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Alex makes his way down the aisle thankful that they had splurged on business class tickets and he didn’t have to go far. All he wanted in this moment was to sit down, drink whatever complimentary booze he could, cry a bit, and go the fuck to sleep. The seat next to him blissfully empty. Or sadly? He can’t even fucking decide. His phone buzzes non stop in his suit pocket and he pulls it out only long enough to turn it off and throw it in his bag. Not trusting himself to even look lest he be tempted to answer. That is a can of worms he will not be opening for a good 4-7 business days thank you very much.
Phase one of his plan is en route. Whiskey was being drank thanks to attentive flight attendants. Now to just wait for takeoff and the seatbelt sign so he could sleep and try to forget this day happened.
“Pardon me, would you mind moving this bag? I have this seat.” Alex looked up from where he had been wistfully staring out the little airplane window finding the London rain to be horribly poetic today. What he saw took his breath away. “James Bond?” He asked the tall blond man in front of him. Looking.. well… exactly like James Bond in a Tux. He was already on his third whiskey ok? His filter wasn’t great on a good day and this was most certainly not a good day.
The man looked sheepish and uncomfortable. Closing his eyes for a moment to take a breath and running his hand through his soft looking blonde hair. Alex ached to touch it not entirely convinced this wasn’t some hallucination. He might be insane. Today was a really good day to make that argument actually.
“Let’s just say there’s some relation but no” the blonde sighed. “I booked this seat not even an hour ago but I do need to leave town so if you don’t mind..” He gestured to Alex’s backpack on the seat.
“Yeah sure man, I can assure you the original person that booked it isn’t coming” Alex tried to keep the guilt out of his tone.
Should he have offered to Charlotte that she go on the honeymoon? Fuck are there etiquette guidelines here? Was he being even more the barbaric American? His mother was going to kill him. “You can run away from your wedding Alex but for goodness sakes have good manners about it! I know I raised you right.”
He could hear her in her head. Ellen Claremont was nothing if not the courteous southern lady. Every wedding guest was probably going to a receive a heartfelt, “I apologize for my son being an idiot. We dropped him on his head as a child bless his heart” apology card in the mail. Maybe thank you cards for the gifts that are returned too.
“Erm, are you okay?” Hot James Bond asked hesitantly.
“Running away from my wedding. This is my third whiskey. I just realized maybe I broke some etiquette rule in taking the honeymoon and my southern mother now has an extra reason to kill me.”
No point in being mysterious in an 11 hour flight to Fiji is there? Also Bond maybe already knows all this. Maybe he’s some trained assassin his almost father in law sent. It would make sense. Alex wonders if they can push his body out of the plane without the whole plane going under. How accurate are movies on this? How hot would Bond guy look in a parachute?
God he’s so bi. Alex snickers a bit to himself at the thought. Well if he gets to live maybe he can finally figure out the hype around prostate orgasms.
“Well this is a horrifying coincidence. I’m running from my wedding and I’m pretty sure my Gran sent a hitman after me so I suppose we can both hope this plane takes off quickly.”
Alex turns his head so fast it hurts. “You what?!”
At this, bond dude looks extra sheepish.
“It was arranged! I couldn’t go through with it. I thought I could but then I stood at the aisle and felt like I couldn’t breathe. Do you..” He looks over at Alex earnestly as if trying to suss out how much he could trust him.
He must decide yes because he continues. “Do you know what it’s like to have your whole life planned out for you and you’re just expected to deny the most integral parts of yourself to make it happen?”
Alex took a sip of his whiskey while he pondered his response. The plane was taxiing and about to take off so it’s not like there was any getting out of this proximity fueled hear to heart.
“I think I need to at least know your name before I get into how much I relate” is what he finally settled on.
“I’m Alex. Claremont Diaz” he held out his hand and baby bond shook it. Nice and firm.
“Herny. Henry Fox.”
“Had to keep the whole Bond vibe going eh?” Alex raised an eyebrow and smirked.
“Would you believe I hate tuxes? Didn’t even get to choose what I could wear.”
“Damn. Well I almost married someone whose family is racist and she never defended me against them. I was considered the ‘good kind’ of immigrant because I’m a lawyer but I hit the level of microagressions I can handle today. So I left. I don’t know why I stayed as long as I did. My sister and best friend are the reason I moved to London to begin with. Things went better at work when I had a partner to bring to stuff. It just kind of all happened. Next thing I know I realize I’m about to marry someone who I don’t think I really love? I’m not even sure she loved me. She was my boss’ daughter if that explains anything.”
Henry let out a low whistle only to be interrupted by the flight attendant making an announcement about the seatbelt sign being off.
“Lastly we would like to congratulate our newlyweds in row 2! The Claremont-Bulmers!”
Everyone clapped and Henry visibly paled. Alex graciously leaned over him and accepted the champagne flutes for both of them and thanked the flight attendants.
Good to know Fiji Airways was LGBTQ friendly he supposed.
“So Bulmer?” Henry recovered.
“Yup” answered Alex popping the p. “Was a ploy to drop the Diaz cause heaven forbid sweet English rose Charlotte have a Mexican last name.”
Henry snorted. “I have a feeling we would have been at each other’s weddings had they not been on the same day. The Bulmers are right tossers but our guest list was no better. I can’t imagine Andrew being kind to you at all much less supporting a marriage to his precious Lottie.”
“Wait you know them?!” Alex looked at Henry with this newfound information. He had the posture and poise of a British nobleman but was.. hotter? No upturned nose or wet sack type of face.
“My full last name is Fox-Mountchristen-Windsor there isn’t a lady in nobility that my Gran has not tried to set me up with I’m afraid.”
“I take it none took as you ended up in an arranged one?”
“Yes well…my Gran did keep bringing forth female identifying candidates. I am deeply gay. She is deeply against my ‘deviant desires.’ It was never going to work.”
“Damn dude.” Alex quickly put together a list in his head of what he now knew about his seat mate:
- Also a runaway groom
- Probably not racist and not like his family
- Kinda woke- he said female identifying
- Gay. Hotter than the sun and gay.
- Alex is so fucking Bi.
Ok so 5 wasn’t about Henry but more about Alex noticing the mole on his upper lip and wanting to lick it. Badly.
There’s probably some etiquette on how soon after running away from your wedding you can hook up with someone else though. He pictured his mom’s sympathy card for this. “Dear Charlotte, please accept my deepest apologies for how my son can’t keep it in his pants.”
A side glance at Henry confirms that a pissed off Ellen Claremont would be worth. He’s so fucking hot Alex can’t even.
“How did you end up engaged to Lottie?”
Well that was a question. Fair though. Alex hadn’t been holding back himself.
“We met at my law firm. She was an assistant and thinking back I think she was just there for her MRS degree. Solicitors are acceptable partners I suppose. She was cute. I was lonely being in a new country. She wanted to piss of her father and I love doing things out of spite. It spiraled from there to be honest. We dated two years. Never moved in together but her mother wanted a wedding and grandkids and we just went along with it. She probably just wanted to piss off her father more and have half brown babies. I… I don’t know what I was thinking. I work so much I didn’t really have time for a relationship or to look for one and she just wanted me to earn well, stand there, and look pretty at her society events. Didn’t ask much from me in terms of time. It was convenient. I wanted to feel like I was moving ahead in life.”
“But you wanted more?”
“I wanted more” Alex confirmed. “I don’t know how I’ll finally find work life balance now that I blew up my life and need to find a new firm.. but…” He sighs “this is going to sound stupid.”
“I’m pretty sure I won’t find it stupid Alex” said Henry softly. Alex tried not to swoon at how his name sounded in Henry’s posh accent.
“I stopped believing in love when my parents divorced. I thought I was never even going to try and I didn’t really. Standing there at that altar though- it felt wrong. I want… I want the kind of love that one goes crazy over. Where you fight about who hangs up first and we’re so cute it annoys everyone but secretly they’re jealous. My sister says I have a fire under my ass for no damn reason but really I’m just passionate. I want to love deeply and go hard like I do with everything else. I keep denying that part of myself because I’m scared of being too much and pushing people away.”
Well. He doesn’t know how this turned into a therapy session but if he can’t express his deepest fear to a fellow runaway groom on a plane then when?
“She didn’t even want sex.”
Henry chocked on his champagne. In for a penny.
“Wanted to wait until marriage. Something about the white dress being special.”
“Sorry but are we still talking about Charlotte Bulmer?” His face was red from coughing so much and the disbelief on his face strong but Henry still looked cute.
“Yes? You mentioned her dad. Has to be the same person.”
“Alex”
“Henry.”
Henry pinched the bridge of his nose as if this conversation was giving him a headache.
“Do you honestly think Charlotte was a virgin?”
“Yes? I mean, I have no reason to not? I wouldn’t care either way so why would she lie?”
Henry snorted a loud snort that has no business coming out of someone so hot.
“Charlotte the harlot?”
“What?!”
“That was her nickname at Wycombe Abbey. The boys at Eaton were quite chuffed about it to be frank. Bunch of idiots who thought they were clever giving women sexist nicknames like that. I don’t think it changed at Oxford but I didn’t really follow. Not to slut shame of course. Good for her. Though I do fear you’ve been misled.”
“Damn.”
“Quite.”
At this Henry couldn’t really hold the grin from his face and next thing Alex knew they were both laughing until tears were running down their faces.
“Can you believe I thought?” Alex couldn’t even get the full sentence out in between gasps.
“How much DID you work?” Gasped Henry while giggling.
“Too much man. Too much. I have to change my life around.”
A flight attendant came by to set up their trays and take their orders for dinner service. “You two are so precious. I hope I laugh so much with my husband one day.”
The two men just grinned at each other. “You know what they say,” giggled Henry. “Marry someone you can laugh with.” She gave them a warm smile and returned to the galley.
Any plans of passing out the minute the seatbelt sign went off had flown out the window. Alex couldn’t remember the last time he had this much fun talking to someone.
Henry shared about his older sister that was so much like June, Alex’s older sister. They both figured that their sisters would want to kill them but be happy they didn’t get married. Alex got Henry’s hand thrown over his mouth rather quickly when he almost yelled, “YOUR DAD WAS JAMES BOND?” When they had talked about their parents.
But really, Henry was his fucking twin. It wasn’t rocket science but whatever.
They argued star wars movies. Cooed over pictures of Henry’s dog (“you can’t name a dog David Henry! That’s so lame. He’s not your tax accountant.” “After Bowie you cretin!”).
They spent so much time talking and laughing until tears were running down their faces that by the time they were close to landing Alex felt devastated. He didn’t want to stop talking to Henry. He was starting to think he might never want to stop talking to Henry. Maybe Henry felt the same. Maybe he was also kicking himself for not realizing that meeting someone could even go like this. Feel like this. Make him believe in love at first sight and feel as if Disney birds are chirping around his shoulders.
“What are your plans in Fiji?” He asked reluctantly.
Henry looked startled for a moment and Alex thought he had read the whole situation wrong. The panic must have been clear in his eyes because Henry quickly touched his arm and reassured him.
“Sorry I got so startled! It just now hit me I have no plans. I don’t even have a bloody place to stay. I took the first plane out.”
“Well I’m about to check into a stupid luxurious resort with an array of amenities booked such as couples massages. It’s couples only so maybe they would turn me and my now single energy away. BUT- you do a pretty good job of pretending to be my husband and have no place to stay soooo….” Alex trailed off and watched Henry closely for his reaction.
Henry looked at him back and must have decided Alex was worth the risk because a bright grin came over his face.
“Darling I thought you’d never ask!”
———————
One year later
“Henry I swear to god if you touch your hair one more time I am going to throw black dye at it!”
The blonde stilled from where he had been fussing with his hair endlessly while waiting for their uber. Tonight was the book launch party for Henry’s book, “Runaway Grooms.” A queer romance loosely based on their own meet cute. Henry was a bundle of nerves mostly because of how personal the story got.
Alex thought it was fabulous and was incredibly proud of his boyfriend. They had both felt the need to distance themselves from London and moved into a Brownstone in New York after their faux honeymoon in Fiji. The island where they had proceeded to fall completely head over heels in love.
It was true what they say, when you know you know.
Alex was forever grateful that he had left that altar and given true love one more chance. Henry was that and more.
“To who shall I make this out to?” Henry had been signing books for what felt like an eternity. His right hand was starting to cramp and was he imagining it or was his signature changing? Would the back of his credit card no longer match? Do people still check those somewhere?
“Charlotte the Harlot.”
Henry froze and looked up right into green eyes full of amusement.
“Lottie” he gulped. “What a pleasure to see you again.”
Lottie rolled her eyes. “I know you told him Henry the twenty.” It wasn’t the best nickname. Eaton’s stellar education didn’t cover creativity as much as it should have. Henry acted like an old man and that was the best they could come up with.
Another gulp. “I’m sure I haven’t the faintest clue what you’re talking about.”
“Oh sod off! I know you’re dating Alex- good for you on finally coming out btw - and I know you told him about my shall we say wilder days.”
“It was an odd thing to lie about you must admit.”
“I was dating someone else. It was the best excuse to not cheat you idiot.”
Should he be happy to hear that morals like this were strictly adhered to while about to be marrying someone else? Microagressions against the fiancee were ok but cheating only in emotions yes? Lottie had standards.
Henry cleared his throat and quickly signed the book handing it back.
“I do hope you’re well.”
“I am” She smiled. “Seeing someone new and we’re on holiday right now. Saw the poster for your book signing and had to come.”
Henry nodded. If anything seeing Lottie was efficient. Within the next 10 minutes all of London high society would know Henry was happy with a man and a published author. It felt like poetic closure on his past life.
“Word of advice?” Lottie said leaning in. “Alex is special. I was too much into my own world to see what was before me. Learn from my mistakes and actually marry the man. He loves as unconditionally and intently as a puppy.”
The weight of the ring in his pocket suddenly felt extra heavy. Henry could only nod. “How do these Americans say? I plan to marry the shit out of him.”
With a smile, Lottie was gone and Alex’s arms were around him from the back.
“God I dodged such a bullet there baby. She was totally cheating. Nice to know she’s well though. Makes me feel less guilty for being so stupidly happy and in love with you.” He gave Henry a kiss on the cheek and stood up holding out his hand.
“Ready to go home baby?”
With a huge smile Henry took it and stood up grinning stupidly at the gorgeous man in front of him. They could be going anywhere but if he was with Alex he would be home.
“Love?”
“Hmm?”
“I’m so glad you walked out on that wedding.”
“I’m so glad you walked out on yours!”
“You and me?”
“You and me” Alex confirmed holding Henry’s hand tightly as they walked out of the bookstore into the cold New York air.