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What if he failed?
Isn’t the answer clear already? Another voice inside Aventurine’s head replied—the same voice that grew louder by the passing seconds. It means the death of those hostages, and perhaps, yours too.
Calm down, Aventurine. There’s no way you would fail. Aventurine clutched his hand, trying to compose himself. He never lost before.
Doesn’t mean it was impossible, though . That voice chuckled, mocking him. Foolish Aventurine. What makes you think your luck was limitless?
Stop it . Aventurine wanted to scream at whatever that voice was. Hey, maybe he should try knocking his own head, maybe it could help him get rid of that pestering voice inside his head.
But before he managed to do or say anything, another voice interfered. Only this time—despite how harsh it sounded, Aventurine was glad to hear it more than anything. “This is not the best time to zone out, gambler.”
“Who said I am zoning out, my dear Doctor?” Aventurine chuckled, his eyes moved to meet the man sitting on the couch before him. “Tsk tsk. When will you finally stop accusing me of stuff I didn’t do?”
Ratio didn’t say a word, he merely raised his eyebrow. His eyes stared back at Aventurine sharply—like a scalpel. It made Aventurine feel as if he was lying on the operating table and Ratio was dissecting the truth out of him.
Aventurine sighed in defeat. “Fine, fine. You caught me red-handed. I did zone out,” he raised his hands dismissively. “But can you really blame me? They put us on wait for- how long now? An hour already?”
“You are exagerating. It’s only been 17 minutes and 23 seconds.”
“Exactly, and I’m bored!” Aventurine whined, throwing his hands to emphasize his words. “There’s nothing we can do here to kill some time. And you’re not exactly the person who likes to chit-chat.”
Even when his eyes were closed, Aventurine could tell how hard Ratio was holding himself not to roll his eyes. “If you want to discuss our plan, then I am more than willing to oblige. But clearly, that is not what you want, is it?” Ratio asked.
Aventurine pouted. “You really are a stiff person, aren’t you?”
“I prefer the word efficient,” Ratio huffed. “Besides, it’s highly unnecessary to waste our time on a chatter. Why don’t you tell me more about your master plan instead, gambler?”
Aventurine gave the question a thought for a second—even though he knew the answer already. “Does going on with the flow and using all bargaining chips we have count as a plan?”
Ratio let out a small groan, which means the answer was no .
Aventurine chuckled. Talking with Ratio did soothe his fear—just a little bit, the anxiety was still there, but at least he started to feel more positive about the negotiation they were about to face.
But what if your negotiation fails and they die?
Aventurine kept his gaze on the floor, focusing on stopping his mind from talking further. Instead, the image of those lower IPC members and the scholars from the Intelligentsia Guild—dead on the ground, began to flood his head. Forcing his right hand, which was hidden between his crossed legs all this time, to clenched tight again.
Now is not the time. Aventurine gritted his teeth. But if he fails…
After another long minute of heavy silence, he could hear a sigh coming from the Doctor. Aventurine smiled, bracing himself for another round of Ratio's harsh scolding.
..Only to be surprised by what the Doctor said to him next. “Give me your hand.”
Aventurine nearly choked. “What?”
“Must I repeat everything to you twice? I said, give me your hand.”
“No, it’s not that- I heard you the first time.” Aventurine shook his head. “It’s just, why would you need my hands for, Doctor?” He asked, smiling confusedly now.
“Just give me your hand,” Ratio ordered again. How very answering of you, Ratio —Aventurine wanted to say, but instead, he found himself pushing that response to the back of his throat and held out his left hand.
“Have you no basic manner? Surely you must know using your left hand is considered disrespectful,” Ratio sighed impatiently again as he extended his own hand. “Give me your other hand.”
Aventurine tensed up. He unconsciously tried to bury his hand away from Ratio’s keen gaze. “Wait now. You haven’t answered my question yet Ratio,” he said, trying to buy some time.
“You too haven't done per my request,” Ratio replied. “Why should I answer your question then, dear gambler?”
Aventurine smiled wryly. It was not like he didn’t want to do what Ratio asked him for.
It was just if he did…
Aventurine peeked at his right hand, still visibly shaking.
It would also mean showing Ratio how scared he actually was.
Aventurine stared at the door from the corner of his eyes in panic—no sign of it being opened, no sign of a servant coming out and calling them in.
He was stuck, with no way to escape.
Aventurine forced out a chuckle. “Sorry, Doc. I’m just playing with you,” he grinned. “Of course I know basic manners.”
“Then what are you waiting for?”
Calm down, it’s just Ratio.
“Nothing,” He replied, taking one last deep breath. Hesitantly, Aventurine slowly took his hand from its hiding spot and held it out towards the Doctor.
Shit. Aventurine cursed. Of course it was still trembling.
Keeping his gaze low, Aventurine tried to come out with excuses. Anything was fine—he thought, as long as it could cover up the truth, or just distract would be good too.
He glanced at Ratio. The Doctor hadn’t said anything yet, and it was not like Aventurine could guess what was going through inside his genius brain right now, not when his expression remained the same as ever.
The room temperature was too cold. It’s like they want to make us freeze to death here.
Just a small uptight before the mission. haha. Nothing to be worried about.
Or-
Or maybe you could just admit that you are actually just a scaredy cat. That voice came whispering again. Aventurine could almost imagine it staring at him with a crooked smile. And let’s see what he thinks about you after that.
Ratio finally opened his mouth, and Aventurine abruptly blurted out. “Haha, don’t worry about that, Doctor. It’s just-” He laughed nervously as he tried to withdraw his hand. Unfortunately for him, Ratio was faster. He already caught his hand first before Aventurine could make any move.
“Do you know just how dangerous it is to go into a battlefield with shaking hands like this?” Ratio asked, lifting Aventurine’s hand a little.
Aventurine slowly stared at Ratio again, slightly surprised by the Doctor’s tone, which remained collected as he took a look at Aventurine's hand—not a hint of condescending or annoyance in it.
Honestly, at this rate, Ratio looked just like a regular Doctor who was doing a checkup on his patient.
“..Ratio?”
He got ignored again. “Had the situation turned against our favor and we’re stuck in a cross-fire. One missed shot from your trembling hand is what it takes to ruin everything and cause us more trouble,” Ratio paused for a while. “Which also means I am the one who is forced to clear up your mess.”
That’s not going to happen. Aventurine wanted to reply, but somehow his voice got stuck.
When Ratio had finished inspecting his hand, Aventurine expected him to let go immediately. But instead, Ratio did the most unthinkable thing that Aventurine would never imagine him doing again—not even in dreams.
Ratio did release his hand—for a short while, only to press their palms together gently after that. Steady hand against Aventurine’s trembling hand.
Aventurine’s eyes widened in shock, his frantic smile gradually faded away.
This gesture. How… How did Ratio know?
Another voice echoed inside his head, this time it was warm and familiar. May the Mother Goddess thrice close her eyes for you.
Aventurine didn’t know whether the Doctor knew about the special blessing or not. He probably knew but chose not to say it out loud.
Not that it was necessary. After all, Aventurine still remembers it—word by word, like he just heard his sister tell him yesterday.
..keeping your blood eternally pulsing.
“I..” Aventurine opened his mouth, but nothing came out. He was too startled to even have a proper reaction. “Why did you..”
May your journey forever be forever peaceful..
“It’s not important. Just calm yourself first, Aventurine.” Ratio looked at him and sighed again—softer this time. “..And don’t cause us more problems.”
..and your schemes forever concealed.
And by the time Ratio finally let go, Aventurine found himself finally able to breathe calmly. His heart didn’t go like it was about to blow up from the inside, and most importantly, his hand had stopped shaking.
“Mister Aventurine, Doctor Ratio?” He heard the sound of a steel door sliding open, and a woman's voice calling them from behind. “My Master is ready to meet you now.”
“Ugh finally. He already kept us waiting for far too long.” Ratio muttered.
“Hurry up now, dear gambler,” Aventurine snapped back from his shocked state when Ratio called his name. When Aventurine glanced up, Ratio already waiting for him on the side. “The sooner this negotiation ends, the better.”
“Oh- Right,” Aventurine quickly followed, putting up a smile before making his way to Ratio’s side.
“Thank you, Ratio.” He managed to whisper before they were about to walk through the door. “For.. what you did earlier.”
“Don’t mention it,” Ratio replied. “Just remember what I told you earlier.”
Aventurine laughed, and it was lighter than before. “Right, right. Of course. How can I forget a Doctor’s order?”
And with that, the door swiftly closed behind them.