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“Hi. I don’t want to be alone. Do you?”
“I haven't been wanting to be alone most nights.”
Keyleth steps aside, letting Vax’ildan pass. The half-elf rogue smoothly walks inside the druid’s room. If he is nervous about showing up at her door at such a late hour, he sure is not letting it show. Keyleth’s eyes remain on Vax as she slowly shuts the door with her hand behind her, careful not to make a sound to even chance at awakening the rest of the castle. The rogue looks around, slowly, his dark eyes scanning the room from the made bed, to the myriad of various plants in pots, to the books scattered around, to the fireplace roaring softly. The druid steps closer, carefully keeping a space between them. She regards the preoccupied Vax’ildan’s lean figure, his wide shoulders, his height. His wired muscles pressing against the fabric of his thin night clothes. His long, dark-brown hair, still half-tied but slightly dishevelled after the events of the day. His edged ears, longer than human, shorter than elven. Much like her own.
“Were you going to bed? Did I interrupt you?” Vax’ildan turns around to face Keyleth, startling her away from her thoughts.
“No, I… I was just… sitting. Thinking.” Keyleth’s arms find each other, crossing against her chest. She suddenly feels quite self-conscious. When was the last time they’d been alone? Just her and Vax? Was it at the Sun Tree…?
“It sure has been an eventful day.” Vax’ildan’s voice is low. Tired, but not restless. His brows are deeply furrowed. Gods, he is so beautiful.
“It… has.” Before waiting for a response from the rogue, Keyleth closes the space between them, wrapping her hands around shoulders, pressing her face to the crook of his neck.
“I am tired Vax’ildan,” Keyleth mutters, the words muffled against Vax’s skin. The druid feels the rogue’s hand slowly settle onto her back, returning the hug. Warm tears escape Keyleth’s eyes. It’s embarrassing, really, but the surprise of her own actions causes her to not really know how to care, to not fall into the awkwardness that usually is so typical for her.
“I am too.” The response causes her to think further of their situation. The hopelessness. The constant close brushes with death. The futility of protection attempts on each other, the certainty of sacrifices. Suddenly, air is hard to gather into her lungs. Sobs wrack her core.
She’s not sure how long she sobs, and how long he simply holds her. Close, safe, in his arms. Finally, he speaks, and Keyleth has to rouse herself away from the make-shift safety of his hold to properly hear him. “Hey,” she hears. Keyleth pulls away a little, lifts her head to look Vax in his eyes. They’re a bit glassy too. “Hey,” she replies, her voice raspy and breathless.
“I know it seems futile, to say it now of all times but… we’re gonna be okay.” His hands have travelled from her back to her face, gently cupping her cheeks. He’s trying to be so brave, so comforting. For me, Keyleth thinks. Oh, Vax’ildan. He is brave. He is comforting. Beautiful, kind, loving Vax’ildan. Who said he is in love with me… As the thought forms in Keyleth’s head, she suddenly knows exactly what she wants to do. In a split-second of courage and determination, the red-haired druid leans forward, her lips pressing softly onto Vax's.
He's taken aback, at first. But as Keyleth’s hands travel from around his shoulders up around his neck, pressing herself closer, he seems to awaken, choosing to respond, melting into Keyleth's touch. Vax pulls her closer, closer than should be possible. He deepens the kiss, like he needs more of her… like he cannot have enough of her. Like he worships her, and she is a rare relic he is grateful to hold. Keyleth feels a burn in her stomach, a desire to have him as her own. Not the realm’s, or the Raven Queen’s. Just hers. To touch, to kiss, to hold… She sinks her fingers into his hair, gently pulling. Teasing, almost. He grunts against her, his mouth still against hers. Keyleth smiles, a smile that reaches her closed eyes, quirking upwards. She feels so light. It’s thrilling. She presses her hips to him, shifting her position. His breath is hot in hers, his lips soft, his nose pressed against hers. It feels so natural. Keyleth doesn’t even properly remember the sensation of their first kiss, riddled as it was with blood loss and battle thrill. It was short, hard-pressed. But this one’s slow, yearning… hungry. He tastes like the wine they had for dinner, the syrup in their soup and the ash constantly trailing his armour. She wants him whole, all for herself, to keep and to hold always and forever. If only...
Her brain suddenly feels heavy, like her head cannot hold its own weight. She pulls away, Vax echoing her action. Air feels so refreshing, like it had been a secondary element to their kiss, sucked in only occasionally. Keyleth’s breathing is hard, her heart beating fast. She presses her forehead against his. “I need…” Keyleth’s voice trails off. She can’t seem to form a simple thought. The weight from her head travels lightning speed to her legs, and in a second she cannot hold herself up anymore. The druid sinks against the rogue, who despite his surprise and widening eyes, catches her with ease, and helps her sit down on the thick woollen carpet.
“You…okay? Was it too much?” the rogue asks, worry evident in his low voice. He gently strokes Keyleth’s hair, pushing stray strands of fire-red away from her flushed face.
“No it… was wonderful,” Keyleth manages. She’s thrilled, truly, and though the action causes her mind to swirl dangerously, she looks up at Vax and smiles. “You’re wonderful.”
Is that… a blush on the brave, noble, serious Vax’ildan’s face?
Keyleth can’t help but chuckle. “You know, I would love to stay and chat, but given the circumstance—” she gestures towards them on the floor, “—we better head for bed.”
Vax raises an eyebrow, and Keyleth realizes the dual meaning of her words. “I mean— you know— bed bed, like, sleep bed. Not the other—”
It’s the rogue’s turn to chuckle, a teasing smirk forming on his face. “No, I know, I know. I’m just surprised you’re still up for company tonight… at all.”
“Why wouldn’t I be?”
He takes a moment to answer. “If it’s not too much, too fast?”
Keyleth studies him. Vax’ildan, too considerate sometimes for his own good. He looks like he’s going to say something else, so she kisses him. To shut him up. Just in case. The kiss is shorter, but deep and caring still. Keyleth almost doesn't want to pull back, but as she does, she can see Vax’ildan impossibly flushed, up to his half-elven ear tips.
“I’m in love with you too. You know that, right?” The thrill of the words causes her fingers to tingle. Her heart flutters with excitement. She said it. Keyleth, the druid who struggles with saying the things she means to. Keyleth, who stammers and blabbers away everything. Impossibly clumsy and shy Keyleth said what she has known for so long, smoothly and meaningfully. She suddenly feels a hundred times braver, more confident, more knowing. Everything else in their lives has always been so unsure, fluctuated by change and new challenges. But this… it makes sense, as she forms the thought in her head. She was so afraid of loving him back. Even acknowledging the idea of being with someone. The conversation with Vex however… Keyleth really shouldn’t let Vax get away. She can’t. It’s worth taking the risk. He’s worth the risk. And more than she has ever been sure of anything, Keyleth is sure she loves Vax. And he loves her. Impossibly. Timelessly.
The moonlight gently scatters around the room. Keyleth feels Vax’s deep breaths of sleep by her neck. His arm is curled around her, as she is positioned as the little spoon, his lean body surrounding hers. She feels almost childish, as giddy as she is. She’s proud of herself, of her moment of unabashed truthfulness. As the heavy weight of sleep finally reaches the flutter of Keyleth’s mind, her last thought of consciousness is of Vax’ildan. The feel of him as they hold each other. His smile. His quips and jokes. His words of encouragement to the ever-messing-things-up Keyleth. He feels like home. He is so beautiful, inside and out, and Keyleth is so very much in love with him.