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“After two girls, I was almost surprised to be having a boy.” Amanda said to Sonny as she looked down at Nicky. Jessie and Billie had just gone home with Olivia, and now the two of them were enjoying some quiet time with their new baby boy.
“You really thought I was going to stay in the minority?” Sonny asked, laughing. “Wait…I guess I still am. There are three girls and two boys, as Billie just reminded me.”
“It’s not so much that. I just kind of thought I’d complete the trifecta since I had Jessie and Billie, and even Frannie is a girl. But I admit, it’s pretty cool to have a son since I didn’t change my last name and you have someone to carry on your family name.” Amanda had briefly considered changing her name from Rollins to Carisi, but decided to stay with her maiden name for the sake of work and still having a streak of independence within her. Besides, these days, no one batted an eye at a married woman who kept her maiden name. She loved her unique blended family, and keeping her name symbolized that.
“Not to mention, this baby wasn’t really planned,” she continued. “I mean, I know we joked about it a little bit after we got married, but you knew I wasn’t sure about having more kids. And I liked that you weren’t super pushy about the topic. Go figure, I got pregnant with Nicky when we weren’t really expecting it. One thing stayed true to form from my old life, I guess. I’ve come to expect the unexpected.
“But how do you feel now that you’re a biological father?”
Sonny sat down in the chair next to her bed, and she gave Nicky to him.
“You know,” he started to say. “I always tried to treat Jessie and Billie as my own. The closer I got to you, the more I felt like they were my daughters too. I knew they were a part of you, and I wanted to integrate into your life rather than expecting you to change everything you were used to and your personality to fit my life and my goals. Sure, that was made easier by the fact that we worked together and had similar plans and interests, but we came from really different backgrounds. And somehow, we’ve built a family.”
“The girls are basically yours and mine. I couldn’t have said it any better.”
“I guess I didn’t really answer your question, though. I’ve always loved kids and hoped to become a father. But I knew I didn’t want to settle down with just any woman so I could achieve an item on my bucket list. Now that we have Nicky, I feel complete. Yeah, part of that is having another Carisi and a baby named after me. The other part of it is that we’re really united now. We got married last year, and that was the legal part. And we could call ourselves a family with Jessie and Billie, but this seems different, for a reason I can’t quite explain.”
“Is it because Nicky is biologically and legally ours?” Amanda asked. “Technically, Jessie and Billie don’t have your names on their birth certificates, which you know doesn’t matter to me because you’ve been more of a parent than their biological fathers have been anyway.”
“Yes, that’s it exactly.” Sonny finally realized what he was thinking but Amanda articulated. “We brought this baby into the world together and I get to say that I’m his father and this is my son. The girls will never look like me, which like you said, that doesn’t matter. Still, it’s because we’ve added Nicky to our unit. That’s something we can point to as a married couple. We can say this is our son and mean it with every piece of our hearts. And not to mention, I can brag about how amazing my wife is for going through pregnancy and labor three times. Strangers won’t know that we weren’t married all these years anyway.”
“I’m glad you feel that way,” she said. “Because I have something to tell you.”
“I’m all ears.”
“Sonny, this is my last labor and delivery.” She let out a deep sigh and looked straight ahead. “I don’t know if you were hoping for the large, loud Italian family to carry on tradition or something like that, but by the time we got together, I already had Jessie and Billie. You’ll never directly understand, but this isn’t an easy thing to go through, and now that we’re married and have Nicky, I decided when I was pushing that this was the grand finale. I mean, I did feel that way during the pregnancy and you remember that I alluded to the fact that I didn’t want any more children after this, but I’m telling you now, this is really it.”
She looked over at him, awaiting his reaction. Would he be hurt? Disappointed? Probably not. That wasn’t like him. But given that he was still on a high from seeing his son for the first time, she couldn’t help but wonder if he’d try to encourage her to have one or two more.
“Three’s a crowd,” he said. “After all, at the end of the day, I could want you to have 10 more, but you have to do most of the work. I just hold your hand and cheer you on. Do you…want me to get snipped or anything?” He started squirming at the thought, which made them laugh.
“If I end up pregnant again in another year or two, you will!" she said through her laughter.
“All right, at least you understand,” she added once they had settled down a little. “But I feel like I have it all now, finally. I’m with the man I love more than anything, who loves me the same way. I’ve come to enjoy being a mother after initially never thinking I’d go down that path. It’s so fun to see the girls grow and get closer to you. And now they have a little brother to play with and hold, and I just want to watch everyone grow up together and make memories. Not to mention, we are in a good place in our careers and work less stressful hours, so we have a lot of family time at night and on weekends.”
“We only needed one, huh?” he asked.
“One more, if we’re going to get technical. I guess I just don’t see any reason to keep chasing happiness when I already have it. Why mess with a good thing?”
Sonny put an arm around her and let her hold Nicky again.
“You know what? You’re right, Amanda. We have our son and our daughters. I found the right woman to have children with. You gave me the girls, and we created Nicky. Mission accomplished.”
“Good. Because honestly, the novelty of being pregnant wears off after a while anyway. I am going to be very happy to be free of maternity clothes, morning sickness, weight gain, and all the other ugly stuff that comes with it.”
“Well, let me know if you change your mind and you really do want to experience it all again because either way, you know I think you’re beautiful and I admire how resilient you've been all these years.”
She pretended to be thinking hard about his proposition, and then she shook her head.
“Nope. We’re set for life.”
Amanda knew she didn’t need to keep having children to prove that her marriage to Sonny was a good one. Sometimes, going one and done—or, in her case, three and done—was really the best route.
Once they got home from the hospital, the real fun would begin.
