Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

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“let me tell you a story.”

...

###

“You idiot! Why are you doing this to yourself? There’s a surgery to fix it, isn’t there? Go get it!”

The words fell out of Asriel’s mouth, but despite the caustic bite to them that reminded him too much of his time as a flower, he didn’t take them back. Because someone needed to knock some sense into Frisk!

Frisk furrowed their brows and looked at the crushed purple flowers in their hands. And then they shook their head and let the petals fall to the ground. Blood and saliva dripped from their lips from when they hacked up one of their lungs not even a few moments before. Inflamed red sores filled their mouth in a way Asriel never wanted to see again.

They signed, “You know why I can’t do that.”

“No I DON’T! So you’ll forget whoever this mystery person is. Big whoop!”

Frisk frowned, a stubborn look on their face. It was the same face they’d made time and time again as they refused to let him be—until they figured out a way to piece him together a soul and drag him above ground with everyone else.

“I won’t forget them.”

Asriel gritted his teeth together and ignored the tears that stung at his eyes.

“Yeah, well if you don’t you’re going to DIE! And since you can’t reset anymore, you aren’t going to come back! Do you want that, Frisk? Huh? Is whoever this dumb human you love worth it? They don’t even love you!”

Frisk looked at the flower on the ground with soft eyes.

“I won’t forget the people I love. I refused to give up on you, too.”

“Maybe you should have!”

Asriel’s words echoed through the clearing they were sitting in. Tears fell down his snout and he closed his eyes as he looked away.

A soft hand patted at his arm reassuringly.

This stupid hanahaki was eating Frisk alive. It came hand in hand with the resets. Frisk loved their family so much, but everytime they went back, everyone forgot Frisk. Everyone except Asriel who couldn’t love them back as a soulless flower.

And so their love went unrequited until they won it back, fighting tooth and nail every time. And Frisk went through it time after time as they kept resetting, trying to find a way to SAVE him.

Butterfly weed, forget-me-nots, snapdragons, black-eyed susans, purple columbine. …Buttercups. Asriel knew which case had belonged to him, and could make a couple of guesses about who the rest belonged to.

But the hanahaki always faded as everyone grew to love Frisk again. 

All except one case—purple hyacinth that choked them and flooded their lungs, taking root deep inside their soul. It was probably from whatever family drove Frisk to climb Mount Ebott in the first place.

“Please, Frisk…” His voice broke.

Frisk leaned forward and hugged him as they whispered into his ear.

“It will be okay, Azzy. You’ll see.”

And with the blood stained flowers on the ground in front of him, Asriel couldn’t help but see a flicker of Chara over Frisk one more time.

Maybe Asriel was forever doomed to lose his siblings to cursed flowers.

He spoke, his voice muffled by their shoulder.

“I love you, Frisk.”

###

...

“it's a thing now.”

“telling bad jokes through the door. it rules.”

###

“You know, don’t you?”

Asriel glanced over at the skeleton next to him, and Sans just shrugged.

“about frisk’s budding issue? …yeah. kid isn’t as good at hiding it as they think they are.”

“Yeah, okay, Smiley Trashbag. Any ideas on who it could be?”

Asriel didn’t exactly trust Sans—their past was rocky to say the least. But Sans was smart when he tried, and Asriel didn’t know who else to go to without telling someone who didn’t know about Frisk’s hanahaki. At least Sans had already figured it out.

Sans might be apathetic and lazy to the extreme, but he was scary observant. If there was anyone that had a chance of helping Asriel figure out how to help Frisk, it was him.

“nah. but hey, i wouldn’t worry too much about it. i be-leaf in them. and if everything goes to hell, well, they’ve got thyme on their side, don’t they?”

Asriel’s fur bristled at Sans’s dismissal.

He wanted to snap at him, but he was trying to do better. So instead Asriel took a deep breath in.

“They aren’t going to be resetting this time, so we only have one chance. Do you even care?"

If Asriel didn’t know Sans as well as he did, hadn’t studied him timeline after timeline as he tried to learn what made the skeleton tick, he might not have caught the slight widening of Sans’s sockets. But Sans’s expression smoothed back out so quickly that nobody else would have caught it.

“...what’s so different about this go ‘round? it’s not like they haven’t done it too many times to count.”

Asriel had never been able to figure out just how much Sans knew. The skeleton was infuriating like that—dropping hints and clues but never fessing up fully.

But Asriel wasn’t going to pad around the issue. 

“Because they got me, you idiot. All they wanted was for everyone to be happy, and they gave up their power to do that. They can’t anymore.”

Sans shoved his hands in his pockets and he stared out over the park from where he sat next to Asriel on the bench. He shrugged his shoulders, but Asriel could see the forced ease in them. And the grin on his face was a bit too wide to be natural.

“only one shot, eh?”

Sans’s poker face was better than anyone else Asriel had ever met, but Asriel knew enough to see the gears turning in Sans’s empty skull. He could see when Sans fully realized that this was it.

No more resets. No more loads. 

And that meant if Frisk died, they were gonna stay dead. 

Sans shifted and said, “...the kiddo’s got a whole lot of love, you know. they befriended everyone underground, so it’s probably someone from before.”

Asriel already had figured that much on his own.

He snapped, “So what can we do?”

“isn’t there a surgery for this?”

“Yeah, but Frisk doesn’t WANT it. They’re too determined to listen to reason.”

Sans shrugged, again, but it was more forced this time, even if most people wouldn’t pick up on that.

“...we can’t really do much then, can we?”

“You can’t just GIVE UP! What do we do?! You’re the smart one! You’re the one that should know what to do—”

Sans interrupted him. “why?”

Asriel hadn’t realized he was crying again until he reached up to scrub at his face and his hands came away covered in tears.

Sans sighed and gave him a sidelong look.

“...’m sorry, kiddo. i… i really am. but this is outta my hands. the only one that can do anything ‘bout it is frisk.”

Asriel was startled when Sans draped an arm over his shoulders and reached up to lightly tug on one of Asriel’s ears. It wasn’t enough to hurt, only enough to maybe bring a bit of comfort to him.

…It did help. A little.

“hey, why you goat such a long face? it’ll all work out. the kid’s too determined to let this bring them down.”

Asriel could only hope Sans was right.

Chapter Text

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“one day, though, i noticed she wasn't laughing very much."

###

Toriel stared at the blood speckled flowers cupped in her child’s small hands, and her soul stuttered. Frisk tried to shove them behind their back, but it was too late. Toriel had already seen them.

Even then, Frisk was unable to hide their painful hacking, or the saliva that dripped from their open mouth as they struggled to catch their breath.

Frisk had hanahaki for as long as Toriel had known them. From that very first night they fell into the ruins, they’d hacked up petal after petal.

It was a horror to see a child so young with hanahaki, because it almost always stemmed from a parent not loving their child. And children, with their big, open hearts, loving with their whole soul, only to be shunned.

And a case like Frisk’s… so many flowers and petals fell from their lips, it was a miracle they were still alive. 

Strangely, though the different types of flowers they spewed spoke of many unrequited loves, they hadn’t had it for long. The progression had been in its early stages. It was an odd case, that was for sure.

But Toriel didn’t think too much on it, because when they got to the surface, slowly, the frequency of their coughs died down and the different flowers dwindled to nothing. Toriel thought that with their new family, they had been able to learn what real love was. And that, maybe, it was enough for Frisk to heal and move on from whoever they left behind that didn’t deserve them.

She should have known better. Frisk didn't let go of things easily.

“Frisk! My child, are you okay?”

It was obvious they were not, but Toriel dropped to her knees and rubbed their back. Healing magic flickered at her paw as she tried to soothe them, but it didn’t do much.

When their coughing died down, they wouldn’t meet her gaze. They stared stubbornly at the wall in front of them.

Clearly, their hanahaki wasn’t as gone as she thought it was. But Frisk was a determined child. 

An independent one, too. Always trying to hide their problems so as not to worry anyone.

“Frisk…”

Toriel wasn’t sure what to say. So she just hugged them tightly. After a long moment, Frisk’s small hands latched onto her fur as they hugged her back.

Was she going to gain one of her children back, only to lose another?

She said, “It will be okay. Do not fret. It will all be okay.”

…Toriel wasn’t sure it would be.

She may have been trying to reassure herself as much as she was Frisk.

They were so small in her arms as she held them, warm and soft and not nearly as strong as they tried to be. She held them close to her chest, and murmured to them.

“I love you so very much, Frisk.”

###

"i asked her what was up. then she told me something strange."

###

Frisk got worse.

But they wouldn’t speak to Toriel about it. They refused to say a word about who they loved oh so dearly, but did not return their affections.

And while Frisk may have been able to hide the severity of it for almost a year after they got out, to the point where Toriel thought they were getting better, they were struggling to do so anymore. They were getting sicker and sicker, blood speckled petals attacking them from the inside as roots grew in their lungs and the toxins of the hyacinth poisoned them slowly.

Each day they wasted away in a hauntingly familiar way. Differences, yet so many similar things.

And so, after she had tucked Frisk into bed securely, and Sans had read them and Papyrus their bedtime story, Toriel collapsed back on the couch in the living room.

Undyne and Alphys were out for the evening, and Asriel was tucked into bed and sound asleep, and so it was just her, Sans, and Papyrus awake with Frisk. But Papyrus was sitting with Frisk for the night, watching over them to ensure they wouldn’t choke on flower petals in their sleep.

Sans plopped down next to her and put a hand on her arm, and Toriel couldn’t stop the frustrated tears that welled up in her eyes and began to mat her fur.

“Sans, I do not know what to do. I cannot lose another child! I cannot!”

Sans leaned back against the couch next to her and stared up at the ceiling

“heh. i wouldn’t worry so much about it. the kid’s a trooper, they’ll be fine.”

“You sound like you do not even care!”

Toriel did not mean to snap, but she was on her last nerve. She found that having to watch one of your children waste away into nothing for the second time did that.

“‘course i do. a ton. a skele-ton."

Toriel regretted her words immediately. She knew her friend struggled to show how much he cared sometimes. But care he did, because when Toriel looked closer, she saw a tear in his socket.

“...I am sorry. That was uncalled for. I am just so scared, Sans.”

Sans leaned over and poked her in the side

“don’t worry ‘bout it, tori. considering i don’t have any, i’m pretty thick skinned. you know what i think you could do with though? a distraction. i hear there’s a competition for puns. we could watch some recordings of that.”

And while part of Toriel wanted to continue to fall apart, she let herself fall into the warm comfort of her dear friend’s distractions instead.

Chapter Text

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"'if a human ever comes through this door… could you please, please promise something? watch over them, and protect them, will you not?'"

###

“Come here, you little punk!”

Undyne lunged towards Frisk with a wide grin, aiming to tackle them into the snow. But before she could, Frisk started coughing, and Undyne had to stop her forward momentum before she could barrel into them.

She ended up tangled in a bunch of limbs as she plowed into a snow bank, and suddenly Frisk’s coughs mingled with laughter.

She sat up and gave them a glare with no real heat behind it.

“It's not that funny!”

But it was harder to muster up her usual enthusiasm when Frisk was wilting before her eyes.

The kid was always full of energy! They beat HER and then proceeded to make it through the Underground before releasing them all! 

…It was kinda weird to see the way the disease ate away at their strength now, sapping away the fat and muscle from their limbs.

Frisk’s laughter only made their coughing worse, and Undyne rolled her eye before she stood up and brushed the snow off. She was… maybe a bit more careful then she usually was when she gave them a noogie.

Frisk’s laughter cut off as more flowers caught in their throat.

Frisk choked, and Undyne didn’t know her flowers well, but something purple began to slip past their lips. Frisk couldn’t inhale past the petals filling their mouth and their eyes watered as they tried to cough but didn’t have any air to do so.

Undyne’s eye widened and she reached forward and grabbed the flower by the stem that began to appear. She didn’t want to make it worse, but what else could she do?

It took a second, but eventually Frisk was freed and gulping down air as soon as their airway was unobstructed. They raised their hand to their neck and rubbed it.

It was getting worse.

Undyne stared at the spit and blood soaked bundle of flowers in her hand and she passed it to Frisk. They took it before they let it fall to the ground and looked up at her.

“I’m sorry about that! Let’s keep playing!”

She didn’t think much about it when she scooped them up and put them on her shoulders. Frisk’s legs still wobbled and they didn’t look great.

“Fuhuhuhuhu! I have a better idea! How fast do you think I can get us home? And then I can UTTERLY DESTROY YOU at Smash Brothers!”

Frisk giggled, the sound hoarse from their now damaged throat, and they held on tightly to her head. Undyne wasn’t sure who the complete idiot wouldn’t love Frisk was, but she knew one thing. They were missing out on a great kid. 

She’d be mad at Frisk for refusing to get help, but Undyne couldn’t help but admire their determination to stick to their choice. It didn’t matter, anyway, because she and everyone else would convince them to let go and get the surgery.

Undyne was stubborn like that.

She gripped their legs tighter as she hiked them up to a more comfortable position on her shoulders before she took off.

“Love ya, Frisk.”

###

"now i hate making promises. and this woman, i don't even know her name.”

###

“HEY PAPYRUS! Some kid at work today told me about this laser tag place! You have GOT to come with me tonight so we can shoot each other with lasers!”

Undyne burst into the living room, not paying attention to what was going on other than her new plans for the evening. Papyrus looked up from a jigsaw puzzle he was working on with a competitive glint in his sockets.

But then Undyne caught a glimpse of Frisk sitting next to Papyrus on the couch, wrapped up in blankets with a mug of tea in their hands as they watched Papyrus work. Asriel was sitting across from Papyrus, helping out with the mind numbing task, and Sans was across the room, napping on a beanbag that Undyne knew wasn’t there before.

“Nyeh heh heh! A challenge! I think you will find that I am very skilled when it comes to lasers! The most skilled!!!”

He shot Frisk a sideways look at their giggle before he directed his gaze back to Undyne.

“But you will have to wait until another evening to face me, The Great Papyrus, in a masterful lightshow of our skills! Queen Toriel left me in charge of Frisk tonight! And we are putting our puzzling passions to the test!”

That was nothing new. Papyrus was often left in charge of Frisk.

But what was new was the way Undyne faltered. Except Undyne didn’t falter. She just… decided not to say what she normally would.

Because normally, she would just tell Papyrus to bring Frisk with them. But one look at the small wastebasket full of bloody flowers and tissues next to Frisk, and the sunkeness of their cheeks told Undyne that wasn’t happening any time soon.

Before Undyne could say anything in response, Sans piped up from where he was napping.

“i’ll watch ‘em tonight. you guys go have fun. i’m sure we can puzzle out something to do.”

If that wasn’t an indication that something was wrong, then nothing would be. Because Sans NEVER offered to watch the kids. He was way too lazy.

Papyrus groaned loudly from his place on the couch and Undyne matched it. But then she glowered at Papyrus because she knew EXACTLY what was coming next.

“SANS! Your horrible jokes are ruining the piece-ful atmosphere of our jigsaw puzzle!”

Sans cackled, and Undyne rolled her eye.

“UGH! Jokes aside, don’t worry about it! I can beat Papyrus another night!”

Papyrus yelped. “Hey!!! I will have you know! That YOU will be the one getting beaten!”

Asriel looked at Undyne with an eager gleam in his eyes. The kid was always way too eager to see bloodshed… and was also probably Papyrus’s biggest fanboy.

But before Asriel could pipe up and say something, Papyrus made a sound of acknowledgement.

“Oh! You want to say something, Frisk?”

He said it loud enough so that Undyne knew to direct her attention back to the kid. Frisk looked between Undyne and Papyrus with a glare, familiar determination burning in their gaze. They still had spirit.

“Don’t stay back because of me! I’ll be fine! Go have fun! I’ll be upset with you if you don’t go!”

And of course that worked on Papyrus. The goofball caved the second Frisk said the word “upset,” but Undyne met Frisk’s glare with one of her own. The fire in their eyes was strong, though. They might look wimpy and weak, but that light gave Undyne more comfort than she would admit.

Because it felt like Frisk was maybe strong enough to hold on a bit longer.

So Undyne groaned.

“Okay, okay! Come on, Papyrus! Let’s go get some lasers!”

Chapter Text

###

“but... someone who sincerely likes bad jokes… has an integrity you can't say 'no' to."

###

Alphys would admit that she had romanticized the idea of hanahaki in her head. It was so very rare in the underground–Alphys had never actually seen a case of it. Since monsters loved so deeply and easily, completely unrequited love was a rare thing.

It was just so romantic! So moving! The deeply passionate care of someone causing them to choke up flowers in a physical manifestation of love!

She never really thought of the horror of it. Never really processed just how traumatic it was for the person going through it and all of their loved ones. Never thought of it as anything more than a romance trope that filled her shelves.

Frisk sat before her, a blanket wrapped around their shoulders as they shivered on an exam table. 

And because the peace never lasted for long—not anymore, not with how far the hanahaki had progressed—Frisk coughed. They coughed and hacked and struggled to breathe past the bright purple flowers, slick with saliva and blood, slipping past their lips.

Alphys hated this. It reminded her too much of the fallen down monsters in her lab, dripping red determination and blooming golden flowers filling her head until she couldn’t see anything else.

She shook her head and focused back on Frisk, a frown on her face.

“I don’t–I don’t think there’s anything I can do about this, Frisk. And you know your mom wouldn’t w-want you here.”

Frisk furrowed their brows, and they signed to her.

“Are you sure? Isn’t there anything we can do that wouldn’t make me forget?”

Alphys twirled her fingers, claws clicking against each other, and looked away from them. 

“Not–Not that I can think of. Frisk who is it?”

There was still part of Alphys’s chest that wanted to squeal at the thought of how much love Frisk had, that they were so determined to keep this person in their heart. But not when this was what it led to.

Not when it meant Frisk was dying.

Really, truly dying. Not the dramatic scenes in anime where a confession at the last minute would sweep in and save the day, but a slow painful descent into a terminal illness.

Frisk just firmed their expression at her.

“It doesn’t matter who it is. I don’t want to forget them.”

“Just… just consider it, okay? Please? F-frisk. We don’t want to lose you.”

And Frisk’s face melted. They hopped off the table and padded over to her.

“It will be okay. Do you think you could try to find a way to just… give me some more time?”

Alphys pushed her glasses up her snout and tried not to sniffle. The pressure was so high, and she wanted to help Frisk, but… There wasn’t anything she could do.

None of them wanted to force Frisk into the surgery. The chances of it working were so much lower when the person didn’t want it, and it couldn’t be repeated if it failed. But Frisk was so… DETERMINED.

“I–I don’t…”

Frisk closed their eyes, and it was a rare sight to see them so at peace these days. They were just getting so sick. But then they opened them and smiled at her.

With a grin so bright, Alphys was almost able to forget what brought them here.

“...Don’t worry about it. Hey! Why don’t we go watch some more of that anime… Don’t we still have like, a few hundred episodes to get through?”

Alphys giggled at the mention of the perpetually ongoing anime, but she sobered at the thought that Frisk might never get to finish it with her.

“Come on! It’s not going to watch itself!”

Frisk grabbed her hand and tugged her towards the door so they could go home, and Alphys trailed behind them. She squeezed their hand back.

“O-okay. …I love you, Frisk.”

###

"do you get what i'm saying? that promise i made to her..."

###

“C-come on, it’s over here! The new series that breaks the mold of all conventional anime and throws the tropes on their heads, but it still has such strong themes of friendship and—”

Alphys cut herself off abruptly when she came face to face with the bookshelf spread out in front of her. Next to her, Undyne skidded to a halt, too, nearly pulling Alphys’s arm out of its socket by accident.

“What’s up, Alphys? Isn’t it further down? DON’T YOU WANT TO SEE THE FIGHTING PRINCESSES?!”

And then Undyne closed her mouth when she saw what image was spread over the covers of the books on the shelf—purple flowers and long stems, the same shade and shape as the petals Frisk hacked up. Clusters of purple hyacinth.

The title of the book was printed down the spine.

Sorrow and Regret.

It was a new release—a manga that Alphys had heard of but had avoided reading, even if it was something she would have loved, before. A romance, where the main character’s love interest had passed away before she could confess, leading to a case of hanahaki.

It had a happy ending—or maybe it was supposed to be bittersweet. Alphys hadn’t looked much further into it. All she knew is that there were ghosts involved, and visits from beyond the grave.

But there would be no happy ending for Frisk, and seeing the same flowers that were slowly killing them spread across the pages of a book made Alphys sick.

Still, she reached up a hand and dragged her claws over the flowers on the cover, Undyne uncharacteristically silent next to her.

“D-do you think Frisk regrets something? Is that why they won’t let themself forget…?”

Undyne threw an arm over Alphys’s shoulders and tugged her roughly to her, giving her a noogie.

“Well, I’m gonna MAKE them regret something if they don’t get better soon! I’ll pull them back from the grave and make them do so many laps that they can’t feel their legs!”

Alphys let out a small chuckle and reached up to wipe away the tears that welled up in her eyes. She grabbed her glasses and cleared the fog off with her jacket.

Frisk hadn’t been able to do a single lap in months, too weak to muster up the strength. It would be nice to see them moving again.

They were running out of time. 

Alphys shook her head and nudged Undyne in the side, careful not to bump her too hard so that Undyne wouldn’t take it as a challenge.

“Yeah… Let’s—let’s grab them something while we’re here. I think the new manga for the series they like just came out!”

“HECK YEAH! Let’s go!”

Alphys prayed Frisk would have enough time to read it.

Chapter Text

###

"you know what would have happened if she hadn't said anything?"

###

Papyrus hadn’t always wanted to be a big brother. 

He had always been overshadowed by his father and brother, even if they were very kind about it. …Papyrus just couldn’t measure up.

And having another family member that would be just as great as (better than) he was would have been a lot to deal with! So Papyrus had been happy with the brother he had and hadn’t wanted another sibling.

And then he met Frisk.

Frisk who looked up to him like he’d hung the stars themselves, and even if Papyrus was amazing, he wasn’t quite skilled enough to put giant balls of gas in the sky. Yet.

Frisk who sat next to him now, surrounded by blankets, tissues and flowers, and was so very, very tiny.

“...Papyrus.”

Papyrus hummed as he pushed the page of sudoku back to them so they could fill out a number.

“Yes, Frisk?”

Despite how great Frisk was—and they were very great, indeed—Papyrus never felt second place. Not when they looked at him like that. Not when they went to him when they needed help or guidance.

No, Papyrus felt more like he’d won the lottery. Like he was just as great as he always proclaimed. When Frisk thought he was the coolest dude around, it was hard not to feel like it.

It wasn’t long before Papyrus realized he really did want to be an older brother. Or maybe he just wanted Frisk to be his little sibling.

“...Am I doing the right thing?”

Papyrus stilled.

Frisk would never speak a word of doubt to someone else, but Papyrus… they trusted him, even if Papyrus didn’t fully understand why.

He had always been the first one Frisk called when they needed something, even back underground. And now he finally had his chance to talk them out of the rather self-destructive decision they’d made.

Maybe Papyrus was great enough to save his little sibling’s life for once. He hoped he was.

He pulled out the pamphlets on hanahaki he’d carried with him everywhere for over a year and spread them on the covers of the blankets. They were creased and well read, and he hoped Frisk couldn’t see the tear stains on a few of them.

“Well. I understand why you don’t want to get the surgery.”

The others had been trying to convince Frisk that whoever loved them wasn’t worth it. That they weren’t worth dying for. 

But with Frisk’s big heart, that would never be the right approach.

“...But, have you considered everyone else?”

Frisk fidgeted, but they grabbed the pamphlet he pushed towards them. Details about the surgery they would hopefully get were spread across the pages.

“We all love you very much, Frisk! I don’t think any of us would be okay if we lost you. And I understand not wanting to forget someone you love, but if you are dead, you can’t love anyone!”

Perhaps that was a bit too blunt. Frisk didn’t seem to mind, though. They just frowned, the lines all too evident on their thin, sickly face. 

Maybe Papyrus was getting through to them. Well, he had one last card up his nonexistent sleeve to convince them. A special attack. He reached forward and tapped on a section of the page labeled “Post-Surgery Care Risks.”

“And lookie! Here!”

It wasn’t supposed to be a good thing. But it might be the tipping point for Frisk to convince them.

“If you run into the person after the surgery, there is a large chance you will remember them again!”

It would bring the hanahaki back, and it wouldn’t be able to be operated on a second time.

“It’s like a second chance! And everyone deserves a second chance. If they come back, you can try again!”

Even if Papyrus believed in second chances… he hoped whoever it was wouldn’t come back.

Frisk reached forward and Papyrus gave them his hand. They squeezed, and their grip was so… weak.

That was okay. Papyrus could be strong enough for both of them.

They let go to sign.

“If… If I see the person again, I’ll remember? But I’ll have some more time, first?”

It was only a chance, but Frisk seemed hopeful. They seemed like they were maybe about to make the decision.

“There’s a good chance of that, yes!”

They nodded, and hope surged in Papyrus’s chest. They reached forward and grabbed both of his hands again, and this time it was Papyrus that carefully squeezed.

And then, barely above a whisper, Frisk said, “Okay. I’ll do it.”

Papyrus sniffled. Loudly. He reached forward and pressed his teeth to their forehead in a kiss.

“I’m so glad. I love you, Frisk!”

###

“buddy.”

###

Monsters had overrun the hospital in the span of time it took Frisk to be prepared for surgery. There were stuffed animals and cards and distinctly no flowers as countless people tried to show their appreciation and support for the savior of monster kind.

“Out! Get out! I only want to see immediate family here! We need space!”

Papyrus stood up and assisted the doctor in shooing all of the scrambling monsters that didn’t live with them out. Politely of course! And then, finally, the room was empty of everyone save Toriel, Undyne, Alphys, Asriel, Papyrus himself, and even Asgore. (Who Toriel had seemed about ready to chase out, but hadn’t at Frisk’s request.)

The doctor brushed her hands against her coat and patted her pocket as she looked for a chart.

“Okay, is that everyone now? Still an awful lot of you…”

But… where was Sans? 

Papyrus cleared his throat.

“No! Sorry, but has anyone seen my lazybones of a brother? I swear, he is always late to the most important things!”

Laid out on the hospital bed, Frisk looked overwhelmed by everything. Asgore held their hands in his paws and tried to soothe them.

Toriel spoke up.

“I thought I saw him earlier this morning, but he seems to have disappeared? Perhaps he got mixed up in all the monsters that left. He is rather small, after all!”

Papyrus shook his head.

“Despite his small stature, Sans is well accustomed to navigating crowds!”

The doctor clapped her hands to get everyone’s attention. 

“I’m sorry you seem to be missing someone, but I would like to go over the risks and procedures one last time, and then we will be heading into surgery.”

She shot a glance over at Frisk.

“It’s… better not to waste much time.”

Frisk didn’t seem happy about this, looking around the room even more than Papyrus was, searching for Sans. As the doctor began talking to everyone else, Papyrus took a step back and called his brother. It rang, and rang, and rang, until finally, a long drawn out fart sound played.

“heya, sans here. heh, funny story, my phone and i are playing hide and seek, and whaddaya know it, but the phone is winning. i'll call ya back when i find it.”

The message continued on, and Papyrus glared heatedly at his phone and tapped his foot impatiently.

"hey, before you leave that message, do you want to know something about me? i love jokes. you wanna know something i hate? i hate long messages, so why don't you leave a short one? and i'll get back to you. if you leave a long one, don't count on it."

Finally, the message cut off. Papyrus was more conscious of his volume than ever when he hissed into the speaker.

“Sans, get your coccyx down here! Frisk is looking for you. Now is not the time for your japery! My response isn't the only thing that's short with you right now!”

He snapped his phone shut and slid it into his pocket as the doctor finished up her speech.

“And remember–You need to keep them away from whoever caused this case. If they see them, there is a chance the surgery could fail, and slowly they’ll get their memories back. And we cannot operate again.”

Over by the bed, Frisk waved their hand. No one else noticed, but Papyrus did, and he made his way over to sit next to them. 

“Yes, Frisk?”

“Where’s Sans?”

Papyrus frowned and reached forward to brush Frisk’s hair behind their funny little human ear. They leaned into the motion and Papyrus’s soul seized.

He needed this surgery to work. He needed it more than he’d ever needed anything.

“Oh, you know Sans! He’s probably off napping somewhere. He’ll be here when you wake up, though!”

Papyrus hadn’t even realized how panicked Frisk was until it settled into something more… resigned. Sad.

And then they coughed.

Purple appeared behind their lips as they gasped for air and choked petals back into their lungs. They grew red in the face and tears started streaming from their eyes as their wheezing grew weaker because they had no air to cough.

The doctor grabbed Papyrus by the shoulder, and Papyrus hadn’t even heard the yelling behind him.

“You need to get out! We’re starting now.”

“come on, papyrus. we’ll see ‘em when they wake up.”

Papyrus spun around to glare at Sans who now stood behind him, a stuffed animal held loosely in his hand. The doctors seemed surprised, but took the sudden appearance in stride as they shooed him out, too.

When Papyrus looked back at Frisk, the flowers had been removed, and the nurses were fitting an oxygen mask over their face. 

Sans reached out a hand and brushed it against Frisk’s before he was forcibly removed from the room.

“good luck, kiddo. we’re all rooting for you.”

The nurses shoved Papyrus and Sans out of the room.

Chapter Text

###

“You’d be dead where you stand.”

###

“so. it’s just you and me now, bucko. unless you wake up again. man, shoulda gotten a video of that earlier. you’re gonna laugh so hard when you hear about how loopy you were. it took you a while to recognize just about anybody in the room. heh, i thought papyrus was gonna cry.”

Frisk didn’t respond to Sans. Which made sense, since they were still sleeping off the last effects of the surgery anesthesia.

Sans tossed the stuffed cat he’d gotten Frisk up in the air and caught it as he waited by their bed. Up and down. Over and over.

The surgery had gone well. Well, as well as a surgery like this could go. But the docs had said they’d removed the hanahaki, and the memories were sure to go with it. A weight lifted from Sans’s chest as he let out a small sigh, and he ignored the hollow feeling in his gut.

(This was a bad idea, his whole being screamed. Sans didn’t think about why he might feel that way.)

Sans caught the stuffed cat in his hands and tossed it in the air again. 

“everyone else went to get food. heh, papyrus had to be dragged out, and i’m pretty sure tori only went since asriel needed to eat. you sure sleep through anything, don’t you? that was a whole circus in here. and i’m not even counting myself this time.”

Sans chuckled.

“just you, and me, and the sinking feeling in my gut. any ideas why that might be there, kiddo?”

Well. Sans had a bit of an idea. (He didn’t want to think about it.)

“maybe you do. maybe you don’t. it’s weird…”

Frisk stayed silent. Still, like they were dead, except for the heart monitor attached to them and the subtle rise and fall of their chest as they breathed. Okay, so maybe they didn’t look very dead at all.

“leaving me hanging here. well, that’s okay. i’m pretty good at talking to myself. heh, i’m probably better at talking to myself than i am at talking to you when you’re awake.”

Sans grinned, a wry stretch of his mouth.

“i never knew how to feel about you, you know that? the anomaly.”

Sans dragged the word out and chuckled. He wasn’t sure why he was speaking now, or so much, when he never had before, but something about it felt right.

(Or maybe, it felt like a goodbye. Maybe Sans spoke to drown out the hammering of his SOUL or the dread he couldn’t explain.)

“heh. you took away sunset after sunset like it was child’s play. there was no happily ever after with you around. i guess you were too busy spinning time around like a yo-yo.”

Sans chortled, because it was child’s play, considering a kid did it.

“...but, you know, it was a real nice thing you did for asriel. you’re a good kid. maybe you’ve got a bit too much power for a kid to have, but—”

He swallowed and squeezed the stuffed toy resting in his hands. A halting realization filled his words when he spoke next.

“...but you’re a kid, and you did the best you could with what you had. didn’t you?… heh. no one needed the kind of responsibility we all stuck on your shoulders.”

He stuttered over his words, but he couldn’t stop there.

“...you really are a good kid, frisk.”

They really were, weren’t they?

“everyone around you cares about you so much. and with this whole situation… well, you’re all good and wrapped up in so much love i’m surprised you can breathe.”

He chuckled, but it was a dry sound. Something desperate pushed Sans, and his next words tumbled out of him. 

“‘s like they thought that would fix the hole missing in you. like if they just said they loved you enough, it would fix everything. as if that could convince you to come get this surgery, or make it all stop in the first place.”

Sans squeezed the stuffed cat again, looking down at it instead of Frisk. He stuttered as he spoke.

“they—they said it all the time, how much they love you. but what’s the use? why did it matter?”

Frisk didn’t stir, and Sans’s soul clenched as his words poured out of him.

“come on kid, speak to me. that determination you got there, you were never gonna listen to reason. there’s no changing your mind. it doesn’t matter if i said it or not.”

(Say it, his soul screamed. Just say it. But what if it wasn’t true?)

Sans hated putting effort into something that would just be torn away, and Frisk was dead set on doing just that. Tearing themself away. So, Sans took an even further step back from the gaping distance that existed between them, that had grown wider and wider with every sunset overwritten. 

“it wouldn’t have changed anyth—”

Sans’s desperate words came to a close when Frisk stirred, and he dropped the stuffed cat by accident.

When they focused their blurry eyes on him, he cracked a grin and scooped the toy back up.

Something in him shook.

“heya, kiddo. you awake for real this time?”

Frisk looked up to meet his gaze. A wide smile split their face even through the confusion Sans could see in the tilt of their head and the slight furrow of their brows. 

“Hello! Who are you?”

…

Maybe they were still confused. The stuff the doctors used to put them under was supposed to make them as loopy as a bunny on a sugar rush. It already had, earlier. (This wasn’t the same.)

Sans shoved his hands in his jacket pockets, and it was hard to breathe.

His chest hurt.

(Didn’t some part of him know this was going to happen? Why did he care?)

"coma on, frisk. it’s me, your friendly neighborhood sans. sans the skeleton.”

Frisk shook their head, and now that the sleep was gone, their eyes were clear. Clearer than they’d been in over a year.

They weren’t loopy anymore.

“Sorry! I didn’t know there were any other skeletons underground. I only know Papyrus!”

…

No. 

…

That couldn’t be right.

…

…Sans should have known.

He really should have.

…He did.

Sans was fine. He was fine, wasn’t he? He needed to get out of here before he fucked with the results of the surgery.

Sans chuckled, and the sound was less controlled than he was going for. He stood up from the chair and forced his shoulders back so they weren’t tense. He made sure the grin on his face wasn’t as strained as it felt. His skull buzzed, strangely empty.

And then he reached forward and ruffled Frisk’s hair, ignoring the confusion on their face as he dropped the stuffed cat on their lap.

“ah, well. shame on me for not introducing myself. sorry, uh, i’ve cat to go now, but papyrus and tori and everyone should be back in a minute. here, let me just…”

Sans scrambled for his phone, ignoring the numbness that had set in. He sent a quick text to the group chat—frsk up. gtg.

He pulled his other hand back from Frisk’s head and tried not to think about it. He didn’t want to think about anything at the moment.

He was fine. This was fine.

“i let them know you’re up. it’ll only be a few seconds at most.”

And sure enough, Papyrus and Undyne racing each other was loud enough that Sans could hear them approaching from the other side of the hospital.

He gave Frisk a wave, the motion far harder than it had any right to be.

And then, with Frisk giving him an amused wave back, Sans took a step back through a shortcut.

He was fine. 

He was okay. This was fine. 

Sans was fine!

Sans’s skull rang as he staggered back into his room, and he let out a quick breath, trying to breathe past the sharp pain in his chest. In his soul.

He hadn’t thought about the possibility of it being him. He hadn’t wanted to believe it so he hadn’t, because Sans was nothing if not a master at ignoring his emotions.

The image of Frisk as they stared up at him from their hospital bed was burned into Sans’s skull.

Sans hadn’t realized it (hadn’t wanted to realize it) but Frisk hadn’t looked at him and been so lighthearted for years. Not since… their very first run-through. 

Before any resets. 

No, it was more than that. When had they lost that spark? Not their love, never that. Frisk didn’t lose love. If they had, this wouldn’t have been a problem in the first place. But their spirit, their… their trust.

Sans’s ankles caught on his mattress as he backed up, and he came crashing down in a pile of bones. He didn’t bother to get back up, and he brought a hand up to grasp at his shirt above his soul, phalanges twisting into the fabric.

He was fine. His bones were buzzing and everything felt too loud and too quiet all at once, but Sans was fine.

He forced himself to think. To use his hazy recollection of that first timeline so long ago when he met Frisk the first time. Bright, eager, achingly kind. 

When had their eyes started to dim when they looked at him?

So clear, so kind, so trusting, until—

“You’d be dead where you stand.”

Something Sans had a vague recollection of saying over and over and over again, timeline after timeline. 

It had been a joke! (No, it hadn’t.) 

It couldn’t just be that. 

“Sans, I’m—I’m sorry. This won’t be forever, I promise. I just need to do something—“

“heh. don’t go tossin’ round promises like candy, kid. ‘specially when you can’t keep ‘em.”

Did he treat Frisk like family? Did he ever do anything other than treat them with the same cheerfulness and callousness he might a stranger?

Words poured out from him, despite the fact Frisk wasn’t there anymore.

“you really are a good kid, frisk. a good kid. a real good kid.”

Sans clawed at his skull, pressing the base of his metacarpals into his sockets as his grin widened, and a small giggle slipped past his teeth. 

Maybe Sans wasn’t fine.

Sans should have fucking known it was him killing Frisk. He should have known that he wasn’t as good of an actor as he thought, that his conflicted feelings were on bare display for the kid to see—

He could have fixed this. He could have just told them—

There was an itch in the back of Sans’s mouth, scratching at his magic, even as he struggled to take quick, gasping breaths in.

A cough forced its way out of him and wracked his body. Something small and slimy caught in his teeth, and he spat it into his hand as tears pricked at his sockets. 

He drew back and looked at the pink petals that came from his magic.

He crushed them in his grip as the tears in his sockets fell down his face. A louder laugh escaped him.

And then he laughed again as he dropped the petals to the ground and grabbed back at his skull. His shoulders shook as he sobbed and giggled hysterically.

He spoke into his hands, his metacarpals digging into his sockets as a wide, desperate grin crossed his face.

“i love you, frisk.”

But it was too late.

Chapter Text

"Mom? Who was that? The person that was in here when I woke up? He gave me this and then left."

Dead silence cut through the chatter that had burst into the hospital room when Frisk's family had piled in, and Frisk's head ached. It must have been an after effect from the surgery.

Mom’s face scrunched up all funny as she opened her mouth and closed it again a few times.

"Was someone else in here? It should have only been Sans, I thought. And he was the one with the cat before we left… Frisk, how are you feeling? You do not seem to be as… well, loopy is perhaps the best word."

Frisk nodded, and signed, wincing as a lance of pain went through their skull.

"I don’t think I’m loopy…? And, yes! He said his name was S-A-N-S. Who is he? Why haven't I met him before?"

Frisk could have heard a pin drop in the silence that followed. They squinted up at Mom as her eyes went wide and she grabbed at her shirt, right above her chest. In response, Frisk clutched the stuffed toy cat the familiar stranger had left closer to themself.

"...You do not mean you met another Sans, do you?"

Frisk furrowed their brows, their soul sinking as more sharp pain shot through their head. "I don't know any Sans, though?"

The sound of shattering glass rang through the room, and Frisk looked over to see a bag with the hospital gift store’s logo on it spilled onto its side by Alphys’s feet. Water spread slowly, along with small white flecks of some kind.

Frisk's eyes widened, and a jolt of panic shot through them. "Alphys! Are you okay?"

Her eyes were wide and glassy, and she reached down with shaking hands to scoop the bag back up as she stuttered out her response.

"I'm—I'm fine. I'm fine."

Asgore put a giant paw on her shoulder, and Frisk didn't understand why he looked so sad all of a sudden. He looked sad a lot, but this was weird.

Papyrus burst forward, his sockets wide, as he held up 4 of his phalanges. His normal grin was… tight.

“This is definitely not at all very concerning! How are you feeling, Frisk? How many phalanges am I holding up?”

Frisk answered slowly.

“I’m… I’m okay. My head kinda hurts, but it’s not so bad. You’re holding up four fingers.”

He nodded rapidly, but despite the fact that Frisk answered right, he looked more upset instead of less.

“Good, good! That’s good! Now, what day is it? Who do you live with?”

Frisk grimaced as they looked at him.

“It’s Sunday, uhhh…. June 30th, I think? I dunno, I wasn’t paying attention. I live with you, Mom, Undyne, Alphys, and Asriel when he’s not staying with Asgore.”

Papyrus’s grin got even tighter, and he tapped his foot rapidly against the ground as he drummed his fingers against his thigh.

“No one else? You don’t live with anyone else at all?”

“I… uh… Rocky? Our pet rock? Did… Did someone feed him? Who was supposed to feed him…?”

Ow! Ow ow, ow! Frisk’s head hurt!  

Frisk’s eyes were blurry with unshed tears as Papyrus sprung back a few feet. He turned around and paced the length of the room. 

Frisk signed, "What's going on—"

Before Frisk finished their question, Undyne lunged for the chart at the bottom of their bed, rattling the whole frame. 

“What the HELL? Why are you all just standing there? CALL THE DOCTOR! How the hell could they have messed up this bad? Now Frisk forgot Sans and they’re still in danger!”

Forgot? Did Frisk know Sans?

“i’m sans. sans the skeleton. i’m actually supposed to be on watch for humans right now.”

Undyne shook her fist and then slammed the clipboard back down, lunging for the door. 

“DOCTOR, GET YOUR BU—“

Asgore tugged her into his side, and it seemed like it was a hug just as much as it was a way to stop her. His voice was low and gentle when he responded, but his breathing got funny near the end.

“Now, now, Undyne. There’s no need to fret. This is all just a misunderstanding. We’ve clearly forgotten to introduce Sans and Frisk in the first place.”

What was going on? There was something wrong here, but the more Frisk thought, the worse they hurt. Their head rang, and dizziness blurred their vision.

Asgore’s shoulders hunched, and he looked over at Mom. At that, Mom’s expression melted away from a pale, shaky look, into a too wide smile. Her eyes were still pinched as she cleared her throat and she placed her paws firmly on Asriel’s shoulders.

Mom’s voice was just as tight as Papyrus’s smile had been when she responded.

“Yes, you’re right, Asgore. We must have.”

Frisk furrowed their brows again, a grimace pulling at their mouth as they signed.

“You don’t agree with Asgore. Mom, you never agree with him!”

Frisk gripped the cat in their hands tighter, pulling it to their chest, and Toriel chuckled, light and strained.

“Now, that is not true! While I do not agree with him all the time, some of the time he is right—”

A faint rattling noise drew Frisk’s attention and they couldn’t look away from the expression on Papyrus’s face. Papyrus never looked like that. Never looked so—

Scared.

His bones clattered and he took a small step towards Undyne. He mumbled under his breath, and Frisk really wanted to give him a hug.

Frisk wanted a hug.

“A mistake. Undyne’s right—the doctors must have made a mistake. He couldn’t–”

A bleat of laughter interrupted him, and Asriel tore away from Toriel’s grip on his shoulders. He took a step towards Papyrus and tears matted his fur as he laughed harder.

“Don’t be an idiot! We should have known—”

“Asriel!” Toriel snapped.

Papyrus closed his sockets and took a deep breath, but his expression faltered when he looked up and met Frisk’s gaze. His expression twisted into a bright smile even as he pulled Asriel against his side, and Asriel buried his face in Papyrus’s shirt.

No. No, this wasn’t right. Did they think Frisk was some dumb kid? What was going on?!

“Whoopsie doopsie! Sorry about that, Frisk! Don’t mind us. It’s been a very long day! In just this one case, I think everyone could use one of those lazy, eight hour long naps!”

Everyone was acting weird, and it all started with that skeleton. Sans—

“i think that’s called… sleeping.”

Frisk’s vision whited out as pain seared through them, and they let out a whine and dropped their head into their hands. Papyrus was next to them before they could blink.

Frisk was too tired and confused to push it. They had time to figure it out later—preferably when their head hurt less.

“Frisk! Are you hurt? What’s wrong?”

They let out another whine, even as Undyne’s shouts for the doctor got louder.

###

Hours and lots of back and forth with the doctors later, the car ride home was silent. Which was… weird. Everything was weird, and everything made Frisk’s head fuzzy and tender when they thought too much. But thankfully, the pain wasn’t so bad anymore.

But there were… blank spots.

“...I have some music! Do you want to listen to it?”

Papyrus’s voice broke through the silence, and Frisk nodded their head, desperate to make things less empty.

Frisk hummed and waved their arms wildly as Shyren’s song grew louder and faster. The monsters that gathered around them cheered.

Somewhere in the shadows, a short figure sold tickets made out of… toilet paper?

His face was—

“Okay! That’s great! Just some music to play on this very depressing and quiet trip in my less depressing and very cool car!”

Frisk nodded again, and Papyrus pressed play.

“Never gonna give you up, never gonna let you down—”

Papyrus shrieked and jammed the next song button even as Frisk and Toriel laughed. It was nice to see Mom laugh. She always did find it funny when he would play pranks—

…When who would play pranks?

Frisk groaned, and glanced away from Mom and Papyrus’s looks of concern. Instead they turned around to look over the back of Papyrus’s red convertible at the road behind them and tried to ignore the fuzz that filled their head as they squeezed their stuffed cat in their hands.

Pranks…

Frisk leaned back from the telescope and reached up to touch their eye, and when they drew their fingers back, they came away stained with red. They leveled an unimpressed look at someone in a blue jacket, but they couldn’t stop their wide grin. His face was blurry.

“huh? you aren’t satisfied? don’t worry. i’ll give you a full refund.”

He winked—

The car jerked as Papyrus took a too sharp turn. When Frisk glanced back, his grip on the steering wheel was really tight. 

Mom didn’t scold him.

Frisk frowned and signed, “How much longer until we get home? And when will everyone else get there?”

Mom was the one that answered, her voice distracted.

“About 15 more minutes, my child. Alphys and Undyne will be a bit behind since they are stopping at Undyne’s work to pick something up. I don’t believe Asgore will be coming over tonight, and Asriel is going to stay with him.”

Frisk nodded, and the car got quiet again, except for the sound of Papyrus’s loud, shouty music. The last 15 minutes of the trip were just as strained as the rest of it.

Until finally, finally, Papyrus pulled into the driveway of their big, green house.

Mom sighed, something quiet, and reached around to unbuckle Frisk’s seatbelt like they were a little kid. Frisk reached up and caught her paw before she could take it all the way back, and then they stared into her eyes.

Mom cracked a weak smile, something wobbly and uncertain. It was wrong. Today was supposed to be a happy day. Frisk had been so sick for so long… Though, they didn’t remember with what. But they were all better now, weren’t they?

“take care of yourself, kid. ‘cause someone really cares about you.”

“I am okay, Frisk. It will all be okay. …I love you, my child. So very, very much.”

Frisk let go of Mom’s paw, and she pulled away. There was a shuffle as all three of them got out of the car. And then time seemed to pause as Papyrus and Mom stared at each other. Mom took a small step towards the house, but Papyrus cut her off.

“Ms. Toriel. Why don’t you get Frisk comfortable? They have had a very long day, after all, and your cooking is sure to bring a lot of comfort to them! I will… I have something I need to do!”

Mom stared at him, and her eyes were torn in a way that Frisk hadn’t seen since the underground–not since she’d faced off against Frisk and tried to bar them from leaving—but Papyrus didn’t budge.

And then finally, Mom nodded, and before Frisk could react, Papyrus reached over to ruffle their hair and took off, bounding up the stairs and into the house.

Mom’s face was tired when she reached down to smooth Frisk’s hair and hold their hand. Frisk didn’t complain as she led them inside.

Finally, when she brought them to the couch and grabbed blankets from scattered baskets and the backs of chairs, Frisk signed. 

“Something’s going on. What’s going on?”

Mom sighed, and tucked them into a comfy spot on the sofa, making sure Frisk had their new stuffed cat. She gave it a long, sad look, before she leaned down to press a lingering kiss to Frisk’s head. This close, she smelled like butterfly weed and hospital air. 

“I… I do not know what to tell you, my child. It is nothing for you to worry about right now though, okay? Please, focus on resting and healing.”

When Frisk nodded, Mom drew back to the kitchen to make dinner in silence. She didn’t even turn the radio on like usual, and Frisk’s fingers itched to do something. They picked at the fluff on their blanket.

It was quiet. Until it wasn’t. 

“—HOW COULD YOU, SANS?! WHAT THE FUCK WERE YOU THINK—”

Papyrus’s voice shook the whole house, setting Frisk’s teeth on edge. He was angry. …No, Furious. Frisk had never heard him like that.

Before they could say something, or get to their feet to investigate, because something was really wrong, and Frisk needed to go help Papyrus, Mom turned the radio on, and Undyne’s motorcycle pulled into the driveway.

Frisk was going to go upstairs anyway, but Undyne and Alphys nearly broke the door off its hinges when they barreled in.

“FRISK!” Undyne shouted. “You won’t BELIEVE what I found! Look at this!”

She brandished some kind of DVD, and Frisk squinted as they tried to make out the cover through her waving it around in the air. Alphys cut in.

“It’s a limited edition copy of Mew Mew Kissy Cutie! There are extras and cut scenes and really it’s quite amazing that we were able to find it, and I can’t believe our luck since there are only around 100 copies in the world and this one also has autographs on it! AUTOGRAPHS! Can you believe it?…”

Frisk nodded along as Alphys rambled, a grin on their lips, but they sent another look up to the ceiling at the muffled yelling that they could just barely hear. They couldn’t make out any individual words anymore, the noise around them too loud for that.

Undyne dove onto the couch next to Frisk, nearly sending the whole thing topping.

“Well, what are you waiting for Alphys? Put it on!”

Her grin was wide. (Too wide—the same as Alphys’s and Mom’s.)

Frisk shook their head, and pointed up, making sure the stuffed cat on their lap wouldn’t fall off when they signed.

“Papyrus is upset. I’m going to go check on him.”

Before Frisk could climb down the couch, Undyne slung an arm over their shoulder.

“Nah, don’t worry about him! He’s just being extra passionate today! PLUS ULTRA! Come on, you gotta stay down here with me and Alphys! This show won’t watch itself!”

Frisk frowned, but before they could say anything else, the yelling cut off abruptly, and Alphys pushed play on the show.

Frisk hated being confined to the living room. They hated being treated like they were fragile or dumb, but with how upset their family was, Frisk just had to put up with it for a bit longer.

Time passed, and Frisk kept glancing upstairs anxiously as the show played. At some point, Mom finished dinner and quietly handed Frisk a bowl of soup and they all ate in silence. Papyrus still didn’t come down.

Until he did. An hour later, and with a familiar yet not skeleton tucked under his arm and a firm look on his skull. Mom jumped up and tried to interrupt him,

“Papyrus! You really must not—”

Papyrus shook his head and continued on his way.

“Not right now, Ms. Queen Toriel!”

The smaller skeleton—Sans—had sweat beading on his skull, and a wide grin on his face as he looked anywhere but Frisk. Sans hurt Frisk’s head, but they didn’t want to let go of the stuffed cat they still hadn’t released since he’d given it to them.

“let me tell you a story.”

Papyrus plopped Sans right on the couch next to Frisk, and placed a firm hand on his shoulder. Why was he in their house? Was he the reason Papyrus had been yelling?

“papyrus, come on. now’s not the time—”

“Papyrus! I really must disagree with you—”

“What the HELL are you thinking—”

“Ah, I, uh, I don’t think—don’t think—”

Papyrus didn’t let the skeleton talk. He also talked right over Mom, Alphys, and Undyne’s protests.

“Frisk! It occurred to me earlier that I’d never introduced you to my older brother! He… wasn’t around much!”

Papyrus’s gaze darted to the side as sweat beaded on his skull and Frisk bit back a frown at his shifty expression. 

No. That was weird. That was wrong. Frisk should know if Papyrus had an older brother. How could they not know something like that?!

“This is Sans! You’ll have to forgive him if he’s rather lazy. He’s home now because he’s sick. He’s got a rather terrible cough, you see!”

Papyrus dropped a handful of pink petals in a strangely clean wastebasket, and Mom let out a choked sound as the room fell silent.

###

It was when Frisk went to bed that night that the pieces snapped into place.

Oh.

Frisk hiccupped as their tears splashed onto the journal that had been stuffed under their pillow, filled with pictures, and a very thorough note.

Dear me,

It’s gonna be okay. You’ll remember. We just needed some more time, first. But until you remember, here’s what happened…

###

Frisk went downstairs to breakfast the next day with red rimmed eyes and determination lining their spine, and sat right next to Sans. 

“Good morning.”

He didn’t stiffen. The skeleton that Frisk should know, but didn’t, stayed as casual as could be as he stood up from his chair, no tension in his spine.

“good morning, kid. heh, you’ve got good timing, tori made pancakes. just finished my own. i’ll see you around.”

His plate that Frisk could have sworn was still filled with food, was empty. And when Frisk swung back around to look at him, he was gone.

When they tried to knock on his door later, it was locked and no answer came. No matter how hard they tried to find him, they couldn’t.

###

The day after, Frisk tried again, to much the same result. But this time, when Sans tried to run, strong arms clamped onto his shoulders as Papyrus chirped.

“It’s a beautiful day for breakfast with the family, isn’t is, Sans? Come on, sit with us for a while longer before you go off to boondoggle somewhere else!”

“hey, take it easy. i’ve gotten a ton of work done today. a skele-ton.”

Frisk blinked away the brush of memory that made their head ache and gripped their plate. They turned to Sans.

“What do you do when you’re not boondoggling?”

Sans cracked a grin, though he didn’t meet their eye.

“aw, didn’t ya know kid? i’m always boondoggling. just ask that skeleton over there. speaking of, hey, papyrus, what are you up to?”

Despite not being able to leave the table, Sans never met Frisk’s eye as he dodged their questions. And as soon as everyone was looking somewhere else he slipped away.

That was okay—he couldn’t run away forever.

After all, some of Frisk’s memories had trickled in, and they were determined to get the rest. They refused to let things slip from their fingers again. 

###

Sans

###

The days and weeks after Frisk’s surgery passed in a blur, and Sans couldn’t remember much. Wasn’t sure he wanted too, or that he deserved too. 

It had all been his fault. It was his fault, and stars knew Papyrus was right to have yelled at him. 

Sans wished everyone would stop trying to make it all better by forcing him and Frisk together. He just didn’t have the energy or the want to fix it. If Frisk didn’t remember, well… it was his fault in the first place. 

Sans slept a lot, despite Papyrus’s nagging and the way he kept shoving Frisk and Sans in a room together. Speaking of… 

A small presence crept into the living room where Sans lay on the couch with a magazine shoved over his head. He really shouldn’t have been out here, but Papyrus had filled his room with alarm clocks and spilled a bottle of perfume by “accident” that would take all day to clear out, and even Sans wasn’t able to sleep in the same room as that.

But he would try, because there was no way in hell he was staying out here—

Before Sans could shortcut away, a slight weight threw itself on Sans’s legs, pinning him to the couch, and Sans couldn’t leave unless he wanted to take the interloper with him.

He chucked, and ignored how tense it sounded.

“whatcha up to, kiddo? that can’t be comfortable. i’m pretty, heh. boney.”

Frisk waited until he pulled the magazine from his head so he could see them, and they fiddled with the stuffed cat he’d gotten them before they signed.

“If I move, you’re not allowed to leave.”

Well… shit. He’d hoped they hadn’t picked up on that. Or that they wouldn't have any complaints if they did notice, considering the splitting headache he gave them.

“aw man, i’m not that easy to see through, am i?”

Frisk narrowed their eyes before they smiled.

“I mean, you are a skeleton after all.”

He laughed and Frisk slid off his legs so he could sit up. But they didn’t go far, and when he was situated, they immediately latched onto this arm. That’s when Sans noticed the other thing in their lap, and his soul seized. Shit.

“...whatcha got there, kiddo?”

Sans didn’t need them to answer. The image on the front of the album of Sans buried in sand as Frisk merrily filled up a pit on the beach was answer enough.

“If I answer, you aren’t allowed to leave. We’re talking and if you try to go, I’m telling Papyrus.”

Sans could barely breathe, but he wheezed out a laugh anyway.

“heh, why would i try to leave?”

Frisk glared up at him, their red eyes bright.

“Because you always avoid me, and you have since the moment we surfaced, you big jerk. This isn’t anything new.”

The moment we surfaced—

Something in Sans’s chest tightened and loosened in equal measures as he shoved his hands in his pockets and looked away from Frisk’s eyes. Relief? Horror? Fear? Guilt? Sans didn’t know.

“...ah. yeah, that’s, uh. well, i’m too bone-tired to go anywhere, anyway.”

Frisk gave Sans a long look that tore into his chest. And then they looked away and stared at the cover of the album for several long moments. 

“If there is one thing I’ve always known, with absolute certainty, down to my bones, it’s that you hate me. No matter what I did or said—”

Sans choked, but Frisk didn’t stop.

“You want me dead.”

“frisk, i swear, that’s not true—”

Frisk whirled around and glared at him.

“No! You’re listening to me now. What else was I supposed to think?! You told me you wanted me dead over and over! You wouldn’t listen or help me when I asked for it! I never wanted those powers, and I never wanted to DIE because of them, but I did! And you told me it was my job to keep dying to save everyone! You said if I had a special power it was my job to use it to save everyone! Well, I did!”

Sans stilled, his phalanges twisting in his sweater as he opened and closed his mouth wordlessly. Frisk barreled on.

“Even when I thought we were friends, you’d still tell me that you would have killed me if it wasn't for mom! And even after we surfaced for the last time, you always ignored me! When we did hangout or have fun, I could never forget that you were forced to put up with the anomaly you hated because Papyrus and Mom love me.”

Sans’s chest seized, and there was an itch in the back of his mouth that he shoved down, flowers clawing their way out of him. Because Frisk wasn’t wrong. He never realized just how much he loved them until he lost them, like the fool he was. He'd never thought about the impact of his own words. He hadn’t known—he’d been an idiot.

When Frisk signed next, the blaze in their eyes sputtered out, and they looked away from Sans, their shoulders hunched up.

“You are the biggest jerk in the world. I should hate you for what you put me through, just like you hated me.”

The itch in Sans’s throat got stronger and his chest twisted and yanked as he coughed. His sockets watered as a pink bloom forced its way out of his mouth. He caught it in his hand and stared dully at it.

“you really should hate me. heh, not much to love, is there?”

A surprisingly strong hand wrapped around his wrist, some of the frailness that had destroyed Frisk’s body for over a year having recovered with the removal of the hanahaki. Their small fingers pried the flower out of his own hand and they placed it in their lap.

“There’s plenty to love, when you aren’t being a buttface. You're funny, and nice, and you always take care of the people around you. ...And I was also a stupid buttface. I never talked to you because I didn’t think there was ever a question. I didn’t doubt how much you hated me. I didn’t think there was anything to do other than prepare to die. But…”

Frisk trailed their fingers over the petals reverently, tears pricking their eyes. And then they turned back to face Sans, their face red with emotion as Sans swallowed thickly.

“But you love me, don’t you?”

Sans hissed out a breath, and slammed his sockets shut. And then he spoke the words he should have months ago.

“i love you so, so much, frisk.”

Frisk stilled, and despite their words and bravado, Sans hadn’t even noticed the terror in their eyes until it was replaced with tears as they pursed their lips and a high pitched whine slid out of them despite their best efforts.

God, they were so young. They always put the world on their shoulders, and Sans—

Sans had always put the world on their shoulders, too.

“i’m so sorry, frisk. none of this was ever fair to you. i’ve always put everything on your shoulders. heh. even now, you were the one that tracked me down to have this conversation. kid, this shouldn’t have been your responsibility, and i’m so, so sorry that i didn’t step up.”

Sans put the responsibility of being the adult on Frisk, and what in the ever-loving-fuck was wrong with him?

Sans was done fucking up.

Tears slid down Frisk’s face as they tensed up and tried to bite down a sob, because they were a kid—they were just a kid that almost died, permanently, because of Sans—and Sans threw caution to the wind.

He yanked them into his arms, burying his skull in their hair, and they grabbed fistfuls of his jacket as their cries finally broke through.

…Had they ever cried once while they were dying? Or had they just spent the entire time comforting everyone else?

“i love you so much, frisk, and i’m a big ol’ numbskull that doesn’t know how to confront things properly. you’ve been so brave and so strong, and you shouldn’ta had to be. it’s okay. i’ve got you now.”

Frisk’s voice tore out of their throat as they clutched tighter to him.

“I love you, too, you stupid butt.”

Sans hummed and rocked Frisk back and forth as tears stung his own sockets, and the pain that had taken hold in his chest for the past several weeks unraveled. No itch pushed at the back of his throat, and no petals filled his mouth.

“yeah. i’m a big doodoo head. but frisk? i promise i won’t let anything like this happen again.”

There was a watery sniffle across the room, and Sans looked up in time to see Papyrus shoot him a wobbly thumbs up as tears poured from his sockets. Papyrus mouthed something with exaggerated motions before he disappeared back upstairs.

“I’m proud of you.”

Sans let out a hiccuping laugh and hugged Frisk even tighter to his chest.

“kiddo? no matter what, i love you. it shouldn't have taken me so long to realize it, but now you're never getting rid of me. i'll be a skeleton shaped barnacle.”

Sans's shoulder got soaked from where Frisk pressed their face against him as they let out another sob.

"Good, 'cuz you're never getting rid of me, either."