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Exhausted was not the right word to describe how he felt. Being the Acting Grand Sage was taking its toll on him, even after he had resigned, he had to keep working, as no one else was suitable for the position. This job was only bringing more and more problems into his life. Coming home at noon became coming home around five, six, or even seven in the evening. Sure, he had breaks, but they were not enough. The meetings exhausted him too much, everyone was demanding that he fix everything as if he was the one who had broken everything. On the other hand, Kaveh had been more irritable than usual lately, the architect understood that he was busy, but he had his own needs too.
He felt his legs shaking, the overstimulation was killing him. He had been held up several times by some scholars who couldn't understand that he was out of his working hours, and therefore wouldn't answer any of their complaints or questions. He wanted to get home and ask his boyfriend to cuddle with him.
His keys were inside his backpack, he had forgotten to pack his lunch, so he was almost starving. Kaveh had been busy with a client at noon, so he couldn't bring him the lunch he always used to get him. For Alhaitham, his breaks were sacred, and so was Kaveh, so eating with his partner was always something that helped him relax, but today it was impossible.
He opened the door to their shared house and the smell of Padisarah hit him almost immediately. Kaveh knew he didn't like incense, so he only put it on when he wasn't around. His senses overloaded even more and he cursed himself for being who he was.
A whimper escaped his lips, he let the cloak hang down and if it wasn't for his boyfriend's embrace, he would have fallen to the ground. Immediately, he felt that soothing massage on his scalp that he loved so much. He loved this man and he loved how much he understood him.
“Hard day?" the blond-haired man asked, as he stroked the ex-scribe's back. He nodded and rested his head on Kaveh's shoulder. “Why don't you go to our room and grab some clothes for an after-dinner bath, mhn?" His junior's grip tightened a little more.
No, I don't want to, I want to stay with you. Come with me, please.
“Oh, it's one of those days, isn't it? There was no answer, that meant yes. “That's it, my love, today is Friday, today we can rest here together, okay?”
After numerous attempts at convincing him, Kaveh managed to bring Alhaitham to the dinner table.
The younger one was eating very slowly, almost as if he wasn't hungry.
“Honey, am I going to have to feed you." The blond joked softly, making the man blush. “Aw, you blushed. It's okay, love, I'll take care of you, you know I love it.”
Despite what his boyfriend said, Alhaitham was a functioning adult —at least most of the time— who didn't need looking after. That's what he liked to think, of course. His pride was damaged when someone older than him fed him as if he were a child. On top of that, he still had to bathe and didn't have the energy to do so, which meant Kaveh would have to help him again.
“Mhm, very good.” Embarrassment was swallowing him completely. “What a good boy.” Ah…
“Don't make fun of me..." Alhaitham opened his mouth to complain but was silenced by a spoonful of food.
“I'm not making fun of you, honey.” Another spoon silenced him again. “I know you like it when I talk to you like that, don't you?” Well, that was undeniable. Being praised was something the Acting Grand Sage didn't usually enjoy publicly. He usually denied anything positive or negative about himself, trying to make people have the most neutral opinion of him. But when it came to Kaveh, oh, being called a good boy , a hard worker and so much more made him feel all too special. “You can't lie.”
As always, the architect could see right through him. Alhaitham used to think of them as soulmates. Like the moon and the sun, light and darkness, spring and autumn. They would always find each other, even if not directly. He was so grateful to have him in his life, he had been the light of his life, the Light of Khashrewar, the light of Sumeru.
“And... that was the last one, do you want more?" The silver-haired man shook his head, he had only uttered about two or three words the entire evening, so he assumed his boyfriend thought he was simply in "non-verbal mode" as he used to call it.
His grandmother had taken him to a friend who used to be a doctor at the time because of the way he was. Don't get her wrong, she just wanted the best for her grandson. This friend diagnosed him with autism, he used to have no friends as a child, he was always in his world with his books, his grandmother already knew from the moment she saw him with a book bigger than his head when he was only nine years old, that he was going to end up studying in Haravatat.
When he told Kaveh, his first friend, he did not know about the existence of such a condition, as ten years ago it was not so well known, let alone people talking about it. Still, the blond made an effort and started a little personal research.
He learned the things that bothered his best friend's sensitive ears, the words he should and should not use in front of him, how to treat him properly when he was overstimulated, and much, much more.
By the time Alhaitham wanted to tell his grandmother, she had passed away.
I have met someone, Enne.
He is blond and studies at Kshahrewar, as you once did. He is my best friend, or so other people like to call us. He understands me like no one else ever has. He is a year older than me, taller and smarter. People call him the Light of Kshahrewar because he is the best in his class. I'm sure he's the best student Kshahrewar has ever had, after you, obviously.
I think I've fallen in love.
You always told me that one day I would find someone to be myself with, to express what I think or feel. You said to me that I would find out on my own, that when I see that person I will know, I will know what love is.
Kaveh has taught me what love is.
You, more than anyone, know that it has never been easy for me to express myself, I have always been difficult to read and much more difficult to understand. Kaveh can read me like an open book. He has researched my condition, he respects me, he values me and he understands me.
I am sure you would like him very much.
He never gave her the letter. He never put it in her grave. He was scared. What if Kaveh found out somehow? He would rather die than be rejected by his childhood sweetheart.
Years later, he saw an opportunity to offer him a room in his house. He knew perfectly well that Kaveh and his guilt complex would refuse, so he proposed a rent instead of a free stay. Alhaitham didn't need the money, let alone want it, he had got a job with a stable salary at the Akademiya. He promised himself not to fall in love with the same person again, and he did not.
He wasn't able to fall in love again, because the first time was enough to leave him in love with the blond for the rest of his life. Still, the architect ended up realising the feelings of the by then scribe.
It had been on a night like this when he had arrived home exhausted in the evening after a long meeting that he had to attend. Kaveh ran him a hot bath and massaged his shoulders. Finally, he prepared his comfort food —that was what the blond called Alhaitham's favourite food— and dined with him in comfortable silence.
Halfway through dinner, Alhaitham began to cry. Kaveh despaired, for he did not know what to do, his junior had never cried in front of him, let alone so inconsolably. Despite all his attempts, he could not find a way to calm him down even a little. Still, he stayed by his side until the crying stopped and it was then that the silver-haired man confessed to his former best friend that he had been in love with him since they were young.
Kaveh told him he felt the same and a long make-out session on the couch with the blond sitting on Alhaitham's lap with his hands around his neck and the aforementioned man's arms around his waist ensued.
And now here they were, back in that situation, except this time there were no tears. Kaveh escorted him to the bathroom and helped him take off his clothes together, subsequently giving him a good but short bath.
“I can wash your hair tomorrow, okay? I don't want you to go to sleep with wet hair, you might catch a cold and as much as I like taking care of you, I'd rather you didn't get sick." The blond smiled at him, admiring the ex-scribe's tired face. He nodded and let himself be pampered by his boyfriend.
When he had finished bathing and washing his partner with a damp, soapy cloth, he helped him to his room. Kaveh dressed him in his favourite jumper and changed the sheets in front of him.
“Come on.” Alhaitham lay down first, letting Kaveh hug him. The ex-scribe hid his face in the architect's neck, letting himself rest after an exhausting week. “I'm so proud of you, my love," his junior smiled and snuggled even closer to his partner. “My good and beautiful boy... very beautiful, yes." A few kisses on his hair and a few caresses later, Alhaitham fell asleep.
Kaveh smiled with a chest full of joy. His junior was resting, he deserved it. The blond couldn't ask for anything better from the Archons than this.
“Rest, Hayi…”