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“I don’t get it,” followed by an irresistible pout.
“Don’t get what?” a shuffle of clothes and closing of a book.
“Why does everyone think that ‘love at first sight’ is the most romantic thing ever? I’m not saying that it doesn’t exist or can’t happen, I’ve had it happen before, but it’s not that romantic.”
“Love at first sight with inanimate objects doesn’t count, that’s why your encounters haven’t been romantic.”
“It was not (only) with inanimate objects!” look of indignation. “I’ve had other encounters and they haven’t been romantic. Don’t feed me lines about it being ‘the one true love’ either. There’s more than enough love in the world to go around, why do you have to reserve it for only one person. Besides, what if one of them dies, the other never gets to love again? Or everyone after that just isn’t as special?”
“That’s quite a loaded statement. Which do you want to talk about? I think I can only handle one discussion at a time,” a teasing smile makes its presence known.
“My first question then, why is love at first sight romantic?”
“Love at first sight is romantic, because it suggests the possibility of finding and knowing the one that’s right for you. Knowing that it is the right person right away, as if fate determined it to be so, and loving that person without the façade presented during courtship. Or at least that’s what I get from my dongsaeng.”
“So what you’re saying is that it’s romantic that the person finds ‘the one’ that’s right for them and can love them without trying to impress them with a fake image later on. Right? Doesn’t that just make it unrequited love? I mean lots of people can fall in love with us, because we’re famous, but that’s not romantic. In fact, it’s sometimes downright scary and creepy the level of ‘love’ our fans have for us.”
“Well, I don’t think it has to be requited to be romantic. I mean picture someone who spends all his time taking care of the one he loves while that person is…in a coma or something. You can’t say that the unconscious person is giving love back, but it doesn’t make the caretaker’s love any less dedicated. You can perform many acts of love without it being reciprocated, but it isn’t any less romantic.”
“Yes, but why would you fall in love at first sight with an unconscious person? Unless you’re into corpses. If that’s the case, then you should seek some professional help. Trying to romance a comatose person is just…” Jaejoong sticks out a tongue in disgust.
“That’s beside the point. I think ‘love at first sight’ is supposed to be romantic, because it’s a love without pretenses. You can love a person before knowing what they’re willing to do or, in today’s society, willing to spend on you.”
“That’s only true if you loved some ugly, smelly hobo!”
“What?! Why would that be the case?” an exasperated Yunho sputters.
“Well isn’t it? I mean you don’t know anything about the other person except how they looked. So unless you loved an ugly hobo, you’re just basing your love on the way the other person looks or dresses. It’s all about the status that the other person can give you, whether it be in riches or looks. That’s not romantic at all. In fact, that’s just highly superficial!”
“Well, you do have to be attracted to a person to fall in love with them. Of course the outside package will be taken into consideration, but that’s not all falling in love is about.”
“So you’re saying that it’s ‘lust at first sight’ that develops into love? Then it can’t really be called ‘love at first sight’ can it? If you find someone hot, and then get to know them to fall in love with them.”
“Well, I mean look at Romeo and Juliet. They had love at first sight to the extent that they were willing to die for their love. It can happen, it’s just…rare. The rarity of it is also what makes it romantic.”
“Romeo and Juliet are fictional characters! They aren’t a real example of ‘love at first sight’. But just for the sake of argument, we’ll consider them. They were just a pair of hormonal teenagers that had overdramatic relatives.”
“I can’t believe you just summarized one of the greatest love stories into that!”
“Well I mean it’s true. I’ll retell the story in modern terms and you tell me how romantic it ends up. So Romeo gets rejected at the beginning by a pretty girl Rose, or something. He decides to mend his broken heart and suicidal thoughts by crashing a costume party with his cousins. At the party, he gets drunk and wants to feel up on the next pretty girl he can get. Enter Juliet and her beauty. Romeo ‘falls in love’ because she’s so hot, superficial, and can’t wait to get cozy with her. He then dances with the hottie, but doesn’t get to go any further than that, because Juliet’s a tease. He and his friends are then kicked out of the party by her cousin for crashing the party of their company rivals.
“Juliet realizes that the young Romeo is a much better alternative to the old guy her parents want to merge businesses with and jumps ship while she still can. The fact that Romeo’s kind of hot too helps her cause and she decides to elope with Romeo.
“Instead of leaving when he was asked to, Romeo does the stalker thing, and watches for Juliet to come out of her room so he can see her again. She comes out to her balcony, which Romeo trespasses on and they swear their love for each other, Romeo’s probably under the influence of alcohol and Juliet’s escaping her parent’s control of her life (teenage rebellion you know?). They plan to get married the next day and Romeo climbs back down the balcony once he’s sober again.
“The next day, Juliet’s cousin looks for Romeo to kick his ass, for crashing the party. Romeo is a no show, since he’s still sleeping off the hang-over. When he gets up, he decides he needs to get some ass and sees a priest. Since Juliet won’t let him plow her without being married, he gets the priest to see his side of the story and sends word to Juliet to meet him at the church to get married.
“So they get married and the first thing out of his mouth is to arrange to meet in her bedroom that night so they can get some action on. Realizing he didn’t have a bachelor’s party, he rounds up his boys to prowl the town, only to run into Juliet’s cousin. Tybalt tries to kick Romeo’s ass, but his homies got his back and ends up getting killed. He kills Tybalt to avenge his friend.
“Romeo gets caught and gets banished, but he still hasn’t gotten laid. Juliet hears of this and is sad, since this ruins her plans. Romeo, realizing he’s never going to get laid by Juliet, attempts to kill himself, but is stopped by the priest. He comes up with a plan for the two hormonal teenagers to both leave the city, so he can finally have some peace, and sends Romeo to Juliet’s room to get laid. He gets laid, finally, and then has to leave before Juliet’s parents find out. Juliet’s parents tell her she’s going to marry the old man so they can finally merge businesses. Juliet then threatens to kill herself instead of marrying the old geezer, but her parents chalk it up to teenage drama.
“Juliet then visits the priest to remake her plans to escape her parents and the priest gives her a drug that will knock her out for two days. The priest can’t contact Romeo, due to bad reception, so Romeo is still clueless, as always. Juliet takes the drug later that night and falls into ‘death’ to be buried. Conveniently, Romeo’s phone decides to work again, so he finds out that Juliet has ‘died’.
“Romeo decides to risk capture and visit Juliet’s grave, she must have been great in bed or something! There he sees the old geezer that Juliet was supposed to marry trying to violate her corpse. He beats the necrophiliac to death before convincing himself he’s not also a necrophiliac for wanting to violate the corpse himself since Juliet’s still hot even in ‘death’. Finding his thoughts disturbing, because wanting to violate a corpse (even a hot one) is just all kinds of wrong, especially when sober. So, Romeo decides to off himself, since he’s convinced that he won’t ever have anyone better than a (hot) corpse, and that is truly depressing.
“Juliet’s drugs wear off and she wakes up to two corpses next to her. Well shit, there go her plans of running off with Romeo. Since she can’t exactly just walk out and leave, being ‘dead’ and all, her only option is ‘real death’, as opposed to her ‘fake death’. So, she kisses Romeo one last time, she’s a bit of a necrophiliac too, and then stabs herself.
“Juliet’s family comes down to see if the old geezer is done violating, uh…paying his respects to his fiancée, so that they can continue with their business deal. They’re surprised to find the additional bodies and their daughter who had apparently died again. Tough luck for them, the old geezer is no longer around to sign the necessary papers. They decide instead to become business partners with Romeo’s family since they’re both pretty big companies and can split the funeral costs of another funeral. The end. So, like I said—overly hormonal teenagers, greedy parents, overdramatic relatives, and a couple of necrophiliacs. In what universe is that the most romantic love story of all time?”
Yunho pinches the bridge of his nose trying to wrap his head around the rendition of the Shakespearean classic Jaejoong just butchered. “You know what,” a sigh “you win, ‘love at first sight’ isn’t romantic. Just please never tell another Shakespearean story to me, I think this one might stay with me for awhile.”
“Just as I thought. There’s nothing romantic about ‘love at first sight’. It’s all just a superficial hormonal reaction to an attractive person!”
“Whatever you say, Jae.”
“Why do you not sound convinced? Do you still think ‘love at first sight’ is romantic? Even after all that I just told you?!”
“I think it can be romantic for those that experience and believe. As outsiders, we can look on others and make judgments, but as actual participants, the feelings would be vastly different. Whatever it is that makes you attracted to the other first, lust, infatuation, it doesn’t matter as long as it persists into love. That persistence of whatever it was at first sight, that’s love. Otherwise, it would just be a passing crush, nothing special. But whatever it is that makes a person hold tenaciously onto the other, that’s the romance. It’s rare, but if it happens to you, you wouldn’t doubt it.”
“Speaking from experience? It sounds like you know a lot of what you’re talking about.”
“Perhaps…I’m just much wiser than you,” and Yunho runs off with a yelling Jaejoong at his heels.