Chapter Text
Mobei-jun remembers Shang Qinghua being messy, skittish, and jumpy. He remembers Shang Qinghua being a coy and shameless coward.
Yet he also remembers Shang Qinghua being useful, dangerously smart, a look in his eyes that held knowledge beyond mortal and even demon understanding. His posture radiated an unconscious need for respect and power that often wilted under the harsh gaze of his king.
Shang Qinghua is a coward. That's all Mobei-jun knew about his loyal servant for a time. It was a definite fact. The sky is blue, the grass is green, and Shang Qinghua is a coward.
This fact was so engraved into the very depths of Mobei-jun's mind that he finds himself surprised each time the human saves him. He should not be surprised. Time and time again, the idiotic coward proved his loyalty and devotion to the Northern king, and yet Mobei-jun is still surprised by it. This kind of loyalty was something never to be seen in a normal day, a rarity in itself.
And Mobei-jun took it for granted.
Now all he can do is dwell in the memories of that damned human, the coward, the stupidly beautiful and endearingly idiotic yet smart coward, because Shang Qinghua left. He swore to always be by Mobei-jun's side, and he left. If he was not grieving, Mobei-jun would have laughed at the irony of it all. All this power at his hands, at the tip of his fingertips, and what use is it to him if he could not even keep the cultivator by his side?
Shang Qinghua was the only one who stayed by his side throughout it all. The human helped him rise to the very top, offered knowledge and advice no normal human or mortal would have ever known, sacrificed everything to make sure Mobei-jun rightfully became king. Truly, Mobei-jun should have treated him like a precious treasure. He should have rewarded Shang Qinghua with the finest furs and silks, should have served the small human with nothing but top-quality food from the best chefs across all the realms. Shang Qinghua should have been treated like Mobei-jun's wife, his Queen, like the demon had intended to make him.
If Shang Qinghua is a coward, what does that make Mobei-jun?
An idiot, perhaps. A desperate idiot, desperate enough to kneel before a damned human cultivator—Shen Qingqiu, Luo Binghe's human, because for some reason the two Peak Lords knew each other so intimately in a way that made something in Mobei-jun's gut curl with an unpleasant sort of envy—and beg for help. Plead. He probably looked ridiculous in this (almost) kowtow position but what else was he to do?
It was for Qinghua, after all.
He didn't dare to look up, not when the two equally cold gazes already pierce through his very soul and existence. Sometimes he wonders if he and Shang Qinghua exude this type of fearsome energy too, if he could have a fraction of the relationship Luo Binghe and Shen Qingqiu had but with his human servant. A ridiculous wish, yet Mobei-Jun's heart longs for it.
A sigh escapes the human consort's lips, and Mobei-jun couldn't fight the urge to finally look up. He tried not to snarl at the sight of two pairs of harsh eyes gazing down at him. Shen Qingqiu snapped his fan shut.
"Knowing Shang-shidi, he would have very well left this world by now, if he was truly as agitated as you described him to be." Shen Qingqiu laughed with no humor, like he was simply making a light joke, but a part of Mobei-jun wonders if his human servant could truly travel worlds.
He probably could. After so long with Shang Qinghua by his side, Mobei-jun knows that he's clever enough to figure out a way. "...forgive my insolence but surely not. Surely Shang Qinghua wouldn't have left this Lord after making such a bold oath to stay by this Lord's side." Mobei-jun says through gritted teeth.
It only served to make his Junshang scoff. "You are being ridiculous. For what reasons do you need that human?"
Mobei-jun wishes he knew the answer himself.
-//-
The search is long and difficult. Of course it is, anything that related to Shang Qinghua of all people was always so damn difficult.
Mobei-jun searched far and wide, high and low, in the depths of every place he could ever imagine his servant would deign his presence in but always came out of these searches with nothing but an ugly feeling in his chest.
Difficult.
Monsters and creatures were slain, demons and humans alike pressed for answers, whole towns and villages ransacked in search of one cultivator. Nobody knew any answer, nor anything that could help the Northern King.
Difficult.
Mobei-jun knew that this was the price to pay, but he was a demon and demons are known to be greedy. Known to just take and take and take until nothing was left to take, and even then they still did. Mobei-jun was, is, greedy. When has he ever denied this fact? Not when all he's ever done is take everything Qinghua has given him and give nothing of value in return.
Difficult.
The entire Northern Dessert has been looked over at least four times by now, and fortunately Junshang had granted Mobei-jun permission to search in other territories. It was tedious and annoying to search through lands unfamiliar to him, but he knew Shang Qinghua was too smart to just stay in the North when it was clear he was hiding from his king.
Mobei-jun wished it wasn't so difficult.
-//-
Shang Qinghua has been gone long enough for Mobei-jun to start doubting whether his affections were truly understood by the human. He knew to some extent that they both like each other, which Shang Qinghua made rather obvious when he used to sneak glances towards Mobei-jun when he thought his king wasn't looking.
And Mobei-jun always sought after the human. He had followed the courting techniques he was familiar with, he had given gifts, he showed off his strength, he showed that he was sure that Shang Qinghua could withstand great challenges by hitting him..
Yet only one look at Junshang's consort made Mobei-jun realize he did it all wrong. Shang Qinghua was human, the most human creature he has ever met. Demonic courting practices were not familiar to him, especially the violent nature of it all.
Mobei-jun failed once again. He wished he hadn't.
-//-
Mobei-jun remembers Shang Qinghua's knowledge, how he always seemed to guess the outcome of a situation before the situation even happened, how he knew each and every solution to every little thing that bugged his king.Knowledge beyond what mortals should have.
It was an easy answer, his little human was a God. Mobei-jun spent a few hours alone to process this fact. Now, it seems so painfully obvious, and the demon had just ignored the signs all along.
The sky is blue, the grass is green, Shang Qinghua is a God. His God.
Ironic how that same God allowed himself to be mistreated and pushed around by such an insignificant being like Mobei-jun, and now he was pushed too far. Now he left, and the demon couldn't help but think Shang Qinghua should be allowed to leave. Especially after all he's been through in Mobei-jun's rule.
Still, Mobei-jun is greedy and won't stop until he has found Shang Qinghua. He won't stop until his affections are made clear, he won't stop until his Qinghua is once again in his rightful place right next to his king.
A king and his God. A God and his king.
Isn't that how it was supposed to be?
-//-
Finding Shang Qinghua in the human realm was to be expected, the silence throughout the journey back to the North is not. Mobei-jun remembers Shang Qinghua to be an explosion of words, always making noise in one way or another. He was never just quiet.
Shang Qinghua is quiet.
Not for the first time, Mobei-jun wishes he knew his way with words. He was never one to speak, always deeming his actions enough to convey what he felt, but now it felt like nothing is enough.
"Tell me what you want, I will give it all!" He wanted to say, to scream. "Anything you wish to have, anything at all. Just give me something to work with."
He says nothing.
They are both quiet.