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'Why does time have to go so slow..?'
Akito couldn't stand the thought of waiting any longer, sitting in the middle of an empty classroom as he waited for a certain blond to arrive.
It was half an hour before school ended and Tsukasa could arrive any minute. Akito almost never gets nervous, yet at this moment he was more nervous than any time he's had to sing on stage. He even skipped half a class to get here earlier, what's gotten into him?
It was a week earlier, and the redhead had his head layed against his desk in defeat. He had just received the news that he was going to need a tutor; his grades in math weren't doing so good due to him sleeping through all of the lessons.
'How would calculus be necessary in surpassing Rad Weekend?' he wanted to say, but he stayed quiet and accepted the fact that from then on, he'd need a tutor every day after school. At least it couldn't get worse than that, right?
Far from right actually. Just 2 days later, his first tutoring session began and not only was it someone from the same school, it was none other than Tsukasa Tenma. The loud, weird and egocentric blond who's always getting in trouble, was his math tutor. So maybe things could have been worse, just his luck. He probably jinxed it.
The first session wasn't really that bad, anyone with a different point of view could say that.
Not Akito though. Maybe the world was just against him that day, because he realized that maybe, maybe Tsukasa wasn't actually that bad. He was actually a very nice guy, and it was clear why Toya looked up to him so much. It was surprising, seeing how the blond would actually make Akito laugh once in a while, and how the boy was actually looking up to these tutoring sessions just to see him, especially his smile.
Had he gone crazy? He thought so. Akito really did think these gay unusual thoughts would go away after maybe a day or two, but after more than a week? Akito was doomed.
So here he was now, looking at the wall and pretending like he wasn't daydreaming about being with Tsukasa again. Just thinking about it made a light blush cover his face, which he quickly realized, causing him to rub it away as soon as he noticed.
'Damnit Tsukasa, what did you do to me...' was all he could think, watching the clock tick, anxiously. It wasn't like the blond was late, he'd never, Akito was just 20 minutes early.
Yeah, the singer is pretty sure he's gone insane.
He slowly came to realize that these feelings weren't platonic a while ago, they were much more than that. He'd never admit it out loud though.
He likes to think that maybe if he blamed Tsukasa himself, it'd make him feel a bit better. It was almost working. Almost.
He liked to imagine that maybe Tsukasa put an evil love spell on him with the help of his weird friend Kamishiro, and that the effects would eventually fade away. Or maybe he found a way to hack his thoughts with some kind of robot? Again, probably with the help of Kamishiro.
But Akito wasn't dumb. He knew these were just dumb thoughts he forces himself to have just to be able to sleep. There'd be no way he would be able to get a good night's rest while having... those thoughts about his upperclassman. Like as if his sleep schedule wasn't a mess already.
The sound of a door opening finally pulled the redhead out of his trance, a small smile already forming on his face due to habit. 'What's wrong with me' , he thought, shuddering in embarrasement. He regained his composure and waited for Tsukasa to notice him. 'He looks so-'
"Ah- Akito! You're early!"
Wow, he didn't even get the chance to finish that thought. The blond smiled his usual bright smile at him as he took a seat beside him. 'Has he somehow gotten prettier?' Maybe that's a weird thing to think about a guy, but it's true. Not in a gay way though.
"As expected of my dear junior! It makes me so happy to see you just as excited as me!"
Wait, he could tell? Did he feel the same? Before Akito could come up with some lame excuse, Tsukasa spoke again.
"You actually care about your grades now! Getting here early again, it almost makes me emotional.." oh.
Tsukasa wiped a fake tear as he turned to face his junior, but all Akito could do was think about how lucky he would be if he ever got to hold that hand.
"Yeah right, can we get done with this already?" He sighed and opened his notebook, but it was almost as if his upperclassman could read his mind.
"How rude! Rushing the world-future star already!"
Tsukasa smiled softly when he saw Akito laugh, even if his tone said otherwise. If Akito wanted to play that game then so would he.
"How about this, if you pass your next exam I'll.. treat you some cheesecake!"
Akito almost rolled his eyes at this, laughing at the blond's dumb attempt of motivation.
.. it was working.
"I'm serious! I'll gladly treat a dear friend some cheesecake after-school, but only if you pass, okay?"
'Friend', Akito liked that. He would never admit it, but Tsukasa might just have been one of the best things to happen to him. It felt nice, being comfortable with someone who's just as comfortable with you.
"So like a date?"
Maybe too comfortable.
Crap. Akito's eyes widened when he realized what he had just said, and Tsukasa wasn't any better. A really akward silence fell between the two, and all they could do was stare at each other while they waited for one to speak up. The blond's ears went bright red as Akito opened his mouth to say something, but no sound came out.
".. I mean it was just a joke, don't think too much of it." Akito laughed it off and turned to his notebook to continue 'studying', but Tsukasa held his wrist, catching Akito in surprise.
"Was it really?"
"What?"
The redhead struggled to come up with anything to say, the change in Tsukasa's tone was not like him at all. Weren't they supposed to be studying right now? He probably would've bought that excuse if it weren't for the fact his red face gave it away.
Truth is, Akito did want that. It was a dumb thought, but he really did want to go on a date with Tsukasa; he wanted to hold his hand during it and kiss the faint freckles on his face you could only see up close. He wanted to be Tsukasa's boyfriend, but now it seemed it would never happen, all because of a dumb joke.
The lesson was just about to end, how long had this been going on for? Akito was too busy thinking he ruined everything he didn't even notice Tsukasa was already giving up hope.
Tsukasa was completely frozen as he kept thinking over his options. Whatever he said next could determine wether or not his friendship with his junior would end.
"I want to know if it really was! You said it so fast and- well it's okay if it was just a joke but, what if it wasn't? What if I did want to take you on a date?"
Tsukasa was rarely this bold, even he was wondering where this new confidence had come from.
The room was silent. The only thing breaking that silence was the ticking of the clock, indicating their studying session of the day would come to an end soon.
Tsukasa could only stare heartbroken, noticing Akito refused to look at him.
Maybe.. he should've taken more time to consider those options.
Whether his reaction was positive or not was hard to tell. It was raining now, and all Akito could do was stare at the floor. Every possible answer had died on his tongue, he was speechless.
There was no way Tsukasa reciprocated his feelings. He knew his upperclassman was a very nice guy, that's why he even fell for him in the first place!
But, what if he was pretending to accept just because he felt bad for him? Was Tsukasa the type of person to do that? Even if his feelings were genuine, would Akito be a good boyfriend to begin with? Would he be good enough for him? It was hard for him to admit but,
Akito was scared.
Everything was a blur, the only thing reminding him he was still there was the rain that began pouring outside.
Loud thunder pulled both boys out of their trance, and Tsukasa decided it was enough.
"I- I'm sorry, I um.. I'll see you tomorrow for our next lesson, Akito."
He stood up and rushed to exit the classroom, a small sniff escaping him. It seemed that was what finally caused Akito to react, but by the time he did it was too late, Tsukasa was already running out of the classroom.
'Akito, you idiot!', the singer thought, quickly following behind."Tsukasa wait!"
He stopped by his locker to grab and umbrella since neither one of the two had one, and chased after Tsukasa.
A door opening and closing shut was all that could be heard as the blond escaped the building, the rain drowning out the sounds of his cries.
No. No, Nononono!
Akito ran as fast as he could, getting both his clothes and hair soaking wet.
He didn't care, all he could really think about though was catching to Tsukasa.
"Tsukasa! Please wait-!"
This wasnt supposed to happen! He didn't want to do this again; he won't do this again! It was just like in middle school, and the upperclassman does not want to go through another rejection like this.
Especially not from someone he cares for so deeply.
A hand to his shoulder shook him out of his trance, making him face who he last wanted to see at the moment. Both teens were standing in the middle of a sidewalk, their clothes damp from the rain.
Tsukasa waited for something, anything, but all he was confronted with was a flustered Akito shoving an open umbrella into his hand.
".. you forgot an umbrella."
Wow, that was really stupid. Akito would normally curse at himself for that but he had a way more important task at hand.
" .. thanks."
"Yeah it's nothing- isn't this the wrong way to your house?"
"Ah well, I wasn't really paying attention to where I was going.."
"Oh, right."
The tension was thick and akward, and it was now Tsukasa's turn to face the floor.
Wow, even damp under the rain and crying he still looked beautiful.
Wait, crying?
"Tsukasa? Were you crying?"
Tsukasa finally looked at the boy in front of him, he noticed?!
"Ah no- well, maybe? Okay, yeah I was but I didn't mean to! I'm sorry for running away, I guess what happened back there just shook me up a bit aha and well it was really just a dumb mistake, I didn't mean any of it! Can we please just go back to how we- Akito-?"
He hadn't even finished talking but Akito already had wrapped both arms around him, laying the blond's head against the crook of his neck.
The boy had no intentions of letting go and only held on tighter when Tsukasa tried to break free, and that was it for him. The blond didn't react for the first seconds, but then wrapped his own arms around Akito just as fast.
Tsukasa couldn't bother worrying about any unrequited feelings anymore, the warmth of Akito's hug was enough to calm him down.
Neither one knew how much time had passed, but it had already stopped raining when they let go. Even though the hug was more than enough to make Tsukasa feel better, he still couldn't help but feel he had lost a dear friend.
That was until he felt a pair of warm hands hold his.
The upperclassman looked up to see what Akito's intentions were, and was met with a very flustered Akito dealing with his own thoughts.
"Tsukasa?"
"Akito..?"
".. I want to go out with you."
There was an akward silence, for a while.
Tsukasa was beyond confused, and Akito was starting to regret his choices. The singer sighed, 'at least I tried-
"Ow! What the-"
"You dummy! Why didn't you say so earlier!"
Tsukasa lightly punched the redhead in the arm, and was tearing up again? The singer truly couldn't tell if they were happy tears or not, so he rubbed his arm and tried again.
"Well I'm sorry! So.. is that a yes?"
Tsukasa only sighed and looked at the floor, almost as if the roles were reversed.
'Dang it, I really didn't want to do this..', Akito thought, but decided to go with it anyway. He grabbed the blond's hands and held them in front of him, catching him in surprise.
".. The reason I didn't say anything was because I was scared.
I'm scared I won't turn out to be what you want me to be."
Akito let go of the breath he didn't know he was holding, and the other boy looked at him in shock. Who would've guessed sharing your feelings would be so hard..
A few minutes passed, and if things couldn't get any weirder, Tsukasa started to laugh. It started as a quiet soft one, which quickly turned to a fit of laughter.
Although Akito was still confused, he couldn't help it and laughed along when he saw the boy he liked laugh so happy.
Tsukasa was still laughing and he rested his head against Akito's shoulder, holding onto his jacket.
"Akito, if that were true, I wouldn't have fallen for you in the first place!"
Tsukasa raised his head to look at the boy in front of him, smiling with pure joy.
Akito smiled back.
The reassurance was nice, but Akito still had his doubts. He wasn't too new at romance, but what he felt for Tsukasa was different. He would never want to hurt Tsukasa, not even on accident.
Tsukasa noticed this and grabbed his hand, giving it a nice squeeze. He smiled, Akito smiled back.
Maybe he'd be okay. As long as Tsukasa was with him, he'd be okay.
It had been 2 weeks since that day in the rain, and inside a café we're Tsukasa and Akito.
The smell of sweets was intoxicating, and the light jazz drowned out the sounds of the couple.
It was perfect.
"Say ahh"
"I can feed myself you know..
"Aw come on, just this once!"
"... fine."
Akito was too busy admiring his boyfriend to really care about anything else. He grabbed a spoonful of chocolate cake.
"Your turn."
Tsukasa's face turned a light hue of red as he opened his mouth.
"You got a little something here.."
Tsukasa noticed and struggled to wipe the chocolate frosting of his face. Akito could only watch as he only managed to smear it more onto his face.
He was so in love with him.