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“Is that my sweatshirt?” Kageyama squinted, leaning in closer to the screen and the slightly pixelated Hinata that grinned at him there.
“It’s warm!” Hinata defended, pulling the sleeves up nearly over his hands and propping his cheeks on the fabric. “Plus it smells like you.” He mumbled. “You’ve been gone for so long already I almost forgot what you smell like.”
Kageyama snorted. “Dumbass.” He said softly, actually grateful for the poor connection if it meant Hinata wouldn’t notice the flush on his cheeks. “I’ve only been gone for two weeks.”
“Two weeks too long.” Hinata pouted, pausing to lift the cat onto his lap. “Look who it is, Pumpkin!” The orange cat glanced at the screen for a few moments with a slow blink before curling in Hinata’s lap, uninterested. “She misses you too.” Hinata assured, running his hand down the cat’s back as the low rumbling of her purring just reached Kageyama’s ears. “But you’ll be home by the end of the week, right? In time for Christmas?”
Kageyama grimaced at that, and Hinata frowned. “Well…” He really had been meaning to tell Hinata, but the right moment hadn’t presented itself. “It – it doesn’t look like it.” He admitted, watching helplessly as Hinata groaned, crossing his arms on the table and dropping his head onto them. “We’re doing better than we thought, so we’re in a higher bracket, which means… I’ll probably be here for another week.” Much as he loved playing volleyball, he hated the thought of being away over Christmas as much as Hinata did.
“Next year I’ll be there with you!” Hinata vowed, unable to disguise the hitch in his voice. Kageyama had no doubts that was true. Hinata had been working harder in the past year than he’d ever seen him work before, and he’d just barely missed making the National team at the last tryout.
“Of course you will. Coach even said it was a good possibility.” Hinata brightened a fraction at that, but there was still a suspicious glimmer in his eyes. “Don’t cry.” Kageyama pleaded, heart already sinking.
“I’m not crying.” Hinata denied stubbornly, scrubbing his face with the sleeves of Kageyama’s sweatshirt anyway. “You’ll Skype me on Christmas?”
Kageyama nodded. “Definitely. It won’t be the same, but we can still celebrate together.” Hinata nodded, blinking quickly until his eyes were dry. They fell into a comfortable silence for a few moments, Kageyama taking in the slice of the familiar kitchen behind Hinata. He’d strung a green garland and twinkling lights above the cupboards, and the warm glow they cast made Hinata’s expression look especially soft.
“Is it snowing there?” Hinata finally asked, a familiar fake brightness edging his tone.
Kageyama glanced out the hotel room window at the clear, frozen sky and then down to the street below and the scattered pedestrians who pulled their coats closer around their bodies against the cold. “No.” He turned back to the screen with a shake of his head, and watched as Hinata turned his laptop until the kitchen window came into view. He could just make out the softly falling flakes beyond it.
“It is here.” Hinata said unnecessarily, turning the computer back towards himself. “It’s sort of pretty. Makes the city look softer, somehow. And quieter.” Soft and quiet were normally the last two adjectives Kageyama would use to describe Tokyo, but he missed it all the same: it and the warm apartment with the Christmas decorations Hinata had insisted on putting up a week before December had even begun, and most especially the smile that wasn’t quite the same hundreds of miles away.
“Sounds nice.” He murmured, wishing for probably the hundredth time that trip that he could reach through the computer screen and pull Hinata close to his chest. During the day when he had practice and matches and his teammates to distract him the missing wasn’t quite as acute, but in the evenings when he sat cross-legged on an unfamiliar bed in a too-quiet hotel room it hit him full force. “I miss you.” Speaking so candidly had taken years of practice, and it never did come quite as easily with anyone else as it did with Hinata, but now there were times he feared that he spoke too freely.
“I miss you too.” Hinata sighed, propping his cheeks on his palms once more. “But I’ll see you in a little more than a week. Right?”
Kageyama nodded. “Yeah, for sure. I’m sorry.” He wasn’t sure why he felt the need to apologize.
“Don’t be.” Hinata insisted firmly. “I’m really glad that you get to be there with the team, really. It just means we’re both one step closer to the top, right? And I’ll be there with you soon too. Just you wait.” Kageyama nodded, not trusting his voice. “And… I should probably get to bed now. I work early tomorrow.” He sighed reluctantly before mustering a smile. “Night, Tobio. I love you.”
“I love you too.” Kageyama let his eyes wander the face on the screen, drinking in the details even though they weren’t as sharp as they’d be if Hinata were right in front of him. “Goodnight, Shouyou.” Hinata blew him a kiss right before hanging up, and for a few moments Kageyama sat staring at the ended call. No matter how often he had to say goodbye, no matter whether it was in an airport with Hinata clinging to him until the last possible second or over a blurry Skype call, it never got any easier.
As he puttered around the room, brushing his teeth and preparing his uniform for the next day, he couldn’t help feeling crushed by his own disappointment and the look on Hinata’s face that he had tried so hard to disguise. As he crawled into the unfamiliar bed and pulled the quilt up to his chin, curling into himself with the absence of a warm body against his chest, his mind was whirring farther from sleep with every passing moment. He knew how much Hinata had been looking forward to this first Christmas together in their apartment, and he made a silent vow to himself that he’d find a way to give Hinata the holiday he deserved.
* * *
The week passed by in a whirl of activity for Hinata, but at the center of it was a dull ache that wouldn’t quite go away. Knowing that Kageyama wouldn’t even be home for Christmas had sucked most of the joy out of his favorite holiday. When they Skyped he insisted that he was happy that Kageyama could have this opportunity (and he was, truly) but in the moments after Kageyama’s I-love-you faded along with his face, Hinata allowed himself to curl up into the jealousy and the missing and the disappointment. Even being sad wasn’t quite the same without Kageyama there to press kisses to the top of his head through his hair and murmur that things would get better.
On Christmas Eve he very nearly cried in the break room at work when he read Kageyama’s text that he wouldn’t be able to Skype him that night.
But you will tomorrow, right?
He’d responded quickly, almost desperately. Kageyama had promised, after all.
Of course, dumbass
He allowed himself to relax at that, smiling down at his phone screen as he practically heard the familiar words. He even found it in himself to smile brightly at his co-workers, wishing them a chipper “Merry Christmas!” As he left for the day, trying his best not to think about the empty apartment that awaited him.
“Hi, Pumpkin.” He said softly as the cat wound her way around his legs the moment he stepped inside. “It’s just going to be you and me tomorrow. Some first Christmas in the apartment, huh?” The cat looked up at him and let out a small mew before slinking off. “Well it’s still Christmas even if Tobio isn’t here!” Hinata said a bit more loudly into the empty apartment as he began heating milk to make himself a mug of hot cocoa. With no Skype session to look forward to, nothing sounded better than curling up in bed. Pulling the comforter around his shoulders and sinking lower into Kageyama’s sweatshirt, he settled into bed with his drink and a queue of Christmas movies on Netflix.
It wasn’t long before the exhaustion of the day got the better of him. “We don’t need Tobio anyway, do we?” He murmured sleepily to the cat curled against him, drawing in the scent that still lingered on the sweatshirt he wore as his eyes slipped closed.
He woke bleary eyed and disoriented at what turned out to be 4:12 in the morning, startled awake by a sound he couldn’t quite place. Groaning to himself, he surmised that the cat had most likely knocked the tiny tree over for the fourth time that week. Deciding to fix it in the morning, he rolled over and had just about drifted back to sleep when a sound came again. This time it sounded suspiciously like the front door opening and closing. Ignoring the fear that clenched at his middle he slipped out of bed, glancing around for anything that could be used as a weapon. He finally settled for one of their college tournament trophies, gripping its base as he snuck out to the living room, peering into the darkness until he saw a figure move from the doorway. Stomach leaping to his throat, he tightened his grip on the trophy and leapt into the room, swinging away as he flicked the light on.
“Good Lord, Shouyou!” At the voice he came to an abrupt stop. “That’s sure a nice way to greet someone who just flew eight hours to surprise you on Christmas.”
“Tobio?” The trophy fell from his fingers with a soft thud, forgotten. A sheepish Kageyama stood in their living room, suitcase at his side as a smile worked its way across his face. “Tobio!” With that Hinata leapt into his waiting arms, ignoring the soft oof he emitted as the air was knocked from Kageyama’s lungs when Hianta wrapped himself around him. “You’re here?” He murmured in disbelief, muffled into the fabric of Kageyama’s jacket.
“I’m here.” He confirmed softly, arms tightening around Hinata as he regained his balance, shifting to support his weight more comfortably. For a few moments Hinata was content to breathe deeply, drawing in the familiar scent as he debated the probability that this was just a dream he’d wake up from in a few moments.
“What’re you doing here?” He finally demanded accusingly, pulling back but still gripping onto Kageyama in case he disappeared. “You’re supposed to be with the team…”
“I wasn’t going to play in today’s match anyway.” Kageyama shrugged, smile tugging at the corners of his lips. “Coach said so. It took some convincing, but he let me come back home as long as I promised to fly back out tonight.” Still struggling past his disbelief, Hinata worked his arms around Kageyama’s neck, slipping his fingers into the hair at his nape. “So Merry Christmas, Shouyou.”
“Merry Christmas, Tobio.” Even Hinata could hear the hitch in his voice, but he was determined not to cry. Not when Kageyama was actually right here in front of him. Instead, he pulled Kageyama’s face down just close enough so that he could crash their lips together, unable to keep from smiling into the sloppy kiss as Kageyama drew him closer.
“I missed you so much.” Kageyama murmured against his lips, hand coming to rest on his cheek as his thumb gently brushed at the stubborn tear that had leaked out despite Hinata’s efforts.
“I still can’t believe you’re here…” Hinata stepped back just long enough for Kageyama to shrug out of his jacket, and for the first time he noticed the bags beneath his eyes. “You flew all night to get here?” He asked softly, and Kageyama nodded sheepishly, stifling a yawn behind his palm before blinking down at Hinata with a soft, sleepy smile spreading across his face. “You’re nuts.” He whispered, grinning as he slipped his hand into Kageyama’s.
“Christmas wouldn’t be the same without my favorite dumbass.” Kageyama murmured, giving Hinata’s hair a more or less affectionate ruffle.
“Well, this dumbass wants to spend the first part of Christmas in bed.” Hinata decided, feeling the drowsiness return as the shock of Kageyama’s return softened to a pleasant warmth in his middle. “C’mon.” He gently tugged on Kageyama’s hand, shuffling back to the bedroom with a smile still plastered across his face. He crawled back into bed perfectly content, curling against Kageyama’s chest as his arms tightened around him. “Now it’s Christmas.” He murmured as he wormed his way closer, nose to nose with Kageyama and leaning in to press a kiss to his lips as the comfortable warmth lulled him back to sleep. Right as he drifted off he couldn’t help thinking that this might be his favorite Christmas yet.