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He keeps putting his foot in his mouth. Jadzia Dax, that beautiful science officer, looks at him fondly when he does it, but Kira Nerys has already bitten his head off about his remark about ‘frontier medicine’, and he doesn’t want to imagine what she thinks of him after his stupid, careless remark about Cardassians attacking Federation outposts.
He’s read about the Setlik III massacre, of course. Details glide across his brain, once he allows them. Miles O’Brien. That’s where he recognizes the name from.
Julian doesn’t want to imagine what a fool Miles O’Brien thinks he is, now. He suspects he’ll be trying to make up for this for quite some time.
It’s just - the date. That year. It does something to him, nudges him toward putting things in a box and sealing them away forever. He doesn’t want to think about that year.
Miles was on Setlik III, saving lives.
And Julian was on Adigeon Prime, losing his own. Being transformed into a better son than the one his parents had been landed with. All that DNA resequencing, and he’s still an idiot in so many of the important ways.
“Have you seen that doctor of yours anywhere?” the head of security asks Kira over the comm, and Julian’s already in motion before the sentence ends. Self-pity can wait. For the first time since he arrived on this station, he’s genuinely needed. It’s the one thing in his life that he can cling to.