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Nancy didn’t frequent parties, especially not the kinds that her friends liked to go to. It wasn’t even something she pretended to like. She simply could not wrap her mind around the appeal. But Robin and Steve asked very nicely. So she was sitting on a suspiciously stained couch in some college kid’s apartment.
Steve leaned his full body against the plush armrest on one side of the couch, repeatedly blinking his eyes. Nancy figured it was either because his eyes were watering from the amount of weed and booze he’d ingested, or, he thought if he blinked hard enough he could get rid of the revealing red stain on his eyes. Either way, he looked like an idiot.
Robin was laying flat on her back, using Nancy’s legs as a pillow and dangling her feet over the other arm rest. Her arm was resting at her side, clutching an open bottle of beer she had barely taken a sip of. Nancy’s fingers ran back and forth through the other girl’s soft hair, gently running her fingers along her scalp. Her other hand made sweeping motions over Robin's shoulder and upper arm. She hoped, if there was a higher power, they would forgive her for the way she was thinking about Robin in that moment.
Although they weren’t dating, there was a quiet understanding between them that they wanted each other. Their friendship was just slightly too suggestive to be platonic. They could not sit together without their bodies touching in some way, even if it was just their fingers under the table. When Robin needed to squeeze past her in a crowded space, she had picked up a habit of grabbing Nancy’s waist, sliding past, and whispering something in her ear involving the word “Baby,” (Nancy could never hear the full sentence, just the pet name). Sometimes, in public, if a guy flirted with Nancy, Robin would grab her by the hand and stare at him until he got the picture. There was something there, both of them were just too scared to do anything about it.
Nancy sensed that Robin was about to fall asleep when a girl walked over to them.
“Robin!” The girl exclaimed, waving her hand like she was trying to swat a fly. The girl was no older than them, with short, ginger, hair.
Robin grunted before seemingly realizing who was talking to her. “Vickie!” She greeted back, sitting up. Her body was now fully removed from Nancy’s. Nancy didn’t like it.
"Nancy, Steve, this Vickie. She and I were friends in high school."
“How are you? I don’t think I’ve met your girlfriend yet-” The other girl, Vickie, asked while reaching to shake Nancy's hand
“Oh no, Nance isn’t my girlfriend.” Robin laughed out.
In that moment, Nancy began to play back every stolen glance, gentle touch, and hitched breath. How could Robin giggle at the idea of being in a relationship with her so openly? Nancy didn’t even listen to the rest of the conversation. She couldn’t. She felt like Robin had ripped her senses from her at that moment. She felt someone place their hand on her leg supportively for a second, it was Steve. He was grimacing. Even he, in his fucked up state, understood what had just happened.
---
Robin had followed Vickie through the crowd of people to grab herself and Steve another beer. The truth was, Vickie and Robin briefly dated in senior year, but had still remained friends. Seeing Vickie again, Robin barely even registered that she used to be attracted to her, there wasn't any way to want somebody else anymore.
Vickie stopped a a long table littered with half-full bottles of soda and liquor. She pulled a cup off of a stack and started pouring herself a vodka diet coke.
"If that girl isn't your girlfriend, she should be." Vickie said, shooting Robin a suspecting glance.
"It's complicated." Robin answered back, leaning down to search a cooler of drinks.
"What do you mean?" Vickie's hip popped as she stepped away from the table, eyebrows raised.
"It's just-" Robin sighed, "I'm actually in love with her and I'm 90% sure she likes me back. But there's 10% that's fully convinced she just thinks I'm kidding when I flirt and that we're just really close, platonic, bffs. So I've been waiting for her to make a move so I don't ruin our friendship."
"That's stupid." Vickie said after a moment.
"What?"
"That's stupid, Robin. She shut down completely when you told me you weren't dating. She obviously likes you." Vickie was almost laughing at Robin's inability to read signals, "When I walked over she was literally holding onto you like you were gonna poof away."
Robin had noticed that. Nancy had a habit of not realizing just how tightly she would hold Robin. When they held hands, Robin's fingers would turn purple. If Robin's arm was around her shoulders, Nancy's arm was around Robin's waist, tightly wound like she was carrying something she didn't want to drop. It never bothered her, though, how Nancy was so protective.
Vickie continued to talk, "Just tell her, Robin. Tonight."
"How?"
"Leave with her, do not do it here, take her to a special spot, and talk to her, goddammit." Vickie explained, like it was obvious. Robin had no idea how to do that, even with direction.
"And Robin," Vickie continued after a brief pause, "I'm really happy for you."
Robin smiled at her, before departing back to Nancy and Steve.
---
When Robin returened, without her friend, Nancy stood up immediately. “I’m calling an uber, I want to go home.”
Robin filled the space around her, grabbing her hand, any remnants of the alcohol jolting from her body. She started listing out multiple, independent, thoughts, “Are you okay? I’ll drive you. Steve, are you ok if we leave?”
Steve just nodded at them, his lips pressed together in discomfort.
Nancy didn’t have the energy to fight, so she let Robin lead her to the exit. She waited by the side of the car while Robin grabbed her door for her and sat in silence as she slipped into the driver’s seat. After pulling out of the parking spot, Robin went so far as to loop their hands together on the center console.
“Are you ok?” Robin asked again.
Nancy didn’t answer her.
"Nance?" She asked again.
Nancy took her hand away from Robin's. “Do you find the possibility of being with me funny?” Nancy asked, straight faced. She was stoic. She was angry.
“What, no!? What are you talking about?” Robin raised her voice, instantly veering off to the side of the road and shifting the car to park.
“When that girl called me your girlfriend, you laughed.” Nancy didn’t look at Robin while she spoke, just stared forward.
“Well-”
“So why did you laugh?” Nancy pried, causing Robin to sigh in frustration.
“Well, Nance, you’re not my girlfriend. Are you!?” Robin rubbed her temples with her fingers, looking uncharacteristically upset.
Silence. They never fought, they didn’t know how to fight.
“Oh.” Nancy said, continuing to focus her eyes in front of her.
“I didn’t mean it in a bad way. We’ve just playing this game for months and-”
“Game?!The game where you flirt with me constantly and conveniently forget to tell me for months that you’re just kidding?” Nancy was livid, her voice raising steadily.
“I’m not kidding at all! I thought that was obvious. I have been so patient waiting for you to be ready to make a move back.”
“What?”
“Of course I want you, Nance. There is not a single person who meets you and doesn’t want you. But I’ve been waiting until I knew you wanted a relationship. Until I was sure you were ok with a relationship with a girl. Not just girls, I mean, but with me."
“Oh.” Nancy didn’t know what to say.
“I laughed because I was nervous, that’s it. Or you didn't like me back, I didn't want to give you the wrong impression ”
They sat there without speaking for a few minutes. Nancy still couldn’t find the words to fill the space, so she just reached up to tuck Robin’s hair behind her ears, allowing her to see her face fully.
Robin finally spoke again, “Do you even want to be my girlfriend?”
“Of course I do.” Nancy responded softly.
“Why?”
“Because you’re you, there’s not a single person who meets you and doesn’t want you." She took a deep breath, "I would do anything to make you mine.”
“So next time someone asks if you're my girlfriend, I won’t have to correct them, right Wheeler?" Robin spoke through her forming smile.
“Well, me personally, I’m gonna tell them before they even get the chance to ask.”
Robin placed her hand on Nancy's cheek, her strong calluses causing Nancy's breath to hitch. “Can I kiss you?” She asked
“I’d be disappointed If you didn’t.” Nancy responded before Robin swooped in to lock their lips.
The kiss was sweet, but Nancy could feel the passion in how Robin moved her lips. There was a balance between soft, gentle, care, and pent-up, fiery, desire. They existed in the embrace, letting it consume them before separating for air.
“One more thing,” Nancy said, whispering like she was telling a secret.
“Yeah?”
“Call me baby more often, ok?”
Robin leaned in, close to Nancy’s ear so the tree’s and empty houses wouldn’t be able to hear, “Whatever it takes to keep you, baby.”