Work Text:
December 13th, 1985
Joyce Byers wandered around the store in an attempt to go Christmas shopping.
She had already done most of it for Will and Jonathan but was struggling to find anything for El.
After Hopper’s death, she took her in, though she has 17 years of experience being a mother and Christmas shopping every year, she’s never had a daughter.
She doesn’t know what to get her. She’s tried asking El but she still isn’t much of a talker after losing her dad, though she’s always been quiet.
Joyce found a pretty button-up top with pink and white stripes that she thought she’d like, hoped she’d like, so she picked it up and put it into the cart. That’s enough shopping for today I think, she thought to herself. So she checked out and drove home.
It was snowing. Hard.
As she pulled into the driveway she struggled to get to the doorway carrying all of her groceries. She trudged into the silent house, it’s dark and cozy, just lit with a few lamps in the living room. She quickly took the gifts to her room to hide and made her way to the kitchen to start making dinner with the groceries she’d bought.
It was 5:32, Jonathan and Will were at the Wheelers, and El had fallen asleep on the couch watching a movie. Joyce let her sleep while she cooked, as the boys would be home right around the time dinner would be ready.
Joyce heard shuffling in the living room and then little pittering footsteps behind her.
“Hi Honey,” Joyce said to El as she rubbed her eyes from sleep.
“Hi” her voice was so quiet. “What are you making?” El asked quietly as she wrapped her arms around Joyce in a hug.
“Spaghetti, you hungry?” Joyce said, hugging her back.
Joyce could tell she was sad, and El could tell Joyce was sad.
“Yes,” El responded as she pulled away from Joyce to get a glass of water.
Joyce could hear Jonathan’s car pull up into the driveway and soon after heard the two boys walk into the door.
“Hi, Mom!” both of her boys said at the same time.
“Hey guys!”
The both of them then said hello to El and took off their coats covered in snow just from walking in the door.
“Dinner’s almost ready, why don’t you two go get into some more comfortable clothes.”
“Okay,” they both said as they walked into their bedrooms.
The four of them sat and ate dinner while they talked about their days, El was pretty quiet unsurprisingly but she seemed to enjoy watching the 3 of them talk. Will and Jonathan excused themselves from the dinner table once they were done to go to their rooms and El stayed back to help Joyce clean up.
Though she hasn’t been very talkative lately, she was happiest around Joyce. Joyce was one of the only people who truly made her feel safe.
They were also on the same level, El had lost her Father and Joyce had lost the love of her life, while he was alive she didn’t know that, but now she does.
In the beginning, Joyce would share her clothes with El, Joyce had gotten El new clothes soon after El moved in, and with the cabin being pretty much destroyed most of her clothes were as well.
At this point, El had her own clothes, but she still loved wearing Joyce’s clothes, something about it was comforting to her. So of course when El got done with her shower she was wearing a pair of Joyce’s pajama pants that were probably older than Will and one of her Dad’s old T-shirts.
Now with a woman in her life, a role model, El started to take after Joyce, always wearing similar outfits as her.
When Joyce got out of the shower after El she walked into the living room to see El and her boys watching a movie.
“What are you guys watching?” she asked from the kitchen.
“Star Wars, you should watch it with us!” Will said.
El just sat there and smiled slightly at Joyce.
“I’d love to guys but I'm so tired and I need to go to work early tomorrow, so I think I’ll go to bed.” The boys nodded and El looked sad.
“Maybe another night though, just make sure to go to bed soon it’s getting late.” She said to her kids.
She wasn’t exactly tired, she just needed a cover-up to be alone for a while. Some days were easier than others but today was one of the hard ones.
She missed Hopper.
She laid down in her cold bed and felt alone, she was wearing a printed T-shirt of Hopper’s she found in a box when she went through his cabin. When she’s alone at night she can’t help but think how it was all her fault. El’s father was gone. How he was gone. She turned the key and he’s the reason he died.
The pressure of grief and guilt hit her hard, she could barely breathe. She laid there and couldn’t breathe, then she started to cry. She tried to be as quiet as she could but her head started to pound as she laid there, curled up into a ball and trying not to scream.
It felt like forever as she laid there and just cried until she heard walking in the hallway. The kids must be going to bed. El now had her own room in the new house but on the days she was upset she’d usually sleep in Joyce’s room, just for comfort.
El hadn’t come into her room so she assumed she was okay. Joyce continued to cry after the
house went quiet again, her eyes felt swollen and heavy as her head pounded in pain from the crying. It mostly hurt because she was trying to stay as quiet as possible, letting out silent sobs as she covered her mouth, but her heart was broken. She thought she was being quiet until she heard her bedroom door open.
“Joyce?” El whispered from the doorway of her room.
Joyce quickly whipped her eyes and sat up in bed.
“El? What's wrong? Did you have another nightmare?”
Joyce tried to act normal like she wasn’t just sobbing her heart out over someone she’d never see again.
“No.” El said quietly “I heard you crying, what's wrong?”
Joyce wasn’t as quiet as she thought she was.
“Oh,” Joyce said quietly and just looked down.
El closed the door behind her and came to sit on Joyce’s bed next to her. She turned on the lamp on her nightstand and saw how red and puffy Joyce’s face was from crying.
“You were crying.” Joyce just looked sad and didn’t say anything.
“Why are you crying?” El asked again to get her to talk
“Oh… I just miss your Dad that's all” she said with a tiny smile as she sniffed.
El looked at her with a sad smile, “It’s okay, I miss him too..”
El shifted under the covers to get closer to Joyce. Joyce laid back down and so did the teenager resting her head on Joyce’s chest, she's always loved Joyce as a mother, ever since she first met her in 1983.
They laid there in silence, just once in a while sniffles can be heard until Joyce makes another attempt at asking El what she’d like for Christmas. El just lays there and thinks while Joyce plays with El’s hair which has grown so much longer in the past few months.
“I was thinking maybe some Converse shoes? Max has them and I think they’re cool.”
Joyce smiled at her and nodded. “Of course, what color?”
“Maybe… red? To match hers? And if that isn’t an option I like the white ones.” El said happily.
“I’ll see what I can do,” Joyce said and smiled.
They soon fell asleep cuddled up together and Joyce hadn’t cried herself to sleep for the first time in a while.