Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Dead Ed,

I’ve gone to Amsterdam to care for my grandmother. They say she doesn’t have much time left. I’ll miss you. I don’t tell you often enough that you’re a pretty interesting guy. Maybe you should become a novelist. People would love to hear your story.

It was the last letter Edward had gotten from Alfons. He set it down on his desk and tore a page from his journal. With his sudden burst of inspiration, he wrote:

My name is Edward Elric. Three years ago, I was sent away from my home Armestris. Now I live in Germany.

It’s not all bad. I’ve made wonderful friends. But there’s always darkness looming over me. I had to leave my brother behind. The two of us were separated as punishment for our sin. I don’t know where he is or if he’s even—

There was a knock on the door. Edward hid the letter and paper in his desk, then tiptoed from his bedroom to the living room.

Behind the door stood Noah. Her skin, always dark, had burned and freckled under the summer sun. When she smiled at him, her cheeks glimmered like bronze.

Edward’s own cheeks flamed. He looked away. Why’d she have to be so damn pretty?

“What are you up to?” she asked him. 

“Not much,” he said. “Just homesick, like always.”

She took his hand. “I’d like to take you somewhere, anywhere, just to be with you. Would you like that?”

Edward nodded slowly. His thoughts raced in different directions. Ever since he left Armestris, his life had been boring and lonely, with no excitement or love. Was he ready for it to change?

“I’d love to go!” He flashed his signature smile at her. It shimmered as he followed her out of the house.

Chapter Text

Warmth greeted Alphonse as he strolled down the road. This summer was no different from those burned into his memory. He treasured the hours he spent playing and studying his father’s books on alchemy. They saddened with the times he yearned for him, their mother’s fever, and ended at the night of her failed resurrection.

This summer was no different, save for the lack of Edward.

Three years ago, Alphonse had returned from the gate. He remained as young and grief-stricken as that night. Winry was taller, and Grandma wrinklier, but his brother was missing.

Alphonse’s gaze remained glued to his moonlit window. “Do you really think he’s out there somewhere? Or is he…”

Winry passed as his older sister, with her light blonde hair. She smiled sadly at him as she ruffled his own. “We’ll find him someday, I promise.”

“You swear?” He held his pinky out.

She giggled and hooked her own around his. “I swear.”

The promise was set in stone. Edward would return someday to teach him about alchemy. They’d run, rest, and savor Winry’s apple pie together. They’d do all the things they couldn’t do together while he was in the armor, all the time he couldn’t even remember.

At last he arrived at Izumi’s house. He rang the doorbell and waited.

Sig opened the door. A look of pain contorted his face. “She isn’t feeling well.”

Alphonse shrank. “Oh. Should I leave then?”

“No, come in. She’d love to see you.”

Sig led him to his and Izumi’s bedroom, where she was curled up in bed. Pills littered the floor. Blood soaked her pillowcase. Her body twitched restlessly, stuck in a stiff position.

Worry replaced the excitement in Alphonse’s eyes. He knelt beside her. “Ms. Izumi, how are you feeling?”

Pained laughter escaped her. “You really wanna know the answer to that?”

 “Is there anything I can do?”

She forced a smile. “This is my fault. Even if there was something you could do, I wouldn’t let you.”

 “I understand.”

Izumi hacked, further splattering her bedsheets in red. 

Alphonse stroked her hair awkwardly. “Hang in there.”

Once her coughs stopped, her sigh echoed through the room. “Listen, I don’t want you coming by anymore.”

“Why? Did I do something wrong?”

“No, it’s nothing like that! You’re a good kid, Al! It’s just… I don’t have any more to teach you.”

His head hung low. “Oh. Well, before I quit being your student, there’s something I’ve always wanted to ask you.”

“What is it?”

“…Do you think I’m as good as Ed?”

A gentle warmth washed over her, and her gaze softened. She cupped his cheek. “Don’t worry about being as good as Ed. You’re good enough. Thanks to me teaching you, of course.”

He let out a lighthearted chuckle. “I hope you get better, Ms. Izumi. More than anything.” 

Alphonse stood and left, choking on the bile in his throat. His heart ached with the pain of loss. The threat of losing Izumi loomed closer than ever.

His eyes fell closed. The memory of the way his brother had always comforted him brought another rush of sadness. Where was his big brother, the one he always used to turn to when the world was ending?

Nowhere to be found.

The Rockbell house had its front door open to let in fresh air. Alphonse snuck past. The wooden floorboards didn’t creak beneath his brother’s old boots.

Winry and Grandma played cards at the kitchen table. Though her back was turned, the girl appeared in front of him. “Where were you?”

He surrendered. There was no avoiding Winry. “I went to visit Izumi.”

“What happened? Is she okay?”

“She coughed up a ton of blood, and I don’t think she could get up. I don’t know, I didn’t wanna ask too much.”

“Come here.” With a gentle gesture, she invited him into her arms. Her sisterly side always shone through, especially when things got tough.

He hugged her back. In her arms, he forgot about the bloody mess in Izumi’s room. He only valued his friend’s warmth, and how lucky he was to have her.

Chapter Text

Edward gripped his steering wheel. The bustling streets, quaint shops with their colorful displays, and distant laughter all passed in a blur. His eyes traveled everywhere except for Noah.

The cinema buzzed with a crowd of people. They sat high above the others. With each heartfelt exchange and tender gesture portrayed on the silver screen, a flicker of recognition sparked in Edward’s heart. The film was filled with heartfelt confessions. Edward’s gaze fixed on the screen. Was this what love was like?

He sighed at his unfamiliarity. The girl he liked always made his heart flutter. If only he could stop being a coward.

Next, Edward drove to a museum. Alongside Noah, he admired the painstaking brushstrokes of the paintings decorating the walls. Each canvas captured a moment frozen in time. There was a rich woman wearing pearls and a hardworking farmer steering a tractor.

But the painting his gaze couldn’t stray from was the portrait of a girl with dark brown skin. From beneath a red and blue veil, her brown eyes shimmered. The red dress she wore showed the charm of the gold necklaces dangling from her neck.

Noah gasped. “That’s me! How…?”

He fiddled with his shirt collar. “It’s mine. But how did it end up here?”

“I didn’t know you were a painter.”

“I don’t talk about it. It’s kind of embarrassing.”

“Having painted a picture of me is embarrassing?”

He flinched. “No, of course not! That’s not what I meant!”

Her laugh echoed through the room, filling it with joy. “I know.”

This was hard enough without her teasing.

Noah guided Edward on where to go. He parked near a fountain surrounded by bushes. They sat on a bench beneath the pink and orange sunset.

“Ed,” she began. “You’re lost in your thoughts. Are you having a good time?”

“Of course I am! I’m the happiest I’ve been in years! But... I abandoned everyone I loved. I can’t quit thinking; am I allowed to have fun?”

“You’re guilty.”

“Yeah.”

“It isn’t your fault. Your little brother, you sacrificed your arm for him, right?”

“I had no choice. My little brother, my only brother, they tried to take him from me. I couldn’t let that happen. He’s the only family I had left.”

“Still, it takes selflessness to do that. That’s what I love about you, Ed. You’re compassionate.”

“You’re like that too. I’ve always wondered why you care so much about me. At first I chalked it up to you being nice because you felt sorry for me. But now I realize it’s just who you are. You’re kind, and beautiful, too. I—I mean, you have a beautiful soul.”

He wiped his tears with his sleeve. “I thought I’d cried myself dry. Sorry for ruining your night.”

She rested her hand on his shoulder. “No, you didn’t. I had a great time tonight, too.”

The sun had set. Street lights gave the evening a blond shade.

Edward parked around the block from the house. Hand in hand, he and Noah strode towards it.

“Hey!” a deep voice shouted. The sight that greeted them when they turned was a crowd of soldiers. In their navy blue uniforms, they were ready to leave a lasting impression on civilians.

Soldiers closed in on Noah. They gripped her wrist harshly, like handcuffs. Their staffs threatened to beat her into submission.

Alfons was glued to the scene. “It’s that girl from before. They’re taking her away.”

Edward paused. “It’s better not to get involved. Those guys look official. Plus, it doesn’t look like they’re doing anything wrong.”

“But she’s crying.”

Edward’s expression changed when he saw her tear-stained face. Her eyes were red as they searched for a hope in her despair. She shivered like she was about pass out.

Alfons was the hero that day, so Edward kicked himself for not stepping in.

Noah hid her face under her headscarf and stood there, trembling.

Edward’s fears faded. His arms wrapped around her in a protective embrace. A smile pulled at the corners of his lips while he faced the men.

“What’s a boy like you doing with a gypsy?” one of them asked. “They’re tricksters, you know. She’ll steal your money.”

“So far, she hasn’t stolen anything from me.” A rosy blush swept across his cheeks. “Except for my heart.”

The men retched. “You’re sick!”

He scoffed and laughed mockingly. “Who’s sicker than you pigs?! All you do is use fear to control us!”

Noah took Edward’s arm and hurried away with him. “You can’t speak to them that way. They’ll have you arrested.”

“I don’t give a damn what happens to me! I won’t let them say all that about you!”

She bowed her head. “They can call me whatever they want. I’m used to it. We aren’t welcome here.”

“You mean gyp—or, what do you call yourselves?”

“Roma.”

“Roma,” he repeated. “Nice.”

“But we don’t need a name.”

“Is that why you ran?”

Looking into her eyes, he could see the confusion reflected back at him.

“Even if it means being poor,” he explained. “Even if it’s hard, you just don’t wanna belong to anybody.”

The girl he liked turned and continued her stroll. He could imagine her eyes darting around. Luckily, their home wasn’t far.

The faint sound of his footsteps rang softly as he walked behind her. His gaze shifted back and forth. He was torn between her and the warm glow of the houses lining the quiet lane.

She sped up at the sight of the house up ahead. Longing tugged at his heart as he matched her speed. The sweet scent of summer flowers welcomed them while they entered the garden. He gave her hand a squeeze. They went inside, where peace waited for them like an old friend.

Chapter Text

At the doorstep, Sig’s eyes widened. “You’ve come again?”

“Why wouldn’t I?” Alphonse asked. “Please, I just wanna make sure she’s alright. Will you let me in?”

Sig paused before opening the door wider. “I shouldn’t be surprised. You and Ed have always been stubborn, like Izumi.”

“Al! What did I say last time?!” Izumi tried to sound stern, but her voice was more whiny. She was still shivering on her bloodstained mattress, with the pinkness in her white skin drained.

Alphonse sat on the carpet. “I want you to be honest with me. Are you really okay?”

Her lips formed a bittersweet smile as she chuckled. “Do I look okay?”

“Please,” he pressed. “Tell me the truth. I’m old enough to hear it.”

“Right. You’re thirteen now, aren’t you?”

He nodded. “And a half.”

“I’d been stuck in bed for a few days before you came. I haven’t gotten up since. You know the price of human transmutation.

They took your brother’s arm and leg, and your whole body. For me, they took my insides, the parts that help me bear a child. For the price of trying to bring back my stillborn son.”

“You had a son? What happened to him?”

“He turned into Wrath. When you perform human transmutation, you create a homunculus. That’s what he is. He isn’t human.” Izumi’s tone was heavy, the weight of her past choices etched into her every word.

“How come you never told me this?”

“You have painful memories too, things that are hard to talk about.”

Determination burned brightly in his eyes. “And you were afraid of me trying to bring Ed back. But I’d never! I still think he’s out there somewhere! I won’t give up until I find him!”

“I won’t live long enough to see him.”

“Don’t speak that way, Ms. Izumi! You’ll be fine. You’ll get to see him again, I’m sure of it!”

Chapter Text

Edward tossed and turned.

Noah appeared in his dim room and knelt beside his bed.

“Can’t sleep?” he asked her.

“Not a wink,” she admitted. “I was wondering where Alfons disappeared to.”

“He said his grandma got sick, and he wanted to take care of her. It seemed sudden.”

“Oh.”

Edward broke the awkward silence. “What’d you come here for? Surely it wasn’t just to ask about Alfons.”

“Back there on the road.”

“Hm?”

“You said I’ve stolen your heart.”

A low grumble escaped him. The girl he liked was too close to turn away from. For an eternity, he stared blankly at the ceiling.

He turned to face her once more. “It’s true. You have.”

Noah reached out and ran her fingers through his hair. The intensity of her gaze held him captive. Suddenly, she stood and bolted to his drawer.

“Those aren’t done!” He tripped over himself, trying to stop her, but it was already too late.

Clutched in her hands was his beloved sketchbook. Her eyes fell over an oil painting of a blond boy with golden eyes. “Is this you?”

“It’s my brother. I don’t wanna forget him, so I painted this.” Finally, he was sharing more of his past with her.

Her warmth brought reassurance. “He’s adorable.”

“Well, he is my brother.” He smiled a soft smile. Speaking his heart made things much easier. The weight lifted off his chest.

“You’re very talented.”

“Staying in your room will do that.” He laughed and clasped her hands in his. “I’m glad you showed me around.”

She turned to a page with a majestic suit of armor and froze. “This armor...”

“It’s the one I bound his soul to.”

“I’ve seen it before.”

“You have? Where?”

“I shouldn’t say...”

He gripped her shoulders. “Does it have to do with them? Did they threaten you?”

She averted her gaze. “No, I’m fine. Don’t worry.”

“You’re lying.”

“So what if I am? I have no family, no one who cares except for you and Alfons. My parents died years ago.”

“I didn’t know that.”

“You never asked.”

“I’m asking now! I spilled my guts to you earlier, so now it’s your turn! How can I prove I care about you?!”

The warmth between them faded while she stepped away. “I’m going to bed. I shouldn’t have come. Goodnight.”

Edward sighed as she left. He fell backwards onto his bed. How’d such a promising night end so miserably?

He was a clueless fool.

Chapter Text

Izumi shivered in a hospital bed. Paralysis still took hold of her once powerful muscles. A look of agony twisted her face as a tear fell down her cheek.

Sig knelt by her side. He gripped her hand fiercely. His eyes twitched but stayed dry.

Alphonse said the words he’d always shunned: “If Ed’s gone… if you see him, give him a hug for me, okay?”

Sweat trickled down her forehead as she nodded. With her free hand, she gestured to Wrath. The boy scowled at the floor while he stomped in. 

She smoothed her son’s hair and smiled weakly at him. “I’m sorry I couldn’t give you a life.” The words came in a hushed whisper. Seconds later, she surrendered to darkness.

Tears welled in Winry’s eyes. “She’s left us… how can this be real?”

Sig let go of Izumi’s hand. His warmth spread to Winry’s shoulder instead. “Thanks for being there for her.”

She buried her face in his chest and sobbed. The intensity of her cries prompted him to embrace her. Shielded by her fatherly figure, she was safe from curious looks.

Alphonse’s blank stare fixed on the world outside. Behind the window, rain poured as thunder screeched. Summer was supposed to bring happiness and warmth.

But so far, the season had only brought sadness and death.

Chapter Text

The projector glowed on the university classroom wall. It showed a rocket going up in the air. The missile didn’t go far up in the sky before coming back down.

The university program’s wish was to go into space. They longed to build a rocket that stayed in the air, carried its own weight as it soared past the planets. The technology here made it seem like it could’ve been possible. 

The day dragged on. Edward sat at the back of the class so he got a full view of the sea of students and the projector. The idea of space was a goal worth pursuing, an endless expanse waiting to be explored. Why not take advantage of his love for books and earn a degree, considering he could be stuck here forever? If he ever made it back, would his degree still count for anything?

Knowledge was powerful because nobody could ever steal it. He was here at the university for knowledge. So who cared if the degree was useless?

He still got something out of class.

Without meaning to, he remembered the night he last saw Noah. With his nose in a book, he pictured the look she’d gotten when he’d pressed her for details on her past. He’d never forget how freeing it was to let himself be, even just for a moment.

She was the one who’d set him free. She’d showed him the vibrant city, with lights, laughter, and music everywhere. The only thing that made him think staying here instead of going home wasn’t the worst idea was her. And he couldn’t help but wonder if anything they had shared even meant anything anymore.

That night, she left, and he hadn’t seen her since. He might’ve never laid eyes on her again for as long as he lived. Sure, he could just go home and pretend she never existed.

But would she forget him, too?

“You and Alfons are the best students imaginable! Too bad he’s in the hospital.”

Edward’s voice was grave. “What?”

“You didn’t know?”

Edward hastily slung his bag over his shoulder and hurried towards the door.

“Where are you going?” the professor asked. “You never leave early.”

“Where do you think I’m going?! I have to go check on him!”

Edward bolted to his car. He revved the engine and sped off. With the sun blazing overhead, his heart pounded in his ears.

As he raced into the hospital, the sickening scent of antiseptic filled the air. The bright lights reflected off the white walls. Thin curtains were the only thing separating the rooms.

Alfons’ already pale skin and hair looked bleached as he sat up in bed. Sunken cheeks replaced his once full ones, and dark circles sat under his golden eyes. “Ed! What are you doing here?” he cried, his voice hoarse and strained.

“I heard you were sick!” Edward reached out and put the back of his hand on his friend’s feverish forehead. “Why didn’t you tell me?!”

Alfons shrugged. “Sorry. In my defense, it’s not like you can cure me.”

“But you scared the shit out of me, you know that?! You’ve been gone for a while now, so when I heard the news, I was expecting the worst!” Edward sat on the stool beside Alfons’ cot. “So, what’s wrong with you?”

Alfons turned his tired gaze towards Edward and forced a faint smile. “They aren’t sure yet. They ran a bunch of tests, but they still weren’t able to figure it out. My head is pounding, I can’t eat, and I can barely catch my breath.”

He pointed at the IV in his arm. “And these meds are no help at all. The entire time I’ve been here, I haven’t gotten any better. But don’t worry about me. I’m fine, really.”

Edward’s tearful eyes met Alfons’ while he rested his hand on his shoulder. “You’re gonna be okay. I promise.”

Alfons looked away. “I hope so… Listen, don’t tell Noah I’m sick. I don’t want her to worry.”

Edward smiled, but it was a sad one. “I couldn’t even if I wanted to. I haven’t seen her around lately.”

Alfons’ brows furrowed as worry filled his eyes. “Oh. Is she alright?”

“Who knows? I’ll tell you as soon as I find something out.”

“Could you check if the professor will let you bring me my assignments?”

“No way, you need to rest! School can wait!”

“But it’s boring here…”

“No kidding.” Edward stood and grabbed his bag. He headed for the door.

Alfons gripped Edward’s arm. “Wait, where are you going?! You just got here!”

“We’re going to space, remember? So I have to go home and study enough for both of us!” Edward stepped back and pulled Alfons into a tight hug. “I’ll see you tomorrow. Try to hang in there until then.”

Alfons sighed and returned his embrace. “Okay. See you tomorrow, Ed.”

Chapter Text

As Alphonse gazed into his closet, his eyes fell upon the suit he’d worn to his mother’s funeral. Staring at it brought back the same hunger, coldness, and emptiness. Even though the suit was too small for him now, it brought back a flood of memories.

Sitting in front of the mirror, he fidgeted. He bit down hard on his lip hard to fight back his tears. What was the point of them?

There was a knock on the door. Winry came in. She had on a black dress with the pattern of a black rose embroidered across the front, and flat, black shoes. All the darkness made her blonde hair look even lighter. “Are you ready to go?”

He nodded even though he’d never be ready to say goodbye to Izumi.

Winry led him to the front, where Grandma sat at the table. She rubbed her forehead with one hand and held a cup of hot tea in the other. When she saw them coming, she stood fast, smoothed her wrinkled skirt, and sputtered something to herself.

Wordlessly, she went to Alphonse and linked her arm with his. They trudged to the porch, where Sig waited. He was on Grandma’s wooden rocking chair with a dark hat on his slumped head. Despite what was going on, he seemed as stoic as always. The four of them walked all the way to the church by the graveyard.

Alphonse numbed as the service began. He blocked out what was said until Sig overtook the small stage. The man always looked emotionless, and hardly spoke except in low, quick grunts. But now, as he spoke of his wife, his voice was loud and clear. There was an unmistakable pain stitched into his face Alphonse had never seen before. 

It showed how strong the love between them was.

Once Sig finished his speech, all the family and friends filed into a line to give their final goodbyes. The line snaked around the room, starting at the shiny bronze casket that stood front and center. Its doors were opened.

Alphonse tensed up at the realization that Izumi was inside. He’d already seen her laying still at the hospital, but this was different. Back then, she’d at least been able to smile, even if it was fake. Now, the Izumi that laid in front of him was dead. She couldn’t smile, laugh, or say anything to lighten the mood. She couldn’t hug him, scold him, or teach him any new skills. So she wasn’t Izumi at all. 

She was only a cold reminder of someone he’d once loved. 

He breathed a heavy sigh and forced himself to step forward in line. What would she tell him if she knew he wanted to run and hide? She’d yell at him, tell him not to make a scene. So instead of running to the corner and sobbing, he shoved down all the emotions that bubbled up while his heart pounded in anticipation. 

When it was his turn to see her, he held onto the casket’s polished wood while his legs threatened to give out from under him. He hadn’t realized he’d had his eyes clenched tightly shut. Slowly, he opened them. Centuries passed while he stood there, taking in the most minor details of her lifeless features. 

The dark circles under her eyes were darker than they’d been in life. Her skin was whiter than the chipped paint peeling from the church’s walls. Her lips were purple, and they formed a hard, thin line. 

If only she could’ve kept the smile she’d had right before she’d died.

The number of family and friends at the funeral dwindled to a party of four. While the others spoke, Alphonse snuck out of the back door. He walked all the way back home and went straight to his room. He slipped Edward’s red jacket over his black suit. With a canteen full of cold water in hand, he promptly left through the door.

Though the afternoon air outside was warm, he shivered with cold. Without Izumi, the world got colder, just like he’d imagined. Without direction or concern, he wandered aimlessly. 

He’d been wandering for a while when noticed a broken radio lying in the road. As he clapped his hands together, a burst of energy flooded the air. Blue sparks flew past.

Within seconds, the radio was scratch-free, as if it’d never been battered at all.

Roy looked awestruck. “Such talent! But I shouldn’t be surprised. Isn’t that Fullmetal?”

Riza shook her head. “That’s his little brother, Alphonse. Remember him?”

“Mmh. But I’ve never seen him in the flesh. They look exactly alike.”

“No kidding.”

Alphonse pulled up his hood and headed in the opposite direction.

Roy’s footsteps echoed behind him. “Wait, kid! Have you ever considered becoming a state alchemist?”

Alphonse turned and scoffed. “Why would I? What’s in it for me?”

“You’ll put your skills to good use,” Roy said at his desk. 

Alphonse had allowed himself to be whisked to his office. His arms were crossed tightly over his chest. “So what? I’ll become a dog of the military.”

Roy sounded careless. “What’s so wrong with that? I’ve devoted my life to service, and I haven’t regretted it for a second. Look at it this way: if you join, we might help you find Edward.”

Alphonse’s spark of anger melted away. “I still don’t know. I’ll think about it and tell you when I’ve decided.”

At the kitchen table, Grandma nearly spilled steaming tea in her lap. “What’s this madness? Who put the idea of becoming one of their lap dogs into your head?”

 “Mustang.”

“When you see him again, be sure to tell him the answer is no. I won’t let another one of my grandchildren join the bastards who killed my daughter. Besides, you’re only thirteen.”

“How old was Ed when he became a state alchemist?” he asked.

After taking a long swig, she finished her tea. “Eleven. I tried to talk him out of it, but of course a fool like him didn’t listen.”

“Grandma, this isn’t your choice to make. It’s mine.” He tried to have a mature air about him, like he was older, more grown up. “I’ve decided I’ll take a chance and join them. You see, Ed did the same for me. He joined the military for my sake. I should return the favor. I’m dumb and reckless, like him. 

I have no clue what I’m doing. All I know is that I’ll do whatever it takes to fix my mistakes.”

“What a speech.” Grandma gave a slow nod with shut eyes. “You’re definitely his little brother.”

“Everyone says that since we look just alike. Don’t we?”

Nostalgia and love filled her voice. “You have your mother’s smile. But that spark in your eye when you’re determined? It’s Ed’s.”

Chapter Text

Edward’s sketchbook patiently waited at his desk. There, he hastily painted a portrait of Alfons. Without meaning to, he added every sickly detail of his friend’s face. Those pale cheeks that were sinking in. His white skin that was tinged green.

Tears blended with the paint bleeding into canvas. Soon, the picture was a bright blur. He shoved the art aside and became a wailing mess.

Summer was way colder than usual.

The next day, once classes were over, Edward fulfilled his promise and walked into the hospital. After knocking on Alfons’ door, he went in carrying something wrapped in paper.

“What’s that?” Alfons asked.

Without a word, Edward set the paper on the table and brought out two perfect slices of strawberry shortcake. He handed one to Alfons and took a seat while he chomped on the other. 

“Shortcake?” Alfons reluctantly took a bite. “You have some strange eating habits.”

Edward considered making a comeback, but all that came out of his mouth was a sigh. His friend looked even worse than he had just the day before. His eyes were red, his skin was as pale as the white sheets on his bed, and he wasn’t his usual cheery self.

He pushed that down as he let the sweet strawberry syrup and vanilla flood his tongue. That’d make them happy. While you’re eating sweets, you’re happy, right?

The shortcake was a great choice. 

No matter how hard he tried, his voice couldn’t cover up the worry that filled it. “How are you feeling today?”

“Fine,” Alfons answered in a sharp voice. “Everything’s fine.”

“You sure?”

“Positive.”

Edward’s words stumbled out in a jumbled mess. “Have the meds worked? Did your headache go away? How have the nurses been treating you here? Are they annoying, or are they alright?”

“For the first question, no. For the other one, sometimes, but I can handle it. They’re no worse than my mom used to be when I got sick.”

“Which was how?”

“Overbearing.”

“Kind of like I am right now, huh?”

Alfons said nothing, just sat there, staring at the floor. He shook his head and asked, “Any news on where Noah is?”

Edward had the same sad smile as yesterday. “No. I haven’t seen her in weeks, even though I thought she cared for me.”

Alfons’ brows furrowed. “What did she say or do that made you think that?”

Edward stared out of the window dreamily. “The way she talked to me, and smiled. But it was just a temporary thing. She’s closed up. The moment you try to get her to spill her secrets, she’s gone. That’s stranger than shortcake.”

“Maybe she’s got a romantic side. Maybe she’s not quite right. But if you love her, you have to try to understand her.”

“I guess you’re right.”

He itched to learn more about how Alfons was doing. To ask about the pain, the bloodstains on his hospital gown, about whether he’d ever recover. But seeing the fear in his friend’s golden eyes, he bit all those questions back. While they chatted, he tried his best to shift as much focus away from his friend’s illness as possible. 

It was the only way to keep the faith.

Chapter Text

Edward sat at his desk in the university classroom. The sheet of paper in front of him was blank except for a few math equations he’d scribbled. Even though they were a rocket’s dimensions, he couldn’t bring himself to care about them.

Then he remembered what he’d said to Alfons the day before yesterday: “I have to study enough for the both of us!” 

Hastily, he rubbed the sleep from his eyes and refocused. Later, he could swing by the hospital and hand Alfons his assignments, just to distract him from being sick. He’d been against it at first, but now he’d do anything in his power to boost his friend’s mood. No matter what, he’d definitely have to give him an update on the progress the class was making on the rocket. 

If Alfons didn’t survive, the two of them wouldn’t be able to go to space together. He fought the urge to slap himself. How could he even let the thought of Alfons dying cross his mind?

In this world, they weren’t brothers, but the fact that they’d found each other meant something. It meant that their love for each other was so strong, they could find each other in any world. No matter what, he couldn’t let Alfons slip away like sand through his fingers. If he succeeded in going to space, his friend might be so glad that he’d be cured. 

That was a childish way of thinking, but he had to hold on to every last shred of hope. 

The afternoon air was suffocatingly humid as Edward strode down the busy road. While passing the flower shop, a sweet, deep voice rose above the car horns and chatter. First, he froze, then hid behind the whitewashed brick. The scent of lilac filled his nose as he peered inside.

The little shop looked like a meadow. It overflowed with sunny flowers in every shade. Noah was in the back corner by a window, watering violets. She was wearing a soft blue dress that matched her pure gold necklace perfectly. Her loose hair wasn’t hidden under a veil, which allowed him to admire its thick brown curls. “There’ll be another war?”

The owner smiled as she planted a bright blend of white lilies and red roses. A typical German woman, she had dark blonde bangs and warm brown eyes. “Mmh. So it might be trouble for you, gypsy. I’ve appreciated your help, but we have to say goodbye. It’s nothing against you. It’s just to keep us out of trouble.”

Edward gritted his teeth when the florist called the girl he liked that awful word the soldiers spat. She seemed sincere, but there was no way to know for sure whether her words were true. Though she’d shown her kindness, she still saw her as little more than a gypsy, and Roma, despite being good for running shops, as troublesome.

The tears in Noah’s eyes caught the light and gleamed. “Thank you for being so kind to me. Despite having no reason to trust me, you still did.”

The florist’s hands rested on her shoulders. “Don’t cry. You’ll survive.”

She nodded and trudged out of the small building. The look she wore was one he’d never seen from her before. It was a mix of sadness, betrayal, and disappointment. Worst of all, there wasn’t a smidgen of surprise. As she neared where he hid, he turned and started off for his car. 

In a hurry, she made her way towards him. “Ed! Wait!”

The sound of his footsteps suddenly stopped, leaving silence behind. With his back turned, he whispered, “Don’t be so loud. Want a repeat of that day? I’m going home, so I won’t be around to help you if they try something.”

“I’m sorry for disappearing like that. I wanted to tell you I’m not hiding anything serious from you.”

“So? You’re still hiding something. Maybe all those things they say about you aren’t so wrong after all.”

Mom had always described him as hot-tempered, quick to anger, and that rashness shone through at the worst possible moments. Now the words he’d said had built a wall. For an eternity, he stood there staring into the road, unable to face the mess he’d made.

Arriving at his car, Edward unlocked both doors. Warmth spread across his cheeks while Noah settled beside him. The engine roared as he sped off.

Another silence fell. People in town glared. To avoid meeting their gazes, he kept his eyes ahead.

He reached the lot near home. Between two volkswagens, he found a spot to park. Hearing the blaring screech of police sirens, they ran inside.

A sigh escaped him while he slammed the door. When she embraced him, the rapid racing of his heartbeat slowed. In her arms, he thought of the florist’s last words, and prayed that they were true.

“I’m sorry for pushing you away before,” she said.

“I’m sorry too,” he murmured. “I shouldn’t have said what they say about you is true. I didn’t mean it. And I shouldn’t have pushed you to tell me about your past if you weren’t ready. Can we start over?”

Chapter Text

Winry twirled in front of the mirror. Strapped to her waist was a new tool belt. The wrenches, nuts, and bolts shone and shimmered. An automail mechanic’s tool belt was an essential. “You don’t seem to be doing much studying,” she said.

“It’s coming along well enough,” Alphonse lied. 

“I could help you study if you want.”

He shook his head, yawned, and turned to another page. More than ever these days, he was exhausted. Sometimes he’d drift to sleep in the middle of the day, and not wake up until moonlight shone through his window. In his dreams, he’d shudder in a hospital bed not so different from Izumi’s, and suffer coughing fits where he hacked up ribbons of blood.

He’d wake up at home, with the weight on his chest gone. The air that’d been cold enough to chill his bones had warmed. The overwhelming smell of medicine and the groggy voices loudly moaning in pain had also disappeared.

What had the dreams meant? Maybe that he feared death after watching Izumi die, just as Mom had. Maybe the pain of losing her was making him sick.

Things would be easier if she was here, or maybe it was better that she wasn’t. She’d be disappointed to find out he was becoming a dog of the military. How could it be better that she wasn’t here? 

He resubmerged himself in the books, reading the same lines again and again, until he fought the urge to hurl them out the window. The headache he’d had in his dreams seeped into waking reality. He rubbed his forehead and forced himself to keep on reading, reading, reading.

Practice makes perfect. He should’ve been practicing instead of sitting with his nose in these books. Since he and Edward had always practiced together with Izumi, practicing alchemy drew him closer to them. Instead of being a world apart, the three of them were back in her backyard, fixing broken vases, listening to songs on the radio, and laughing about silly things. When he did alchemy, his heart was complete; overflowing with memories of his wonderful family.

“She’d be glad that you’re working so hard,” Winry said. “Promise you’ll put what she taught you to good use and do your best on the exam.”

“I promise,” he replied.

Winry stared out the window. Alphonse gazed too. The storm had cleared. Now the sun shimmered more brightly than it had the entire season.

Even without Edward, summer still held the promise of hope.

Chapter Text

“We can,” Noah said. “But… why would you say that?”

“I got mad because…” Edward began. “I was thinking you weren’t ever coming back.”

“Of course I was coming back! I just got caught up in something important.”

“Important?” He exited her arms and cried, “You could’ve told me! Alfons and I were worried sick.”

“I know.” Running a hand through her hair, she sighed. “I just didn’t know how to explain it. I was researching rockets. I wanted to help you and Elias with the project. I thought I could find out something to improve its design, it’d make a difference.”

“You disappeared for two weeks to do… research? You could’ve just told me you were busy! We could’ve done it together!”

Noah wrapped her arms around herself. “I didn’t want to pull you away from your work. I thought I could dive into this research and come back with a breakthrough. But then I lost track of time and felt ashamed to come back with no big findings.”

He stepped closer, closing the space between them. “Noah, I care about you. Not just what you can bring to the project.”

“I know,” she replied, choking on her words. “I always knew.”

“Let’s put this behind us and start fresh. We have a rocket to build, and I want you by my side every step of the way.”

“Alright,” she said, squeezing his hand. “And we can have some adventures along the way?”

“Of course.” He grinned and squeezed her hand back. “I wouldn’t miss it.”