Chapter Text
Jiwoong hugged his arms around himself, swallowing back the wave of nausea that was threatening to overwhelm him. He had hardly been able to make it through vocal training, there was no way we would be getting through a three hour long dance practice. He had woken up feeling a little unwell that morning but had brushed it off until he literally wasn’t able to. After eating lunch, his slight stomach ache had become much more severe.
The man was taking in deep and slow breaths as he rushed down the hall to the private restroom. His members wouldn’t notice if he was gone for a few minutes and Jiwoong hoped that he wasn’t actually sick. Maybe he had just eaten something bad. The nausea would pass and he would be okay for the rest of practice.
The cramping was becoming almost unbearable and he wasn’t even able to lock the door as he slammed it shut. The man fell to his knees in front of the toilet, ducking his head into it before he began gagging. He was squeezing his arms to his stomach, hoping desperately that the pressure would help. His head was spinning. He pitched forward as his stomach lurched and he heaved into the toilet.
There was an awful sound of liquid hitting the water and Jiwoong’s eyes burned with tears. His throat was on fire and he felt too weak to pick his head up. He choked up another wave of bile, gripping the toilet to keep himself from falling. When his stomach had stopped convulsing, he rested his forehead against the porcelain, body shaking with shivers. He felt so awful, there was no way that he was just having a stomach ache. In the back of his mind he could register the body aches and the chilliness in his limbs due to a fever, but he wasn't ready to address it.
There was a knock on the door and Jiwoong couldn’t register who was there. “Hyung, are you in there?” He couldn’t tell who it was but he knew now that it had to be one of his members. He was basically hugging the toilet bowl, feeling like the room was spinning. He wanted to try and call out to them to quell their worry, but before he could; he had his head back in the toilet bowl, stomach doing a backflip. He involuntary let out a whimper.
The door opened and shut. “Baobei…” A warm hand pressed against his back, rubbing in a circular motion to help him catch his breath. He knew now that the person outside the door had been his boyfriend, Zhang hao.
He was so dizzy and exhausted, but he hated that Hao had found him like this. He was taking in a few deep breaths, blinking away tears and hoping that Zhang Hao couldn't see them. He inwardly cursed himself for not locking the door. Jiwoong was too ashamed to look up, not wanting to face his partner and dongsaeng while in such a condition.
Zhang Hao was behind Jiwoong, rubbing his shoulders and back to offer him comfort. He set his palm against Jiwoong’s forehead, cringing at how hot his skin was. “Woong, you’re burning up. Why didn’t you tell someone that you weren’t feeling well?” Hao was supporting him from behind, offering him a chance to rest, trying to give him some comfort. He was glad that he had brought his water bottle with him when he left to find Jiwoong. His hyung would surely need it.
“I’m fine…” Jiwoong’s voice was gravely and he swallowed back the acrid taste coating his tongue. He felt so weak. The room was spinning and he felt extremely light headed. His stomach was so nauseous and he was trying to breathe slowly, hoping it would relax the upset organ.
He leaned back into Zhang Hao, not having the strength to hold himself up. He hated that someone had found him but he felt relieved that it was Zhang Hao and not one of their other members.
Zhang Hao frowned deeply. “You are not fine-” He was upset about Jiwoong’s lack of care for himself. He was always taking care of the entire group but never stopped to take care of himself. Hanbin would have made sure he stayed home to rest if he had known that Jiwoong had even the slightest stomach ache.
Hao carefully moved Jiwoong away from the toilet, leaning him against the wall. Hao then grabbed a paper towel and wet it, kneeling in front of him after he had wrung it out. “You should have told one of us…” Gently, he was wiping the older man’s mouth and then washing his face, clearing away the sweat, hopefully cooling him off. He was upset that Jiwoong hadn’t come to him. “You should have at least told me.” Zhang Hao was mad at himself. He had noticed Jiwoong acting a little lethargic and off today but he had chalked it up to exhaustion. He was angry that he hadn't noticed how unwell his boyfriend obviously was. Even earlier, his cheeks had been flushed from very little exertion.
“Here. Swish and spit.” Hao handed over his water bottle, helping Jiwoong lean over the toilet bowl. Jiwoong did as told. He then took a very small sip of water before leaning back against the wall again. He was feeling too exhausted to do anything but watch Hao. He could see the anger and disappointment in his expression and it made him feel worse. “It’s just an upset stomach, Hao… I didn’t want to burden anyone. The comeback is next week and I just… I didn’t want anyone to worry. Really, I’m okay…”
Hao noticed that despite how much Jiwoong was sweating, his body had not stopped shivering. He quickly slipped off his hoodie, not caring that he was left only wearing a thin t-shirt. “This is obviously more than an upset stomach, Jiwoong.” He carefully guided Jiwoong in slipping on the hoodie, frowning as his boyfriend curled up a little more after it was on. “You really should be in bed resting… Have you been feeling sick all day?”
Jiwoong gave a hesitant nod. “I… I woke up feeling a little off. I thought it was just exhaustion… It wasn’t until after lunch that I started to actually feel sick… I thought I could just… ignore it until after we finished for the day.”
Zhang Hao's brows furrowed. “You could have sent yourself to the hospital. You have a fever, hyung. It was irresponsible of you to not tell anyone . We had lunch almost two hours ago. You've been suffering for two hours and we could have supported you or gotten you some medicine before it got this bad.” He tossed the paper towel into the trash and then washed his hands. “I think you have a high fever. You really need to get into bed and rest.” He had placed the palm of his hand back to Jiwoong’s cheek and the older leaned into the contact, sighing and shutting his eyes. Hao's hand was soft and despite how cold he was feeling, the coolness of his boyfriend's palm was comforting. Zhang Hao stroked his cheekbone, watching as Jiwoong relaxed under his touch.
“I am an adult, Hao... I can take care of myself. I know my own limits. I appreciate you caring about me, but I am able to take care of myself. “ Jiwoong hated that Zhang Hao was seeing him like this. He hated that he was so weak, incapable of just getting through this without dragging anyone into it. He hated being a cause for others to feel anxious. “I really don’t want anyone to fuss over me… I don’t want anyone to worry, including you. I’m okay, jagi.” He was trying to be convincing, giving Hao a sweet smile. It failed due to his flushed face and sunken shoulders. He didn't feel well enough to look fully confident in what he was saying.
“Hyung, you have worried me. You are sick and have a fever and I hate that I can't make it just go away.” Hao moved to caress the back of Jiwoong's neck. “You are throwing up and shivering… How can I not worry?” Jiwoong was a very stubborn person. Zhang Hao knew that the only way to reason with him when he was being like this, was to appeal using their relationship. “You have me worried, baobei. I don't like seeing you so sick.” He gently ran his hand through the back of Jiwoong's hair, lightly scratching. “Please, let me talk to a manager and come back to the dorm with me. You need to rest. “
Jiwoong was not able to allow Hao to worry or feel upset. Almost immediately, he relented, not wanting to fight him anymore. He hated seeing the desperation and worry in Zhang Hao's face. “I don’t want the others to get worried and lose focus.”
Hao’s eyebrows furrowed again and he pulled back so that they could make eye contact. “Jiwoong, we care about you and your wellbeing. Obviously, we care more than you do about your own health.” Zhang Hao let out a breath, calming himself. He was getting more upset at the thought that Jiwoong really would have suffered through this without telling anyone. “We will talk about it later...” He knew he needed to focus on taking care of Jiwoong right now.
He could shout at him later, when he was in better health. Hao looked him over. Jiwoong looked so small like this… It was odd to see his normally tall and muscular partner look so defeated and tiny. He sighed and then took his hands, squeezing them. They were clammy and Hao didn't like how weak Jiwoong's grip felt. “Baobei, I just want you to get back to the dorm to have some proper rest… I won't let you stay at practice, so you shouldn't argue anymore. I am not letting you go into the practice room and I will make Gunwook carry you to the van if I need to.”
Jiwoong had his head down, staring at the floor. His arm that wasn't connected to the hand holding Hao's, was still tightly wrapped around his abdomen. He knew Hao was upset with him and he knew that he deserved it. He should have told someone how he was feeling. “I’m sorry… I… I'll go.” He didn't want to look up and see the disappointment in his boyfriend's face. “I know you're upset and…”
Hao moved to run a hand through his sweaty hair, cutting Jiwoong off. “We can talk about it later, baobei.” He swept damp hair from his eyes, hoping Jiwooong would finally look up at him. “Let's just focus on making you feel better, okay?” He squeezed Jiwoong's shoulders. “Do you think you're done getting sick?” He pulled the hoodie’s hood up to try and keep Jiwoong a little warmer. The older man still hadn’t stopped shivering.
Jiwoong nodded, finally raising his eyes to meet Hao's. “For now… my stomach feels really crampy but… I think I'm done… I'm not as nauseous…” Now that he had actually gotten sick, the exhaustion was more prevalent than the stomach cramps.
Hao rubbed circles into his shoulder comfortingly. “I don't like that you're on the floor, hyungi. It's dirty. How about we move to one of the lounges? You’ll be more comfortable on one of the couches, and I can go and get a manager.” Hao could see Jiwoong's resolve wearing down. He really must be feeling bad if it was this easy to convince him.
Jiwoong nodded slightly. “Okay…” He felt so, so dizzy. He honestly didn't think it mattered where he was. The tiles of the bathroom floor were just as comfortable as a couch. It had the added bonus of being near a toilet.
Zhang Hao carefully helped him up, wrapping an arm securely around his waist. He could feel Jiwoong trembling, leaning into him. “I can take your weight, hyung.” Jiwoong seemed faint, muscles straining to hold himself up. He leaned nearly his entire weight against the other man. Hao would carry him on his back if he needed to. He may not be as strong as his hyung, but he had determination and a whole lot of heart.
They slowly made it down the hall and Zhang Hao deposited Jiwoong onto one of the plush couches in the lounge area. Almost immediately, Jiwoong melted into it, curling up. Briefly, he thought that this was much better than the tile floor. He couldn't even bother with removing his shoes, just wanting to hug his knees to his chest in an attempt to get comfortable. In this position, the cramps were a lot less severe.
Hao found a blanket folded up in the corner of the room and he tucked it around Jiwoong's body. He debated on removing his shoes for him but went against it since they would have to put them back on to leave. “Do you want me to pull the trash can over?”
“Please…” Jiwoong’s eyelids felt heavy. He watched Hao walk over to grab the can and then he placed it down in front of him on the floor.
“I’ll be back soon, okay?” Hao really didn’t want to leave him alone. He knew that Jiwoong would be fine, but he felt a strong desire to stay with him. Jiwoong was stubborn and frustrating, but Hao loved his hyung so much. He would spend the rest of the day curled up on the bathroom floor with him if that was what Jiwoong wanted to do.
Jiwoong gave a weak nod and shut his eyes, almost immediately succumbing to the fatigue pulling at his consciousness. Hao made sure the blanket was securely tucked around his shoulders. He spared another glance at his poor sick hyung before quickly leaving to find Hanbin and one of the managers.
— — — — — — —
Jiwoong was woken up by Zhang Hao, gently stroking fingers through his hair. His heavy eyelid's blinked a few times and he tried to focus on his boyfriend's face as it came into focus. “Hao…” His voice was sandpaper rough.
Hao gave him a small smile. “I talked to a manager and Hanbinnie. The van is waiting downstairs. Hanbin is gonna help me get you down to it and then you and I are going back to the dorm, okay?”
The words were getting jumbled up in his head. He just nodded, too exhausted to ask for Zhang Hao to repeat himself. His eyes began to slip shut again and he could feel someone else helping Hao get him to his feet. “Hanbin-ah… I'm sorry…”
“It's okay, hyung. We all get sick.” Hanbin had an arm around him, helping Hao get him off the couch and helping him hold Jiwoong's weight. He gave a very gentle smile to the eldest member. “It's important that we take care of ourselves. You need to go back to the dorm and get some rest. The manager went to pick you up some medicine and Hao is gonna go home with you, okay?”
Jiwoong, again, felt a little confused. He nodded slightly to let his leader know that he had heard him. The dizziness wasn't as bad now, but he felt even more lethargic. His thoughts were slow and syrupy.
Hanbin frowned at Zhang Hao. Jiwoong's eyes were unfocused and he seemed to be out of it. He could feel the heat radiating from the other man and it made his anxiety spike. “His fever seems high… Are you sure you don't want the manager to take him to the hospital? He can get an IV.”
Zhang Hao nodded. “I think he just needs some medicine and rest. He says his stomach only really started hurting after we had lunch. He's thrown up a few times so…” Hao sighed. “It's possible that he got it out of his system. I think he just needs to take a fever reducer and get some sleep. He will probably be upset if we force him to go to the hospital.”
Hanbin nodded. “I trust your decision then.” The two carefully began to walk Jiwoong out to the elevator.
The oldest of the three felt like his legs were heavy and he was frustrated by how hard it was to move. His stomach was still feeling upset, but it was not hurting as much as it had been earlier. He leaned into Zhang Hao's side when they got into the elevator and Hao adjusted his hold, more firmly wrapping an arm around Jiwoong's waist. The ride down in the elevator was quiet. Jiwoong's head was on Hao's shoulder and Hanbin was texting updates to their group mates.
When they got to the van, they found it surrounded by the other members, much to Hanbin’s surprise. He had told them to continue on with practice.
Jiwoong felt self-conscious, frowning at Hao. He was unhappy that his boyfriend had went against his wishes and told the other members.
Hanbin noticed Jiwoong's expression and he cleared his throat. “I was the one that told everyone. Yujin-ah was worried about you and Matthew was going to come look for you. I thought it would be better if I told them so that they would worry less.”
“Hyung…” Ricky had a deep frown on his face.
The six of them were trying not to crowd around him, but it was obvious that they were worried.
He hated seeing them so upset and he sighed. “I am just needing some rest. I will be better very soon.” He looked at Zhang Hao and Hanbin, feeling too tired to try and reassure them.
The other two members of hyung line noticed Jiwoong's expression. Hanbin helped Zhang Hao get Jiwoong into the van before he faced them. “Zhang Hao is going to go back to the dorm with Jiwoong to get him settled. The managers already picked some medicine up for him.” He watched Hao helping Jiwoong get buckled in and then looked back to their younger members. “We will have a shorter dance practice and then we will call it a day.” The door to the van slid shut and he looked back to his members. “Jiwoong hyung really doesn't want the attention. He doesn't want us to worry about him. For now, lets get back to work. Later on, we can all check on him.”
Jiwoong was glad that Hanbin was able to handle them, too tired to face their worries. Zhang Hao had taken the seat next to him. “Take a nap. I'll wake you up when we're back to the dorm, okay?”
Jiwoong nodded. “Hao…” He grabbed his boyfriend's hand, initiating the contact. He was still feeling very guilty. “I'm sorry I'm so stupid and stubborn…”
Zhang Hao's lips upturned into a small smile. “You are horribly stubborn, hyung. But…” He leaned in and kissed his temple. “I love you anyways.” He moved to push Jiwoong's head onto his shoulder. “Nap.” Hao still held his hand, squeezing it to comfort the older man.
Jiwoong let himself rest, falling asleep quickly due to the warming comfort of Hao's body next to his.