Chapter Text

Chapter One

15 Years ago

He heard a loud thud and opened his eyes. “Tony did you just get in bed?”. 

“It's five am in the morning”

Tony groaned. “I was working on a little project and lost time. Sorry”.

He turned around and wrapped his arms around him. “I know you were working late but I'm going to need some convincing if you're sorry or not”.

Tony giggled and gave his boyfriend kisses all over his face. “Is that enough?”.

He shook his head and then Tony crossed on top of him. 

It was a very long night.

                           *~*

Steve was watching some news on the TV when Natasha walked into the living room.

“Hey”

“Hey Nat”

“I noticed you didn't get anything to eat” Natasha raised an eyebrow.

“Yeah…I've been feeling very nauseous this morning” Steve replied. 

“Could you get sick?” She asked grabbing the remote to change the channel, “Cap, no one watches the news on TV anymore”.

“But you must admit it's the best way of getting to know fact, reading it online is more energy tasking” He replied her, watching her change the channel to an action movie instead. “And no, after the serum I've never gotten sick before”. 

“Okay, whatever you say Cap”.

                        *~*

This time it was Sam that came by to the avengers compound.

He found Steve puking in the toilet. “Hey, are you alright?”. 

“Yeah” Steve said shaking his head. “Just give me a minute” and he continued for about twenty more minutes.

Sam waited for him to relieve himself to his hearts content, then he went and grabbed a towel and a bottle of water for him.

“I think we need to get him to a hospital or something” He also brought along Wanda.

“Guys” Steve raised his hands. “I'm okay, it might just be some food I ate”.

“Except he hasn't eaten anything for the past two weeks” Natasha added.

“Nat, you too?” Steve waved. “Listen, this serum made me immune to illness I can't get sick, alright?”.

Sam, Natasha and Wanda looked at each other. “If you won't go to the hospital, then at least let Wanda scan you with her magic, we can't just do nothing”.

The captain had no other choice but to agree. Wanda set him down on the sofa, while Natasha grabbed a pillow to support his head in order to begin the process. 

Wanda used her magic three times to scan him. Each time she stopped at his waist, looking unsure and confused, but the third time her expression was more of concern than anything else.

“What did you see?” Steve raised an eyebrow at her.

“I..saw..this is crazy” Wanda took a deep breath. “I don't think you'd believe me if I were to tell you”. 

“That serious?” Sam sounded worried.

“He's…Steve is pregnant” Wanda confessed. 

One minute their faces were serious/worried, the next it was funny like someone holding back a laugh but it grew to concern when they saw Wanda wasn't joking with them.

“I saw in his stomach, a very healthy and strong baby” Wanda repeated. “A baby boy to be exact”.

“That's crazy” Steve laughed putting a hand to cover his face, then he paused to watch her features. “I mean you're obviously not crazy, wh- what I meant was that-  look I can't be pregnant, I'm not a woman. It's impossible”. 

“Maybe you saw wrong?” Sam tried to calm them both down.

“If you don't believe me, because I don't think I saw wrong, you could go to the hospital” Wanda encouraged. 

“That would be a PR nightmare if Captain America was caught going to a hospital for that purpose” Natasha added.

“Why don't you take a pregnancy test?” Sam questioned. “Just to be certain, I mean our lives are filled with the impossible, we can't be certain”. 

“Okay” Steve agreed. “I'll get a pregnancy test”.

                          *~*

Clint came by with them the next time, together with the pregnancy test kit.

“I'm a super spy” He reminded Steve when he raised an eyebrow. “I connected the dots…well I didn't know it was a man”.

“We're not exactly sure about that yet” Steve replied.

Natasha handed him over the test kit and he went into the bathroom. He was in there for 30 minutes, when his teammates started getting worried about him.

“How was it?” Wanda asked almost impatiently.

“I'm pregnant” 

Steve watched all their reactions form into confusion, shock, concern, fear, and then concern again. He suddenly started panicking, what was he going to tell Tony, how in the world was he pregnant, how did pregnancy even work?

He found himself feeling lost, and very dizzy from all the thoughts rushing in, he barely had time to react to his friends screams when they watched him fall to the ground with a loud thud.  

                            *~*

“What am I going to do?” Steve looked at his hands. “I don't even know how this is possible”.

Wanda sighed. “You gave us a scare there, Steve”.

Natasha nodded. “She's right. We might not know how this happened, but we aren't going to let you handle it alone”. 

“How am I going to tell Tony?” Steve scratched his head.

“I'm pretty sure he's supportive of gay rights” Clint replied. 

“Clint” Sam said shaking his head in laughter. “They're together”.

Clint looked confused like a deer caught in street lights.

“Cap and Tony are sleeping together” Natasha spelt it out for him.

“Does he even want to have kids?” Steve shook his head. “We never spoke about it, and knowing Tony he might not-”.

“Steve” Clint said. “I don't mean to drop this question but someone's got to ask, do you want this baby?”. 

“I- I've always wanted kids and really the decision is not hard, it's my dream and I can't- no matter how small or-” Steve sighed deeply. “Me and Tony are a couple, this decision isn't only mine for as long as we are together”

A few months later

Steve had one thing or particularly one person keeping him together when he felt like he was nothing, a friend who stayed by his side no matter what, someone who defeated all bullies for him and that person was Bucky Barnes.

After their last encounter where they met again, he had been working to find his best friend who was wrongfully mind controlled by Hydra. It turned out that this friend was now accused of killing the King of Wakanda, but his instincts didn't let him believe that to be the case.

Tony pulled him aside after he, T’challa, Sam, intervened in Bucky’s arrest, away from everyone's view. “Steve, what were you thinking out there? I know that our visions are often…contradictory, but I thought we were on the same page”.

“Tony” Steve said “Bucky is my friend, my best friend, he was controlled by Hydra to do all of those awful things and now I don't think that he did this one”.

“He- whether he did or did not, if you sign the accords he's going to be placed for mental health care not a Wakandian prison, which is better?” 

Steve blinked. “I- I d-don't know, where's everyone?”.

He watched as his boyfriend avoided eye contact. “Tony?”.

“Hmm?”

“Where's everyone?”.

Tony bit his lips, like the words he was about to say were too much for him. “Wanda, she's under house arrest-”

“Tony!” Steve snapped. “She's a kid!”.

Steve honestly didn't know where he was coming from, Wanda was 27 at the time but still younger than both of them, they could give birth to her. It felt wrong, it made him feel like…she was their unborn child that Tony had kept locked up.

“Give me a break!” Tony snapped back. “Right now she's a weapon of mass destruction”.

“H-how could you say that?!” He replied in a low voice. “Wanda didn't mean for any of that to happen, it was a mistake”.

“Alright, it was just a mistake! But we both know that in our profession we cannot afford to make mistakes, we need to be kept in check!” Tony shouted back.

Steve was immediately reminded of their early avengers days, they were too busy using anger to hide what feelings they both harbored for each other. It was destroying not only them but their team, that was until they were able to conquer it and be honest with each other.

“I have another- something else to tell you Tony” He took a step closer. “It's really important that you know this”.

That was the worst of the worst timings, Bucky had just managed to break out of the cell that was holding him and they hurried to get down there. 

                            *~*

Steve and Sam had escaped with Bucky into a secluded warehouse off town, and although it was hard they tied him up in case he was still the winter soldier.

When Bucky woke up confirming his identity with his mother's name, they all relaxed themselves and got into planning their next escape.

“I know we are in the middle of something big” Bucky turned to Steve, “But I have to ask, are you doing okay?”. 

Sam turned to a corner to give them privacy, well as much privacy an abandoned warehouse could give. “I'm pregnant Buck”.

Bucky didn't laugh, he looked rather startled. “You mean t-that there is a child inside you right now, and you're still running around trying to save me?”.

Steve shook his head, and for the first time in a long while he laughed. “I have been extremely careful, nothing is going to happen to him. B-but you don't seem shocked at all about it I mean”.

Bucky rubbed his hands. “Before you saved me Hydra, they gave him lots of w-well these liquids to force me to-”.

“You don't have to tell me,” Steve reminded him. “If you're not okay with it”.

“Produce more super soldiers,” Bucky explained with great difficulty. “They were in the process of doing so when a new discovery was made, someone- Howard had made provisions for it in the first vials of the serum, they never found out how he did though”.

Steve stared mouth open at him “Then how come it's only working now?”.

“It could be a number of reasons, sorry for listening in by the way” Sam waved away the awkwardness. “Cap, you were frozen for so long it might have slowed down the effects till now”. 

“Oh” 

“Tony's the father right?” Bucky said and the look on Steve's face actually made him smile. “I saw the way you looked at each other, but damn Howard got the grandchild he was always looking for”.

“Bucky” Steve said, both scolding him but also very fondly.

                         *~*

They got to the airport and joined the group, or well everyone that was on Cap's side of the accords.

“I told him everything,” Clint pointed at Steve's stomach and then at Scott. “He knows the consequences too, and tiktak agrees right?” 

Scott nodded furiously. “I'm very happy to be here Captain America, plus I am a dad too and to know the sacrifices that you'll be making for a good cause against…that makes me confident in this”.

“Thanks Scott” Steve turned to the rest. “You all don't have to do this-”.

Sam raised a hand to stop him. “Cap, we all agreed to be here, no regrets”. 

And so Steve fought against the man he was in love with, and also the father of his unborn child while trying not to hurt either of them. He knew that he had to fight him in order to get to the other side, but he never planned on hurting him.

He later realized that in a fight, someone must get hurt as seen by Rhodey.

“Is he going to be alright?” Bucky asked.

“Rhodes is his best friend,” Steve said without specifying who ‘his’ was. “They knew each other before I came along, they're like brothers and he'd be the last person I would have wanted to hurt”.

“But we can't turn round now” Steve blinked back the tears not wanting Bucky to think he was at fault, he already had many things to blame himself over. 

                       *~*

When Tony found them in Siberia, Steve ran into a hug with him but he didn't react to him at all. He was as cold and distant as when they'd first met, but they were both trying to play it off as nothing. 

“How's Rhodey?” Steve asked with concern.

“Oh so now you care about Rhodes?” Tony replied sarcastically.

“The main thing is that I believe your buddy over here isn't responsible” He pointed at Bucky to drop the gun.

“Tony there's something important I have to tell you” Steve stated.

“Really? Was that before or after you tried to kill my best friend? My brother?” Tony placed a hand to his chest. “Let's just get this over with”.

Their peace or truce didn't last as Helmut Zemo showed the clip of Bucky killing his parents to Tony. He immediately lost it and threw Steve across the room, going straight to Bucky to end him.

They continued like that for a long time, fighting among each other, Steve tried to stop him reminding him that killing Bucky wouldn't change anything but that only made matters worse.

“Did you know?!” Tony was frantically shooting both Bucky and Steve after he answered him with a ‘Yes’. 

If Steve were honest he didn't know that things would get that far. He felt guilty for keeping not one large but two secrets from Tony, but he thought that the news would be better delivered in a better environment and circumstances. 

This was not what he planned. 

Tony raised his repulsor to kill Steve, and he replied in an equally angry way, he wanted to shout ‘im pregnant with your baby, please stop’ but Bucky was also a victim, his whole body and mind had been defied and he was still struggling but if he let everything go on then the people he cared about would end up dead.

After disabling Tony's armor, the look in his eyes told him he could never go back to the way things were, his eyes were now filled with anger and hate for him.

“You don't deserve that shield!” Tony shouted. 

“You definitely don't deserve me”

Steve had held himself so well up until that point. Maybe he once thought that keeping the secret was all he could do to prevent them from fighting to the death, but he failed to take into consideration that because of the love that Tony had for his parents and brotherly love that he had for Bucky, no one was going to give up or agree to have a nice chat if it meant that the other would win up dead. 

.

                  *~*

Scott, Clint, Natasha, Wanda, and Sam were broken out of their prisons by Steve. He took them together with their family and Bucky to Wakanda, where they stayed secured.

Before he left for good, he sent Tony a phone and apologized in a letter, he knew that no matter what he said that his mind wouldn't be changed so he went for a simple ‘i'm sorry’ and told him that if he were ever to forgive him, he should reach out.

Tony never reached out.