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Oda Sakunosuke is sitting on one of the bar’s sofas while sipping on his drink quietly. The place is pretty full compared to usual, and everybody seems to be having fun. On the stage is a band playing a typical 80s rock song. As soon as they’re done, the members get off the stage and join the redhead on the table.
“Odasaku! How was our performance?” asks a familiar brunet; the lead singer and guitarist of the band. He enthusiastically sits next to Oda and gives his friend an energetic fist bump before holding up a drink of his own.
“It was great, good job guys. You did amazing,” replies the man.
Another member, one older than the brunet, comes closer. “Oh don’t go complimenting us like that. You did most of the work, mister composer. ” Oda looks over at her and smiles. Yosano Akiko is one of the most experienced units of the band, so she uses her expertise to help the redhead compose the music from time to time. She’s also the bassist, and sings next to Dazai when needed. “Hi Akiko, and I really didn’t; but I appreciate it.”
“Maybe in your perspective. But in ours, you did so much. So accept our thanks, alright?”
Everyone else slowly joins the table and orders their drinks. Oda is mostly talking to Dazai, as he’s the one he’s closest with. Dazai Osamu is Oda’s best friend. They met in university, when they were both working on a literature degree. After a while, Dazai decided to create a rock band and chose his closest friend as the composer and songwriter; in his words, Odasaku would be the best fit for that role! So the older man took his word for it. They did everything together, and even as they found more friends and people to join, the duo only got closer day by day. They were like two parts of the same coin - so different yet they would complete each other perfectly, in a way nobody else ever could. Dazai would always say they were meant to be best friends forever...
“Odasaku! Wanna play a game of pool?”
...And that was exactly Oda’s problem.
At some point, something changed. It started with him noticing tiny details about Dazai, ones he found intriguing. Then, it turned into dreams of them as more than friends, and only got worse from then. He now can’t help but look at everything about his best friend in a different light; like his dark brown hair and the red-sih eyes that glow under the sunlight. The countless piercings he has, or the scars under his bandages that only Oda gets to see. There’s also something about the unconditional trust Dazai has in his friend. Something that makes him want to hold him, kiss him, and love him more than he ever could in this state. But he can’t do that, and Oda knows it better than anyone. They’re not only best friends, Dazai is also a hundred percent straight. If it wasn’t obvious by the way he flirts with any and all women around, his one-night-stands every other day are enough proof of that; so him loving Oda back is definitely out of the question.
This part of the world isn’t the most supportive of gay people either, so that doesn’t help much. Even if Dazai thankfully accepts him for it and never gives any back-handed comments, Oda doesn’t know how his friend would react to that kind of confession. He couldn’t possibly fathom for their relationship to change just because he can’t keep his feelings for himself. So he won’t be stupid, and he’ll just have to get used to it. It’s been going pretty well - except for Yosano who clearly knows. Doesn’t seem to bother her though.
“ Odasakuuuu , you’re too good at this! Give me a chance to win!”
“You’d have a chance if you were careful about your moves,” replies the redhead while the 8-ball he hit slowly goes into one of the table’s holes, “It’s all about perspective.” The rockstar groans and hands Oda his cue stick, grumbling “You’re no fun.” They then both go in to collect all the balls from under the table.
“Stand back,” yells someone behind them, “we’re taking over the game! Give me that cue!”
“Ranpo, be more respectful of your composer!” Dazai’s yelling makes the band’s drummer laugh, before he takes both sticks from the redhead’s hands.
“If I win this game, you’re paying for all my drinks.”
The two men turn around to see blonde hair and serious eyes looking at Ranpo. Our second guitarist is here , thinks Oda. “Hello Kunikida, how was the show?”
“Pretty good, truly one of your best pieces. I’m glad we got to perform it.”
Ranpo doesn’t leave any time for Oda and Kunikida to talk more, grabbing the latter and forcefully giving him a cue stick.
“Hey Odasaku,” utters Dazai, suddenly awfully close to the redhead, “want a drink? It’s on me!” Hiding his blush from the brunet, Oda nods and starts heading towards the bar.
♡
“And today during practice Kunikida kept complaining about my jokes, as if that wouldn’t make the show even better! Don’t you think so, Odasaku?”
“Definitely.”
The redhead takes a sip of his whiskey and continues listening to Dazai’s rant. The boy seems so much more comfortable and energetic now that they’re alone - not that he isn’t comfortable around the other members of the band, it’s just that he’s more open whenever Oda is around. The man would be lying if he said he didn’t love it; it makes him feel special, needed . As long as Dazai is happy, nothing else matters as much to him. So he’s glad he can provide that.
“Maybe you should slow down on the drinks, Dazai,” warns the older man. “This is your 5th glass of gin,” and he can already notice the slight blush on Dazai’s face, or the way he’s becoming more tipsy.
“What are you talking about? I’m a big man, I can handle it!”
The confident grin on Dazai’s face makes Oda smile. For a moment, he’s thankful that his friend is drunk and by association not analyzing his every move, because he feels his own cheeks getting slightly warmer.
“Sure, you are. Let’s get you home, alright? C’mere.” But when Oda holds Dazai on his back, his friend immediately starts hitting him repeatedly - pretty strongly too - and whines, loudly . “Noooo! I don’t wanna go home, I wanna stay with Odasakuu...“
“Wouldn’t you prefer going back to your house? You can get some nice rest and then we’ll hang out again tomorrow, I promise.”
Another hit on the back. Ouch. “Alright then, let’s get you to my place. You’re insufferable, you know that?.” No answer is received other than a happy whimper from his friend before he seemingly falls asleep on Oda’s back. Cute.
Oda can’t contain the amused smirk creeping up on his face, but it’s not like anyone’s here to see it, so he can afford to be reckless for once. After going around the bar searching for their friends to inform all of them of the two men’s departure, Oda brings Dazai to his car - a modest Ford Pinto he loves dearly - and makes him sit comfortably on the passenger seat before getting in.
The ride is silent, as Oda refuses to put anything on the radio so as to not wake the brunet up. Only a few glances are given to Dazai, all followed by tiny smiles. After a few minutes, they’re at Oda’s apartment’s entry, and the man sighs before lifting up Dazai - still asleep, nothing can wake this little devil up apparently - and making his way into the room. He immediately puts Dazai down on the bed, then softly covers him up with the most comfortable blanket he has. His friend seems to be comfortable, since he doesn’t wake up nor make any complaining noises and just settles on the bed, hugging the pillow next to him tightly with a big smile.
This is the worst , thinks Oda. He’s gonna have to sleep in the same bed as the man he’s been deeply in love with for the past few years, knowing he can’t even think of doing anything or letting his feelings slip - because Dazai will notice. Sure, he’s done that countless times before, but now it’s different. Somehow. It’s a problem for his future self though, since the redhead settles down in his living room’s sofa with a cup of coffee and his faithful notebook; maybe writing a bit before the end of the day will help him clear his mind. Even though he accepted Dazai’s offer as a music composer and songwriter for the band, Oda’s dream is still to be a writer. So he works for it by getting small gigs on newspapers and slowly but surely writing his own novel.
He gets a few hundred words in then checks the time on his wall clock. “4am already?” whispers Oda. Has he really been writing for an hour straight? After putting his notebook and pen down, he makes sure to finish drinking the almost empty cup of coffee and wash it. Once everything is done, he enters the bedroom as silently as possible and settles next to a sleeping Dazai. A quiet “goodnight” is mumbled before the man falls asleep next to his dearest friend.
♡
Oda wakes up to the sound of metal clanging - which confuses him - until he notices three things; first, his bed is a mess. Right, Dazai slept over. Second, it’s very much empty apart from himself. Third, the sound is coming from the kitchen.
“Dazai!”
A few seconds of silence pass, followed by a hesitant “...Yesss?” And that’s Oda’s cue to get out of bed and check what happened. He’s mostly surprised that Dazai would ever want to be in a kitchen again after he almost burned down his own house two years ago, but he’ll ask that later. Now what’s needed is to evaluate the gravity of the situation and get his friend out of whatever mess he put himself into.
Arriving at the crime scene, Oda notices there’s no fire present. So not an 8. No glass is shattered on the ground, which means it goes down to 5. 5 seems accurate enough, because the entire stove is covered in egg yolk and there’s a ton of - seemingly burned - rice on the floor. Next to it is Oda’s brand new pan, if we can still call it that, and the culprit - with a big guilty smile on his face.
“And just what were you trying to do?” Asks Oda. Even with the annoyance in his voice, he makes sure to check that Dazai isn’t hurt in any way and helps him get up from the ground. The brunet is slightly shaking but he’s stable enough to stand on his own. “Well...I woke up in your house and didn’t remember much from last night so I assumed I forced you to take me back here - and decided the best way to apologize was to make Odasaku some curry! It’s his favorite food after all!”
“You’re insufferable. Go take a shower, okay? You’re full of rice. I’m gonna clean this up. You know where the bandages are.” With a pat on the head, Dazai is on his way to the bathroom while Oda is stuck cleaning his own kitchen and finding a way to get rid of the very noticeable smell of eggs. As much as he tries to get mad, Oda just can’t help but chuckle at what happened. He had good intentions, after all . It warms his heart a little bit.
♡
When Dazai is back, Oda is already almost done with breakfast. He’s cooking curry for both of them, making sure that Dazai’s is less spicy than his. The boy was never the best at tolerating that kind of food, so Oda always adapted his cooking to his friend’s preferences. “Thank you for the free clothes, Odasaku!” He suddenly hears from the other side of the hallway.
“Huh? What do you mean by tha-” as soon as Oda turns around, he sees Dazai in one of his button up shirts - one way too big for him - and some shorts. They have shared clothes countless times before, so why does this sight affect Oda so much? He tries his best to hide his blush, focus on the food and not let his mind wander anywhere it shouldn’t. They’re best friends, nothing more, nothing less. Dazai can’t possibly have any feelings towards him. Hoping will only make things worse in the end.
“I never said you could take my clothes,” the redhead chokes, trying to keep his composure.
“Since when did you ever have to tell me before I do?”
“Good point. You’ve always been the best at stealing things from me.”
“It’s my specialty!” The brunet laughed then came closer to Oda, checking the inside of the pan. “Did you throw away what I made for you? Odasaku’s so unfaiiirrr...”
“It was all over the floor, what did you expect me to do?” That grants him two playful hits on his back and another whine. “Pick it up and eat it of course! I’ve put so much time and effort into making it, you’re really ungrateful... It’s “all about perspectives” until your best friend cooks you something that isn’t to your liking huh?”
The friends’ laughter fills the room, and they continue bickering as they’re eating the food on their plates and enjoying each other’s company. They’re practically neighbors and meet up almost every day for practice or to talk about the band’s next show, but they haven’t had the time to spend a day together like that in so long. Oda now notices just how much he missed it, being in the presence of Dazai as close friends instead of business partners.
“Hey, Odasaku,” talking about the devil - the boy takes him out of his thoughts and asks, “wanna go to the beach?”
“What?”
♡
Oda doesn’t really know how they found themselves in this situation - then again, Dazai is the most unpredictable person he knows. They’re sitting on the warm sand next to each other,at an almost empty beach, while the sun is setting. It almost feels romantic , which is ironic if you ask him. Dazai’s gaze is fixated on the glowing half-circle that’s slowly getting absorbed by the sea; an uncommon but beautiful glint in his hazel-colored eyes.
“From here, it looks like the sun is drowning in the water. It’s funny, don't you think, Odasaku?”
A quiet hum escapes from Oda’s lips in response. “Perspectives can be so foolish,” a smile creeps up on Dazai’s face as he continues. “Humans can never see from a perspective other than theirs, no matter how hard they try.”
“Dazai, why did you decide to come here?”
“I mean, I guess it’s not only humans. I wouldn’t consider myself one - I’m far from it. Yet-” The brunet turns around, and their eyes meet. “Even if I know how bad of an idea this is, I just can’t do anything about it. Do you know how weird it is for me not to be able to manage something? I’ve always been in control, always been ahead of everyone and everything - including myself! But now I look at you and-”
“Dazai, are you okay? Your voice is shaky-”
“And I have no idea what to do. It’s so stupid, I’m so stupid, everything is so -”
“Dazai. Calm down. It’s okay. Whatever’s wrong, it’ll be-”
In less than a second, Oda feels Dazai’s lips pressed against his as the taste of gin and smoke invade his senses. The kiss is soft, tender - it’s everything he’s ever wished for and even more. At first, the brunet is hesitant. He doesn’t close the distance between them until Oda kisses him back. He seems to gain more confidence then however, because his hands reach for the back of the redhead’s throat as he slightly deepens the kiss. Oda doesn’t know how many seconds - or minutes - have passed yet; all he knows is that he could stay there and drown in Dazai’s taste forever.
It doesn’t last much longer though, as the need to breathe creeps up on him fast. The men part ways for a few seconds, before Dazai climbs on Oda and kisses him again - more intensely this time. It makes the older man fall on the sand, and they both smile into the kiss. Dazai’s smile turns into slight chuckles that get louder until he’s forced to let go of his lover and fall back next to him on the sand, laughing and practically in tears.
“Hahahahaha! God, that was the most terrifying thing I’ve ever done in my life.”
“Care to explain yourself, you troublemaker?” Asks Oda, trying in vain to hide the smile on his face.
“Well- I found out I was Bi, and thought you’d like to know!”
He sighs. “You’re insufferable, you know that?”