Archive of Our Own

Hawks watched the figure appear from the dark. His heart began trying to break through his ribs in its fear. However, he refused to let it win. He was a Jedi, one of the few left, and he wouldn't die today.

Dabi was a mere few meters away, his black robe billowing in the wind. Hawks longed to run to the other man, to bury himself in the Sith, to be held in his embrace. 

An hour ago, he would have with no hesitation. Now, he promised to never fall back into the Sith.

Dabi frowned, tipping his head to the side. He took a step forward and Hawks backed up until he hit a tree. He froze in fear as the older man continued walking towards him.

'What's wrong, pretty bird?' Dabi asked and it was the nickname that sent Hawks over the edge. The way he could simply say that, in a gentle tone, as if he hadn't...as if..

'You murdered all of the Jedi!' He snapped, hand gripping his lightsaber. 

'Not all of them.' Dabi chuckled. 'I certainly couldn't do it alone, plus you're still alive. I gave the clones strict orders not to hurt you, just bring you in.' He frowned. 'Shiagaraki informed me they were elite soldiers; I must say, I'm disappointed.'

'Is that supposed to make me feel better?' Hawks spat. 'my friends are dead but I'm not because you want me alive? Forget it, Touya, I'm not going anywhere near you ever again.' His fingers tightened on the hilt. Dabi's eyes flitted down to the movement and he sighed.

'Is all this drama really worth it?' Dabi rolled his eyes and Hawks felt a flare of anger that he instantly clamped down on, lest the Sith recognise it through their bond. 

'From the guy who exposed his father on live galactic television, I find it hard to believe you don't find all this amusing.' Hawks replied, a smile tearing through his lips. 'You don't care how long things take, so long as you get the result you want.' Dabi laughed, low and menacing. There was a dangerous look in his cerulean eyes.

'Very true. You so know so well, Keigo.' He smiled. Hawks snapped his saber to life, rage threatening to consume him.

'Do not call me that.' He snarled as Dabi ignited his blood-red saber. 'You don't get to call me that anymore, Touya. Not after what you did.'

Dabi's eyes narrowed and Hawks noticed the shift from blue to red. He gripped his green lightsaber tighter, aware of Dabi's unexpected attacks. Sure enough, Dabi moved so quickly, Hawks was nearly cut in half. He dodged, heart now pounding as if it were trying to beat a lifetime's worth. Dabi attacked again, almost lazily and Hawks brought his green lightsaber up just in time to parry the blow. Despite being a Jedi, Hawks was used to being on the offence in battle, using his speed to his advantage. Dabi knew this, the bastard, and was forcing him onto the defence to throw him off. Hawks glared at him as their lightsabers clashed. Dabi had always been a formidable opponent, even as a Jedi, and they both knew that the possibility of Hawks winning this battle was slim. He still fought with everything he had; Dabi wasn't the only one who'd grown stronger in ten years. 

'This is almost like old times, isn't it?' Dabi laughed, attacking to Hawks' right. Hawks gritted his teeth. 'Aw, come on. Not even a little nod?' Hawks slashed upwards viciously and knocked Dabi slightly off balance. He followed it up quickly with a succession of attacking thrusts. An utterly insane smile lit up Dabi's features better than the lightsabers or the moon ever could. 'Yes!' He whispered. 'That's it Keigo! Use your anger! There is no Jedi Council to hold you back anymore! Tell me you still remember what I told you!'

'I remember.' Hawks snarled breathlessly. 'Don't bring it up. We were different back then.'

'Were we really?' Dabi asked. As if to emphasis that statement, he twisted the lightsabers up, illuminating his face. He looked scarily like Touya.

'I was beginning to think you weren't gonna show up.' Touya teased, swinging his blue lightsaber around carelessly. Keigo grinned, taking his own green one from his belt.

'I'll always show up, Tou. My favourite part of the week.' He ignited his lightsaber, moving into the combat postion. Touya laughed.

'Wow, getting straight into it. Not that I'm disappointed.' The older boy began attacking swiftly and Keigo matched his blows with equal speed, a smile on both of their faces.

Hawks glared at Dabi, a mere parody of his long-dead best friend. However much he wanted to pretend, Touya was gone, consumed by Dabi. 

Sometimes, Hawks used to wonder if he had fallen in love with Dabi, or Touya.

Dabi beamed as they clashed, seemingly ecstatic with Hawks. 

Touya beamed at him as Keigo tried again.

'That's it!' He laughed. 'You got it!' Keigo paused.

'Really?' He asked, hopeful.

'Yeah! And no wonder! You've been working so hard at it; you're doing amazing. You keep this up and soon, you'll be the second greatest Jedi ever!' Touya hugged him and Keigo flushed with pride.

'Second greatest?'

'Well, obviously, I'm gonna be the greatest.' Touya replied. Keigo wriggled out of his embrace and smacked him. Touya laughed and jumped on him, starting a wrestling match.

Hawks finally managed to get the upper hand, bringing himself onto the offensive. Dabi grinned, a Cheshire Cat grin that promised nothing but trouble. Hawks knew he was trouble, knew it from the minute he walked in the door and he'd still allowed himself to get swept away.

Unexpectedly, Dabi lashed out at the right of him. He caught on nothing but air. He repeated the action on Hawks' left.

Hawks opened his mouth to make a remark about Dabi's odd behaviour, then realised his intentions.

He's trying to find my location. The Dyad only allows us to see each other, so he can't see where I am. So he's taking extreme measures.

And his next swing was heading for a tree. Hawks blocked it and Dabi's face lit up.

'So, there's something there.' He murmured and began attacking in that direction. Panicked, Hawks' defences began getting irrational in his desperation not to be found.

'Can you see where I am?' Hawks asked.

'No,' Dabi replied, 'only you.' He stepped closer so that now they were only arms length apart. 'What about me?'

'I can't see your surroundings either.' Hawks replied. 'Do you want to know where I am?'

'Yes.'

Dabi struck down on Hawks' green lightsaber and it went spinning out of his hand. Hawks gasped and Dabi kicked his legs out from underneath him. 

Dabi pointed the red lightsaber at his throat.

'Now, will you give up?' Dabi huffed. Hawks shook his head. 'Just tell me where you are; it'll make both our lives way easier.'

'Get fucked Dabi.' Hawks hissed. Dabi scowled and kicked him in the chest, leaving the blond Jedi gasping for air. Dabi raised his saber and sliced into a tree. Pieces of charred bark flew out and Dabi grabbed one.

'I'll find you, Keigo.' Dabi promised, before lifting his saber and stabbed Hawks. Not deeply but it still drove out a scream that Dabi covered with his hand. 'don't worry, this won't kill you. i want you alive.' Hawks choked, his fingers dyed with his own blood.

'What?' He gasped.

'Just some insurance to make sure you don't try to run away.' Dabi smiled. 'I love you, Keigo.'

The Force Dyad broke, leaving Hawks alone in the dark forest.

Hawks took a deep breath. Dabi hadn't stabbed right through him at least. he ripped off a strip from his robe and used it as a makeshift bandage.

He grabbed onto a tree and hauled himself up onto shaky legs. Covering his mouth to muffle his pained moans, Hawks forced himself to start moving. He reached the edge of the forest soon and wished he hadn't. The building he had been staying in was aflame, like a beacon in the night sky, and troopers had surrounded it. His golden eyes went wide and his pulse shot up. Bile rose in his rose as he noticed a familiar figure standing at the front.

Dabi.

How the hell did they get here so fast?

'You're here quick! How'd you do it?' Touya asked, gasping slightly in pain. Keigo frowned, dropping to his knees.

'You're hurt, Tou. I'll always come if you need my help.' The younger boy reassured, pulling out some bandages. 'Now hold still.'

Hawks watched in horror as the landowner and his family was brought forwards. Dabi said something and blaster shots rang out. They slumped over, dead.

'No!' Hawks screamed stupidly. Immediately, Dabi heard him. His head snapped up and, for a moment, their eyes met. Then Hawks turned and ran back into the forest, adrenaline spiking through his body. He could feel Dabi's intentions through their bond. 

Bring him to me. Alive.

'There's a bounty on your head, son.' The hunter told him. Hawks froze. 'Unfortunately, it is alive and unharmed, so you should count yourself lucky.' A gun smacked into his head and Hawks rolled over. The flash grenade had taken his sight, but nothing could take away his connection to the Force. He stood up, reaching out with the Force and called his lightsaber to him. Igniting it, he could feel the bounty hunter's fear.

'I'm not going anywhere with you.' He told the hunter. 'And I don't need my eyes to fight you.'

'No, but I reckon you might be in a spot of trouble if I do this!' The bounty cackled, sending several blasts at him. Hawks reflected every one. He smiled, feeling the bounty hunter's confusion.

'Like I said, I'm not going anywhere with you.'

Hawks ran faster than he had ever run in his life. it was surprising, how he could get so far in s much pain but he had always had a high tolerance. Eventually, however, he tripped and lacked the strength to get up. He suspected Dabi might have something to do with that. He couldn't move, even though every nerve in his body was screaming at him to get up.

Footsteps approached and hands roughly pulled him up. Hawks winced as cold metal dug into his wrists, hissing pain. Troopers dragged him through the woods, not caring if he tripped or stumbled.

When they reached the edge of the woods, Dabi's Force Presence shone bright, horribly reassuring. Hawks despised himself.

He was shoved unceremoniously down to his knees in front of the Sith. Dabi looked at him and then flicked his wrist; Hawks flinched, the blinked as the troopers surrounding them to the floor, dead.

Dabi crouched down, cupping his face in his hands.

'i said alive and unharmed.' Dabi hissed. 'What the fuck have they done?' Dabi undid his cuffs and Hawks slapped him as hard as he could, rage coursing through his body. Dabi winced.

'I may have deserved that.' He admitted in an infuriatingly smug voice.

'May have?' Hawks spat. 'You participated in a mass genocide!' Dabi laughed and hugged him tight. He kissed Hawks' neck and nuzzled into blond hair.

'Feisty.' He giggled. 'That'll help you.' Hawks' blood ran cold.

'If you're implying what I think-'

'Darling, you know what I'm implying.'

'I won't join you!' Hawks snarled. Dabi tightened his grip and Hawks could sense the other's barely contained rage through the Force. 'You can't make me!' 

'Sure I can.' Dabi murmured. 'I can make you do anything. I just have to know which strings to pulls.' He sighed softly.

'S-shut up!' Hawks demanded. 'Get off me, get off me, get - don't touch me!' Dabi ignored him, rocking their bodies together. 

'Shh, shh, my little dove. You're ok now. It'll be ok.' Dabi whispered as Hawks struggled. 

'N-no.' Hawks shook his head desperately. 'No, Touya, please.' Dabi paused for a moment, then chuckled.

'You're so cute when you're scared, Kei.'

'Shut up!' Hawks growled. 'I don't want anything to do with you!' Dabi sighed and Hawks registered a flicker of hurt through their bond before smugness replaced it.

'Your Force Presence tells a different story, sweetheart.' Dabi teased, nosing into the crook of Hawks' neck. 'You do still want me, dove. And I still want you.' Hawks shook his head, tears leaking from his gold eyes.

But he didn't fight when Dabi lifted him up, bridal style of all things, and carried him aboard the ship, cradling him as if he was a precious jewel. He didn't fight when Dabi laid him on the bunk and kissed him softly. He kissed back, hating himself for it. He didn't fight when Dabi wrapped a blanket around him. He didn't fight, or try to sleep, or do anything.

Hawks clung to Dabi as he was led to the medbay. He had promised himself he wouldn't be moved by Dabi's persuasions. Instead, he fell straight into a trap of his own making. 

Because fuck it, he was in love.

His eyes shut and he allowed Dabi to lay him on a med-bed. Dabi's fingers trailed down to the stab wound. Hawks hissed in pain, clutching the sheets.

'Sorry.' Dabi apologised, kissing his forehead. 'I'll get the droids to treat you.' 

'Stay?' Hawks pleaded, forcing his eyes open. His ego hurt just for saying that. Dabi smiled and took his hand.

'But of course, my love.'

Hawks groaned, waking up annoyingly slowly. He pushed himself up into a sitting position and checked his injury. This led to the discovery that he was now in a hospital gown. 

A droid trundled in, taking Hawks by surprise.

'Ah, you have awoken, Master Keigo.'

'Hi C4-L5.' Hawks smiled. C4 had been Dabi's droid for a long time and Hawks had got to know them.

'I am sure you will be pleased to know that your injury has healed very well, Master Keigo.' C4 reported. They walked over to Hawks and took out an IV drip Hawks hadn't noticed.

'Good to know.' Hawks replied. 'Where are my clothes? I feel naked in this.'

'Your clothes are on that chair, Master Keigo.' C4 pointed. Hawks frowned. He stumbled over and lifted up the robes.

'These aren't my clothes.' Hawks said, confused. Sure, they looked like his old clothes, but they were fancier and darker.

'These are the clothes that master Touya laid out for you.' C4 answered. 'I suggest you get dressed; Master Touya requested that you meet him in his quarters when you awoke.' Hawks shuddered. He didn't want to see Dabi.

Yes he did.

Hawks stamped down on that thought before it got out of control. he gritted his teeth, trying to control the irritation bubbling at his skin.

'He said you would hesitate.' C4 informed him. 'He also said you should consider whether you would prefer to wear a hospital gown or robes when you see him.'

'Bastard.' Hawks grumbled. 'Can you turn around or go outside?'

'Of course, Master Keigo.' C4 replied, trundling off.

Hawks got dressed quickly, not interested in being walked in on. If there was one thing Dabi was known for, it was having little patience when it came to Hawks. The robes were well-cut and very expensive. Hawks would never have been able to afford them on a Jedi's salary. Not that Jedi wore such extravagant clothing. They were a dark maroon and fit his body very well. A little too well. Hawks wondered if perhaps Dabi had measured him while he was sleeping. The thought made him eel strangely comforted.

C4 had offered to walk him to Dabi's quarters but Hawks politely refused. To put it bluntly, he didn't want any witnesses to a potential murder. Soon enough, he found himself outside of Dabi's quarters. he stared at the door for a few minutes, feeling the Sith just a few meters away, he Force Presence like a beacon, beckoning Hawks in. Eventually, he opened the door and found Dabi staring out of a viewport into space.

He did not make a habit of that, meaning Dabi was being a dramatic bitch again.

Hawks shut the door and Dabi turned around, a smile lifting his features.

'You look beautiful tonight.' Dabi walked forwards.

'You trapped me into wearing this.' Hawks replied, folding his arms. 'You know I'd rather be dead than wear one of those ugly med-gowns for one second more than I have to.' Dabi stopped and rolled his eyes.

'Do we have to go through with all this? I said you looked beautiful. In most cultures, a simple 'thank you' would suffice.'

'And the other cultures?' Hawks forced his body to relax. He wasn't in danger at least.

'A marriage.'

'Thank you.'

A half-smile appeared on Dabi's lips. He gestured towards two plush seats, indicating to sit. Hawks walked over and sat down, trying to appear unruffled. Dabi stood over him, then slipped out and cradled his cheek.

'You really do look so beautiful.' Dabi murmured. Hawks closed his eyes, allowing himself to feel just a shimmer of pleasure before remembering himself and swatting Dabi's hand away.

'What do you want, Touya?' He asked, ignoring the slightly hurt look on Dabi's face. 'And you say something ridiculous like you I will strangle myself with these stupid robes.'

'very well. You always were a negotiator.' Dabi sat opposite him, lounging like a king. 'I want your help.'

'Really?' Hawks raised an eyebrow. 'What does the Big Bad Sith Lord need my help for?'

'You're lucky I love you.'

'Am I?'

Silence descended on them for a moment. Hawks felt slightly proud od how easily he could get the Sith's back up.

'My brother's gone missing.'

'Seems to run in the family.' Hawks crossed one leg over the other. 'What have I got to do with it?'

'I want him back.' Dabi replied. 'And I want you to help.'

'What?'

'Shoto trusts you; he'd come if you reached out to him, wouldn't he?' Dabi carried on.

'Are you insane?'

'He's my brother. I want us to be a family again.'

'No.' Hawks shook his head. 'I'm not helping you. Touya, you almost killed him!' He protested.

'His troopers received exactly the same instructions as yours-'

'You blew him off a cliff.'

'They had him captured and they let him get away! So much for elite soldiers. But now, with you....he'll come running, I'm sure.' Dabi acted as if he hadn't heard any of Hawks' interruptions.

'No! You can't make me!' Hawks snapped, standing up. Dabi lazily raised his hand and Force-pushed the blond back into the chair.

'You know your Padawan's still alive.'

The blood drained from Hawks' face.

'Don't you dare touch him.' He snarled. 

'Happily.' Dabi smirked. 'It's Shoto and you I'm interested in.'

'You're asking me to choose to save one kid?'

'No, I'm telling you to save both. Shoto will be happy here. Happy and safe. And you will too. Please, Keigo. You belong with me. Just help my find my little brother.' Dabi begged.

'Do you really care about me that much?' Hawks asked, looking away so Dabi wouldn't see the tears. He'd feel them all the same.

'I told you, I'd kill myself if you left me for good.' Dabi stood up. 'Keigo, I promise, I won't hurt him. He's my brother.'

'And Tsukoyomi?' Hawks asked uneasily.

'You keep your word and I'll keep mine.' Dabi promised.

Am I really doing this?

Hawks gazed up at Dabi. Even though the man was a Sith, he still managed to look like an angel in this light.

He can't be worse than Endeavour.

Hawks nodded. He stood up.

'Ok, I'll do it.' he whispered, trying not to drown in the guilt.

Dabi laughed in delight and pulled him close. Hawks closed his eyes in shame. 

Forgive me, Shoto.

Dabi smiled and let go of him. He walked to the door and opened it. He paused.

'Come along. I want you to walk with me.' he called. Hawks, hating himself more and more, joined him.

'What do you want me to do?' Hawks asked brokenly.

'Very eager, aren't we?' Dabi tutted. 'Let's not talk about that for now. how's your injury.' Hawks grimaced.

'It's fine. No thanks to you.' he replied, struggling to control the bubbling underneath his skin. Dabi nodded.

'I wouldn't have put it past you to run away.' He said, as if that justified stabbing him. 'I did say sorry.' Hawks scowled.

'Sure.'

'I just want my family back.'

'Save for your father, I assume.' Hawks replied, quickening his pace to match Dabi's longer stride.

'My father is dead.' dabi replied. Dread shot through Hawks' body, almost stopping from shock. 'I killed him myself. It's what he deserved. He murdered my mother, made life hell for me and my siblings, and even went so far as to hurt you. his crimes were not restricted to his own family I see.'

'I don't need you fighting my battles for me.' Hawks frowned. 'I can handle myself.' They were walking through the ship, a very nice ship, Hawks loved it. Unfortunately.

'Yes, but you wouldn't kill him.' Dabi pointed out. They arrived at the viewing platform, gazing out into the beauty of ever-expanding space. 'Do you know the worst part?' hawks shook his head. 'The Jedi Council knew. They knew every fucking thing he did to us and they said nothing!' Hawks felt Dabi's righteous, blazing anger through their bond and placed a calming hand on Dabi's shoulder. 'He killed my mother first because she knew the worst. She was going to tell people and he killed her.' He spat. 'I hope he felt miserable in his last moments. My mother was an angel. And we were children.' His breath trembled and Hawks daringly moved his hand up to Dabi's cheek. The Sith relaxed at the touch, eyes fluttering closed.

Hawks could kill him now. He should kill him now. But he won't. he could've refused to listen, stormed right out, demanded to be released. But he can't.

Maybe he was wrong about Touya being dead. 

'You were having a bad dream.' Dabi told him, stroking his hair. Hawks shook in his arms, drying his tears. 'You kept shouting for someone to get out. But in a scared way, not a threatening way.'

'M-my friend,' Hawks whispered, 'Touya, he died about ten years ago in a fire. I still have nightmares about it.' He admitted.

'I'm sorry.' Dabi murmured, hugging him tightly.

'It's ok.' Hawks mumbled. 'It's not your fault.'

Dabi opened his eyes and grabbed Hawks' wrist before he could pull away. He didn't hold them exactly, he seemed more to be examining them, checking Hawks was still here.

'Thank you, Keigo.' Dabi murmured. 'I love you.' He dropped Hawks' hand and walked away.

'I love you too.' Hawks whispered.

He watched Dabi go and watched the door shut and lock. Of course he wasn't free to wander around the ship. He was a prisoner until Dabi said otherwise, and he knew Dabi was afraid he would run away.

The funny thing is, he wouldn't. An hour ago, he would have with no hesitation. Now, he wasn't so sure.

He was afraid, truth to be told. there was a bounty on his head, plus there were Dabi's private soldiers who scoured planets to search for targets. here, Dabi was right - much as it pained him to admit that -, he was safe here.

Hawks was also afraid for Shoto. His father and mother were dead, Touya was a Sith, Natsuo was doing something with Shigaraki, and Fuyumi was an Imperial senator.The poor kid had nowhere to turn. He hated to admit this as well, but right now, Dabi did seem pretty saviour-like. Hawks looked back out into space, feeling numb. The void that had started with the Purge amplified and rage bubbled under his skin, burning hotter than a lightsaber.

'Fuck!' He shouted and something exploded out of him. the chairs smashed and the floor shook. the tension inside him had snapped and a cold relief was left.

When he looked back into his reflection into the window, he saw his eyes were red. He blinked twice and they returned to gold.

His breath trembled.

He'd just used the Dark Side.

And it felt right.