Archive of Our Own

It’s bad enough that Clarke’s mom is forcing her to go on this trip, she’s just gotten the carving tools she needs to finish her latest piece, but now Miller will not shut up about Bellamy Blake.

Miller and his boyfriend Monty are obsessed with him which is weird because he’s a total teeny bopper artist who writes songs meant for teenage girls. Bellamy Blake is not a terrible singer, Clarke just doesn’t see the appeal.

“He’s hot, Clarke,” Miller said one day when he and Monty were trying to get her on their Bellamy Blake bandwagon. “You’re bi you can appreciate him with us.”

“JFK was hot too, I don’t see you obsessing over the Bay of Pigs,” she shot back.

“You just hate everything that I love.”

“No I hate it when you blast his music at two in the morning when I’m trying to sleep.”

Miller shrugged, “Not my fault that when my dad and I moved in they gave me the room right next to yours...”

She glared at him and threw a kneaded eraser at his head. “You are the worst step brother ever.”

So Clarke really doesn’t mind the vacation part, Miller’s grandma is possibly the nicest lady that ever walked the earth. She just really doesn’t want to spend a whole week running around L.A. looking for Bellamy Blake. Because she knows that Monty has made a list of places he might be and she and Miller will have to go to every single one of them.

The whole drive from Tenino to L.A., Miller makes her listen to all three of Bellamy Blake’s albums. He even bought one of those headphone splitters so they didn’t have share one pair.

The music isn’t that bad, although the progression from his first album to the third is something Clarke definitely appreciates.

Most of the songs are faster songs that girls can dance to at slumber parties, and she can’t really help herself from tapping her foot on the floor of the car.

After they stop for lunch, Miller hands Clarke her pair of headphones and she pulls her sketchbook out of her bag. She had already started a drawing of a lion (Jasper and Monty came over the other night and insisted they watch the Lion King), and the bumps in the road along with the upbeat music has the face of the lion surrounded by... Abstract something, that’s for sure. She adds a crown on the lion’s head once the background is done. It will make Jasper happy when she texts him a picture later. Monty will probably be happy too, but it’s not a selfie with Bellamy Blake so it may be bittersweet to him.

They drive through the night because Abby Griffin will not stay in some three star hotel along I-5. She would never say it in such words, but Clarke knows her mom. So her mom and Miller’s dad switch off between driving and sleeping. And while the Griffin-Miller family might be too good for motels, they are not too good for gas station coffee. Miller and Clarke may go a little overboard when they make a stop at ten at night. Clarke got a bag of lime hot cheetos, a bag of peach rings, a liter bottle of blueberry lemonade, and a blue raspberry ring pop. Miller went for a can of original pringles, a bag of sour gummy bears, a red gatorade, and he got a blue raspberry ring pop too because when he saw Clarke grab one he just couldn’t resist.

They take an awkward selfie at 11:30 of them sticking their bright blue tongues out while the flash goes off, blinding them.

Miller may annoy Clarke a lot, like when he leaves his backpack right in front of the door for her to trip on, or when he takes the AUX cord in her car to play Bellamy Blake, but he’s pretty good as far as step brothers go.

It’s almost two in the morning when they finally make it. They go in through the garage and try to be as quiet as possible so they don’t wake anyone up. The house only has three bedrooms, so Clarke and Miller will have to share. This could normally end in a huge fight (Miller would yell at Clarke to turn the brightness down on her phone because he is trying to sleep, Clarke would throw a shoe at Miller to get him to stop snoring), but they’re both so tired it doesn’t even matter.

There is a knock at their door the next morning at nine o’clock and they both groan before Grandma Miller (that is what she insisted Clarke call her) announces that breakfast is ready. Seven hours of sleep is admittedly more than they would get on a school night, but it’s spring break so they need at least twelve hours.

But the smell of pancakes drifts into the room and they know they have to get up. Clarke scrapes her hair into a ponytail while Miller slips on the pair of fuzzy socks Clarke got him for his brithday.

“Race you,” he says when he gets to the bedroom door.

“No fair you got a head start!” Clarke exclaims as she follows after him.

He dashes down the stairs with her hot on his trail, but the landing is hardwood floor and his socks cause him to slide to the side.

“Take that sucker!” Clarke says as she runs ahead of him.

She throws her arms up when she gets to the dining room and hears Miller groan as he enters just seconds after her.

“Success!”

“I can’t even say you cheated...”

Clarke snorts, “Yeah cause you were the one to cheat.”

The adults are all staring at them with amused expressions as they sit down at the table.

“So what are you kids planning to do today?” Grandma Miller asks them.

Miller stands to grabs two mugs from the cabinet and gets himself and Clarke a cup of coffee. “I don’t know... Sightseeing?” he shrugs.

When he sits back down, his phone buzzes. So does Clarke’s.

It’s a text from Monty in the group chat he and Miller set up called ‘BLAKERS!!1!’. They’ve told Clarke that this is what Bellamy Blake’s fans are called. She thinks it’s a play off the Lakers... She’s not really sure. Then again she’s never really been a fan of an artist who had fans that gave themselves a name.

The text is a link to a tweet which links to an article about a party Bellamy Blake is reported to be performing at tonight along with the message you guys have to find a way to get into this club and get a video of him performing from Monty.

Clarke replies that it’s an under 21 club, so they shouldn’t have a problem getting in. And Miller replies that they will definitely be going to the club.

you think they’ll let us go to a club in LA??? Clarke texts.

they’ll definitely let us if you’re going clarke. youre so boring and responsible that they’ll believe it, Miller sends back.

Clarke sighs and takes a bite of her pancakes.

“Do you kids ever put down those phones,” Abby says with a laugh.

“It was just Jasper freaking out about prom,” Clarke lies.

“Are you two planning to go?” Grandma Miller asks.

Miller laughs and shakes his head, “Well if Jasper wants to go, Monty will too and I will be along for the ride.”

“Which means I have no choice in the matter,” Clarke adds.

---

Clarke hates that it’s true, what Miller said. Their parents see her as the responsible one, the one who always does her homework and spends time reading in her room. Because she does. They just don’t know about the drinking games she plays with Raven or the joints she’s shared with Monty and Jasper. But it is a good excuse to get them the chance to go to this club.

So they leave before dinner when Grandma Miller hands them the keys to her car and after a chorus of ‘be safe’ follows them out the door.

Miller drives them to get a quick dinner which they eat in the car on the way to the club. When they get there, he parks in a ‘no parking between 6pm-5am’ spot and Clarke is pretty sure its almost eight in the evening...

“Dude you can’t park here,” Clarke states.

“I’m not parking,” Miller says. “Because you are going to stay in the car until after he performs and that’s not technically parking.”

“You just want me to sit here? While you go inside for who knows how long?”

“Pretty much, yeah. You don’t like him and if we park anywhere else we’ll be walking for blocks to get to the club.”

“Fine,” Clarke says with a roll of her eyes. “But now you’ll have to come with me to pick out a prom dress.”

Miller just gives her a glare before getting out of the car and crossing the street to get to the club. There is a huge line outside, but Miller manages to get inside by looking like a bodyguard. It’s pretty believable, her brother is extremely intimidating when he wants to be.

Clarke starts by checking her instagram feed, and twitter after that. She even tries to check tumblr, but she doesn’t have that great of service here so it’s mainly just grey boxes.

After Miller has been gone for an hour and a half, Clarke decides to go get him. She will not stay in this car any longer. She’ll go mad.

The bouncer at the front entrance looks angry and Clarke thinks she has a very small chance of making it past him into the club. There could maybe be a side entrance, or an employees only one, so she walks around the building until she find one.

She reaches for the handle just as the door flings open, right into her forehead. The force of the door sends her crashing to the ground. So now she’s hit her head twice and she has to blink a few times until she stops seeing double.

“Shit shit shit,” she hears someone say, the voice deep and quiet. A hand gently lands on the back of her head and another one is placed on her knee. “Are you okay?”

Clarke looks up to where the voice is coming from and she would laugh if her head didn’t hurt so bad. Of course Bellamy fucking Blake would hit her in the head with a door while Miller is inside waiting for a glimpse of this very pop star.

“I’m fine,” she mumbles, pushing his hand away.

She tries to stand, but ultimately fails and she hears Bellamy curse as he places his hands on her hips and helps her to her feet.

“Jesus Christ,” he says again.

“You know for a pop star you sure use a lot of words that would upset the parents of your fanbase,” she snaps, trying to send him a glare but she sways on her feet so the effect is lost.

“Yeah okay we need to get you to a hospital, I do not need a lawsuit on my hands.” Just then, a car pulls into the alley, the door flying open as a blonde guy with a creepy mustache jumps out.

“Oh no man, you are not bringing home another girl. They’ll be all over this...” the guy says.

“Shut the fuck up, Wick. She needs to go to the hospital. I hit her in the head with the fucking door.”

Wick sighs and throws Bellamy a set of keys, “I’ll hold them off, go.”

Bellamy ushers her to the passenger seat and helps her inside. Her head is already starting to feel better, but now the pain has moved to her stomach.

“Are you gonna puke, you look green. Like literally. Please don’t puke in the car,” Bellamy says.

“Just shut the fuck up and let me breathe,” Clarke groans. She closes her eyes until the nausea passes. “Fuck, my brother is in the club. I have the keys.”

“Wick!” Bellamy calls. “Go give these to her brother. What does he look like?”

“He’s black, wearing a beanie with black jeans and a grey t-shirt. His name is Miller,” Clarke supplies before the car door is closed and Wick gives her a nod.

“I never got your name?” Bellamy says after a moment of driving in silence.

“It’s Clarke.”

“Well I’m Bellamy.”

“Yeah I know that, dumbass.”

He scoffs, “You know this is not usually how fan encounters go...”

“I’m not exactly a fan,” she tells him.

“Not a fan?” he says like it’s some impossible thing.

“My brother is the fan. Him and his boyfriend have a blog about you...”

“So, you’re not a fan?” he asks, looking to her when they get to a red light. He looks utterly shocked.

“Your music is fine, you have a good voice. But so do I, so does my friend Maya. Anyone can be a celebrity if they have the right lighting and enough makeup.”

“Wow... Bitter much?”

“You hit me in the head with a fucking door! I think I get to be a little bitter.”

He turns into the parking lot at the hospital, parking in the lot near the door but not giving the keys to the valet. “Okay, so be bitter.” With that he’s climbing out of the car and walking around to help her out and into the hospital. He pulls his hood up and asks a nurse for Dr. Nyko.

“What are you doing here, Bellamy?” someone asks from behind them.

They turn and Clarke is a little shocked by the man ushering her and Bellamy into a trauma room. He is really big and has very intense eyes. She assumes he is Dr. Nyko.

“Can you help her?” Bellamy asks, gesturing to Clarke where she sits on the bed. “I may have hit her in the head with a door... She could have a concussion or something...”

Dr. Nyko sighs, “You’re lucky Lincoln loves your sister so much.”

He does a few tests, telling Clarke she doesn’t have a concussion but she should get some rest and ice the bruise forming on her forehead.

And then Bellamy is rushing her back to his car and speeding out of the parking lot.

“So you have your own private doctor?” she asks, a hint of annoyance in her voice. She may be rich and her mom may be a bit of a snob, but Clarke has to draw the line somewhere.

“Dr. Nyko is the cousin of the guy who is dating my sister.”

“Octavia,” Clarke recalls.

“Thought you said you weren’t a fan,” he says with a smug grin.

“I’m not. I told you that my brother is.”

“He’s not like, creepy or anything is he?” Bellamy asks and Clarke has to laugh at that. Miller is pretty harmless unless you offend Monty, Jasper, or Clarke. He would defend Raven too but she doesn’t really need it.

“Relax, he doesn’t have a poster of you in his room that he makes out with or anything. His boyfriend just thinks you’re cute and dragged Miller down the rabbithole.”

“Cute, huh?” he says with a smirk.

Okay, Clarke has to agree. He is pretty attractive up close. His eyes give away his every emotion and his freckles are pretty cute.

“Don’t get too excited now.”

He’s still smirking as he turns his attention back to the road, “So where am I taking you?”

“My grandma’s house,” she says.

“Put the address into the GPS,” he instructs and she punches it into the screen on the dashboard.

They drive in silence for a while, Clarke letting her eyes close as she hold the ice pack to her forehead, until Bellamy starts frantically looking in the rearview mirror.

“Shit they’re following us,” he curses. “Alright, we need to make a quick detour.”

“What? Why?”

“If Bellamy Blake is reported going to some random house, all kinds of stories will be spun. So we’re going back to my house for a while, just until we lose them.”

“You’re kidding.”

“I wish I was, Princess.”

She sighs and rests her head against the headrest.

---

So Bellamy Blake’s house is fucking huge. And she knows big houses, she lives in one. But this is excessive. There is no way more than him and his sister live here, and he probably has more land here than her family does back in Tenino. And the decor is definitely what she would expect from a pop star, flashy. Her own house is pretty much the opposite of this. If they didn’t live in the house Clarke’s father built before she was born, the house might look a little something like this. But the couch in her living room is definitely not leather and where Bellamy has plush rugs that cover the floor, Clarke has plastic door mats where they leave their boots after they ride around on the four wheelers.

There is also a lot of people in Bellamy’s house. Why the hell would be bring her here if he was having some kind of party? She gets her answer when he grabs her hand and drags her up the stairs to a guest room.

“Just stay here for a minute. People have seen me here now and I need to make an appearance. I’ll take you home after that,” he says, walking towards the door.

“This is ridiculous,” Clarke says after he leaves.

This stuff does not happen to people like her. She has lived in Tenino her entire life and if she wants to go to Raven’s house or even to the nearest Target, it’s at least a half hour drive. The closest thing to a celebrity she’s ever met is the Mayor. And now she’s sitting on a California king bed inside Bellamy Blake’s house dodging the paparazzi. They’re so gonna make a lifetime movie about this. Especially after Monty and Miller kill her for not being here with her. Lifetime movies love a good twist like murder.

The sound of someone playing the guitar drifts up to the balcony and she steps out to see Bellamy on a chair by the pool, strumming away.

It’s kind of amazing, watching him play live. She’d kind of assumed his voice was at least a little autotuned on those songs Miller had her listen to, but his voice really is good. And this song is much softer than anything she’s heard from him.

And then he looks up at her while he’s singing and she nearly has a heart attack. The smile on his face is sincere and he’s sitting there, singing about how he’ll be her hero. And somehow, she believes him.

If your the one for me, like gravity I’ll be unstoppable

Yeah I believe in destiny

He sings that he could be everything she needs and she finds herself thinking that’s totally true.

When the song ends, he sets down the guitar and is forced to look away from her when people walk up to talk to him.

Clarke runs a hand through her hand and realizes that she it totally stupid. Bellamy is basically paid to make girls feel the way he just made her feel. He’s paid to come up with lyrics to make a girl feel special while still being generic enough to apply to whatever girl buys the track. And she doesn’t need a hero, she doesn’t need Bellamy Blake to save her and be her superman or whatever else he said in that stupid song. She just needs him to take her back to Grandma Miller’s so she can forget this ever happened.

She nearly jumps out of her skin when Bellamy comes back into the room. God why is she so jumpy?

“Come on let’s get you out of here,” he says.

She quickly walks right past him so he won’t see the blush turning her cheeks a lovely shade of red. He directs her to the garage where three different cars sit just waiting to be used.

“Jesus, you couldn’t have just one camaro so you had to buy three?” she scoffs.

“You knows these are camaros?” he asks, raising one eyebrow.

“I’m not an idiot. And besides my best friend is basically the best mechanic we have in town, I’d recognize Dodge Challenger if you had one of those.”

She gets into the car in the middle and he grabs the keys before getting in beside her, “Let’s hope they don’t follow us this time...”

She rolls her eyes, “Yeah, let’s hope.”

No one follows them this time and he drives her back to Grandma Miller’s in silence. She’s got a killer headache and just wants to go to bed. She hopes Miller won’t be snoring too loud. If he even made it back okay... Wow she is a terrible sister.

“Everything okay?” Bellamy asks.

“I never thought to check if my brother made it home alright...”

“Wick gave him the keys,” he tells her. “He texted me and said your brother got them. He also said your brother gave him a glare that made him fear for his life...”

“Yeah that’s Miller,” she says with a sigh. “I am so grounded if he tells them that he had to come home without me.”

“What’s it like to be grounded?” he asks.

“Seriously? You’ve never been grounded?” he shakes his head. “Well it sucks. Especially if I’m grounded right before I get to go to prom. Let me guess, you never went to prom either.”

“Never even went to high school. I just had a tutor.”

“Well you didn’t miss much...” she says as he pulls into the driveway.

She gets out of the car before he can say anything else and goes to put in the code to open the garage.

“I hope your head feels better,” he says, getting out of the car.

“Yeah whatever.” Her head most certainly does not feel better right now and she is still very bitter.

“I just wanted to apologize for everything. I feel like a dick.”

“Why does it matter?” she asks as the garage door creaks open. “Why bother with being polite when we’ll never see each other again?”

He scoffs and crosses his arms at his chest. Dang, he has nice arms... “I’m sorry if you’re still bitter but I’m not an asshole. I took you to the fucking hospital to make sure you were okay.”

“You only did that so I wouldn’t sue, which I wouldn’t by the way who actually does that?”

“Look you wouldn’t understand-”

“Oh I wouldn’t understand? I don’t understand how much your reputation means to you? How much it would suck if you were seen with me or people knew you helped me? No I think I do understand.” She turns around to head into the garage and hears Bellamy sigh as he gets into his car.  

She is almost at the door when she hears him run towards her and grab her wrist.

“They’re here,” he whispers like the paparazzi will be able to hear him from the street.

She rolls her eyes, “Well what do you want me to do? I don’t have a guest room for you to hide in.”

“Can I just stay in the garage until they leave?”

“Man you really don’t want to be seen with me.”

“Trust me, you don’t want to be seen with me either. The paparazzi will start asking all these questions that neither of us want to answer. So, garage?”

“Fine,” she relents. “But when I wake up in the morning you better be gone.”

“Gladly.”

He pulls his car into the garage with the lights off and Clarke shuts the door after him. She finds an old blanket on a shelf and throws it at him, throwing him one last glare before going into the house.

Thankfully Miller is already asleep so he won’t be able to grill her about where she’s been until tomorrow.

She puts on her headphones and turns on anything but Bellamy Blake.

---

When she wakes up the next morning, Miller is already up and doing something on his phone.

“Oh nice of you to finally come home, Clarke,” he says.

“I’m sorry, I just...” What can she even say? She can’t tell Miller that Bellamy Blake is asleep in the garage. That she spent most of the night being driven around by his favorite celebrity. “I just lost track of time.”

“Yeah well you’re lucky everyone was already asleep when I got back and I didn’t have to explain why I came back alone.”

“I am sorry,” she repeats.

“It’s alright, Clarke. You can be the irresponsible one this time. I won’t tell them,” he smirks.

“Breakfast?”

“Breakfast.”

They don’t race this time, but they wish they had. There is a huge plate of bacon and Clarke hip checks Miller out of the way to get to it first. There is no such thing as brother and sister when bacon is involved.

Clarke is smiling triumphantly as she takes her seat at the table.

“Where’s your hat, Miller?” David asks with a smile. He seriously rarely takes it off. Pretty much the only times he does is when he sleeps, when he showers, and when he’s hanging out with Monty.

“Oh I left it in the car,” Miller says. He stands from his chair and starts walking towards the garage.

After a beat, Clarke remembers that there is more than one car in the garage. She jumps up, running after her brother. “I’ll get your hat,” she says, standing between him and the door.

“You don’t even know where it is. You didn’t even drives back with me.”

He reaches for the door handle, pulling on it even as Clarke continues to block the door. He finally just shoves her aside, mumbling how weird she’s being.

Clarke doesn’t think she has ever been as relieved as she is in this very moment. Bellamy’s car is gone and the blanket is folded up and on the shelf where she had gotten it the night before. She follows Miller back to the kitchen once his favorite hat is back on his head.

They scarf down their breakfast before Miller looks at Clarke, studying her.

“Dude what is wrong with you?” she asks, flicking a piece of bacon at him.

“We’re going to the beach today,” he decides.

“Okay...”

“You’re really pale. We need to do something about that,” he tells her, going back to his food.

“Wow thanks, you’re such an A plus brother.”

“A nice tan would be great for prom.”

“Mmm I’m sure,” Clarke says. When he’s not looking, she grabs his phone, seeing a text from Monty.

try the beach today. the weather channel says you have perfect surfing weather and i desperately need a picture of Bellamy Blake surfing

Clarke huffs out a laugh and sets his phone back on the table.

Once they finish eating, they both go change into their swim suits. Clarke is almost 100% sure Bellamy will not be at the beach, but she’s hoping that once Miller stops moping they can actually have a good time. After she grabs her bikini, she passes Miller on her way to the bathroom. “You don’t care about my tan at all,” she accuses.

“Of course I do. I don’t want to show up to prom with my sister looking like a ghost. That’s what we have Jasper for.”

“I saw Monty’s text.”

“So what? I can care about your tan and Bellamy Blake at the same time. I can multi task.”

She rolls her eyes and walks to the bathroom without another word.

---

“You’ve got to be kidding me,” Clarke says under her breath as they get to the beach.

Miller doesn’t hear her and throws the car in park, climbing out and walking down to the sand without even waiting for Clarke.

She pauses a moment after she gets out of the car, trying to figure out if she can be having delusions from her adventures last night with a door. But nope, she is perfectly fine. And there, parked a few spaces down, is a very familiar camaro.

She scans the beach and sure enough, a very familiar hoodie is there too.

Why the fuck does he keep appearing in her life? She thought she was done with him!

But the universe hates her. So she walks down to the beach, standing behind the chair he’s sitting in before dropping her bag in his lap and sitting in the chair next to him.

“Hey asshole,” she says as a greeting.

“What are you doing here?” he demands, setting her bag down on the sand.

“Funny I was just going to ask the same thing,” she deadpans. “Why did you not just go home?”

“A few blocks from your grandma’s house they saw me.”

She sighs, “You have been a celebrity since you were fifteen and you still can’t deal with a few cameras snapping pictures?”

“You don’t know what it’s like, Clarke. They don’t just take pictures, they use them and manipulate them to make me look bad.”

“I can’t say I ever really want to know what it’s like...” she mumbles.

“Do you have a car here?” he asks.

“Yeah why?”

“I can drive it around for a while until they notice I’m not at the beach and leave. Then I can come back and give you the keys.”

“And what am I supposed to tell my brother if he wants to leave and we mysteriously don’t have a car?”

He fishes in his pocket and produces a set of keys, “You can take my car as long as you bring it back.”

“Not gonna happen,” she says, crossing her arms at her chest. His eyes dart down to her breasts for a second and she feels pretty good about herself. “I’m going with you.”

“Am I that irresistible, Princess?” he smirks.

“Sorry but no, I just want to make sure you don’t do something stupid with my grandma’s car.”

“Then let’s go,” he says as he stands. He offers her his hand and pulls her up as well.

Clarke snatches is keys from his hand, “I have to leave these with my brother.”

He nods and she walks over to where Miller dropped his bag, replacing their grandma’s keys with Bellamy’s.

“Time to go asshole,’ she says, grabbing Bellamy’s wrist and dragging him back to Grandma Miller’s car.

“ This is your grandma’s car?” he asks, a look of disgust on his face.

“It was her husband’s car,” she pats him on the back before walking over to the passenger side. “Still runs though.”

She hears him grumble a bit before he open the door and starts the car. He reaches into his pocket and pulls out pair of sunglasses, telling her to put them on. Then he pulls his hood down even more before pulling the drawstrings to tighten it around his face.

“You look ridiculous,” she tells him.

“I’d rather look ridiculous than be seen by the paparazzi.”

He speeds out of the parking lot as Clarke sends a text to Miller. She tries to be as vague as possible, saying she went off with some guy but she left the keys with the rest of his stuff. He replies almost immediately and Clarke wonders if he was sitting on the beach texting Monty.

don’t get pregnant ;)

i’ll try. but you’ll help me take care of the baby if i do?

definitely. monty and jas will help too, they love babies

“What’s with the smile?” Bellamy asks. “You’re usually scowling at me.”

“It’s nothing,” she replies, shoving her phone back into her bag. “So what now? We drive around for a few hours? Gee Blake you sure know how to show a girl a good time.”

“Have you been anywhere since you got here? Other than my house and the club?”

“Nope we just got here yesterday at like two in the morning. We haven’t done much of anything.”

“Why did you get here at two in the morning that sounds horrible?”

“We drove here from Tenino, and we left the house at nine in the morning.”

He looks mildly horrified and definitely confused so she laughs and pats his thigh.

“Tenino is in Washington, it’s near Olympia. Wouldn’t expect a big star like you to know about such a small town,” she laughs again when the look on his face goes from confused to thoughtful.

“Well it’s been decided then,” he says, a big grin on his face that makes her heart flutter. “You are getting the grand L.A. tour from none other than Bellamy Blake.”

“A dream come true.”

“You know it, Princess.”

His grin becomes mischievous and she raises an eyebrow in question.

So he drives them all over town, taking pictures on a disposable camera that he bought her.

“Are you serious?” she asked him when he showed her the camera. “I didn’t even know these still existed.”

“It’s vintage,” he explains.

“Oh vintage, huh? So we’re hipsters now?”

“You are in L.A., Princess.”

“Alright you do have a point there.”

They take some ridiculous selfies pretty much everywhere they go. He snaps one after he buys them some ice cream and smears some on her nose. She’s pretty sure she looked murderous in that one. They take one in front of the Hollywood sign even though the thing looks so small from where they stand, he tells her that they can’t get any closer unless they’re on horseback. Which... Is pretty much the weirdest thing she’s ever heard. And to get him back for the ice cream picture, Clarke takes one where she is kissing his cheek because, why not. She won’t see him again after today, and the way he ducks his head afterwards and the tips of his ears turn red, it’s pretty great. She just made Bellamy Blake blush. She is clearly winning at this thing called life.

They get back in the car a while later when he figures the paparazzi have given up their search at the beach. But like every other time they’ve been in the car together, they won’t have it that easy.

This time she spots them, the giant black van following them.

“How do they even do this? How do they know I’m driving this piece of shit?” Bellamy groans.

“Hey this car is not a piece of shit. Just because she’s not Bumblebee material doesn’t mean she’s a wreck,” she tells him. “Just turn off somewhere. Maybe we can lose them on a dirt road or something...”

She’s grasping at straws here, but hiding out at Bellamy’s house all night doesn’t seem all that appealing the second time around.

He turns down a road that’s probably not even a road, but they manage to lose one of the vans that were following them. He makes a sharp left turn and they lose the last one.

“Thank god,” she says, relieved.

“Well don’t sound too happy to get rid of me, Princess.”

“I’ve had enough Bellamy Blake to last me a lifetime,” she says.

“Fair enough. But how do we get back to a real road now?”

“Shit...” she sighs. “And I don’t have any service here. Thanks for nothing Siri!”

“Maybe it just loops back around...” he tries.

Suddenly the car stops and she sees him stomp on the gas pedal a few times before she hears the tires spinning. She opens her door and looks down, “Fuck we’re stuck in mud...”

He shifts the car into neutral, “Guess we gotta push it out.”

Clarke throws her bag out of the car, happy when it lands on the ground not covered in mud, before stepping out herself. She slips a little at first and somehow Bellamy is there to steady her. Her breath hitches as his arms pull her closer, and then he’s letting go and walking around to the back of the car. He doesn’t let go of her hand though...

“Ready?” he asks. She nods and tries to dig her feet into the ground so she doesn’t slip again as they push the car. “Alright push!”

The car moves about an inch before one of the tires falls even deeper into the mud. The whole car shifts to the side, causing Clarke to fall flat on her face.

“You’ve got to be kidding me,” she says to the sky as she rolls onto her back.

Her shirt is covered in mud as well as her shorts, and just about every other part of her is covered too. Bellamy chuckles before kneeling beside her and using his thumb to wipe away some mud off her cheek.

“This is the worst day of my life,” she says, pounding her fists into the mud.

“Well you look great.”

“Shut up, asshole.”

He stands up and offers her his hand. But of course the universe isn’t done fucking with her, so just as she gets to her feet, Bellamy’s slip out from under him and they both fall back down. She ends up on top of him and her body won’t let her move away. It seems that he can’t move either and he just looks at her like she has all the answers to solve the world’s problems.

A bird screeches somewhere to their left and that’s what breaks the spell. She scrambles to stand, grabbing her bag and walking back down the road.

“I’m sorry about the car,” he says, catching up to her.

“Yeah well, you’re not exactly my good luck charm...”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” he snaps.

She scoffs and shakes her head. He can’t be serious... “Well since I’ve met you, I’ve nearly gotten a concussion, and almost got in huge trouble with my parents for ditching my brother at the club. Not to mention he’s probably mad at me now even though he said it’s okay. But he’s been my brother since we were ten and I know he holds a grudge.”

“And that’s my fault?”

“Of course it’s your fault!” she screams. She wanted a normal trip. She wanted to spend time with Miller, laughing and joking around as they went around town looking for Bellamy Blake. She is beyond stressed out now and trying to find a way to make it all up to Miller because she cannot tell him about all this. She’s basically spent the entirety of this vacation with Bellamy Blake and keeping it from him. Him and Monty would never forgive her. And she cannot deal with Monty being upset with her. She’s not sure she could take that much heartbreak. “This is literally all your fault, Bellamy! If you hadn’t left the club right then, none of this would have happened! I would have been hanging out with my brother, having a good time! But instead I’m hiding with you because you can’t be seen with a nobody like me!”

She turns away from him and keeps walking down the road. If a glare could start a fire, California would have to be evacuated.

“Well you’re no walk in the park, Princess!” he calls after her.

Clarke whips around to jab a finger in his chest, “Stop calling me that! My name is Clarke and you damn well know that!”

“You’re so goddamn snappy all the time! You think I want to be spending all this time with a stubborn girl who thinks she’s too good for me? Because I don’t. I have much better ways to spend my time.”

“So leave then!,” she yells as tears stream down her cheeks. “Walk away and go back to your fabulous life! I don’t want to be a part of it.”

She doesn't wait for his reaction, she doesn’t want that either. WIth her bag slung over her shoulder she keeps walking. She ignores his calls, he even uses her real name this time. When he grabs her wrist she yanks it away and keeps going.

“You need to stop,” he says, stepping in front of her.

She takes a step forward, daring him to push back. But instead he falls backwards and she hears a huge splash.

“What the fuck,” she says, stepping through the tall grass and seeing a small lake on the other side. She doesn’t even notice Bellamy until he grabs her wrist and pulls her into the water. She throws her bag aside at the last minute because, priorities. She cannot get her phone wet.

He splashes her and she jumps onto his shoulders to dunk him under the water.

“Real mature, Princess,” he sputters as he resurfaces.

“You’re the one who pulled me in,” she reminds him. She finds it hard to stay mad at him now that his dark curls are in his eyes and totally deflated as they drip water down his face. She pushes the hair on his forehead back so she can actually sees his eyes and her heart races as he catches her wrist and laces his fingers with hers.

For a moment he just stares at her, like he’s waiting for her to make the first move. Which she does of course because she is Clarke Griffin and she gets what she wants.

She wraps her arms around his neck as she presses her lips against his. His hand rests on the small of her back and the other cradles the back of her head. It feels like a movie honestly. The way the sun glitters off the lake as they get lost in each other. The quiet that surrounds them and is filled with her sigh as his hand goes down to her ass. Clarke has had sex lots of times but butterflies still go wild in her stomach when Bellamy cups her breast through the fabric of her bra. She arches into him and he starts kissing her jaw, her throat. She feels him leaving a mark on her neck and gently tugs on his hair until he gets the message and he’s kissing her again.

And then, just like that stupid fucking bird, the ring of her phone interrupts them. She reluctantly pulls away from him and grabs her phone from her bag. Of course it’s Raven calling her. Raven would be the one to cockblock her.

“What?” Clarke says a little too harshly.

“So I found a dress to wear to prom, but I wanted to know if we should coordinate colors or anything since you’re kind of my date,” Raven says. Of course Raven would cockblock her with a call about a prom dress.

“Jasper is my date,” Clarke shoots back.

“Yeah right. Anyways my dress is red so you should definitely go for something pink since you’re girly and shit.”

“When I get back we can go look for a dress for me to wear. And Miller has to come with us because I blackmailed him into it. But I have to go, you interrupted something really important and I hate you.”

“Love you too,” Raven chirps and Clarke hangs up the phone.

“Something really important huh, Princess,” Bellamy teases as he comes up behind her.

She shoves at his chest as she gets out of the water and starts walking again. “You coming or what?”

He chuckles before following her, “Where are we going?”

“We’re going to sit in the sun somewhere to dry off because I don’t plan on walking back to the beach all wet.”

He smirks at that and she just rolls her eyes.

“So who called you?” he asks. They’re laying down in the grass, squinting at each other because the sun is so bright.

“My friend Raven, she has been stressed about finding a prom dress since hates wearing dresses,” Clarke explains. “And she just has perfect timing.”

“I’ll say,” he laughs.

“It’s funny to me, that you’re worrying about adult things like selling enough records and meeting deadlines with lyrics, and I’m worrying about how I’ll do my makeup at my senior prom.”

“I wish all I had to worry about was prom... And I’m a guy so I wouldn’t even be worrying that much. I mean Troy Bolton sort of freaked and went a little crazy, but I think I’d be fine.”

She giggles and throws an arm over her face to cover it.

“What?” he asks.

“You’re only high school experience is High School Musical.”

“Is high school not like that?”

“Not at all. Although I am not in any way associated with the drama kids so who knows, maybe they’re having the High School Musical experience...”

“What other kind of kids are there?” he asks. “Other than drama I mean.”

“There is the soccer boys, who are very different than the soccer girls and I would know because I am on the soccer team. There’s the football guys who are mostly pretty nice even though in most high school movies they’re total dicks. There is also the science nerds which make up most of my friends-”

“Wait, you’re a soccer girl who is friends with science nerds?”

“Shocking, I know. But Miller is my brother and he’s probably one of my best friends, and his boyfriend Monty is like a mad chemist. So there is one science nerd. And then Monty’s best friend is called Jasper and he wears goggles constantly because he says he is ‘always ready for science’, so he is definitely a nerd. And then my other best friend, the one who called, she is going to be a mechanic, so she loves science too. She loves knowing how shit works.”

“Wow you have a lot of friends...” he says.

“Not really, it’s just the five of us,” she shrugs.

“Well I’ve got Wick who is a dick. I only keep him around because he’s been in this with me since the beginning and it feels wrong to just ditch him. Wick and my sister.”

“I’d be fine if it was just me and Miller...”

He sighs, “Octavia means everything to me. She’s the reason I do all this, to give her something better than what I had when I was her age.”

“Which is what?”

“Nothing... I had what I could fit in my backpack. I never set down my wallet because I didn’t know if my mom or one of her boyfriends would take something from it. Octavia is too young to remember any of it, but she loves all the attention she gets now so I think I’ve done a pretty good job.”

“That sucks,” she tells him, propping her head up on her arm.

“What? No pity?”

She turns to look at him, “Do you want pity?”

“No, no I don’t,” he chuckles. “I’m just used to getting it.”

“Now who’s bitter?” she asks, poking his side until he squirms.

“Ha ha, let’s laugh at Bellamy and all his irony,” he deadpans and she just smiles at him, warm and bright. “So what’s your sob story, Princess?”

“Well... My dad died when I was nine. I don’t remember him much, but the memories I still have are good. He got cancer when I was eight, I think. I still don’t know all the details. But my mom convinced him to hide it from me, she said it was only stage one, that they didn’t need to scare me. And apparently he was in remission for a few months before it got really bad. I didn’t even know why he died until I was thirteen. And my mom wasn’t even the one to tell me. My stepdad let it slip because he assumed I already knew.”

“Dang... Your mom is kind of a bitch. Can I say that?” he asks, a worried look on his face as if he had offended her.

“I say it a lot, so you can too. What she did was wrong, but she was only looking out for me... I’m still bitter though.”

“Bitter buddies,” he says, holding up his hand for a high five.

“How are two 18 year olds this bitter?”

“I’m 19 actually,” he tells her. “My birthday was last month.”

“How did I not know this? I feel like I should have known this because of my brother,” she says with a laugh.

“It’s okay, you can get me a present later.”

She smacks his shoulder and laughs once more, “You wish.”

“Should we start trying to find the road?” he asks after a moment.

“Yeah, that’s probably a good idea,” she agrees.

After a while they do actually find their way back to the road. And when Clarke gets service again, she finds a bunch of texts from Miller asking what the hell is going on and why he suddenly has Bellamy Blake’s car keys. He also left her a voicemail that said he felt wrong basically stealing Bellamy Blake’s car so he just took a cab and left the keys tucked underneath the lifeguard’s giant chair.

“It’s not that bad if I can’t find the keys,” Bellamy tells her with a shrug. “I have two more just like it.”

At that, she playfully smacks his chest and giggles.

They get back to the beach about an hour later and Bellamy grabs her wrist to stop her, pulling her behind a wall of huge rocks.

“So you know what has to happen now, right?” he says, giving her a level look.

She really doesn’t understand the question. “What do you mean?”

“You can’t tell anyone about this, not even your brother. You know how this would go if people find out this.”

“Excuse me?”

“It would be a shit storm, Clarke. I don’t need anyone asking questions.”

“You don’t need anyone asking questions,” she says and she’s so angry she’s calm.

“You have to understand that the paparazzi will do anything to make a buck, and I can’t have that.”

She scoffs, feeling the calm and anger drip away and getting replaced with tears. “Right. Because that’s the only reason you’ve spent any time with me. I’m just a small town girl who would make you look bad to the press, and you need me to stay hidden for your benefit. It’s not like I have any feelings...”

As she turns to walk away she curses herself for being so fucking stupid. She told herself in the beginning yesterday that they wouldn’t see each other again when it was all over. She was an idiot believing that there was any other way this could end.

“Clarke wait,” he says. A small flicker of hope sparks in her, like somehow he’s not as big of an asshole as she thinks. “The camera. I need it back. I trust you not to post the pictures or anything I just- I need to be sure.”

She digs around in her bag to find the stupid disposable camera and throws it at his chest.

“Take it!” she hisses. “I don’t want it anyways. I don’t need that much asshole taking up space in my bag. And I never want to see those pictures again.”

She walks away again and this time, he doesn’t stop her. She doesn’t know if she wants him to stop her again, she doesn’t know if it would have been better that way. She storms off the beach, frantically wiping tears off her cheeks, he doesn’t deserve her tears. So she tells herself not to cry. He is just some jerk who used her. And she shouldn’t be surprised.

After she gets into a cab, she texts Miller asking where he is.

chilling at the house. mom and dad went with grandma to the botanic gardens...

well i’m on my way back so order us a pizza and get the ice cream out of the freezer. the chocolate syrup too i need sugar

waste a lot of energy not getting pregnant???

something like that

She makes it through the pizza, she makes it through the ice cream, she makes it through a movie and telling their parents lies about how they spent the day. She makes it through Miller’s questioning as they sit in their room later that night. But as soon as he falls asleep, she can’t make it any longer.

The blankets won’t get out of her way fast enough. Her feet won’t carry her to the bathroom fast enough. She can’t lock the door behind her fast enough.

She sits on the floor with her back against the door, picking at the rug under the sink as tears roll down her cheeks. She doesn’t know where all these tears come from and she might be dehydrated when she’s done. But everything sucks and she pretty much hates her life right now so she doesn’t bother to worry about that.

It’s a few minutes before she starts shaking with sobs. She does nothing to stop herself. It would be better to get it all out now so she can appear normal and not devastated for her family for the rest of the trip. Just three more days and she’ll be home, locking herself in her room with a giant bag of lime hot cheetos and a glass of chocolate milk. Classic break up food.

Except that this isn’t even a break up. She wasn’t dating Bellamy. He just broke her heart.

She had Finn who made her the other woman, and had the nerve to tell her he still loved her after all the pain he’d caused. She had Lexa who made her feel good in all the right ways, but left her with one text saying they were both better off without each other. And now she has Bellamy, a guy who used her for a good time and literally dumped her on the side of the road when he was finished with her. For some reason it hurts the worst with him. She's not fifteen and stupid like she was with Finn. She's not vulnerable and desperate for attention like she was with Lexa. She opened up to Bellamy and thought he had done the same with her. They had fun together, but she's nothing. Just some rich girl from the middle of nowhere that gave him an escape from reality for a few hours.

To him she is nothing, she is another thing he'll have to cover up with the press. They'll all forget about her soon enough and she won't matter. She never mattered to him anyways. But he mattered to her. She believed him. Believed that he was good. But he's not. He's just another broken heart now.  

When she sees the sun peeking up and casting a warm orange glow in the bathroom, she jumps into the shower, hoping the hot water can wash away any trace of her puffy and red eyes or the hoarseness in her voice.

She has breakfast with her family and lets Miller drag her around for the day. And repeat. The next three days are exactly the same and if anyone notices the blank expression she wears, they don’t bring any attention to it. Which is good, she doesn’t want to talk about it. Bellamy deserves no credit, he doesn’t deserve to be talked about by her. He doesn’t control how she feels, and he won’t. But she still feels like shit anyway.

Her parents pack up the car early one morning, and they head out only after Grandma Miller gives them some breakfast.

Once Clarke is in the car, she declines Miller’s offer at sharing music again. Just the mention of his music makes it hard for her to breathe for a minute. She just puts on her own headphones and blasts music that she thinks if the exact opposite of Bellamy fucking Blake. So she fills the 17 hour drive with twenty one pilots and Halsey. Nothing like songs about guns and gasoline to help her forget what happened.

She buys lime hot cheetos every time they stop and reads the same page in her book for hours, unable to focus on the words. Her hand unconsciously moves to the healing bruise on her forehead which is now an ugly brownish yellow color... But once that is finally gone, she will have nothing left to remember Bellamy by. Good. The less she has to think about him the better.

All she wants when they get home is to lie in bed for a few hours and watch How to Lose a Guy In Ten Days over and over, but of course Raven and Miller insist they go look for a dress for Clarke.

Raven likes a bright blue one with cut outs on the sides, but Miller fights for a yellow one that both girls shoot down right away.

“You said I was pale, why would I wear a yellow dress?” Clarke asks him, throwing a balled up tissue at his head.

But Clarke finds a deep purple dress that all three of them agree on.

“This makes your boobs look so great, Griffin,” Raven tells her and Miller makes a gagging noise. “You’re gay Miller, not blind. You can still appreciate boobs even if you don’t like them.”

“Yeah not the boobs I’m worried about. It’s the person attached to them. I will not appreciate my sister’s boobs.”

“Fair enough,” Raven relents.

“i can wear that berry colored lipstick I have,” Clarke says as she looks in the mirror.

“That’d look hot,” Raven tells her.

“So what shoes do I need to wear?” Clarke asks, swaying back and forth to watch the dress move around her ankles.

“Not heels. I heard about a girl a few years ago who wore heels to winter formal but they got uncomfortable so she took them off, and another girl wearing heels accidentally stepped on her foot and the heel went right through.”

Clarke winces, “It went through her foot?”

“Yep.”

“Okay so no heels. Definitely flats...”

They pay for the dress and drive back to Clarke and Miller’s house. When they get there, Raven demands Miller leave them be and locks the door to Clarke’s room.

“Spill, Griffin,” Raven says, hands on her hips.

“Spill what?” Clarke asks, sitting on the floor to untie her shoes.

“Why you’ve been moping all day. Miller didn’t notice cause he’s a guy, but I know you. Something is up.”

Clarke sighs, she knows she wasn’t doing a very good job hiding anything. Honestly she wasn’t even trying to. But she can’t talk about it. Bellamy is a heartless dick, but she still promised him she wouldn’t tell anyone. Clarke is not the type of person to be catty like that, if she gives you her word not to say anything, she won’t. “I can’t tell you.”

“Bullshit, no matter how bad it is, you can always tell me,” Raven says, sitting on the floor next to her.

“It’s not bad, but I promised someone I wouldn’t say anything to anyone...”

“Well I’m not no one, Clarke. I’m your best friend.”

“You have to promise me that no matter what you won’t tell anyone, ever. Take this shit to your grave.”

“I promise, but you’re scaring me here,” Raven says.

Clarke takes a deep breath and tells Raven everything. Starting with the door to the face, ending at the camera on the beach. It can’t really hurt to tell Raven, and it feels good sharing the weight of this with someone. She starts crying when she tells Raven about yelling at Bellamy after the car got stuck and she has to take a break for a minute after that.

“I just thought he would be so different than how he turned out to be,” Clarke sniffles. “I thought he was some rich boy celebrity in the beginning but then he wasn’t and I just feel so stupid for falling for this.”

“I am going to go into Miller’s room right now and burn all his CDs,” Raven says. “I’ll tweet him rude and inappropriate things until he has to block me and then I’ll make another account and do it all over again.”

“Thanks, Rae.”

Clarke leans her head on Raven’s shoulder and wipes tears from her cheeks.

“I thought teen romance was supposed to be cute. I thought it was supposed to end with heartfelt songs sung in the rain... Not like this.”

“Yeah... But life isn't High School Musical 2...” Raven says.

Clarke can’t help but think of Bellamy after that because if she’s thinking about teen romance as this, than he does too. “I wish it was though...”

“Me too.”

It’s the next and Monty and Jasper have joined them at the Griffin-Miller household. Raven slept over so she and Clarke are still lounging around in their pajamas. They’re all gathered in front of the tv watching Keeping Up With the Kardashians because why not. E! news comes on afterwards and they’re all too lazy to move, or to even grab the remote to change the channel for that matter. So they watch a story about an intruder getting into Kris Jenner’s house, one about the Star Wars premiere, and then a story comes on that has Clarke holding her breath. She can feel Raven’s stare and then Raven is taking her hand.

“So Bellamy, tell me about this girl you were seen with last week,” the reporter baits, watching him with fake interest. But she is very peppy with her fake interest.

A picture of Clarke pops up on the screen and all the guys stare at her.

“She was just a fan. A lot of fans come out to meet me,” he says with a shrug. He seems so nonchalant, so calm as he tells blatant lies. She told him over and over again that she was not a fan.

“And these rumors about the two of you dating?”

“They’re just rumors, I might have taken a few pictures with the girl... I’m sorry but I don’t even remember her name...”

“We have sources that say she came all the way from Washington state to come see you.”

“I have pretty dedicated fans,” he says. “Like I said I have a lot of fan encounters every week, and last week was pretty busy working on some new songs. I feel awful that I don’t remember her much.”

So it’s not enough for him to dismiss her, he has to use her as a plug for his music now too. He doesn’t remember her name... Funny because she remembers him yelling it at her when she tried to walk away from him. She remembers him laughing with her and kissing her and telling her personal things. She remembers telling him things, being vulnerable around him, trusting him.

Everyone else is still in shock as Clarke quickly stands from the couch and makes her way to the bathroom. She turns the lock and curls up on the floor, trying to breathe through her sobs. She’s over Bellamy, she doesn’t give a shit about him anymore. But she doesn’t deserve to be told she’s nothing once, especially not as many times as this asshole is throwing it around. She is amazing, she is funny and smart and talented. Clarke is kind and always thinks of others before herself. But she is not nothing. She is not someone to be overlooked, dismissed, forgotten or pushed aside.

She knows all of these things, but it hurts to hear someone so convinced otherwise.

Clarke hears footsteps coming towards her and muffled whispers on the other side of the door. She turns her head towards the door and sees Miller laying on the floor just outside. There is a gap between the bottom of the door and the floor from where they took out the carpet and replaced it with hardwood.

Miller simply slips his hand under the door and Clarke takes it. He doesn’t ask her what happened, he doesn’t ask her what’s wrong. He just lies there with her until she stands up off the floor and opens the door. Then he’s wrapping his arms around her and telling her that Bellamy Blake isn’t anything special.

“Mom and dad won’t be back until late tonight,” he says. “You want to get that bottle of vodka and get shitfaced.”

She laughs but it sounds weird because she’s just been crying, “I really do.”

They all go into the kitchen and Miller grabs the bottle that their parents have ‘hidden’ before they all go down to the basement. They pass around the bottle giving bad movie descriptions to see if anyone can guess what movie they’re talking about. Raven definitely wins most creative by describing Captain America with the sentence ‘tiny dude gets drugged and to save his country’.

It’s fun getting drunk with her friends. This is what she’s supposed to be doing at 18, doing reckless things with her friends, ditching class to go see a movie, going to prom. Her life is good and she wouldn’t trade it for all the fame in the world.

She is going to wake up with a killer hangover tomorrow, but she figures it’s worth it.

---

Clarke drives Raven home on the Friday before prom and they force Miller into the backseat with his AUX cord privileges revoked for a week because he tried to play a Demi Lovato song.

When they get home, Clarke and Raven take over the tv in the living room so they can watch all the Nicholas Sparks movies and laugh at how terribly cheesy they all are. Clarke has to admit that she likes the Last Song, but Raven says that’s only because of Liam Hemsworth and Clarke can’t really argue there.

On Saturday they order a few pizzas and all the guys come over. They end up having a burping contest after Jasper lets out the wimpiest burp and, well they can’t just let that go unnoticed.

Clarke insists that she and Raven need at least an hour and a half to get ready and drags her friend up the stairs to her bedroom. She definitely notices Raven mouth help me and all the guys laugh.

Clarke is trying to get her eyeliner just right when Raven looks over to her.

“You sure you’re okay?” she asks.

“I’m fine, Raven. It’s been a week and I’m not going to dwell on it. One day I can sell the story and that’ll be a nice ‘fuck you too, Bellamy!’.”

“So we’re gonna kick ass tonight right? Looking hot and taking names?”

“Don’t know any other way to be, babe,” Clarke laughs.

Jasper and Monty whistle when they walk down the stairs when it’s time to go. Abby insists on pictures like they all knew she would. So Clarke takes one with Raven where they’re doing that incredibly awkward, standard prom picture. But they’re the same height so it’s even more awkward which is great. Miller and Clarke take on together where she rests her head on his shoulder. And then of course Monty and Miller have to take one together since they are the only two with actual dates, even if they are each other’s dates. So continuing with the dates theme, Jasper, Clarke, and Raven take a picture together, pouting about their lack of dates.

They all pile into Clarke’s car afterwards and play Jasper’s ‘ITS PROM BITCHES GET PUMPED’ playlist as they drive to the school. The parking lot is pretty full since some people wasted a shit ton of money on a limo, Clarke gets the appeal since it’s their senior year and you want it to be memorable, but they are seriously expensive and Clarke prides herself on being responsible thank you very much. They all link arms as they walk into the gym.

Things have been a bit awkward for Clarke since Bellamy’s stupid interview. There were cameras at the road leading up to her house and reporters asking her questions. She told them all to fuck off, but she did so gracefully. But everyone at school still give her weird looks like they don’t know what to make of her anymore.

But tonight is prom so she won’t let a few stares get to her.

A few songs play before the lights change and the music stops all together. A spotlight moves to the stage and Clarke wishes she had worn heels so she could do some damage. Bellamy fucking Blake has some nerve showing up here, drawing all attention to him at her prom like he is something special.

“Clarke Griffin,” he says into the microphone and the crowd standing in front of her parts like Bellamy is Moses or some shit. He’s got that goddamn guitar again and and he’s smiling this nervous smile that no one would ever expect from him. She takes a step towards the stage, but just one so he doesn’t get a big head or anything, and the smile on his face grows an impossible amount. “I’m sorry, Princess.”

He just smiles at her for a moment more before he starts playing the guitar. His voice echoes in the gym as he sings into the microphone.

His eyes never leave hers as he sings and something in her is reminded of him singing about being her hero. He let her down with that one, but he’s here, apologizing the only way he knows how to. And this time the song is actually for her. It’s not the generic shit she convinced herself he was singing the first time, he wrote these words just for her.

Here I am with all my heart I hope you understand

I know I let you down but I'm never gonna make that mistake again

She knows this time is different because he looks so vulnerable right now, almost lost. When he sang at his house he was all confidence and charm. He was performing then, putting on a show for his guests. But now his eyes lock onto hers and she was right when she first met him, his eyes give away his every emotion. And he looks scared. He looks like a guy who is putting everything on the line, and he’s doing it for her.

I never wanted to make you feel so small, he sings and she finds herself tearing up because that is how he made her feel. And apparently it hurt him too.

One line in a song won’t be enough to fix this, but he is trying and that says something.

His smile becomes more sure as he steps off the stage and tentatively walks towards her. By the time he makes it to her, he is repeating how he will never make that mistake again.

She wanted to believe he was good, she wanted to accept his kindness and think that he was giving it to her for a reason. Her anger blinded her and now she realizes that the reason she was so mad and so hurt is because she loves him. Sure she was angry at Finn, but she got over it and laughs about it now. She got so upset over Bellamy because she was so devastated over losing whatever it is they had.

You say what no one else will say

You know exactly how to get to me

She has to smile at that. He called her stubborn and hated how honest she was. It was in the heat of their argument that he said those things, and she can tell he has been thinking about her a lot since he likes those things about her now.

I want the world to see what you mean to me

His song comes to an end and his vulnerability is back. Now he’s looking at her like a lost puppy, like she has the power to break his heart because this time it’s her move.

“Did you think this would make up for everything?” she asks quietly, not wanting anyone else to hear.

He shrugs and takes a deep breath. “Grand gestures, public declarations of love... Usually works in the movies...”

“This isn’t a movie, Bellamy Blake,” she tells him but even she can hear the fondness in her voice.

“I was hoping you would make an acception.”

“You’re an idiot,” she says as she grabs his hand and leads him out of the gym. She pulls him outside and takes his guitar, gently setting it on the ground. “Don’t make me regret this.”

“Regret what-”

He’s cut off by her wrapping her arms around his neck and burying her face in his neck. He lets out a deep breath and she feels his arms wrap around her waist.

“I’m sorry,” he whispers. “I thought that what I do was too important to risk, but clearly you’re worth it. I mean there will definitely be a big change and you should get to decide if you want that.”

She pulls away from him so she can look him in the eyes. “I do, because I want you. And I may be completely stupid but I do want you.”

“I want you too. But I think that is pretty evident,” he chuckles.

“How did you do all this?” she asks.

“The song was easy, I felt like shit after my interview and I was supposed to be recording some new songs but, I couldn't even focus. I just sat down and wrote it and I knew I had to find a way for you the hear it.”

“So you stalked me to find out where my school was just so you could sing me a song?” She means to sound teasing but she's a little self conscious right now and needs him to say it.

“I came here to apologize,” he says, leaning down to rest his forehead against hers. “And to tell you that I love you.”

“You do?” she asks, her voice sounding small.

“I really do.”

“I love you too, asshole.”

I'm never gonna make that mistake again , was what he promised her. And he never does.