Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

The first time Kinger met Ragatha was after a particularly long adventure at the circus. 

The characters of the time had been tired. Most had already retreated to their rooms by the time Kinger and Queenie stood up from the digital buffet to get a well-deserved rest. Caine had disappeared to prepare for tomorrow’s adventure, leaving the circus tent relatively peaceful. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary.

And then, commotion. 

Some of the remaining characters were gathered around something out of his view, murmuring to each other things that didn’t quite reach his ear. From the way they were speaking, they seemed unusually alarmed.

Kinger and Queenie were the self-proclaimed royals of this place; they were the oldest members, after all. They took care of things and made sure everyone was alright. So they didn’t hesitate to join the others to try and figure out what was going on. They climbed the stage where the group was gathered. Despite Socks' large frame still obscuring his view, Kinger had a feeling of what it was. Or rather, who.

And there, in the spotlight of the center stage, stood a small ragdoll. 

She was wearing a blue dress with darker patches all over it, her red, yarn-like hair hanged from her head. She was sitting on the floor, clawing at her face with her plush hands—a common reaction they all had after putting on the headset that condemned them to this digital purgatory. 

“Is that a new human?”

“It’s been a while since the last time.”

“Just what we need around here, a new doll…”

A chorus of voices engulfed the already overwhelmed victim as all the characters spoke simultaneously, closing in on her.

Queenie sprang into action before he could. “Alright everyone, let’s give her some space.” She placed herself in front of the doll, shielding her from the prying eyes while trying to get everyone to step backwards. 

Meanwhile, Kinger kneeled in front of her, maintaining a respectful distance. “Are you alright, dear?” He smiled despite his lack of mouth.

From this distance, he noticed one of her eyes being a single blue button. Could she even see through it? Her other eye had a very small black pupil, though that was likely a result of her current state of distress.

“A giant chess piece… is talking to me.”

“You can make that two.” Queenie joined them once the mob had dispersed somewhat. “Hello there.”

“Um. Excuse me. I think I’m going to…“ She had passed out before she could finish the sentence. 

Kinger caught her just in time to prevent her head from hitting the floor. He was surprised by how light she felt; she must be filled with some sort of airy stuffing. Foam, perhaps?

“Well, she’s dead. That was a record.” Kaufmo joked from the crowd.

“We can’t die in here, smart a$€&.” Wiggle rolled their eyes.

“NOW, WHAT’S GOING ON AROUND HERE?” 

Kinger attempted to mask his disappointment. He had been naive to think their ringmaster would be too preoccupied with tomorrow's adventure to notice the new arrival. Caine was precisely the last thing the poor girl needed right now. 

“GASPS! IS THAT A NEW HUMAN MY SENSORS SPOT?” In an instant, he identified the newest character and teleported next to them. “GREETING, AND WELCOME TO THE AMAZING DIGITAL CIRCUS!” He stretched out his hand for a handshake that went ignored by the unconscious doll.

“I don’t think she can hear you…” Socks said.

“OH! HM…” Caine approached her with unusual care, gently grasping her shoulders. Kinger handed her over wearily, surprised at how cautiously the AI was handling her.

And then he shook her.

“ARE YOU AWAKE, DOLLY?” The AI’s voice, despite its volume, was nearly drowned out by the girl’s scream. 

“Okay, Caine, I believe that’s enough!” Queenie separated them before she could have a heart attack. 

The moment she was released from the ringmaster's grasp, she sprang to her feet and made a frantic attempt to flee.

She tripped immediately.

The sound that she made upon falling was similar to a pillow slipping from the bed at night.

“Oof! Wha-“ She turned onto her back to glance at what caused her fall. “What happened to my feet?!”

She wiggled her legs with unhidden horror. They were as simplistic as they could be, devoid of any human musculature or definition. Her 'feet', if they could be called that, were two black squares at the bottom meant to resemble shoes. It reminded Kinger more of the hooves of a horse than anything else.

“Count yourself lucky to get to have some legs.” Wiggle muttered bitterly. Being a worm on a string, they had none whatsoever. Or feet. Or arms.

The doll was too busy examining her own body to pay them any mind. “I- Oh my god, why are my fingers glued together?!” 

“YES, I’M SURE YOU MUST BE LOVING YOUR PERSONALIZED DIGITAL AVATAR!” Caine said, oblivious as always. “SO! EXCITED TO START YOUR NEW LIFE IN THIS DIGITAL REALM?”

All eyes returned to the doll, awaiting her reaction. She fell silent for a moment, her expression more perplexed than fearful. Then, she emitted an almost hysterical laugh and waved her hand dismissively.

“Haha! Seems I'm a bit out of touch with these hyper-realistic video games. Too immersive for my taste. If it's not too much trouble, could you tell me how to leave now? Thank you.”

Caine opened his snout. “A-“ Error. They’d lost him.

She glanced at the other characters. “Do I… press any particular button or…?”

Silence. 

This was the part Kinger despised the most. No matter how many times they had to explain it to each victim, it never got easier. The absolute look of horror in their eyes. The despair of realizing that this was not a temporary situation, but a prison for the rest of their lives.

“Oh, honey…” Queenie’s voice was soft. “I’m afraid it’s not that simple.”

“I’m sorry, I don’t follow.”

Perhaps it was too soon. At the very least, she deserved some time to piece everything together on her own.

“My, where are our manners!” The chess king intervened. “We haven’t presented ourselves yet. My name is Kinger, and this is my wife, Queenie. Those are Kaufmo, Wiggle and Socks.” He gestured towards the three figures standing farther away from them.

With the change of subject, the AI snapped out of its glitch. “AND I’M CAINE, YOUR GRACIOUS, HANDSOME, SMART-“

“I think we get it.” Wiggle commented.

“-RINGMASTER! AND HERE’S BUBBLE 1.0!” 

From his top hat emerged a small bubble with pointy teeth. Kinger knew the AI had been experimenting with permanent NPCs, though this was the first time seeing this one.

“Hello! I sure am excited to EAT you.” Loud bleeping noise. “I meant MEET you!” He got popped out of existence before he could say anything else.

“HE’S STILL A WORK IN PROGRESS…”

“I’m… Uh, my name is-“ The doll started before stopping dead in her tracks. With a low voice, she added, “I can’t… seem to remember my name.”

“THAT’S OKAY! WE’LL JUST HAVE TO COME UP WITH A NEW ONE!” Caine spoke energetically, unaware of the girl’s growing uneasiness.

“How about Raggedy Ann?“ Kaufmo's comment was meant more as a joke than as a serious suggestion.

“[ERROR] [COPYRIGHT INFRINGEMENT DETECTED] [SIMILAR NAME AVAILABLE: RAGATHA]” Everyone in the circus covered their ears with their hands at the loud, static noise Caine emitted. Except for Wiggle. Again, no hands. “HOW ABOUT THAT?”

“Ragatha. I think that’s a lovely name. Don’t you, dear?” Queenie gestured towards the doll, who responded with a not very enthusiastic nod, still clearly puzzled. “Why don’t we show her around, Caine?”

“WHAT A FANTASTIC IDEA, YOUR HIGHNESS! COME ALONG NOW, RAGATHA!” He grabbed her arms to teleport her, earning a terrified whimper from the girl.

Queenie stopped him just in time. “Hold on. Perhaps this time we could do it the old-fashioned way?” She elaborated once Caine only blinked in response. “By walking?”

Kinger almost sighed in relief when he released her arm and went back to floating five feet above them. “OH! WELL, THAT’S CERTAINLY LESS CONVENIENT, BUT I SUPPOSE WE CAN DO THAT.”

Queenie turned to the other characters. “Would you like to join us?”

“No, thank you. We’ve had enough for today.” Kaufmo answered.

“Good luck, newbie!” Socks added on the way out.

“Uh, thanks?” Ragatha murmured awkwardly, still on the floor. Kinger approached her and extended a hand. She simply stared at the detached glove with a confused expression. “You have no arms…”

“Not really. It’s not ideal, but it works.”

Fortunately, Ragatha took his hand and stood up on shaky legs. Once she made a move to step forward, she nearly stumbled once again, but Kinger caught her with his other hand.

“Careful now. Try to distribute your weight.”

Despite herself, Ragatha returned an unsure smile and attempted to move once more. With the added support, she found it much easier. After a few moments, she’d already gotten the hang of it, though she kept her hands on Kinger’s detached ones. Still, she’d managed quite quickly. Certainly much faster than the married couple; learning to walk while being a chess piece with a base for feet was just as challenging as it sounded.

“YOU HUMANS SURE LOVE TO TAKE YOUR TIME.”

Kinger glanced at Ragatha once again to make sure she got it and answered, “We’re coming!”

Being realistic, the tour shouldn’t have taken more than twenty minutes. With Caine as a guide, however, it felt like it’d taken much more. A full day, to be exact. Why, he wasn't sure, because at the same time Caine had moved overwhelmingly fast. Kinger wasn't sure how much longer Ragatha could withstand it.

“AND LASTLY, WE HAVE YOUR SLEEPING QUARTERS, WHERE YOUR OWN CUSTOM ROOM AWAITS!”

“My own room?” Ragatha repeated.

“Actually, Caine.” Queenie said at the same time. “I was wondering if perhaps Kinger and I could show her the room. After all, you must be tired after such an amazing adventure today.”

Kinger recognized her tactic. By flattering the ringmaster, she was aiming to get what they wanted. Worked like a charm.

“OH! WELL!” Caine blushed. “YOU SAID THAT, NOT ME!”

“Have a good night, Caine.”

“NIGHT, YOUR MAJESTIES!” He bowed respectfully. “AND GOOD NIGHT TO YOU TOO, NEW HUMAN. I’M SURE WE’LL GET TO KNOW EACH OTHER VERY WELL IN NO TIME.”

“Um, sure. Good night.” She replied awkwardly.

With the AI gone, the two chess pieces heard the doll let out an involuntary sigh of relief, then quickly grew embarrassed, as if she hadn’t meant to do it out loud.

“Don’t mind him. Caine might be a bit eccentric, but he means well.” Said Queenie. “Ready to have a peek inside your room?”

Ragatha took a look at her own smiling face painted on the door. The expressions did not match.

“Okay…”

When they opened the door, they found what he’d kinda been expecting. The room was packed with dolls of all kinds, from plush toys to delicate porcelain figures. At the center stood a plush king-sized bed, draped with blue curtains. The room seemed entirely crafted from soft materials, with even the walls feeling plush to the touch. Kinger glanced over to see Ragatha's reaction.

But the ragdoll was not looking at her room. 

There was a large mirror adorned with flowers hanging on the wall, which he hadn't noticed before.

She was completely lost in the reflection. Her pupil was moving unceasingly, her hand reaching up as if to confirm that was really her, though her brain was finding it difficult to understand. Body dysmorphia in its purest, rawest form.

“Well, dear! What do you think?” He placed a hand on her shoulder, gently redirecting her attention away from the mirror.

“Huh?”

“Your room! Is it to your liking? If there’s something you don’t like, you can always ask Caine to make some adjustments.”

“It’s… okay…” Kinger could tell that was a lie, and she knew Queenie did as well. “Look, this has been a really lovely day,” another lie, “and I appreciate you showing me around, but… I really need to leave now.”

“Oh, that’s perfectly fine. You don’t have to stay in your room if you don’t want to.”

Ragatha shook her head. “I mean this game. I need to leave it now.” She said with the most assertive voice she’d used all day.

Kinger and Queenie exchanged a knowing glance. They’d given her enough time. The longer they took to remove the band-aid, the more painful it would be. Without a word, Queenie reached out and took Ragatha's hands, guiding her to the bed and sitting them both down atop it.

“I’m sorry. There is no way out. This is your new life, and this,” she signaled towards the room, “is your new home. I wish I could change that, but I can’t.”

Her good eye widened slightly as she took on the information. She shook her head. “But- I need to go back.”

“It’s not so bad once you get used to it!” Kinger said. “We have exciting adventures to keep us entertained, along with other perks of digital life. Like, no taxes! You youngsters loathe those, don't you?” At least he believed they did. He didn’t recall much from the real world nowadays.

This, naturally, did little to ease the girl’s mind. “No, you don’t understand. I can’t stay here, I need to go back. I left-“ She cut herself off. They waited for her to keep going, but she went silent instead. 

“I’m truly sorry…” Queenie’s eyes were full of sorrow, empathy.

“No… No, this can’t-“ She looked with pleading eyes at Kinger, begging him to contradict her. He didn’t. “I can’t…” Ragatha hid her face in her hands and made herself smaller. 

Breaking down was a crucial step in adapting to this digital life—it allowed for the release of all the negative emotions that had been pent up in one's body. It looked like that was what she was about to do right now.

Instead, once she spoke again it was with unnatural ease. “Thank you for everything today. I need to be excused.”

Queenie seemed as surprised by her reaction as he did. She lowered her head respectfully nonetheless. “Of course, dear. We’re here if you need anything.”

Ragatha nodded, but she wasn’t there anymore. He could tell from her expression. She’d entered a dissociation state as she accompanied them to the door, closed it behind them, and disappeared inside.

“Do you think she’ll be okay?”

Kinger knew exactly what she meant. Not everyone survived the first night.

“The first day is always the hardest. But she’s a strong young lady, I can tell.”

Queenie nodded slowly, visibly more at ease. He was grateful that she trusted his judgement, even if he couldn’t understand why. He wasn’t always the most reliable character. But what he had observed in Ragatha was true. Her interior was stronger than what her exterior suggested. 

He could only hope that this time he was right.

Chapter Text

They didn’t see Ragatha for the rest of the week. Or the one after it. 

Caine had wanted nothing less than to barge into her room and ‘kindly convince’ her (force her) to join an adventure. Kinger and Queenie talked him out of it. Sometimes, all you need is a few days to yourself to really gain a grasp on the situation. Everyone handles things in their own way.

But after two weeks with no response, they were starting to get worried. They would increase their trips to her door, reminding her that they were there for her. She never replied.

She hadn’t abstracted, at least. Late at night, long after the day’s adventure had ended, they could hear soft, plushy steps in the hall, seemingly to go try to find a nonexistent exit. However, these steps seemed to decrease each day, and by the third week, they stopped completely.

She’d given up. And that was dangerous.

On the forth week, Queenie knocked softly against the door.

“Ragatha, dear? Are you okay?”

The sniffles stopped, as usual. They waited for a response, but none came. By this point, they would get the hint and leave her alone. Not this time.

“Look, we’ve tried to give you space, but we’re genuinely worried. It can be risky to spend too much time alone with your thoughts in this place...” Of course, no one had explained to her what 'abstracting' meant yet. This could either motivate her to leave her room or further worsen her situation. They didn't want to risk finding out which one it was.

When they received no reply, the king piece decided to take a different approach. “Ragatha, it’s me, Kinger. Say, have I ever told you the story of when Queenie and I first arrived here?“

Queenie seemed confused by the change of topic, but still answered on her behalf. “Considering the brief duration of our conversation the other day, I doubt you’ve had the chance.”

“Well, it’s certainly an interesting story. We were the first, you see. There was absolutely no one else when we arrived. Except for Caine, of course, though he had just,” he made a ‘pop’ sound with his non-existent mouth, “come into existence. We were lost and confused, but with Queenie by my side, and me by hers, we managed. Soon after, others joined us, and we supported them the same way we had supported each other. That's why they started calling us the king and queen.”

Queenie smiled at that. Out of the two of them, she was the least inclined to embrace the queen title, as much as he knew it flattered her.

“…I would’ve guessed it’s because of the chess pieces thing.”

A reply. It was soft and muffed, but it was a reply. 

“Huh. I suppose that also might’ve helped.”

“It’s nice to hear your voice, dear. How are you holding up?” Asked Queenie, leaning closer to the door.

“I’m…” Her voice was hoarse, as if she had been crying or was still crying. “Does it really get easier?”

“It does. That I can assure you. But it’s hard.” There was no other way to put it. “Especially at first. That’s why it’s so important to help each other.”

They heard a weary sigh, followed by footsteps. Then the door opened slowly.

The room was far messier than the last time they'd seen it. Dolls were strewn about, the bed sheets were tangled and disheveled, and the mirror was shattered. Ragatha sat on her bed, cradling a single baby doll in her arms. She looked as disheveled as the rest of the room. 

“I’m sorry, I have been incredibly impolite. I heard you every time you came to check in, I just didn’t want to burden any of you with…” she gestured towards herself, “…this.”

"Nonsense. If anything, you're bothering us more by hiding in your room all day." Hm. That came out wrong. He could tell from the way she withdrew further into herself, her expression filled with guilt.

“What Kinger means to say,” Queenie placed her hand on his shoulder, a silent ‘I’ll take it from here’, “is we don’t mind seeing you like this, as long as we can help you get better.” She navigated through the scattered dolls until she reached her bed.“May I sit?”

Ragatha scorched over to make space for Queenie. Kinger took the other side.

"Would you like to talk about it? Sharing always helps me."

Ragatha's fingers traced over the doll she was holding, lost in thought for a moment before speaking.

“I am not a ragdoll.”

“We know.” She simply said.

“But I can’t remember how I look, either. ‘Ragatha’ isn’t my name, it doesn’t sound right when you call me that. Yet… I can’t remember what it does sound like.” She shifted her hands to her own hair. “It’s frustrating. Being stripped away from everything I am, and not even knowing what everything I am is.”

Of course, they understood that. The loss of identity is one of the hardest things after being thrown into this purgatory. It's not just your body that changes; it's your own mind.

“And that’s not even what hurts the most.” Her attention went back to her lap, where the small doll was. “I left… something really important behind. I know I did, and I know it meant the world to me, I just can’t-” she hit her head with her closed fit, “remember-” again, “what it is.”

Kinger got a hold of her hands and gently moved them from her head. 

“None of that… please.”

She was back to crying, a new wave of tears wetting her already damp cheeks as her fabric skin absorbed them. “How can I mourn something so deeply when I don't even remember it?”

Kinger didn’t know the answer, so he just traced slow circles into the back of her hands with his thumb. As if the touch reminded her of physical comfort, she went in for a full hug. Kinger was slightly surprised, considering people usually go for Queenie, but he accepted it without hesitation.

“It's natural to grieve for what's been lost, even if the memories are elusive.” Queenie started. “Loss is more connected to our hearts than it is to our brains. We don’t always know, yet we feel. No matter how much we look like objects, that will always prove we’re humans.” And he knew that fact brought her peace, because the two of them had left something behind as well. “We can’t give you what you’ve lost, dear. What we can do is help you bring out the person that you still are inside, but only if you allow us to.”

Ragatha's cries intensified. She was finally letting it all out. While she had cried before, it was different with people around. This was a positive step forward.

When she finally stopped, she pulled away from Kinger and wiped away the remaining tears with her arm. “Thank you. I needed that.”

“Of course.”

“And I do want to.” She looked back at Queenie. “Get better, I mean. I want to find a purpose for being here.”

“I’m very happy to hear that. Perhaps you’d like to join us for today’s adventure?” She tried. That’s what they’d been hoping when they got here, for her to start establishing some sort of routine.

Ragatha thought for a moment. “I think I’d like that. It won’t be too crazy, right?”

“With Caine, you can never know.” Kinger didn’t lie. ‘Crazy’ and ‘Caine’ were two words that couldn’t really be separated.

“We can ask him to tone it down for today.” Queenie assured her. “He’ll be happy to see you. But first, I think we should fix this room a little bit.”

Ragatha blushed self-consciously. “Oh, it’s- Sorry, it’s fine, I can do it on my own.”

“Hush. Kinger loves organizing soft objects. Don’t you, dear?”

“I certainly do! You’re always welcome to visit our impenetrable pillow fortress, Ragatha. It’s very comfy.”

The doll gave him a smile of gratitude.

Between the three of them, it didn’t take them long to tidy up the place. The dolls were returned to their shelves, and the sheets were folded and neatly arranged on the bed.

Queenie grabbed the remains of the broken mirror from the floor and examined it. “I apologize, I don’t think I can fix this mirror. But you can always ask Caine for another-“

“No!” Ragatha suddenly raised her voice, then quickly covered her mouth with both hands, looking ashamed. “Sorry. I think my room works better without it.”

“As you wish.” 

Queenie stepped out of the room to dispose of the shattered mirror. Ragatha made a move to follow her.

“Just one more thing, Ragatha.”

She turned to the king piece with curiosity in her eyes. She looked much better now that her hair had been brushed and light had returned to her eye. Yet, he knew how fleeting mental tranquility could be in this place. 

There was something he had to make sure of. He moved closer and took her hands in his once more.

“I need you to promise that you’ll seek mine or Queenie’s help if you ever need it. Don’t think you’re bothering us by doing so. After all, what are monarchs for if not to serve their people?” 

That earned a chuckle from Ragatha, though she still seemed unsure. 

“I mean it. You don’t have to be alone in this.”

When they locked eyes, he knew she couldn’t see a trace of deception in his gaze, from the way she smiled and muttered her next words.

“I promise.”

She did uphold her promise. For the first few years, at least.

When Jax got trapped not long after Ragatha, she joined them in their attempts to get him to open up. He had been much harder to get through than her, and that was saying something. Despite being a child—and they could tell from the way he acted since the moment he arrived—he concealed his negative feelings surprisingly well. Though, while Ragatha had internalized these feelings, he would let them out at the expense of the other characters. Pranks, at times hurtful, became a regular occurrence for him.

Still, they had patience, because that was the least anyone who got trapped here deserved. And their efforts did pay off. He was starting to trust them more—slowly, very slowly, but he was.

Queenie’s abstraction was a low blow for everyone. 

All the progress they’d made with Jax completely disappeared. He became much more closed off than he ever had before, firmly believing that the reason for her abstracting was caring for others too much. No one managed to get it out of his head.

Wiggle and Socks abstracted shortly after. Whether the loss of the Queen was the reason, no one could say for sure. But it was hard to deny that it played a part.

Without her, Kinger was too lost to help himself, let alone anyone. He didn’t have the strength anymore. 

Like a successor to the throne, Ragatha stepped up when no one else would. 

At first, she seemed happy to help. She had always been quite the helpful young lady. There was a shift in their relationship. Kinger went from being her pillar of support to leaning on her for strength. He wanted to help her in return, but he had no energy left to do so.

Everything became a blur in the following years. Time seemed to blend together, memories intertwining. Most of the time, he was blissfully unaware of what was happening around him. Ignorance is bliss, or so they say.

But he had moments of clarity, too. And in these moments, he could see her slowly deteriorate. 

Being the one everyone relied on wasn’t easy, he would know. Yet, he’d never been alone. He’d had Queenie by his side. Ragatha had no one.

He knew he should be doing something. He was still the king of these people. They should be relying on him. She should be relying on him.

Ragatha would talk to him if only he tried. They would meet at the digital lake and have a nice cup of tea together. The three two of them always loved those. They would have a much-needed conversation about their opinions on Caine’s latest adventures, their small gossip, and their feelings that needed to be expressed. He would help her lighten some of her load. 

But he wasn’t strong enough. Not anymore. Not without his Queen.

He hoped someone else would step in. Notice she wasn’t doing alright and help her out before they lost her forever. 

Maybe the new jester would be the one she so desperately needed. 

For now, he could only hope.