadevata: it’s based on divinity and energy signatures so @Makoto your sister can read these messages if she got your device
Makoto: it’s ok, we can trust Ei
Rukkhadevata: alright
Rukkhadevata: so we can basically use this to talk about anything only between the seven of us
Rukkhadevata: stuff concerning our nations, concerning Celestia, etc
Tsaritsa: sounds great
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Egeria: @Everyone Sumeru and Fontaine are holding a joint drama festival!
Egeria: events will be held in the opera epiclese
Rukkhadevata: with Fontaine being well known for opera and Sumeru for dramatic literature, and our two nations’ proximity, we decided this was the perfect opportunity.
Morax: I’ve heard, but unfortunately the rite of descension is coming up. I’ll have to make preparations.
Egeria: that’s alright
Makoto: Sounds fun!
Makoto: I’m sure Ei wouldn’t mind taking over for a bit, I’ll come
Rukkhadevata: great!
Barbatos: what events are there?
Rukkhadevata: you’d love it, there’s a whole segment about ballads and epic poetry
Egeria: and free drinks
Barbatos: o.O
Barbatos: well, Barbatos hasn’t been seen in centuries, but I’m sure the humble bard Venti would love to attend
Morax: You proclaim yourself the best bard of Mondstadt every day, that’s the farthest thing from humble.
Barbatos: shh
Egeria: @Tsaritsa @Murata wbu
Tsaritsa: I’m afraid I can’t come this time
Murata: everyone here’s so busy fighting wars they wouldn’t notice if I left
Murata: I’ll come
Rukkhadevata: great, I’ll make the arrangements.
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Murata: that production was fun
Egeria: of course you’d say that, it’s just people killing each other
Murata: yes and that’s fun
Egeria: you’re a psycho
Murata: you only just realised?
Barbatos: seems like the people of Sumeru and Fontaine can’t get enough of my ballads
Barbatos: the best part was the free alcohol honestly
Rukkhadevata: luckily you didn’t get drunk
Barbatos: my alcohol tolerance is both a blessing and a curse
Makoto: loved the food, especially the desserts
Makoto: bought a ton for Ei :D
Egeria: me and Rukkha’s duo acting performance is about to begin, come watch!
Barbatos: THAT WAS AMAZING ONG
Tsaritsa: Barbatos you are literally god
Barbatos: shh my name is Venti
Makoto: no joke though, loved the performance
Makoto: your interactions seemed very genuine
Murata: ship
Barbatos: ship
Makoto: ship
Egeria: I
Egeria: uh
Rukkhadevata: lmao she’s red
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Morax: I do not like the fact that you have all broken into my abode.
Morax: Neither do I enjoy the fact that you have all crowded into my bedroom with mattresses you stole from me.
Barbatos: smh you uncultured blockhead, it’s called a sleepover
Egeria: slumber party
Rukkhadevata: slumber party
Makoto: I made us all desserts
Tsaritsa: not sure about this
Tsaritsa: I have heard rumours surrounding the electro archon concerning cooking skills
Makoto: if anyone tells you that the shogun is bad at cooking, it’s Ei impersonating me
Murata: I remember
Murata: I swear your sister was trying to poison me or something
Makoto: I assure you she harbours no such intent
Makoto: only an extreme lack of cooking skills
Tsaritsa: lol rip
Barbatos: Egeria and Rukkhadevata are cuddling while they’re asleep
Barbatos: it’s actually adorable
Barbatos: I have Kamera photos
Barbatos: watch them deny the shipping allegations now
Murata: Barbatos I will buy you free wine for a year if you give those to me
Tsaritsa: as if, you spend all your money on weapons, you’re actually broke
Tsaritsa: I’ll give you free vodka for two years Barbatos
Makoto: I’ll send you the finest sake and wine in Inazuma for three years
Makoto: please give them to me
Egeria: guys wtf is this I just woke up
Rukkhadevata: why’d you wake me up
Rukkhadevata: I see
Rukkhadevata: Barbatos I will give you any type of alcohol for free for five years if you simply destroy those photos
Barbatos: those are all very tempting offers
Barbatos: but I’m keeping these
Egeria: COME BACK YOU COWARD
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Barbatos: @Everyone Mondstadt is hosting its annual Windblume festival!
Barbatos: you’re all invited
Morax: I’m available, I’ll be there.
Barbatos: aww, so nice of you
Morax: Don’t make me regret my decision.
Egeria: I’ll come if Rukkha’s coming
Rukkhadevata: we should go then
Barbatos: just a small request, if possible could you come disguised?
Barbatos: don’t want a big fuss of three gods being here
Barbatos: especially if I don’t show, questions will be asked
Morax: I was planning to go incognito anyway,
Rukkhadevata: you know what, good call
Rukkhadevata: wouldn’t want to spend our trip being gawked at
Barbatos: Anyone else?
Makoto: sorry, can’t come… maybe next year?
Tsaritsa: I’m not available either, apologies
Murata: I’m currently busy, sorry Barbatos
Barbatos: that’s alright
Barbatos: I’ll give you all a tour
————————
Barbatos: @Morax @Egeria @Rukkhadevata c’mon guys, you have to choose your windblume
Egeria: what’s that exactly?
Barbatos: traditionally it’s either a cecilia, windwheel aster and a dandelion
Barbatos: but really, it’s just any flower that’s special to you!
Morax: For me, I suppose I’d choose a glaze lily. It reminds me of a dearly departed friend.
Barbatos: that’s a nice choice… it was Haagentus, right?
Morax: That’s right, her name was Guizhong.
Rukkhadevata: I’d choose a padisarah, for similar reasons
Rukkhadevata: padisarahs now are actually a simulacrum of an extinct species of flower with the same name
Rukkhadevata: they had a vibrant, purple colour… but since Nabu died, they have all withered
Barbatos: that’s a great choice for a windblume, it’s certainly meaningful.
Barbatos: and you, Egeria?
Egeria: I’d choose the rainbow rose
Egeria: they’re actually more akin to lilies, despite their name
Egeria: in ancient times, they grew next to colourful roses with rainbow petals
Egeria: those have since gone extinct, and the name was taken by this flower
Egeria: they symbolise passion and romance
Barbatos: wait, are those the flowers you gave Rukkhadevata earlier?
Egeria: uhh
Egeria: so what’s your windblume, Barbatos?
Barbatos: well, I wouldn’t wanna choose, in case the people of Mondstadt got the wrong idea that there is a “right” windblume
Rukkhadevata: but if you had to choose one for yourself?
Barbatos: hmm
Barbatos: I’d choose the cecilia
Barbatos: an old friend of mine used to wear one in his hair
Barbatos: cecilias remind me of him whenever I see one
Morax: I think that’s really meaningful too
Barbatos: hold on, are you trying to distract me from the fact that you gave a flower to Rukkhadevata symbolising romance
Barbatos: …and they ran away
————————
Makoto: what is everyone’s thoughts on Khaen’riah?
Tsaritsa: the godless nation?
Tsaritsa: their technology is very interesting
Barbatos: I don’t really have much opinions on them honestly
Barbatos: I’d be a hypocrite if I condemned them
Morax: I’m slightly wary of them
Morax: not much else
Egeria: same as Barbatos, I honestly think of it as just another nation
Rukkhadevata: I think the existence of a godless nation is very intriguing
Rukkhadevata: just wish they’d stop using forbidden knowledge, it’s a mess to clean up
Murata: There seems to be a significant number of hilichurls coming from their direction
Murata: they should be careful
Murata: we all know what happens to nations that get too advanced
————————
Tsaritsa: so…
Tsaritsa: celestia’s summons.
Barbatos: fuck
Barbatos: that literally goes against every single one of my ideals
Barbatos: but it’s between Khaen’riah or Mondstadt
Murata: I don’t like this
Makoto: rifthounds are everywhere
Makoto: hopefully Ei and the others can hold them back while I’m gone
Morax: The adepti are defending Liyue, I am heading towards Khaen’riah.
Barbatos: it leaves a bad taste in my mouth to leave my people on their own
Barbatos: but it’ll be worse if I ignored celestia
Barbatos: I’m already there
Murata: Sumeru and Natlan’s taking the full brunt of the abyss creatures
Murata: I hate being part of a genocide but we have to stop the problem at its source
Tsaritsa: I’ll go with you
Egeria: I’m at the desert entrance of Khaen’riah
Rukkhadevata: I’m going into Irminsul, the forbidden knowledge is resurging
Murata: backup needed over here
Tsaritsa: I’m coming
Barbatos: @Tsaritsa what was that scream
Tsaritsa: Murata’s down
Tsaritsa: shit
Tsaritsa: I’ll try to contain the energy outspread
Egeria: Is she…
Makoto: yeah
Makoto: I’m there too
Egeria: dammit
Egeria: @Rukkhadevata how’s it going in your end
Rukkhadevata: contained most of the forbidden knowledge, I’m coming to fight
Egeria: thank celestia
Egeria: no, actually fuck celestia for putting us in this mess
Egeria: can you come to Tunigi Hollow, there’s a rift
Rukkhadevata: heading over
Makoto: shoot I need help
Makoto: I can’t contain the lingering energy of two gods while fighting the monsters
Makoto: especially not pyro and cryo
Morax: Tsaritsa fell? I’m coming
Barbatos: I’m going back to Mondstadt
Barbatos: there’s a fucking dragon
Barbatos: I’ll come back when I’m done
Rukkhadevata: I’m going back to Irminsul
Morax: I thought you contained most of it?
Rukkhadevata: yeah
Rukkhadevata: but when I die it’ll all come back
Rukkhadevata: I need a more permanent solution
Morax: What do you mean by “when” you die?
Rukkhadevata: do you really think I’m surviving this? I’m a goddess of wisdom
Rukkhadevata: the goddess of war literally died first
Morax: Hold on Rukkhadevata, what are you planning
Rukkhadevata: forbidden knowledge is tied to me, there’s only one way to get rid of it completely
Morax: Rukkhadevata, you’re not saying that
Morax: @Egeria
Rukkhadevata: Egeria won’t respond
Rukkhadevata: she’s gone
Rukkhadevata: there’s no other way
Rukkhadevata: it’s for Sumeru
Morax: Rukkhadevata?
Rukkhadevata: L̵̴̴̨̞̲̬̫͓̣̦͎̹͓̘̺ͫͧ́̿͊̃̍ͥ̈̏̚͘͟͜͞ě̡̨͍̞̞̥́ͮͥ́̽͑͋̈́̽̀́̾̽͘͢t̴͙͕̩̳͓͇̰̪̩̻͖̙̤͒̈́̊̌ͪͮ̂̄ͩ͆ͣ̔͛ͬ͑͛ͪ͟͞͠ͅͅ t̴̴̡̻̗͖̦̮̗̦̙̭̻̬̯͚̺̟͎ͤ̈́ͤ͛̍ͯ̂ͤ̉̉̾̂̈̽̀̉͋̓́ͧ̂͂ͣ͟͝ĥ̲͓ͮ͂̈́̒̐̈́ͭę̶̛͉͔̩̳̙̝̹̻͍̅ͮ͝͞ w̶o̷r̷l̸d̴ c͉̦̿ỡ̧̘̰̣̳̜͍̖̠͖ͨͧ͂̆ͪ̕͘͡͞ͅ_͋̋͘͡m̴̴̸̴̛̭͔̟̮̮͓̤̰̹͉͙̗͎͑̍̀̀̆̄̿ͩ͂ͪ̈́͆͑̕͘͢͡_͖ͮ̿p̴̶̸̧̢̳͍̗̪̟̹͎͉̜̬͈͔̖̩̺͚̼̉͒̃̃ͭ̔͐̌̓͐̓̽̊́ͯ͟͜͠͞͡l͕̰̬̬̗̺̗̲̍̉̅́ͤ̎̚e̡̗̘̦̅t̨͍̞̝̥̒ͫ̊͑̀̆̎͡ȩ̴̸̬͍͖̦̭̺̱̮͎̳̻͇̽́ͦ̔̊̆̀̑ͮ̃̇̔ͦ̽͑̚̚͟͜͢͝͡l̸̶̩͖͔͖̞̱̹̭̱̪͋̍ͬ̌ͨ̃̏̏ͩ̊͊̔̀ͣ̑͠ͅy̶̡̹̯̫͔̝̦͙̑̃͛̾ͥ͋̍͐̏͘̕͢͞ͅ f̶o̶r̵g̷e̴t̸ ̴m̵e̶
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Barbatos: shit
Barbatos: @Everyone
Barbatos: @Everyone
Barbatos: @Everyone
Barbatos: @Everyone
Barbatos: is anyone else alive
Barbatos: @Everyone
Barbatos: @Everyone
Barbatos: @Everyone
Barbatos: @Everyone
Barbatos: fuck please tell me someone’s still here
Barbatos: @Everyone
Morax: Barbatos?
Barbatos: thank fuck I’m not alone
Barbatos: I briefly got another one of my sleeping spells after using up my powers fighting Durin
Barbatos: you know how it is
Barbatos: how long has it been
Morax: It’s been a few days since you went back to Mondstadt
Morax: The fighting is mostly over.
Barbatos: is anybody else here?
Morax: I’m unsure of Makoto’s status, but it seems everyone else has fallen in battle
Barbatos: fucking dammit
Makoto: hello?
Barbatos: you’re alive? where are you?
Makoto: this is Beelzebul
Makoto: my sister didn’t come back
Barbatos: shit
Barbatos: Ei, I’m so sorry
Makoto: it’s not like there was anything you could’ve done
Makoto: I was always stronger on the battlefield, I should’ve went to Khaen’riah
Morax: Inazuma is safe, correct?
Makoto: mostly, but not without a few casualties
Morax: That’s all Makoto wanted, don’t blame yourself.
Makoto: I suppose.