Archive of Our Own

Nicky Hemmick is always smiling. Smiling was easy. Easier than thinking about the camp, or his parents, or the past year of bullshit entirely. He was happy to see his baby cousins getting along, that they were getting help from Bee and that they were both in happy relationships. Nicky’s own relationship was one of the best things in his life. Erik was everything to him and he was everything to Erik. The two of them were planning on getting married after he and the twins graduated and Nicky was free to move back to Germany. They hadn’t told the twins yet, Nicky afraid of how they would react and Erik knowing it wasn’t his place to tell them.

After the past year's shit show, he just wanted to see his cousins and teammates happy. Letting them know the reason for his trip to Georgia August for 2 weeks was out of the question. He would keep that part of his life from them as long as he could, everyone on the team always said he was loose lipped and couldn’t keep a secret to save his life. But in reality, he keeps many secrets from them. Half truths about his teen years, going to church “camp” for a year, the full extent of how Erik saved his life, who he was before his year at camp, before Germany, before he became his cousins’ legal guardian.

The twins knew he had other family on his mother’s side and that he was in contact with them but the two were never interested in learning more and Nicky didn’t want to tell them.

When he was 14 Nicky had spent his freshman year in Alto, Georgia with his cousins Taylor and Tyler Hernandez. His aunt needed an extra hand around the house and Nicky practically jumped at the opportunity to get out of his parents’ house. His conflicting thoughts of homosexuality were overwhelming and he hoped a change of scenery and environment would help, and it did.
His cousins, aunt, and friends he made while in Alto helped him start to come into himself. Their support meant everything to him. But coming into his sexuality and being proud of it came later when he met Erik and wasn’t fighting for survival. Between phantoms, weird totally illegal science agencies, and crazy church homophobes, Nicky was just trying to make it to the other side. He wanted to survive just one more day.

He practically gave up during his junior year of high school, but when his teacher saw him struggling and gave him an out to Germany his fight to keep going was renewed just a little bit more. Being unable to talk to his cousins since he left them at the end of freshman year because his parents saw them as “sinners” and a bad influence. They weren’t, and still aren’t, but his parents didn’t care. They only saw them as enablers to his sinful ways and when they found out Tyler was bi and dating a man, it only served to solidify their disgust. Only once Nicky was in Germany and not on the verge of suicide did he finally contact the Hernandez twins, and in turn the rest of the School Bus Graveyard crew.

Time seemed to fly by over the years and when Nicky returned to the states to take care of his younger cousins, the SBG crew was there to support him. Support them. But they understood why Nicky wanted to keep that part of his life separate from the two heavily traumatized and newly orphaned Minyard twins. Nicky never wanted to tell the twins that he took help and money from people they had never met and probably never will, because he didn’t want to hear a lecture from them. Still didn’t, but he might have to. Years ago after escaping the facility with help from the feds, a deal was made.

While they couldn’t keep the story under wraps, they could keep their names out of it until they all turned 25, giving them around a decade of anonymity before the full story was released. Names, locations, the experiments, everything. No more, “We’re waiting until the surviving victims are above age” and “To protect their and their families privacy, we are waiting until all victims are of an age and position to handle the situation in a public light.” In less than a week Nicky would be turning 25, the last of the group of seven to reach that age, and the full story was to be released. He had told Wymak that in less than a week a news story was gonna be released about him as the nda for it was coming to a close and he would be hiding out from the backlash and press with some family.

Not his parents he assured Coach, and no “Aaron and Andrew don’t know, so please don’t tell them. All they know is I’m going on a camping trip with some cousins from my mother’s side that I’m still close with. I’ll be gone for 2 weeks for sure. Buttttt depending on the public’s reaction to the story I might be gone longer.”

“Christ kid, what kid of bullshit have you gotten yourself into?” Wymak demanded.

“Nothing pretty, that's for sure. Not like I or any one else involved wanted it either but with me turning 25 the shit show gets to finally come into the public spotlight.”

“Just make sure to take care of yourself and not cause any trouble. I don’t want to find out you got into a fight and or somehow ended up in jail. I’ve already had enough of that with the rest of you monsters, I don’t need it from you too.”

“Don’t worry Coach, I’ve always been the good one.” Nicky grinned and shot finger guns at the unamused exy coach who in response let out a tired sigh.

“Don’t make me regret this. And don’t come whiny to me when Kevin and Niel get on your case for missing practice.”

“No promises!” He laughed and stood up from the chair and stretched out. “I should be getting a ride after practice, so don’t be alarmed when I get into a stranger's car.”

“I won’t call the cops but I might tell Andrew.” Wymak replied.

Nicky shot him a horrified look and sputtered. “Don’t you dare! Promise me coach, don’t tell him. Or anyone. I gotta do it-“

“Yeah well” Wymak cut him off before he started to ramble again. “You didn’t and still haven’t. And I know for certain that you ain’t gonna tell them until you come crawling back in a few weeks when whatever this shit storm is finally blows over.” Nicky looked down at his feet, slightly ashamed and guilty. He didn’t want to tell the twins, didn’t even tell his own parents. Who would believe him? Well he would be believed soon once the video footage was also released.

The seven of them had all been surprised to find there was video footage, not only from the facility, but also from the hospital where Tyler was treated, footage from the school and Aiden’s house (his parents instantly video cameras the day they found out about the whole mess in case something happened to the kids and they weren’t there), and from a few other places they’ve brought the Phantom realm closer to the normal one. None of them thought the Phantoms could be caught on camera, let alone summoning them or the “becoming” thing they did with the realm. While it was freakier to see it in person, it was still pretty freaky to see in on video. They also didn’t think about camera footage at all but that’s besides the point.

“I wanted to keep this away from them for as long as I could. They got their own shit to deal with and I never wanted to add to it. Even more so after what happened with Andrew.” That night had only added to the already concrete wall that he wanted to keep his business his own. Only telling bits and pieces of his past and life story, making it seem a lot better than it actually was. Even so, it was still pretty shitty.

“They’ll be pissed I kept this from them and honestly? I don’t regret it. My shit is my shit, I kept it from them as long as I could. Even if I had told them, which I wouldn’t have-“

“I got that Nicky.”

“I’m just saying! Anyways, even if I had told them, they wouldn’t have believed me and I wasn’t and still aren't inclined to prove it to them.”

“I’m sure they would’ve believed you.”

“Have you met them?” Nicky raised an eyebrow at the man who sighed in resignation.

“I suppose you’re right. Now get out of my sight and changed for practice. I expect 110% from you today to make up for missing two weeks.”

“Got it Coach!” He grinned his trademark grin and booked it out of the office before Wymak could add anything more on top of his workout for today. He was halfway through changing, the others waiting for him in the foyer to start the pre-practice meeting when Wymak yelled at him to come out. “Almost done, Coach, give me a second!” He called back with a laugh and kept the same pace, strapping one of his leg bracers into place.

“Now! Someone claiming to be your cousin is here!” Wymack sounded slightly irritated, probably because of the twins. He thought absently minded before his words truly hit him. And once they did Nicky was off like a bullet. Running out of the changing room, not caring that he was only half dressed in gear, or caring about the looks his teammates and coach sent him as he raced past them and down the hallways towards the entrance.

Pushing open the door he looked around but spotted a familiar car, but no cousin. Where is he? He whipped his head back and forth before running back inside and into the foyer, stopping to ask an exasperated looking coach “where?” Wymak raised an unimpressed eyebrow at him and stepped aside. Behind him was Tyler, looking very amused.

“

Ty!” Nicky beamed and launched himself over the couch, one that had Matt and the girls on it, causing Allison, who was sitting solo, to choke. This was the most athletic thing, outside of exy, any of his teammates have seen him do. “You’re early!”

Upon reaching his elder cousin he hugged him tightly. Tyler was taller than him, only by a few inches, but those few inches made Nicky feel small. Other than Matt, he was the tallest member of the Foxes and it had been so long to have someone hold him tightly and with love.

Erik was away in Germany and no one on the Foxes would hug him or love him the way he desperately craved. To be the family that loved him just as much as he loved them. “We wanted to surprise you but I was the only one able to escape Aiden’s grubby hands.”

“What do you mean?” He asked, not pulling back from the hug, instead clutching onto his older cousin as if he would disappear if he were to let go.

“Aiden let it slip that Taylor, Logan, and I would be stopping here, and because of that Taylor and Logan were both contacted by Palmetto College to be guest speakers.”

“And you?”

“I turned it down. Don’t like public speaking.” Nicky hummed in agreement and felt his body relax as Tyler held him. Fuck. It's been years since I’ve last seen or been hugged by any of the SBGs.

“You gonna stay around and watch practice?” The younger man asked hopefully.

“If it’s cool with your team?” Tyler looked over at Coach Wymak who in turn nodded before gesturing for the others to give their opinion.

“I don’t see why not.” Matt was the first to speak up with Dan following along right after and the other girls nodding in agreement.

“We’ve had people sit in on practices before.”

“As long as he doesn’t distract us from practice.” Kevin added with Neil humming in agreement.

The twins were silent and it seemed as if Wymak expected that, because before Nicky could ask and pull away from Tyler to look at them, he clapped his hands and spoke up. “That settles it. Everyone out of the court! Hemmick finish changing!” He ordered.

“Yes Coach!”

The team split apart, Nicky giving Tyler one last squeeze before pulling away, excitement buzzing in his veins, and went to finish training. Wymak led Tyler to the home team’s bench and sat down with him watching the team.

Practice went smoothly, or as smoothly as it can with the Foxes. Aaron picked a lot of fights with Matt over the littlest shit and not even Neil could save his teammates from Andrew’s vicious throws.

Only Nicky seemed to be coming out on top of it all.

Not once during practice did he try to sooth over his cousins and their victims, too focused on the game in front of him and what came after. Dinner with his cousins! He was beyond excited for it. He loved his cousins, on both sides of his family, but he had different relationships with them. He is Andrew and Aaron’s guardian and older cousin who’s trying and failing at trying to give them a family. While his older cousins, Taylor and Tyler, are like older siblings to him. Taking him in when they were all 14 and treating him like a little brother. He felt loved by them. Nicky knew the Minyard twins loved him, it was just hard to believe it most days.

“Alright maggots!” Wymack called out, smacking on the plexiglass to stop the game before coming out onto the inner court. “Circle around. As you all know, we’ll be down a player for the next few weeks. At least.”

The man stressed causing Nicky to groan, he had meant for it to be internal but that didn’t happen. Tyler laughed at his groan. “Come on Nic, you know that the 2 weeks is the best case scenario.”

“Yeah yeah.” Nicky waved off with a glare, causing Tyler to grin even wider.

“And what’s the worst case scenario?” Neil spoke up, his hand holding onto Andrew’s.

When Nicky looked over at the couple he noticed the death grip his cousin had on the red headed man.

“Uhmmm.” Humming Nicky bit his bottom lip and looked at Tyler who made a face at him and shook his head. He was on his own. Fuck. “Worst case…worst case is probably a month or two or three.” He lied. He was a terrible liar and he knew that everyone on the team clocked it. “I will let you guys know if it runs over the two weeks.” He specifically said to Dan and Wymack, both who nodded in response.

There was a chime of a phone, making everyone look at Tyler as he dug out his phone from his jeans pocket before reading the message. “Tay and Logan are done at the campus and on their way over.” He said looking up from his phone to Nicky.

“Great!” He said with false enthusiasm and a smile. “Give me about 15. I’m going to shower and change, I don't wanna be stuck in a car smelling like a dirty ass for 5 hours.”

“You’ve smelled worse for longer.”

“I hate you.”

“Yeah love you too cous.” Tyler waved off and started to head out and wait for Nicky to be done.

“Alright maggots, you’re done for the day. Get out of here!” Wymack shoed the group off and into the locker rooms.

Nicky was humming to himself as he skipped off the court, forcing himself to ignore the growing anxiety of the unavoidable confrontation he would have with the other “Monsters”. If he was being fair he hated that name for them but he understood it. And he was a lot happier that his cousins and Kevin were able to start connecting to their teammates because of Neil. He appreciated and was eternally grateful for what the man did for his family, but he still dreaded letting any of them into his own anxieties and issues. Especially after Thanksgiving. He secretly wished for their deaths, not that he would ever admit that allowed to anyone. Maybe to Erik, but not to anyone else. It was too much for him to admit out loud. Nicky was saving himself the pain and conversation of explaining the Phantom World to his little cousins. He wanted to protect them and he was selfish. No denying that. Let the news explain to them what it is and what happened. He would answer all their questions once he got back and they had time for it to settle in and process. He was such a shitty person. A sinner.

“Nicky!” Hearing his name pulled him out of his thoughts and stopped him in his tracks.

“What’s up?” He looked over his shoulder to see Aaron glaring at him and Andrew staring. “What?” He laughed awkwardly and raised an eyebrow. “Something on my back?” He looked over his shoulder to his back, knowing there was nothing there.

“Nicky.” Aaron said again and walked the distance between them.

“Aaron.”

“What is going on?”

“What do you mean?”

“Stop! Stop paying dumb!” Aaron shoved at Nicky’s chest and grabbed the front of his jersey. Nicky looked down at him with a sad smile.

"Sorry Aaron.” He lifted a hand, placing it on his shoulder. “Tyler and Taylor are my older cousins on Maria’s side. Her and their dad were siblings, and I went to school with them and the others we are meeting up with in my freshman year.”

“Why haven’t we met them before?” Andrew’s monotonous voice asked.

Nicky looked up from Aaron to look at him. “I didn’t want to introduce you to any more outsiders than need be.”

“We decide what and who is need be.”

“Not at the time you didn’t.” He disagreed. “When I get back, I’ll let you both ask me any questions you want and will answer them honestly.”

“What else have you been keeping from us?” Aaron narrowed his eyes at him. “You’re a terrible liar, so what else have you been keeping from us?”

“I-“ He started before stopping, trying and failing several times to form the correct words. “My highschool years weren’t a good time. I don’t like talking about it, but I will when I get back.” He promised them. “Just promise not to kill me or anyone else.” Nicky looked between the two of them with a serious expression, one that he rarely wore. “Please.”

“No promises.” They responded as one. At least they’re getting along. Even if it’s against me. He smiled and nodded his head. He was half tempted to make a deal with them but at the same time, he wouldn’t and they would never accept.

“Fair enough. Now let’s go shower and change. I’ll introduce you to the twins and Logan before I leave if you want.” Both nodded and allowed Nicky to head for the showers. He didn’t see the look the two sent each other, if he did, he would never have left Palmetto with his older cousins, he would’ve stayed and weathered the storm with the twins he helped raise.

Nicky showered and changed fairly quickly, practically bouncing up and down as he waited for the twins to finish showering and changing, earning a few looks from the others as he impatiently waited. Allison seemed beyond amused by the situation and loudly proclaimed that she would be staying and watching the shit show. Which rude. It wasn’t going to be a shit show. That would come later. This was just a very early prelude to the shit show. Not that she knew that, but still Allison trust in Nicky to put on a show.

Once his cousins were done changing, Andrew insisted that they wait for Neil before heading out, the whole team left as one into the parking lot with Nicky leading the charge.

“Nicky!” Taylor’s bright voice greeted him as he exited the door from the stadium into the parking lot.

“Tay Tay!” He ran over and hugged her, picking her up and twirling her around. “How are you?”

“I’m going good.” She laughed and once she was set down pulled back and looked at him, cupping his face. “Oh Nicky, you’ve gotten so big.”

“You’ve always been the short one.”

“Shut up.” She slapped his chest playfully. “Now introduce us.” She looked over his shoulder with a nod, brightly grinning and waves at the Foxes gathered behind her little cousin.

“Foxes,” Nicky turned around to look back at his team, a bright genuine smile on his face. One that caused Matt and Dan to smile back just as brightly, happy for him, and a frown to deepen on the Monsters’ faces. “These are my cousins, Taylor, Tyler and Logan. Logan and Tyler are married, so we’re not blood cousins but that doesn’t matter in terms of family anyways. Taylor, Tyler, Logan, these are the Foxes. My younger cousins Aaron and Andrew, then Neil, Kevin, Dan, Matt, Renee, and Allison.”

“Nice to meet you guys.” Taylor smiles and walks closer and holds a hand out to Aaron who was closest to Nicky. Aaron looked at her hand then up at her, not taking her hand.

“Fair enough. Thank you guys for keeping Nicky alive the past few years, we got really worried for him a while ago. Erik definitely helped but you guys have been by his side the past few years. So thank you.”

“Taylor.” Nicky whined. “I’m a grown man.”

“I know but that doesn’t stop me from being grateful to them.” She looks at both Minyards. “If you ever have any car troubles, have Nicky give you my number and I’ll fix it right up. Least I could do.” All she got was silence in return but that didn’t seem to bother her.

Taylor walked over to Dan and held out her hand once more, this time the handshake was reciprocated. “You’re the Captain right?”

“Yup.”

“So badass.”

“Thank you.” Dan laughs at Taylor’s words and enthusiasm, that wasn’t a response she normally got.

Before she could speak more the familiar chime of Aiden’s ringtone came from Taylor’s phone. Where’s your head at? Nicky snorted a laugh before trying to cover it up with a cough.

“Hello?” Taylor answered. “Yeah we do…Soon…relax Aiden we’ll be there tomorrow morning at the latest…yeah love you too. Bye bye.” Sighing she tucked her phone away and looked back over to Tyler. “He’s excited and demanding we hurry up. Ash and Ben are out so he’s bored, expect some more calls.”

“That fucker.” He huffed and opened the driver’s side door to the jeep. “Let’s get going, I don’t want the cabin to be a burnt crisp by the time we get there.” Taylor and Logan piled in after him.

Nicky opened the back and threw his bag in before looking back at his younger cousins. “I’ll be back soon, you can always reach me over cell. I’ll explain everything, promise.” With that Nicky got into the jeep and left.

Three weeks. That’s how long Nicky was in Georgia. Three weeks with little to no contact from his fellow Monsters. Two weeks since he turned 25 and one week since he extended his stay. Once the story had broken, his phone was blowing up non stop. He practically ignored all of the texts, only responding to the twins’ texts of “we’re talking when you get back” and “you have a lot to explain for.” He had kept in constant contact with Erik the three weeks he spent in Georgia, even talked to the rest of the Klose family at one point. He couldn’t wait to get back to Germany and be with them in two years.

When Nicky was on his way back to Palmetto, he let Coach know, who in turn told him to head straight for the court after he learned the time frame Nicky was getting back at. He would bring his bags with him to the court, having Ben and Taylor drop him off before facing the dreaded conversation he would be having with the Foxes.

The whole ride he was anxiously chattering and tapping away at anything and everything with his fingers. Ben and Taylor dealt with his anxiety with practiced ease and did their best to take his mind off it. Time passed both painfully slow and yet horribly fast. He didn’t want to get out of the jeep when they pulled up, Nicky having to show the new security guard his ID for them to be let into the parking lot, he wondered what that was about but a part of him understood it was because and for him.

“Maybe this was a mistake.” He said not opening the door. “Maybe I should just disappear off the face of the Earth never to be seen again.”

“What about Erik?” Ben signed, after snapping to gain his attention before signing.

“He’d obviously come with me.” He says and signs. “Or I’d shelter somewhere nearby where no one wants to go, like the Black Forest.”

“Stupid idea. That place is a breeding ground for Phantoms.”

“Ben’s right, even with our connection to it, it’s not safe. You’ll be all on your own there and could easily be overwhelmed in dealing with them.”

“Yeah but-“

“But nothing. Call me when you get to your dorm room okay?” She patted his cheek and leaned over to open his door. “Now get out and face the music. Call mom and tell her you made it here, if you don’t she’ll worry.”

“Alright alright, love you too. Drive safe and let me know when you make it home.” He said before finally hopping out of the car with his bags and slammed the door behind him.
Before he could second guess even more, Ben sped off. “Fucking fuck. Ohhhh I don’t wanna do this.” He groaned as he walked towards the player entrance, put that week’s code into the door and forced himself to put one foot in front of the other.

Distracting himself further, he pulled out his phone and called his Aunt. “Hi Auntie,” he said in Spanish when she picked up her phone.

No one was in the foyer when he arrived so he sat down in one of the chairs and leaned back. “Yeah I’m doing okay. How are you?...That’s good. No, no, yes obviously. Clearly she had the right thing going for her… that’s what I’m saying!” He chatted on the phone with his aunt for nearly an hour before saying goodbye. Nicky felt exhausted, his aunt had talked away his anxieties and without tension holding his body up and keeping him going, Nicky felt his eyes start to become heavier as sleep started to overtake him.

Sleeping like this wouldn’t be good for his neck or back but who cares? Certainly not him. A quick nap wouldn’t hurt. Darkness filled his vision and his breathing slowed as sleep overcame him.

If he dreamed, Nicky didn’t remember it, he was startled awake by something cold and wet hitting his face and pouring down his shirt. “Fuck!” He shot up and swatted at whomever was closest, which so happened to be Kevin. “Didn’t anyone ever teach you not to wake a sleeping man.” He grumbled in Spanish, whipping the sleep and water out of his eyes.

Kevin was standing in front of him with his signature scowl on his face, behind him was Matt, Dan, Allison, and Wymack, the latter of which looked too exhausted and done with his team’s shit to still be here. “Up and at ‘em Hemmick!” He barked and headed towards his office. “You and Kevin meet me in my office now!”

He let out a string of curses in Spanish, an old habit he picked up after spending nearly a month with the SBGs. “Coming!” Nicky said cheerfully in English and got up and stretched.

The upperclassmen all looked at Nicky as if seeing him in a new light as he walked by, which he supposed they were. Some of his greatest secrets were released to the world, and he was one of the few people in the world that could control and summon the Phantom Realm. But was this really one of the most startling things they’ve experienced the past two years? The whole Kevin and Neil debacle with the Ravens the past two years was something out of a book, and sure Phantoms were world changing and maybe Nicky didn’t usually talk to himself or let out a clear string of curses, even if in Spanish curses were still curses and this team knew what a curse was, even if in a language they didn’t speak. He just wanted them to treat him like the inconvenience they did before, but Nicky knew deep down that wouldn’t happen, no matter how much he didn’t want to admit it.

Stepping into Wymack’s office, Nicky felt like a drowned and cornered rat, which he probably was given how all four other members of the Monsters were in the room as well as Abby and Bee. Nicky didn’t really care to much for Bee, she helped the twins and he was immensely grateful and indebted to her forever for that, but fuckkkkk he didn’t want to talk to her, especially not about Phantoms or any of his highschool career which would inevitably come up in this conversation.

Shutting the door behind him, he sighed, and leaned back against the door, looking over everyone in the room before settling on Wymack. “Sup Coach, how have the past few weeks been? Kevin and Neil drive you up a wall yet?” He tried to joke, to put off the inevitable, he didn’t want to talk about any of it but he promised he would and he wouldn’t break this promise. Hell, he even would summon a bit of the realm to them and show them if they asked, Logan had suggested it and after some debate they all agreed.

Thankfully Wymack played along. “A lot quieter since you’ve away but the little fuckers don’t have a solid handler to keep them in check and all collectively hate on.”

Placing a hand on his chest dramatically and whipping away a fake tear with the other. “For shame Coach, that collective hatred could have been placed on Neil’s failing English grade. Can’t pass, can’t play. Should’ve lit a fire under them and see what happens.”

Wymack snorted and rolled his eyes. “Yeah and if I did that, the minimum consequence is that his grade gets raised and at the other end of the spectrum, there’s at least two dead bodies to hide. I ain’t taking those chances with these fucks.”

“Smart man.” He laughed. While he was still tense, a lot of the tension had bleed away as he talked with Wymack. The familiarity and unchanging way the man treated him gave Nicky comfort. It grounded him and he hoped it would be enough to get him through.

“Mmm.” He hummed and pointed to the chair across from the desk, Andrew and Aaron were sitting in the other two chairs, Neil leaned against Andrew’s leg as he sat on the floor and Kevin sat on the shelf behind Wymack’s desk. While Abby was sitting on the couch, looking out of place. All eyes had been on him since he entered, some more intense than others. “Sit, we have much to discuss.”

Nicky sat and let out a tired laugh-sigh mix, he felt decades older than he was. “I know, I know. Where do you want to start?”

Wymack held up his hand before any of them could speak. “Let’s start with how your family handled the news. I assume they reached out to you?”

Nicky nodded, “I don’t know about Aaron and Andrew’s reactions, but my parents apparently caused a fuss. My Aunt already knew since I was living with her and my cousins at the time, all three of us were together and she knew the day Tyler died. We told the adults then and Erik and his family called and checked in. Erik already knew and his parents had seen me do some odd stuff here and there, so it wasn’t too difficult to wrap their heads around. And pretty much the rest of the ‘extended’” he made air quotes around “extended”, “already knew and were just checking in. Lily didn’t know much about it back then but she learned a lot more when the news broke,” Nicky laughed bitterly and looked down at his feet, hand rubbing the back of his neck.

The water was starting to dry and he felt more and more uncomfortable in his clothing. “Poor kid, we wanted to keep as much of it as we could away from her, but well, when your brother and his friends get really hurt and because of them a bunch of psychos kidnap you-“ Nicky bit the inside on his bottom lip hard. “I-I need to stop talking.”

He took a deep breath and did some tapping to center himself, nearly ten minutes later of him coming down from his panic, Nicky spoke up again. “Next question?”

“Who’s Lily?”

Not expecting it but appreciating the soft ball, Nicky smiled softly and looked at Wymack. “She’s Ben’s little sister. Sweet kid, loves bunnies.”

“She sounds sweet. How’d you all meet?”

“Same history class our freshman year.”

“And this all happened on a field trip to Savanna?” It wasn’t really a question but Wymack seemed to be in a good mood and Nicky wasn’t going to let that go to waste.

“Unfortunately.” He leaned back and looked up at the ceiling. “We got offered a free tour of a “haunted” house and us being 14 we took it. Turns out it was a trap and that they had been luring in people and sending them into the phantom realm for years. We were the only ones to walk out of there, mostly because Ash and Aiden are a bit murderous but,” he shrugged and looked back at Wymack. “Can’t go back and change it now.”

“Ash is the leader of your group, right?”

“Yeah, she’s a fucking badass. Has a retractable knife boot, which no!” He whipped his head and pointed at Andrew then Aaron and finally Neil. “None of you are allowed to get one and I will know if you do.”

Aaron scoffed, Neil looked slightly ashamed and up towards Andrew, the little red head was so thinking about it. And Andrew looked pissed, Nicky hated that look being pointed at him.

“Her parents taught us self defense, at first-“

“Why at first?” Andrew asked, everyone’s eyes flick over to him before back at Nicky.

“Logan was being bullied at school, so we used that as a cover for learning how to fight back. We wanted to survive the night ya know? Seven hours of hell…” Nicky closed his eyes and clenched his fists before taking a deep breath and releasing it. His anxiety was high and reliving those memories again, away from the people he went through with, logically knowing they were safe, but illogically wanting to check on them and make sure they were okay. “Anyways, we learned self defense and after escaping the facility the Banners trained us in fighting. We were not going to get kidnapped again. Didn’t matter if the fuckers were dead or not, we didn’t know how deep the connections went and we didn’t want to know. Our guardians did, but… I- no more on that.” Nicky weakly smiled, forcing himself to smile more.

“Hemmick?” Wymack.

“Nicky?” Kevin, Neil, and Abby.

“I don’t like to think about my parents.” He said after a minute of silence. He heard Aaron let out a low growl and Neil smack Andrew’s caf.

“What happened after the facility?” Abby asked softly, after a few tense minutes of silence, only broken by occasional gruff or growl from one of the Monsters.

“Stayed in Georgia till Spring break before heading back in with my parents. After that…”

Abby prompted him again, getting up and kneeling in front of him, placing her hands on his knees. “After that…”

“I thought they cared and I could be open with them but I was wrong. I came out to them and I was sent away.”

“How long?” She rubbed her fingers on his knees.

“A year, and after that I barely made it through junior year. Was lucky a teacher noticed and I was able to go to Germany.” He smiled softly. “Then I met Erik and he saved my life, and was able to get in contact with the SBG members. Hadn’t spoken to them for two years at that point, Auntie knew what happened and told the twins who told the rest. Aiden nearly burned down my parents house,” he snorted. “But Ash and Ben talked him down. Taylor made sure to lock him in and Logan had a water gun at the ready.”

“A water gun?” Wymack asked, trying to be unamused but couldn’t hold back the laugh.

“Yeahhhh, Aiden’s kinda like an orange cat, all hyper and chaotic, hisses when squirted with water or talking to Tyler. And it’s not like Logan would have shot him, weren’t in the Phantom Realm.”
“And what does the Phantom Realm have to do with not being shot?” Wymack furrowed his eyebrows and so did Kevin, like father like son.

“Injuries have different consequences and effects there. Like, take Tyler for example, he felt out of a moving car and fell onto a tree. Stabbed straight through him. While he didn’t necessarily die, any normal person would’ve died, but you stop being normal after a certain point in the realm. Instead, once our time was up and we were back in the regular world, his body went into shock and was convulsing. He was in a coma for about a day before Taylor lost her shit and summoned a piece of the realm to us. That woke him up. But in the Phantom Realm, his body was still in the tree and once we got him off it, he was bleeding out for nearly 2 weeks. Aiden’s head was fucked up for about a week too. Then-…yeah. Injures just work differently for us there. But if we get injured here, we’re still injured there, but we heal faster than normal people.”

He was rambling. He was rambling so hard. The more he talked the more he revealed about himself, which was the point. It made sure that in some way he had control over the situation and that his rambling usually pissed off or annoyed the Monsters to the point of them getting up and walking away as they usually did. But with the look the twins were giving him, their anger was only growing and he was going to end up on the wrong side of a knife if he didn’t stop soon but Nicky knew himself. He wasn’t going to stop.

Neil was the next person to talk. “You also died there.”

That little fucker.

Nicky felt his eye twitch, whether it was internal or not he didn’t know. Aaron stood up and strode over to Nicky, towering over him and forcing Abby to move out of the way and once she was, he smacked his hands on the arms of Nicky’s chair. “What?”

“It happened a long time ago.” He replied unable to meet his eyes. Which only seemed to piss him off more.

Aaron grabbed his face and forced Nicky to look at him. “How?” He growled, eyes dark and narrowed.

Fuck. I caused that. He hated the pain and fear he saw in his little cousin’s eyes. Nicky wanted to take that pain away and protect him from anything that could hurt him. But he couldn’t. They never let him and never will let him. “I’m sorry Aaron.” He breathed out, voice shaking. “I’m so sorry.”

“How?” The grip tightened.

“One of the centipedes tore me apart by my limps.” He spoke barely above a faint whisper.

He heard Kevin fall off the shelf, Bee and Abby gasp in shock, and Neil grunt as he assumed Andrew pushed him out of the way to get up, because not even a second later Aaron was pushed aside and Andrew was standing before him and gripping his chin tighter than Aaron had. He wanted to curse in pain but knew Andrew would only tighten his grip if he complained.
“Explain.”

One word. One word was all it took for Andrew to get what he wanted from just about anyone. And Nicky was nothing if not average. He caved.

“We call them centipedes because they have like dozens of legs but they’re so fucking freaky and part of the the Phantom Realm so they’re fucking massive. Bigger than a semi. One was also technically behind killing Aiden too. Fucker hit the building and bam! Head gets hit with concrete ceiling tiles. My death was later when we were trying to break out of the facility they took us too. I ended up finding an exit and when I opened the door and was barely a step out, one grabbed me and tore me to shreds. I woke up in a lot of pain and with a lot of screaming. They thought I became one of the “infected”” Nicky did air quotes for “infected”, those people weren’t infected, they were victims.

“Got transferred from solitude to some med room, still o solitude but with a fuck ton of monitors and people coming in and out. That night we planned the escape, Aiden and Tyler were a lot more functioning then they were a few days earlier and I was bleeding out of my shoulders and joints. Even my neck bleeding a bit, we think the fucker bit a chunk out of my neck or even my whole head off.” He was grinning again, remembering the times where Aiden, Tyler, and he made dead jokes all the time. All three finding joy in the shared trauma and coping within one another’s pain was a relief. A sense of community and family, one where even in their traumatized group that they also had a shared understanding of death that the others didn’t.

“Stop smiling.” The slap Andrew gave him broke him out of his thoughts.

“Sorry just thinking about the others.”

Andrew’s mouth opened to speak but it was Neil’s voice that came out. Or well Neil is the one that spoke. It would be some freaky thing if they could start speaking out of each other’s mouths. “You love them, don’t you?”

“I do.” He agreed. “They’re a part of my family, and I theirs.”

“You,” Andrew’s voice drew his attention back to the man in front of him. “Nicholas Hemmick, you belong to me. You are mine.” He growled, his nails digging into Nicky’s face. He could feel the blood starting to well underneath his fingers and drip onto his shirt. “My cousin, my family, mine to protect. Mine!”

Nicky lifted a hand and touched Andrew’s hand that was gripping his face, his light touch seemed to piss him off even more and the fingers dug impossibly deeper. “Andrew, I am yours. Your older cousin, your legal guardian,” eyes flicked quickly to Aaron and back again. “Your family. Nothing will ever change that. I’m sorry I ever made you feel like it did.”
Andrew’s next words were in German. “You are not allowed to leave my sight ever again.”

“Andrew-” Nicky started but was cut off by Andrew shaking his head, more blood on his shirt.

“No. You’re not allowed.”

“You know I will be moving back to Germany-”

Slap.

“Andrew!” Abby and Wymack yelped in horror.

“Now Andrew-” Bee’s voice broke through the growing chaos of the room, but the ringing in his ears was too much. His eyes solely focused on Andrew.

“Shut it!” Aaron and Neil barked out at the same time.

Kevin was the next to speak up. “Either you three” Nicky is assuming those above 40, “leave or stop talking.”

There was more talking but Nicky couldn’t hear it anymore, his world became Andrew’s face and the ringing which was turning into a buzz, the buzz all too familiar. He wanted to hear more of it, the comforting buzz. The buzz and peace that it brought is what he wanted, what he needed. There! The blackness. Those shadows. Those safe and familiar and oh so comforting shadows. How he wanted to go into them.

Slap. Slap.

He blinked and tilted his head to look at Andrew once again, when did he stop? He was just looking at him wasn’t he?

“What?” He furrowed his brows and looked at Andrew in confusion. “What happened?”

“You zoned out.” Neil responded, he was right next to Andrew and looking at Nicky in worry. Why was he worried?

Kevin’s voice was next and he was standing right beside him now, Aaron on Nicky’s other side. “You started to summon something.” When Nicky looked at him, he elaborated more. “The shadows were growing and moving.”

“Oh.” He said numbly. “Sorry.”

“Sorry?” Aaron sounded like he wanted to be mad but his face just showed confusion and concern. Fuck I really need to stop conerning him. Them. All of them really.

“I-yeah. Didn’t mean to zone out. Just a lot of buzzing ya know?” Nicky shrugged, surprised that he was just now noticing that Andrew was no longer holding his face and that there was no blood running down them, it was clotted or cleaned off. “Happens when my anxiety is high and heavily overwhelmed and forcibly repressing it deep down. Hasn’t happened in years, last it did it ended up with Erik finding out this whole mess. Poor 18 year old me and bless that man and his beautiful, beautiful heart and kind soul and his ass. God his ass.”

“Okay Nicky I think we get the picture.” Neil said.

“I will not apologize for appreciating an amazing piece of God’s art.” He laughed and felt himself relaxing a bit and leaned back into the chair he was sitting in. “I really love that man. He means the world to me and just the thought of not being able to go back and be with him again? That’s horrifying. He’s my world.”

“I get that.” Neil smiled and looked at Andrew before looking back at Nicky. “I really do, but Andrew and Aaron really need you right now. Here with them and with us. We can arrange for Erik to come and stay in the states- wait. Before you speak, Ichirou Moriyama wants to speak with you. He reached out while you were…away, and will offer you and the Kloses his protection and safe passage for Erik to join you here.”

“In return for what?” Nicky snapped at him, snapping his head to look from the ceiling to Neil’s face and he was pissed. “I’m not working or doing anything for anyone. Erik has a life, I have a life, the rest of the SBGs have lives and none of us or our families are going to work for any of the mobs, or mafias, or governments. Well-we do the occasional governmental stuff and Ash does some weird fucking shit with them that I don’t really understand and Logan’s family…yeeshhh they are dangerous people. Scary old people with an even scarier grandson.” He shivered and a smile returned to his face once again.

“Nicky please, just hear him out.” Neil tried once more before Kevin placed a hand on his shoulder, causing Neil to look at him and sigh. “Fine. Let’s go wait outside.” With that he and Kevin left the room, leaving the cousins to themselves.

No one spoke for several minutes, Nicky internally humming Party Rock in his head and tapping his toe softly. He picked up the habit of hiding his ADHD during his Junior year but lost it in Germany when he was finally able to be his full self. And when he took in the twins, he quickly learned to mask his ADHD once again. He didn’t want to scare them off or annoy them but he ended up annoying them anyway. Talking too much, never knowing what to say, when to say it, when to stop pushing or when to push. He was a mess and a half. His toe tapping internal rock concert was interrupted by Aaron pinching his face.

“Aaronnnn.” He whined and looked at his cousin with a pout. “My cheeks can only handle so much damage.”

“Nicky.” He said, eyes narrowing. “Stop avoiding us. This. Stop avoiding this.”

“I-I know. I’m sorry. I’m sorry that I’m not sorry for not telling you.” He held up his hand, stopping them from saying something, usually that didn’t work but for some reason they were willing to hear him out now. “I wanted to protect you both from my past issues. And I failed spectacularly at that, I know but I can’t be sorry for keeping this from you.”

“I understand that, I do.” Andrew said, pulling the chair he was previously sitting in closer, so that when he sat down in it his and Nicky’s knees were touching. He patted Nicky’s legs in a condescending way and smiled that manic fake smile that Nicky hated with a passion. “But right now Nicky, right now you are not going anywhere. You are not leaving my sight until I give the say so, and even then Aaron also is in charge of watching you. You are not to leave our sights, go somewhere we don’t know about or don’t approve of, do something we don’t approve of, you will be doing night training with us now too, as is Aaron.”

“Andrew I’m not someone you can keep on a leash.”

“Wanna find out?”

With an exasperated sigh Nicky patted Andrew’s hand then Aaron’s. “You both are too much. I’ll go along with this but I do have classes, appointments, places and people I need to see and be at. I love you both and I’m sorry you feel you have to resort to this to keep me, but you don’t have to. You both are my family. Always will be. I won’t ever be leaving you, I may be out of sight or city or country, but that doesn’t matter. I will always come when you call, I hope that you both know that.”

“And now we don’t need to call you, you’ll be right there with us.” The look on Andrew’s face left no room for discussion and when he looked over at Aaron for help, there was none to be found. Nicky had lived with his cousins for nearly 5 years at this point, always on eggshells and always within range in case something happened, but at least then he was able to have some privacy. He had a feeling that he would be unable to even go to the bathroom without someone there, let alone be able to have a hook up.

He was so going to bitch to Erik later about this. Maybe he would start going into the Phantom Realm every night again to get some peace and quiet. He’d have to tell the others about his plans in case something butterfly affected them. Thankfully Palmetto wasn’t an area where Phantoms gathered in mass like the Black Forest, in which he wanted to disappear into, or the Appalachian Mountains. Areas like those gathered highly powerful and dangerous Phantoms and they agreed to never go to places like that alone, there had to be at least three of them together in one of those places. So going into the realm here by himself wouldn't be an issue. And since coming into their powers and command over the realm, they no longer had to fight for their lives while there.

Maybe he could get through this.

Probably not in one piece but he could. With a deep breath, he slapped the arms of the chair and stood up, pushing it back a ways so he had some space from Andrew. “I got some things to unpack and get a bag ready for night practice if I got to go.”

“Why do you need a bag?” Aaron asked, quick to follow Nicky out the door. Andrew taking his time but no more than two steps behind them.

“Because when midnight hits I go to the Phantom Realm for seven hours.” He wasn’t going to tell them that it was optional for him to go in and out of the realm, this was the one thing he would keep from them. Because seven blessed hours of alone time and peace from the shit storm of over protectiveness and possessiveness of the Monsters was going to be the thing that kept him sane.

“And time with this, you guys won’t experience the seven hours, it will only be seven minutes this world time. Usually we’re lying down or sitting when it happens so when we wake up we're in the same place.”

“What do you mean by wake up?” Aaron again, ever the talker out of the twins.

They had just reached the foyer where Neil and Kevin were talking to Dan and Matt, his eyes looking over the couches and room before he started to physically look around and under the coaches and chairs. “Anyone see my bags?”

“Out in the car.” The two exy junkies said, not bothering to look over at him.

“Okay cool.” He turned to look back at Aaron, hoping to sit on the back of couch. “By ‘waking up’ it’s just an easy way to say coming back into this world from the Phantom one. We didn’t really know what to call stuff like that, so we just called it what felt right or what was easiest. Like the term ‘Phantom’ came from Ash. She was hyperacusis and could hear them, she thought they were just ‘phantom noises’ from her over sensitive hearing but she was actually hearing the Phantoms. She still hears the smallest sounds and the weirdest shit. But yeah! We were 14 and we just needed easy ways to explain and understand what was happening to us.”

At some point everyone had started to listen to him but he didn’t care, he knew they would be curious and explaining how they came up with names and terms was easy. And he thought it could also answer some questions they wanted to ask or explain something they didn’t understand. It was all quite simple really, they were 14 and scared shitless. Just think about what you would do or say in that time of your life and bam! Easy answers.

At least to him it was an easy answer.

“Are we ready to go? Haven’t eaten since noon and I’m starting to get hungry.” He grinned and looked over the other Monsters, seeing some shrugs and nods of agreement. “Right, let's get going! Or are we staying here until night practice?” He teases Kevin and Neil, getting off the couch and walking towards the exit. “Oh!” Stopping, he turned around and looked at Dan and Matt with a soft smile. “Have a goodnight you guys, sorry for leaving you alone with them. But thank you for dealing with them and keeping the team alive!”

They looked a bit shocked but nodded and Matt smiled back at him brightly while Dan waved her hand. “You owe us one Hemmick.”

Winking at them he gave his best flirtatious smile. “Anything for you two.” And he was surprised he meant it. They did handle the Monsters alone for three weeks and Erik and he were quite open in their sexual relations, being separated by an ocean really leads to some new sexual discoviers for them- but! That’s besides the point. Focus Nicky.

Aaron slapped the back of his head and shoved him forwards. “Stop talking. And stop thinking about sex.”

“What can I say, Dan and Matt are a sexy couple. I’d give anything for them to-AH! Fuck Aaron!” He let out a string of curses in Spanish as he stumbled into the door and out of the building. Aaron’s pushes were getting a lot stronger.

“Seriously Nicky?” Neil’s disapproving voice came from behind before hands were helping to steady him and gently pushed him in the direction of the car. “What about Erik?”

“Our sex is open to others as long as we communicate who, where, when, and how it was after.” Nicky grinned and opened the back passenger door and climbed in. He figured he would be sandwiched between the twins but it was really strange to actually be sitting in between them and having Andrew’s arm draped around his shoulders. To anyone else the touch would be casual but to Nicky he knew it was a big thing for Andrew to reach out and touch him first, and he also noticed the easy way it would be to hold him down in case he moved in a way Andrew didn’t like.

“Uh huh.” Kevin muttered shutting the passenger door and looking back at Nicky.

“Serious! If you guys want to ask him, you can! I ain’t no cheater. Erik is my one and only.”

“You aren’t having sex anytime soon Nicky.” Andrew said, his gaze looking out the window. “You’re staying close to us at all times, no wandering. I’ll chain you down and leash you if I must.”

“No need Andrew. I’ll let you know or ask for some privacy when I need some hook up time.”

“No hookups.”

“Dammit Andrew.” He pouted. “I’m insufferable when I’m pent up.”

“You’re already insufferable.”

“Oh hush up Aaron.”

“Nicky, you’re not having any alone time ever again.” Andrew said, pulling his gaze from the window to look Nicky in the eyes. “You kept this from us, who knows what else you could be keeping. So as punishment for keeping secrets from us, you're not allowed out.”

Oh fuck his life. Fuck it all.